Semicolon Blues
by LilHobbitBookWorm
Summary: Kate, a Linguist from America, is now at Ouran; what shenanigans will ensue once the Host Club gets their hands on her? "My life was hell. My life was hell because it was hell inside Tamaki's head. His brand of hell had now become my existence. Lovely"
1. Welcome to the Host Club Princess Nerd

A/N- So thank you to you if you opened this up and I hope that you enjoy it. I just finished watching the Anime Ouran HSHC, and I was so stoked about this idea I had to write it down. It would be really great if you would let me know what you think about it! So I hope you enjoy and, as always, Read and Review if you liked it and want me to continue. Thanks and I hope to see you in the next one.

I do not own Ouran.

There is some cursing, just a warning. Also I am trying a more stream-of-consciousness first person narration so it is a bit different. I also rarely re-read my own fiction, so if you catch any grammar mistakes let me know and I will re-read the chapter.

IIIII

Welcome to Ouran Academy Princess Nerd!

I can't believe I am lost in an airport in Japan. Honestly this would be so much easier if I could read Japanese instead of just being able to speak it. Of course I was too busy writing a Master's Thesis to take just one extra class in order to learn the writing characters for the words I knew and not just the English transliteration. Damnit…stupid brain. Sometimes I just want to stab it with a q-tip. Ever feel like everything you've worked for has come to absolutely nothing? That everything around you is just falling down around you and all that you can do is shrug and say, "Fuck this?" Yeah…that is what I thought.

So anyways, where was I, oh yeah, I don't know! I keep wandering around all of these corridors in the airport, tripping over my own two feet trying to get out of the way from all of the people rushing towards me and past me.

Anyways, wow, I keep doing that don't I, anyways it really sucks that I am stuck in the airport. The school that I now work for—which is weird for me to say since until now I have been unemployed since that one tutoring job as an Undergraduate—was supposed to send a taxi, or limo, or street-cart, or something to come and help me get to the school on time.

Shit, it would have helped if I would have just stayed in the same place as I exited from the airplane. But of course, though I pride myself on my intelligence, I really, really, really can be such a complete moron sometimes. So, like swimming upstream, I decide that it would probably be best to go back to the gate where my plane let me of, just in case. It seems like I've been walking forever, probably because anytime you are lost it seems like time leaves you too. I think that that is part of the fright of getting lost, the fact that you feel disconnected from everyone and everything, including time.

"Kathrin Amendier?" A masculinly feminine (oxymoron much?) voice yelled in front of me. I raised my hand, so glad that someone had said my name loudly enough above the riotous noise, and basically sprinted to the voice, hurdling suitcases as I ran towards what turned out to be a very masculine woman (again oxymoron?) with red hair and a purple skirt-suit.

"Oh Thank Goodness!" I screamed at the top of my lungs as I flew towards the woman, nearly knocking her down in the process, "Oops, I am super duper sorry about that. I was just so excited to see you that I…sorry."

"Oh, dear, don't you worry about it one bit. I am just glad that I was able to find you. Dear you look frightened half to death. If I were to send my little Haruhi to another country for school she wouldn't go alone, I can tell you that."

"I'm not a high school student…Mrs…"

"Fujioka, Ranka Fujioka. I usually don't work for Ouran, but I'm always looking for odd jobs just to make a little bit of extra money. And not a high school student? You look like you could be just fifteen, my little Haruhi's age."

"I'm not sure that I should take that as a complement" I mumbled under my breath at the woman, strange woman. It just hit me, Ranka didn't pronounce my name right. I am of both French and German-American decent, with a little bit of Cherokee in there somewhere, so my last name is pronounced like this, [Ah-men-dee-ey], you don't pronounce the [R] at all. If I could give the IPA, international phonetic alphabet, spelling I wouldn't. Anyways, I hoped that this Ranka person would be a bit quicker about getting me to the school that I am teaching at this semester, instead I kept my mouth shut and walked behind Ranka, listening to her tell me all about this "darling Haruhi" and how she was so intelligent that she was admitted to the prestigious Ouran High School, coincidently the school I would be teaching at. Really this Haruhi didn't sound that bad at all.

"She is probably one of the brightest girls I've ever met, including her mother of course."

Mother? I must have heard that wrong. We finally got outside, which was heavenly and hellish at the same time. I felt like a vampire as the sun proceeded to burn out my retinas, but not like that sissy vampire that sparkles—Edmond, Edgar…something like that. I clinched my eyes to save the cornea from dissolving and the retina melting into my brain that I failed to see the passenger door of a black Town Car open and ran right into it. Do you know how much my ass hurt after landing on the cold concrete?

"I'm sorry. I didn't see that you were coming; I only saw my dad." A young girl with short brown hair and brilliantly large hazel eyes, and looked oddly like a boy until you got to the skirt she was wearing, gazed down at me, offering her hand. I wasn't going to not accept either her apology or her hand so I clasped onto her very soft, and I mean soft, fingers and pulled myself up.

"Dad?" Of course Kathrin, don't fixate on the apology but fixate on what seems to be linguistically relevant. I am such a nerd.

"Of course I am her Daddy!" Ranka pulled the girl, apparently Haruhi, into himself. She didn't look to pleased and the sight of probably one of the cutest girls who also looked like a guy being hugged, unwillingly, by probably one of the best tranny's I had ever seen in my life was amazng. They were awkwardly cute in a good way, it was quite refreshing after coming from a place where being openly gay was a legitimate crime against humanity.

"Haruhi, this is Kathrin Amendier," Ranka said again. Wrongly again, I might add, "She is going to be a new student at Ouran. Just like you?"

"Did you hear nothing I said in the airport?" I grumbled. I had his puberty a long time ago and was definitely not in a rush to repeat it. Plus the fact that I had nearly a DD cup might clue someone, especially a tranny, into the fact that I was way past high school age. Just because I'm short doesn't mean I'm young.

I just shook my head and stifled a chuckle when Haruhi shrugged and whispered to me, "You will have to excuse him, he is a bit eccentric and clueless when it comes to things. Besides, I could tell that you weren't a student, you sound too smart for that." Haruhi cocked her head and softly smiled at me, her eyes closing as she did.

That was the cutest thing I think I had ever seen in my life, but don't tell her that.

The ride to Ouran was pretty silent on my part, even though Ranka was telling his daughter all of the things that she needed to work on when she went on the first day of school. Wow, actually, despite the cluelessness, Ranka is actually a very concerned father. It was nice to see a man care that much for his daughter, goodness knows _I_ had never seen it before.

"Good luck! Remember to be on your best behavior!" Ranka called to me as I got out of the Town Car, Haruhi right behind me getting my bag out of the trunk. I nodded my thanks and gave him as I exited and then gave two 5,000 Yen bills to Haruhi. I could make out the numbers, just not any of the words, which would work for me. Haruhi, being not only cute but oh so sweet, handed me back one of the bills.

"You speak Japanese well enough, but your money counting skills need a little bit of work, you just gave me about 100 dollars."

"Oh, well, you can take the other one, I don't mind. I mean we don't give taxi's at home more than 25 bucks sometimes, but you both helped me a lot. Consider it a 'welcome to High School' gift from me to you." I gave the bill back to Haruhi, which turned out to be stupid since I didn't have any more Yen, and the only money I had left was a single hundred dollar bill that I couldn't even use at a hotel. Either way, I hadn't noticed that as I waved goodbye to Ranka and Haruhi and they drove away.

With a large sigh I looked at Ouran Academy. It looked like they stole Big Ben from London parliament and painted it pink. The meeting with the Chairman of the school itself, I don't really remember his name, went alright and once I explained my…predicament…he told me that I could just sleep in my classroom as long as no one saw me. Oh well, it is better than sleeping in the gutter.

My class wasn't starting till the second day of school, which meant that I got an entire day to hide all of my belongings in the locked closet's around the room and, I don't know why but, conveniently there was a small fold out cot in one of the closets. I made sure that I set the alarm on my I-home to wake me up early enough that none of the students would walk in on me in my pajamas. Also, conveniently, the gym and showers were right next to my classroom. Did you even know that there could be disposable shampoo and conditioner holders in showers at a High School? Rich people have everything. It is cool though. After taking a long shower, almost dosing off and nearly drowning a few times, I closed the blinds in the classroom and settled down in the cot, my college sweatshirt serving as a blanket and my laptop case as a pillow.

I hate mornings. I hate mornings when I sleep in so I hate them even more when I actually have to get up and do something productive. I sat up in the cot and could barely see the room around me. It looked as if there was fog covering my eyes. Damn Vampirism…the sun really did scorch out my retinas. I only joke, I woke up soon after. The process of waking up is what I hate about the morning; once I am away it is like I've had way to many happy pills. I got dressed in what my mother had told me was appropriate attire for a teacher at a rich private school.

I looked like a fucking grandmother. A plaid skirt, and turtleneck were okay at the worst of times, but knee-highs should have been outmoded in the 80's.

I shoved away all of my personal belongings except for placing a picture of my mother on my desk. Despite her horrendous taste in Teacher-ware she was probably one of the most important things in my life other than my kitten, Freckles, who my mother was going to bring me once I was able to get my own place. If.

Sitting at my desk was nice. The chair was one of those nice desk-chairs with the leather and the ability to swivel. I spent about five minutes spinning around and around in the chair before two extremely handsome boys walked into my classroom.

"Hello Sensei Amendier." The two of them said together, their voices nearly indistinguishable from one another. I looked up at them, trying to hide the slight blush that was fighting to show itself in my ghostly pale skin.

"You must be…" I looked down at my role-sheet, panicking slightly as I couldn't find the spot where, when I had looked at the role the night before, I had spotted the same last name, "Aha…got it. Kaoru and Hikaru Hitachiin. Good Morning!"

They both smiled at me, leaning forward and looking me in the face before plopping two green apples on my desk and walking arm in arm to two desks. Their eyes and looks scared me as I grabbed the apple. I would have to think about something for breakfast since there was no food on campus, and I sure didn't have the ability to go and find myself food. As I bit into the apple I glared up at the two male students who, despite their beauty, were beginning to grow horns on the side of their head. The apple was rotten and I am pretty sure that the uncomfortable gooeyness in the back of my mouth was not apple.

"Thank you Hitachiin Twins." I smiled as sweetly as I could and made it look like I threw the apple out in the trash can beside of my desk, really sticking it in a drawer in the middle of my desk.

"Goodmorning, Ame-san!" A voice from above called down to me. I stopped fixating my eyes on the two twin menaces and looked up past a very stoic hotty and noticed a little strawberry-blond boy holding a very plump bunny. The stoic one grunted and I stood up immediately, which barely closed the gap between us as I am 5'1 and this guy looked like he had to be over 6'5". I could be wrong though, "I'm Honey and this is Mori. We're going to go sit down now, bye!"

So…damn…adorable. I slumped back down at my desk, staring as the little teenager named Honey hopped down off of the large teenager named Mori's shoulders, using both of the twins desks as hopping stones before jumping into another desk.

Other students began to file in one at a time but I just couldn't stop staring at the four boys who all sat in the same row. It was like a connect four of hotness, and I had just won the second game out of three. The fact that I am 25 makes this awkward and the fact that I am there teacher makes it just plain pedophilic. I rummaged around the desk for a few more minutes, aware that the twins were still staring at me, their eyes turning redder and the horns curling in even more. I checked my pulse discreetly. I seemed normal so there was no poison in that apple. I took my time to write my name on the board, in my own little world until I heard a deep and very sultry voice say my name.

"Amendier, Kathrin Joy was born in California, USA on November 5th 1985 and moved to Pennsylvania, USA after her mother's horrible break-up with her father. She graduated Valedictorian from High School and went on to get two B.A. degrees, one in English Education and another in Romance Languages. After credentialing and student teaching she got her master's degree in Linguistics, her Thesis being on Androgyny and Language. She couldn't get a job because she was overqualified and, therefore, she now teaches an Elective English Grammar and Usage class as Ouran Academy. Kathrin speaks English, French, German, and Spanish fluently, knows Latin and Japanese more than typically well, and has been studying Greek."

How the hell did this…oh my beating heart…another gorgeous boy, and this one with glasses. Be still my heart! And he was sitting right next to the other one. Yahtzee!

"Kyouya!" Another voice screamed as a blond blur ran through the class and sat next to the sultry student with glasses.

"Tamaki, I didn't know that you would be taking this class." Kyouya said quite a bit harshly. I decided to pick up my role-sheet and walk around the class, asking people their names. I got over to the boys.

"I already have the four of you," I said, sticking my tongue out to the two twins as I passed them. Yes, it was immature, but I didn't care, "You must be Kyouya Ootori, and you must be Tamaki Suoh." I smiled politely at the two of them, only to have Kyouya nod and Tamaki stand, winking at me, pulling out a rose from somewhere.

"Bonjour. I hope that your stay at Ouran will be pleasurable, princess." The blond hair fluttered down past Tamaki's blue eyes. If I liked blonds I wouldn't be able to resist, but as I didn't it was easy to ignore his comment and walk back to the front of the room. I saw Tamaki's shoulders slump as he curled up into his desk, and I really did almost feel sorry for him, but class was starting.

"So, it looks like everyone is here except…" I looked down at my list, recognizing the name that was not crossed out."

"I'm here Sensei!" Haruhi's voice rang out from the back door to the classroom. She was breathing pretty heavily, but that didn't strike me as odd. The fact that she was wearing a boy's uniform was. I shrugged it off though, thinking about Ranka the Transexual, and decided to continue pondering this question after class, with her present.

"Haruhi Fujioka, next time you come to my class make sure that you are not late, understand me. If you could join me after class…"

"I have a class after this one Sensei, can I come after school?" I nodded and shooed her to her seat, ignoring the "But what about the Host Club" that came from Tamaki. I shook my head, deciding to put all of my questions aside until after the class. This was the one of the only classes I was teaching in English, and with the sextet of male beauty in front of me, to which the cute Haruhi had joined…unfair…it was going to be m favorite.

"This is an Elective class so if you don't want it on your transcript you can get out," I said in English. It was the first time I had used my native tongue to anyone other than myself since I arrived, so it felt like exercising a muscle I hadn't used in a while, "It is an Advanced English Grammar and Usage class so if you do not know English near to fluently then you can leave as well. My name is Kathrin Amendier, pronounced [A-men-dee-ey], but you can call me Kate. Welcome to the first day of class!"

The day passed quickly, My German class went well, Kyouya suprising me with his mastery of German. I also taught one Introduction to Linguistics class, taught in English like my morning class, which, surprisingly, Tamaki and Kaoru were in together. I didn't expect Tamaki to be into "words" the way that I was into them, but I guess that you can never judge a book by its cover or its annoyingness. And it was a surprise to see Kaoru separated from his twin, but he rushed off soon after in order to be with him I supposed.

Later in the day Haruhi showed up in my classroom, knocking softly on the door. She was still dressed in the boy's uniform, and she looked anxious to get somewhere.

"Haruhi, it is good to see you again. I didn't think that I would get a chance to fully thank you and your father for staying at the airport and waiting for me, I was pretty much frantic when I ran into him."

"No, no, it's no problem. I'm glad that we were able to help," She smiled and cocked her head again…so cute!

"Don't worry about coming in late, most of the first five minutes will be spent taking roll and chattering with everyone about their days. I just wanted to say thank you."

"Don't worry about it Sensei."

"Kate, please call me Kate. By the way Haruhi, why are you wearing a boy's uniform?" She smiled at me and I nodded for her to procede. It turned into a very long story, involving all of the boys that had been in my morning class. Apparently she didn't mind it as long as she could pay off her debt.

"Well, Haruhi, your secret is safe for me on one condition," She looked at me a little bit skeptically, her large hazel eyes expecting me to say something akin to her having to repay me tenfold for destroying a vase, "I wan't you to help me shop. I can't read Japanese to save my life, and I need food or I'll…" Appropriately my stomach growled and the both of us laughed heartily. I stood up and put on my coat and grabbed the keys to the classroom, "I'll walk you to Music Room #3. I haven't toured the school yet so I'd like to do it while it is still light out." I smiled at her and she smiled back. At least I had made a friend today. It didn't hurt that I was keeping a huge secret for her…not that I would use it as blackmail of course. Mwahahaha…just kidding.

The two of us walked down the hallway, Haruhi pointing out some of the things that had happened at the first host club meeting, including how a girl was jealous of the fact that Tamaki was doting on her and that he was the last one to figure out that she was a girl, not a homosexual boy, and that he only noticed after seeing her change into the girls uniform. It was an interesting story, and I would get to see this Host Club first hand.

We got to Music Room #3 and the two of us opened the door. A warm breeze blew through the door, along with a number of rose petals that smelled so sweetly. I walked in with Haruhi, only to walk into the arms of Tamaki.

"Ame-Sensei, what a pleasure it is to have you join us as a distinguished guest of the host club. Truly your western beauty will shine as deeply as does your soul." His voice was like mealting butter in my ears, and his touch was soft. The mysterious rose appeared as he focused my eyes to his blue ones.

I wanted to laugh. He was laying it on so thickly that I had to say something to stop the eruption of laughter that was working its way up my windpipe.

"Tamaki,"

"Yes, princess?"

Oh my gosh this was way too much.

"It must be hell inside your head!" I burst out the words and followed them up with so much laughter that I doubled over. The room suddenly went cold as Tamaki seemed to fly back to the corner and begin to sulk. I heard Haruhi laugh, the twins high five, and I swore that, out of the corner of my eye, I could see Mori and Kyouya smile.


	2. I'll Get You Next Time Hitachiin Twins

I'll Get You Next Time Hitachiin Twins!

"How do you have even a modicum of energy left after this club?!" I was dragging myself along the wall, Haruhi next to me making sure that I didn't fall over the other way. After spending a few hours with the host club I was exhausted. Whether it was Tamaki's overzealous rendition of "Prince Charming" and then his sulking when it failed to work on both Haruhi and myself, Hikaru and Kaoru engaging in fascinatingly awkward displays of brotherly affection, or Honey diving at me for a hug and making me eat strawberry cake with him, they all tired me out.

"They all are a little bit much sometimes, but you can't help but be drawn to them. It isn't just their faces or the wealth either. Each of them has something special, something unique." Haruhi clasped her hands in front of her, looking down at her feet and smiling. Her cute smile was contagious.

"I can tell. Especially by the way you interact with them. It all seems to come second nature to you. Maybe that is why they call you a natural?" She laughed at my joke before I completely lost my balance and fell on her.

"You're as clumsy at Tamaki, Ame-san!" Honey's sweet voice echoed through the hallway as he grabbed Haruhi's arm.

"…" Mori (said?) as he picked me up and threw me over his shoulder and began walking towards my classroom. I couldn't help but notice how strong his shoulders felt as I propped myself up with my hands. It was all I could do not to begin to rub the strong and broad shoulders underneath the powder blue jacket. Of course then I remembered that he was my student.

"Mori, could you please put me down this is a little bit embarrassing and rather inappropriate considering my position." To be honest I really didn't want to be let down, I _really_ didn't, but it makes me proud that I did the honorable thing.

"…"

"Takashi is a nice guy, isn't he Ame-san?!" Honey jumped onto the broad shoulders I just vacated, and I can't say that along with the nod of affirmation I gave the small teenager was also a tiny sigh. Really it just wasn't fair that one place could contain so many rich and beautiful people, very unfair.

"Well, thank you Mori, Honey, and Haruhi." We had arrived at the door to my classroom, and I definitely didn't want them to know that I was staying at Ouran. It was embarrassing enough that I couldn't read their language but was expecting them to be able to read and write English in my class. I didn't need these rich people, or even Haruhi for that matter, to find out that I couldn't afford a place of my own to stay. I nodded to them and began walking into the classroom.

"Ame-san, do you want the rest of this cake?"

"Mitsukuni…"

"It's okay, Takashi. I have more at home!" Honey pulled out an entire flat of cake from somewhere. How can one human being, especially someone as small as Honey, consume all of that cake during the club, and then have a place to store a single cake that is one foot in diameter.

"Thanks you guys. Well I need to get to sle…I mean, get some work done before I go home for the evening." I avoided Haruhi's gaze; she seemed to be questioning me with those big hazel eyes. I felt as if she was reading my mind.

"See you tomorrow, Ame-san!" Honey vocalized, brandishing his small arm in goodbye as they walked down the hallway.

"I don't understand how that boy has so much energy!" I walked into the room and laid that cake on the desk, sitting down in the chair.

"Sensai…" Haruhi began.

"I told you to call me 'Kate,' remember?" Haruhi nodded at me, sitting down in the desk in front of my chair. I made like I was filling out some paperwork before looking up at the girl in front of me. Technically this was still the first day of classes for me, how was it that I had made an impact on anyone this fast? "Yes?"

"I was wondering if you wanted help learning how to read and write in Japanese. You speak the language really well for a foreigner, even better than Tamaki-sempai does sometimes; I am sure that you could pick it up pretty quickly. The writing would take longer, but the characters should be okay for you to understand if you work hard enough."

She is so adorable!!!

"I would love that, Haruhi. Thank you so much." I gave her the most charming smile I could muster. She gave me another one of her award winning grins before getting up and walking out of the room.

I leaned back in the chair, staring up at the ceiling. Is that polished marble? Haha, my first day at Ouran and I was not only learning about a different culture than my own but an entirely different socio-economic status. This is probably how Haruhi feels too, being the only "commoner" at this academy. I was surprised that she didn't get angry every time the other members of that Host Club brought in the fact that she was poor; I guess it rests in the fact that she finds them all interesting people, also in the fact that she can glare at them and spook them all half to death.

I really don't deserve her kindness again. Her father and her were so kind to me when they picked me up from the airport; no one except for my mother had treated me like that before, and now she was offering to teach me how to recognize Japanese characters and maybe even reproduce them myself. Shrugging I got up from the chair and went to the door, closing it and locking it, leaning back against it once I was safe from detection.

Damn stomach, it was grumbling. I was immediately glad that Honey had given me that cake; I felt like I could eat the entire thing. As I sat back down at the desk and began eating the cake I looked over at the second apple one of the twins had given me. Which one was which again? I could probably tell them apart because of the way that they part their hair, and I am probably going to see Kaoru twice a day now since he will be in both Grammar and Linguistics, but who the hell would be able to tell them apart.

Feeling like a beached whale after eating the entirety of the cake—speaking of which, who knew that I had that big of a sweet tooth—I grabbed a napkin from the desk and took out the rotten apple that had continued to rot in my desk the whole day. It was a good thing that I thought about putting a piece of plastic down underneath it after the first period class. I took the apple and put it in the cake box, placing the cake box on one of the twin's chairs.

That will hopefully teach them, I grinned then shook my head at the apparent epic fail of playing a prank on a student that played a prank on me first. What was I a five year old again? Shrugging it off I changed into my pajamas and unfolded the cot from the closet, using my sweatshirt as a blanket once again. With a sigh I shut my eyes, praying for a decent night's sleep in preparation for the next day.

IIIII

Yes…decent night's sleep…what the hell was I thinking…why me?

_Beep_

Something was making the most annoying beeping sound. It could be the school, but I really didn't think so considering that there was no beeping the night before.

_Beep Beep_

Fuck. How am I supposed to sleep through this? The beeping got faster. I reached to the side of me, trying to find my glassed in the dark and failing miserably.

_Beep Beep Beep_

Screw it. I wouldn't be able to see in the dark any better. Unfurling myself from the cot I sleepily walked over and turned on the light.

"Ah, the vampirism is back. Damn." I flinched, grumbling at the fluorescent lights hanging over me.

_Beep Beep Beep Beep _

It was coming from my desk. I placed out my hands in front of me, attempting to do karate moves, faking ninja status so that I would be ready for the unexpected. Really if anyone was watching me at this moment I would be so embarrassed, but live and let die I guess. Besides, everyone does stupid things when they are alone. You can't say that you haven't turned out the lights in the house and pretended to be a ninja escaping from a sinister assassin.

_Beep Beep Beepbeepbeepbeep BOOM_

Shit. Fuck. Shit. Damn! I just got puked on by an apple! The other green apple on the desk was what was ticking. It began to tick faster. It opened and splattered its confetti guts all over my desk and all over me.

"Curse you Kaoru!" I fell to my knees, being way more melodramatic than I actually needed to be, "Curse you Hikaru!"

It turned out to be a long night, especially since I was up for about an hour making sure that I picked up each and every piece of confetti off of my desk and off of the floor. It would have been so much easier if there were a broom of a vacuum in the room, but no, the rich school will have a cot in one of the closets, but it doesn't have anything to clean up with. Oh no, heaven forbid.

Shaking my head I tossed the confetti all over the Twin's desks, setting the apple bomb's shell into the cake box with the other maggot filled apple. Dragging myself back to the cot was painful, but as soon as I hit the pillow I was out cold. Unfortunately what woke me up wasn't my alarm clock, but a soft but consistent tapping on the locked door.

"Fuck!!!" School was going to start in about half an hour. I ripped off my pajamas and slipped into some black slacks and a blue button down shirt that made me look much less like a grandmother than the plaid, and opened the door while brushing my hair back into a ponytail. I hate not showering every morning. Hate.

"Goodmorning Ame-sens…Kate." Haruhi's sweet voice cooed as she entered that class and moved to her seat from the other morning, looking questioningly at the confetti on the seats next to her, "Uh, sensei…"

"I don't want to talk about it." I said, probably a bit too harshly, but I was really in no mood to answer any questions about the apple-bomb or my night. I was too busy trying to find a time during the day when I would be able to shower. Damn it all!

"You don't look like you slept very well; did you get home too late?" Haruhi asked, walking up to my desk, pulling over a chair, and sitting down next to me. She was staring at me with those eyes. I bit my lip, trying not to just spill out my tale of woe and sorrow.

"Yes, I had a lot to do last…" I paused as two red-haired fiends walked into the room, and up to the desk. Each of them had an apple in their hands. "Night." I finished before standing and following the two twins to their desks, leaning down so that we were eye to eye.

"You two are going to serve detention today. There is nothing that you can do to stop me giving you detentions." My voice was cold, ice cold. They had interrupted my sleep. I never did well without a complete eight hours of sleep, and the morning shower was something me and my long brown hair could _not_ go without.

"Princess, please…" Oh shit, where the hell did Tamaki come from?! "Both of these boys don't even know what they have done. You should tell them what they are being punished for before sentencing them for the crime."

"They know what they did, you can tell by the smirks on their faces." Tamaki just smiled at me, his head tilted so that his blond bangs hung softly into his face. Really, did this guy ever know how to not play up his blond wavy locks and startling blue eyes? He was a fucking professional.

"Since you seem to be accusing them of making this mess in the classroom and for feeding you a rotten apple yesterday, I can punish them in the Host Club's preferred method. It is going to take away some business from the club, however."

"When the hell did he get here?" I whispered to myself as the icy chill of Kyouya's words circled behind me. I swear that shivers went up my spine.

"Fine. This time I'll let your punishment be placed in your peer's capable hands," I looked over at Kyouya who had taken out a black book and was writing down some type of madness into it. Why did he have to be taking two classes with me?!

I began to walk away when I heard two voices call my name at the same time. For a moment it astounded me that the two of them could sound so much alike, and yet if I were to put the pitches of their voices on a scale they would be speaking in an interval, a 3rd to be precise. Quite interesting, I mused as I turned around, my arms crossed in front of my chest.

"You have confetti in your shirt." One of the twins said, the one that I am pretty sure was Hikaru, though I was probably wrong.

"Yeah, Sensei, you should at least clean up after you go out and party, or everyone will know where you've been." Kaoru…no…this one seemed like Hikaru too. Damn it. Anyways, the other twin said. The horns from the day before began to appear again as I turned around and walked briskly to the front of the classroom, looking down and unfortunately seeing that they were right.

"Kaoru, Hikaru, stop making this harder on her than it already is." I heard Haruhi snap in my defense. I wanted to turn around and thank her, but I could already feel the blush coming to my cheeks. Forcing it away I turned and faced the class.

"Everyone take out your worksheets from yesterday and get with a partner to go over each of your answers. Talk about why you answered the way that you answered and make changes on your papers. We will go over them as a class in ten minutes." I gave out my instructions before sitting down on my chair. As soon as I sat down and heard something smash underneath my weight, a disgusting sound. Immediately I looked up, my green eyes meeting two sets of amber eyes. I watched them grin widly at one another before shaking hands above the desk in plain view.

I am going to get those twins one day. I swear it. Their pretty little heads will be mine for hood ornaments. Mwahahaha….mwahahaha…mwahahaha!

IIIII

A/N – So this is the next chapter and I hope that if you got this far that you like it. I am always up for ideas of situations to put the characters in, and I am also up for some constructive criticism. So if you liked this chapter or the first chapter whatsoever it would be really great if you could review. Any feedback would be awesome, especially since I haven't written and Ouran fic before.


	3. The Job of a High School Teacher

**Disclaimer: Even though my main character does speak all these different languages, does not mean that I do (even though I wish I did). My translations came from crosschecking Google translator with other language translation sights. For the two foreign phrases I use in this chapter, the French one should mean something like "Darling, you look spectacular" and the German one is "Good Morning." I just wanted to clear this up just in case I accidently butcher someone's language. Know that I am not meaning to on purpose, I am just trying to make it more authentic. If it does offend you then let me know and I will take it out. Thanks! Be sure to read and review!**

The Job of a High School Teacher!

"Thursday, Thursday, Thursday" I sung aloud to the conga music playing in my head as the water washed the shampoo from my hair. This morning I noticed that the scented shampoo in these dispensers changes every day. Today was a very nice smelling pear-ish scent, which made today even better than most Thursdays. Thursdays were always my favorite days because I still had one more day to be productive and finish doing everything I needed to do, but the weekend was only a day away.

Ouran was different than I had imagined it to be. After only a few weeks of teaching here I was exhausted. It wasn't the actual teaching that bugged me, hell no, it was the fact that everyone here seemed to drain my life force. It was as if I was stuck in a Tim Burton movie and everybody's personality was intensified infinitesimally. Persona on acid.

Either way, it was Thursday. Haruhi was going to help me go shopping for food. For some reason the key to the kitchen was dropped off on my desk during the middle of the night, a bright pink bow wrapped around it. I wasn't sure whether I should be ecstatic that someone thought about me in that way or whether I should be afraid that someone had the ability to get into my classroom while I was sleeping. Freddy Kruger…GRAAAAA! I held up three fingers and began swiping at the air in front of me. Perhaps that is more Wolverine than Freddy. Either way is awesome really.

After my Freddy/Wolverine fun I stepped out of the shower and into my cotton bathrobe, snuggling myself into the blue fluff. Looking into the mirror I pulled up my hand, admiring a small opal ring I received from my mother for my college graduation, pretending that I was one of my rich students.

"Le chéri, vous paraissez spectaculaire." My eyes bat as I bring my hand to my lips and kiss the audience goodbye as I saunter out of the bathroom and back to my classroom, giving all of my adoring fans waves throughout the hallway. One word can describe my gallantry and grace: Dweeb!

"La Musica!" I stuck the key into the closet all of my clothes were hanging up in and opened it, leaning down and turning on my iHome, sounds of sweet Americana floating out as I pulled out a white skirt and brown shirt. Plan, simple, cute. As much as I loved my mother, her taste in clothing scared me and made me feel like I smelled like baby powder—no offence meant to her of course.

_Beelzebub has a devil put aside for me…_

Queen, yes, Queen was the best slice of American for the best day of the week.

_For me…for MEEEEEEE!_

I cemented the high note, beginning to dance and air guitar around the room. My heels were clicking on the floor, keeping time. I could feel the disco ball above me, see the strobe lights highlighting my voluptuous figure, and hear the adoring fans roaring, calling my name.

_So you think you can stone me and spit in my eye!_

Oh where is my hairbrush? I spotted and grabbed it in a second, holding it to my lips and rocking along with the queen himself. Freddy Mercury, lend me your song from the great beyond. Hm…Freddy Kruger, Freddy Mercury they all have one thing in common…Kathrin Amendier being a doofus…it _is_ a good day.

_So you think you can love me and leave me to die._

_Oh baby, can't do this to me baby._

I nodded my head, my hair circling around it for the full embodiment of the 80's. Of face make-up, glam rock, and tights, Oh my!

_Just gotta get out, just gotta get right out of heyar._

I moved my body in weird gyrations around the room, the hair brush flying through my brunette hair in order to tame the hot mess and back to my lips before being dropped entirely as I picked up my air guitar and slid on the floor, leaning back and arching my spine for the full rocker effect.

"Excuse me." An audible screech stopped my rocking out. You know, one of those screeching noises that sounds like a record being scratched, the precious vinyl being destroyed by an unknown interruption.

"Guten morgen, Kanako!" I jumped up, brushing the dust from the white skirt and smoothing out my hair before walking to my desk and directing the girl with the soft voice that had interrupted one of my top ten most embarrassing jam sessions towards an empty chair next to it.

"I'm sorry if I disrupted you. I can come back later if I am bothering you…" Her voice trailed off into a shy whisper as I shook my head, patting the chair and inviting her to sit down.

"What do you need, hun? You're in Intro to Linguistics right? We just learned about the basic characteristics of phonemes. Do you remember what a phoneme is?"

"The smallest unit of sound making up a word?" Her tone reached upwards toward the end. I nodded, she was right of course, but she was afraid she didn't know what she was talking about, which was always a problem with these types of classes. Linguists, as a rule, loved to make people feel inferior and stupid, but it really wasn't that hard to understand if you were taught by someone who didn't believe you to be inferior. My father was a linguist…and that career path is about all that I have in common with him, and because of him I hate making my students feel inferior.

"Good. So if I said 'Kanako,' what would be the first phoneme in that beautiful name?" She blushed before looking up and making the [K] sound, like the beginning of "Kate" or "Kruger."

I tutored her for a little while, talking about the difference between the place and manner of articulation. To be honest I may explain it later if you want, but it is decently represented on Wikipedia and, again to be honest, you would probably rather look it up there instead of hearing me jabber about bilabial stops and velar nasals. Don't those things just sound like so much fun?

I think so.

I'm a nerd…don't judge me!

IIIII

"Kate-sensei! Hi!" Haruhi addressed me when I picked her up from the Host Club at the end of the day. The room was decked out in tropical arrangement, Tamaki and the other boys in what I supposed to be some type of tropical cosplay.

"Hey, Haruhi. Boys. How were your days?" I asked them. I had seen all of them in the morning, and surprisingly it was very normal. The twins didn't do anything mischievous, Honey fell asleep in class, Kyoya was a smart ass like always, and Tamaki just stared out the window all class. Really it was a pretty normal day.

"Ame-san, are you going to come to the dance? You should, you should, you should!" Honey jumped in front of me, his little bunny's ears flapping with each motion.

"Well, I don't know. I like dances, but I would have nothing to wear. Besides, the dance is Friday night…I…uh…I'll have stuff to do." I began to scratch my head to seem preoccupied. Really I didn't need them to find out that I would be at Ouran when they were having their celebration, but I would feel much better about watching it from the classroom rather than participating in student frivolities. If I was meant to be a chaperone then someone would have asked me, right?

"That's too bad." Hikaru, I'm sure it was Hikaru because of how much deeper his voice was, it was a voice I only heard once during the day. Kaoru was in two of my classes so whenever they spoke separately I could tell them apart. Unfortunately this always meant that they never spoke in first period English Grammar unless they spoke together, their mouths curling into the smirk that I was sure meant death was coming at me soon, very, very soon.

"You might look good in one of our mother's designer gowns for westerners." Kaoru chimed in, both of them getting extremely close to me, looking down at me.

"None of the models we've met are as curved as you are. It would be interesting to try it out!" Both twins said at the same time, leaping up in the air, a ball-gown materializing around them.

"Would you two guys cut it out. We need to leave." Haruhi had changed into more feminine looking clothing, her schoolbag replaced by a rather large handbag. She grabbed me by the wrist, pulling me out of the chain-like grasp of Hikaru and Kaoru whose faces were looking surprised.

"Whew…thanks for that." I said as soon as we were outside. Really I didn't like being fussed over by people other than close friends and, since I still had a personal vendetta against both of the twins, allowing them to make me into their pear-shaped Barbie wasn't going to work for me.

"Don't worry, they do that all the time." She rolled her eyes and we headed out of Ouran, walking down the streets. We seemed to descend from prime business real estate and beautiful houses to suburbia. From how all of the students were talking about Haruhi, I was thinking that she would be incredibly poor, but once we arrived at her apartment, I couldn't see that it was anything different from a regular two bedroom apartment in the States.

"This isn't much by any standards, but it is home." Haruhi said as she placed her purse on the counter and began to bustle around the kitchen in order to make some tea.

"It's wonderful. My mother and I spent most of my life sharing a bedroom at one of her co-workers houses. It wasn't until my last year of high school that we were able to move out into our own apartment." I shrugged off my own purse and began to walk around the kitchen, and then into the dining room. Looking around I saw small display protruding from the corner, small heirlooms and a picture of a woman who looked extraordinarily like Haruhi, "Is this your mother?"

"Yes. She died when I was younger, so I learned how to cook, clean, and take care of the house when I was little. It is hard not having her around, but I have managed this far." She tilted her head and smiled at me, setting two cups of tea on the small table in the middle of the room and sitting. I turned and sat next to her, placing my hand on her small, soft one.

"I can usually tell when a student of mine has lost a parent in some way or another. They tend to withdraw from other people and feel forced to become solely dependent on only themselves. You're different though in some way. I think it is the way you see other people and try to get to know them on their terms." I took my hand off of hers and wrapped it around the teacup, bringing it to my lips and inhaling the sweet warmth coming from the steam.

"Sensei…"

"How many times have I told you, call me Kate. Besides, isn't Sensei usually used only for martial arts teachers?"

"If you think about it grammar is a sort of martial art. It has to be practiced, there are techniques for everything, and the practice of it can sometimes lead to an untimely death!" Ranka's voice sounded from the front door. I blanched at the site of his very form fitting red shirt and jeans. Who knew that a man could look like a crimson haired super model.

"Hey Dad, how was work today?" Haruhi asked, getting up and making her father a cup of tea. I watched him pull her into a hug, kissing the top of her head sweetly as he told her all about a few of the clients that came into the bar that day expecting way more physical pleasure than his work did.

"I can't believe some people. We aren't a brothel, just a place where men can gather in an atmosphere of mutual difference."

I snickered at his words as he continued to fuss over Haruhi. I looked down at the teacup, its thin porcelain enough to let the warmth out, coating my hands as if they were in a blanket. Father, I thought before squeezing and breaking the cup in two, the hot coffee pouring onto my white skit.

"Fuck!" I screamed, "Oh I'm really sorry Mr. Fujioka, Haruhi. Shit…I'm sorry again. I am just so clumsy I…"

"Come on dear; let's get you out of that ruined blouse and skirt. I think I have just the thing for you." Ranka grabbed my arm and practically dragging me out of the room. I whispered a soft "sorry, so sorry" to Haruhi on my way past her.

I am such a fucking fool sometimes. Usually I try and watch my language around students, but it always seems to come out. It really was a bad habit that I was trying to break. The first time those words entered my everyday vocabulary I was dating one of those bad boy types. In the end he turned out exactly like my father, and like my father there were parts of our relationship that I just couldn't get rid of no matter how hard I tried.

"Haruhi tells me that you seem to be living in Ouran Academy." Whoa, wait one hot second…Haruhi…tells…living…Ouran…shit.

"Um, I, uh, I…well…yes" There really is no need to deny it Kate. They pinned you. They figured you out. You can live in shame. The linguist who stayed holed up in a high school because she couldn't read or write the language of the country she was teaching at.

"Dear me. Haruhi was upset when she figured it out, she actually thought about telling that Host Club of hers. It would interest you to know that Kyoya has figured it out as well, but don't you dare tell my little Haruhi that I have been keeping tabs on her school life or I will spread nasty rumors about you. Here you go!" I felt like Ranka's mood changed from sad to boisterously happy to admonishing…it reminded me of someone else I knew. He handed me clean pair of jeans and a black t-shirt then left. The shirt was a little bit too long, which was expected since Ranka probably had at least a few inches on my 5'1", and the jeans were a bit too small on me, but regardless, it fit well enough.

"I'm sorry Haruhi. I will replace that teacup once I get money." I said once I entered back into the main room, placing my hands on Haruhi's shoulder and leaning down so that my face was staring into hers, "I'm really sorry."

"Stop overreacting Sensei. It was just a teacup." She smiled again. So cute!

I nodded my thanks and stood up, grabbing my bag from the floor of the kitchen where I had dropped it. Haruhi had already put on a coat, so we were both ready to go shopping. We bid goodbye to Ranka and headed to the supermarket, stopping only once in order to exchange my last hundred dollars for Yen.

"So your father told me that you figured out my little secret." I stated as we walked through the meat section, picking out some chicken for dinner that evening.

"Kate-sensei, why didn't you just tell someone your predicament. If my dad and I had more room in our apartment we would offer you a place to stay, and I know that if Kyoya-sempai had something to gain by letting you stay he would have asked you to stay. It is just probably a good thing that Tamaki-sempai doesn't know." Haruhi was trying to make me feel bad about not letting someone know that I needed help. It wasn't as if she didn't struggle with the same thing. She and I were alike in that way, independent to the point where we felt that we didn't need anyone to help us. The only thing that was different was that I knew I didn't need anyone. As much as I envied Haruhi's relationships with Tamaki, Kyoya, Honey and Mori, and even the twins, I knew that I could never intertwine my life so inexplicably with theirs as she had done.

"I don't need anything. It will only be until I get my first paycheck and then I will look for an apartment for myself. I've already been looking at places within walking distance to the school." I smiled at her. Lies! All lies. I did want to get my own place, but my first paycheck wouldn't be enough to put a down payment on any place around the school, let alone the apartments Haruhi and her father lived in. All of it just seemed way too hard. I shook my head as she walked into towards the dairy isle to get some milk for her own family, and I looked down at my hands shamefully.

What the hell was wrong with me? I never thought so much about myself, my situation, or my past in one day before. I felt tears sting the back of my eyes, but I blinked them quickly away. I don't cry. I haven't cried since I was eleven, and I don't want to ever cry again. Crying for other people may be fine, but not for me. I'm not weak, I'm not helpless, I'm not with him…anymore.

IIIII

"What do you mean dance?" I asked Tamaki as I handed back his Phrase and Clause worksheet on Friday morning. All of the Host Club, Haruhi included, had gotten each of the questions on the worksheet 100 percent correct. It astonished me that they, especially the Twins and Tamaki, were as intelligent as they were, because they definitely didn't seem like the brightest crayons in the box.

"Why Princess, it is a very fashionable event that the Host Club is putting on. One lucky female student will receive a special award from yours truly." Tamaki answered gaily, swinging one of his legs over the other in a flawless display of grace and perfection. Disgusting.

"Ame-san, are you going to come dance with us?" Honey looked up at me from his seat, his cheeks coloring slightly and his eyes getting bigger and bigger with expectation.

"I don't know. Even though it is Friday night I am probably going to be grading papers or reading a book. I don't really have much taste for frivolity." I could see both Haruhi and Kyoya staring at me. Both of them knew that I would be on campus, both of them knew that I would probably love to join the human race again at some point, but a dance with a bunch of high school students was not my thing.

Fridays always tended to last a little bit longer than other days of the week, mainly because it was the beginning of a time when you can breathe and do something for yourself. I would be stuck at Ouran all weekend, but it was true what I said to Honey; I did have a lot of grading and reading that I could catch up on.

I took a long shower after classes were finished for the day, thinking that I might go to sleep early tonight when I heard the waltz music from outside in the courtyard. I stopped to look out the large bay windows as the entire student body was dancing below me, the seven members of the Host Club shining like bright diamonds from among all of the gowns. What a bunch of schmoozers.

Shaking my head, a raw smirk on my lips, I unlocked my classroom door. As I opened the door, I noticed a strange figure lurking over by the windows, staring down at the students below.

"Who the hell are you!" I screamed, holding the top of my robe closed with one hand as I pointed at the strange shadow, my other hand pointing shakily at the figure.

"It's nice to finally meet you Kathrin Amendier, or can I call you Kate?" It was a man. A strange man was stalking me! Really, when things go wrong they really begin to go wrong. I was in a strange country, set upon by a strange group of young men who were my students, having awkward flashbacks and emotions that were unpleasant to deal with, and I sure as hell did NOT need a creepy stalker.

"I know who the hell I am, but who the hell are you!" I screamed again, frozen in that spot.

He turned towards me and I could see his face. Deep grey eyes looked at me as the man's lips curled into a shining smile. He had long black hair that was pulled up into a horse-tail, and I swore that I could see a little touch of crimson where the florescent lighting was shining on his head like light from the heavens.

"I'm not particularly the most mannered person. My name is Kutano Hisugawa, and in the eventuality that I get to call you Kate, you can call me Kurt." He cocked his head to one side, nodding slightly before turning back to the window.

I grumbled as I stepped into a closet, searching for the clothes that Ranka had given me earlier. In the darkness I scrambled around, only to notice that there were no pants, skirts, or shirts left in my clothes closet. All that was there was a dark emerald satin strapless dress.

"I'm going to murder those twins." I grumbled to myself as I slid the dress on. Hikaru and Kaoru were going to be destroyed. I had already told myself that one day I would get them back, but now my revenge would be much sweeter than I had believed before. Damn those Hitachiin twins. Damn them to hell.

I opened the door, only to stumble out and fall flat on my face on the floor in front of me. Suddenly I felt the warm, firm grasp of Kutano Hisugawa's fingers pulling me up.

"Are you alright Miss Amendier?" He looked me in the eyes and blinked, seeming to be startled by something he saw.

Great, just fucking spectacular. Of course those evil twins would pick out a color dress that matched my eyes perfectly. Emerald green, I looked like the Wizard of Oz.

"Just call me Kate." I tore my arm from his grasp and stomped over to the window. As I looked down at the ball I could see the girl I had helped this morning, Kanako, dancing with another young man. They looked like they were happy. Watching them would have been so much more fulfilling if I didn't see two identical looking heads looking up at the window I was standing in. Is it illegal in Japan to kill students? It probably is. Damn.

"Kate…that is a pretty name. I'm sorry if I scared you, I just wanted to come and introduce myself. Besides, your classroom has the best view into the courtyard, and I wanted to see this celebration for myself." Kutano walked up beside me, placing a hand on the wall and leaning into is as he glanced outside.

He was making me uncomfortable. Invading my space. Not to mention he was semi attractive and I could feel the "geek" vibe coming off of him, especially since he was wearing beige dress pants and a pink polo shirt. Some casual Friday wear should be kept in that Jason Mraz song.

"Next time you want to introduce yourself can you not act like a creepy stalker?" I spewed out the words through gritted teeth.

"I'm really sorry, again, truly very sorry." He turned his head from the window to look into my eyes, his long horse-tail swinging off of his shoulders and landing neatly behind him.

"Would you stop saying you're sorry already. I get the point." I held up my hands as I admonished him, pushing myself away before tripping on an old rotten banana peel and landing square on my ass. I heard Kutano chuckle to himself before extending his hand to me. Grasping his hand I pulled him towards me instead of pulling myself up, making him trip and fall to the ground next to me.

Now what? And again, what the hell was that about? Kathrin Amendier you go too damn far sometimes.

"Anyways, Kurt, apology accepted. Now would you just watch the stupid kids and just shut up?" I stood and turned towards the window, crossing my arms. I was flirting with a strange man who had somehow gotten into my classroom and seemed like a creepy stalker…flirting…me… WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH ME!

"Well, Kate, I actually was wondering if you maybe wanted to dance, considering we have the music right now." Kutano had gotten up off of the floor, dusting off his pants before holding out one of his hands to me.

For some reason I couldn't help but think that this was planned somehow. Shrugging I ignored the fact that those damn twins had something to do this, ignored the fact that the day had been one mood swing after another, and began to dance, focusing on the stormy eyes I was gazing into, eyes filled with nothing but kind intensity.

A/N – So third chapter, two reviews. Thank you KageNoNeko for being a regular reviewer, your advice and support is greatly appreciated. I also would like to thank those of you who are reading this fic, and would encourage you to let me know how you think it is going for you. Comments, criticisms, praises…just send them my way.


	4. What the Hell are They Planning Now

+A/N – Thank you all! I really appreciate the reviews that I am getting on this piece. I forgot to include in my disclaimer last time that I do not own _Bohemian Rhapsody_, which is the song that I used last chapter, and for this chapter I do not own _Its All Coming Back To Me_ by Celine Dion. I hope that all of you enjoy this chapter. Please Review!

What the Hell are They Planning Now!

_There were nights of endless pleasure_

_It was more than all your laws allow_

Goodmorning Celine…why do you have to sing so loud? I stretched out, pointing my toes and straightening my arms above me. Hmn…interesting, I must still be in the dress I had changed into last night. I could feel the satin creating static on my legs. Shit…I knew that I forgot to by something at the drug store. Letting out a sigh I turned on my side.

_Baby, Baby, Baby_

Why was I on the floor? Slowly I opened my eyes, barely being able to see as I sat up an yawned. I rubbed my eyes and came face to face with none other than Hisugawa, Kutano Hisugawa.

"Shit!" I screamed, shooting myself away from the man sleeping on the cot, my back running right into my bookcase, dislodging all of the books on the top shelf so that they came falling down on top of me. "Ow…fuck!"

I stood up, the books that had fallen on top of me falling on the floor with a clunk. I cringed.

_When you touch me like this  
And when you hold me like that  
It was gone with the wind  
But it's all coming back to me_

Oh shit…no way…no way did THAT happen last night! I began to pace, nearly tripping over the dress before getting the idea to heave it up to my waist. What happened last night? I remembered taking a shower, coming back into the classroom, getting legitimately freaked out when I saw some strange man in my classroom, flirting with strange man, and then dancing with said man. No way did I…not at my work…not at a _school_!

"Okay, get a hold of yourself Kathrin. You are an adult. Even if one thing led to another then…" Shit, shit, shit, fuck, shit, shit! How could I let this happen? I remembered dragging him to the cot, that would explain why he is there now, but how did I get on the floor?

"Jerk!" I stopped pacing and walked over to Mr. Hisugawa and, extending one of my legs, kicked his ass out of the cot. I watched his eyeballs roll under his closed eyelids. To think that after all that had probably happened to us (yes, I am still unsure that anything happened but, hey, all of the sensual pieces fit), I was the one who got kicked out of the bed. Oh hell no!

"Ouch…my head feels like it just got stomped on by a hippo." Kutano Hisugawa groaned as I stood next to him. Oh hell no. He was not going to complain about his head when he was the reason my back hurt. Oh shit…my back probably didn't hurt _only_ from sleeping on the floor.

"A hippo? Wait till you see what I am going to do to your head." I yelled down at him, leaning down on the floor and smacking him in the face. He opened his eyes, his grey ones meeting mine. Hmn, well, at least he was pretty, so if THAT happened last night it wasn't a _complete_ waste of my time.

_The flesh and the fantasies  
All coming back to me_

"Kate…what are you talking about?" He looked up at me, his grey eyes confused. I was not going to fall for it Mr. Hisugawa.

"Do not dare address me so informally you fucking idiot!" I screamed at him, pushing him down as I began to pace again.

"Hey, watch your language." He propped himself up with one arm and proceeded to stand up. I stopped my pacing in order to watch him as he tottered back and forth a little bit before falling face first onto the cot, uttering a pained "Ow" as he landed on the mattress.

_I can barely recall  
But it's all coming back to me now_

"Are you okay?" I ran to him, sitting on the edge of the bed, placing his head in my lap as he turned over onto his back.

"My head hurts really bad."

His head hurts really bad? Not even "badly?" Honestly if you plan on making the moves on a high school English Grammar teacher you better use an adverb instead of making "bad" an object of the sentence when there is no linking or to be verb. Honestly, why does everyone speak like total Neanderthals?

"All I remember is falling…I don't know what happened after that." He spoke, rubbing his forehead, his eyes glossed over in what seemed to be pain. As I looked down at him I noticed small flecks of blood underneath his nose. The blood vessels in his eyes also seemed to be a little bit more irritated than normal.

Uh. Oh.

_If you forgive me all this_

Wow…for someone who is as book-smart as I am…I am really stupid. Idiot. Moron.

_If I forgive you all that_

We were dancing. I am a klutz. He tripped over my foot. His nose decided to make a dent in my desk. He decided to become unconscious. I dragged him over to the cot. I cleaned up his bleeding nose. I realized that there was no phone in the room. I realized even if there were a phone, 911 may not be the emergency number in Japan. I curled up on the floor in the poofy gown and fell asleep.

I am a HORRIBLE person!

_We forgive and forget  
And it's all coming back to me_

"Uh…Mr. Hisugawa…I uh, kinda, uh, tripped you. Totally accidental of course. Well, and, you kinda were knocked out and, uh, I kinda panicked just a bit." I curled my bottom lip into my mouth, biting on it until it turned white.

"Ah, that makes sense. I remember meeting you, I just have no idea what happened the rest of day." He looked up at me. For a second I thought of Spiderman the movie, and how Tobey Maguire kissed Kirsten Dunst upside down because that is kind of what it looked like when I was looking down on his head resting on my lap.

"Must have made an impression." I grinned down at him. Stupidity must be my middle name. If not I should make it part of an alias because I felt like crawling into my own little corner.

_And if we…_

I reached behind me and clicked off the Ihome and cradled his head in my hands as I got up from the bed, transferring his head to the pillow once I had completely stood up.

"You did. Don't worry. I don't think I've ever spent a night quite as eventful as last night. Did anything happ…"

"Nope, nope, definitely not. Do you want some tea?" I quickly said, moving over to the microwave in the corner of the room that was sitting on a small minifridge. I took two coffee cups that I bout with Haruhi out from one of the shelves on the bookcase I had run into previously, taking out a large bottle of water from the fridge, pouring the contents into the cups and placing a teabag in each mug. There was silence in the room except for the pounding of my heart and the hum of the microwave.

Damn me. I really go too far sometimes. I should _never_ trust my instincts. They are usually wrong…completely wrong. Well, not all the time, just right now. My gut was right about those demonic Hitachiin twins. I convince myself that they are the real people at fault for this. Those two and their scheming, they were going to get it one of these days.

"I feel like last night I was a little bit stalkerish…I'm sorry." I heard him say as I pulled the mugs out of microwave and carried them over to the cot. I helped him sit up and turn, sitting next to him myself.

"That is better than me. I automatically assumed that when I woke up this morning and you were right next to me that we had spent the night fucking one another…and…"

"Do you always curse like that?" He interrupted me then took a sip of his tea.

"My father was big into curse words, and a guy I dated in high school was too. The similarities between those two were endless." I rolled my eyes, taking a sip out of my own mug. The steam from the warm liquid caressed my nose, providing to be highly relaxing.

"What happened?"

"You could say that I dropped them both cold. You could also say that they both dropped me. Neither story is really very pleasant to talk about."

"Then we won't talk about it. I had a wonderful time last night, well, until I apparently knocked myself out."

"No, it was my fault. I'm the clod."

"That isn't how I remember it; you were very light on your feet, beautiful even"

I saw him smile out of the corner of my eye and could feel my cheeks flush with heat. Not only was this guy attractive, he seemed like a total sweetheart, and he called me beautiful. No one except my mother had ever called me beautiful.

"Mr. Hisugawa, Miss Amendier?" A dark voice called from behind where Kutano and I were sitting. Slowly I turned around, only to be met by a pair of glasses, glinting in the florescence of the lights.

"Kyoya, what are you doing here?" I stood up, smoothing out the satin dress that I was still in. Again, damn those twins.

"I came to return your clothing. Actually the twins came to return your clothing, I am merely making sure that they do not end up in detention and ruin the Host Clubs investment in their twincest. I do hope we can come to some arrangement?" A cold shiver ran up my spine as he spoke, pulling out his black notebook, writing down a small note and then flipping it closed with a snap.

"Kyoya, nice to see you. I haven't seen you the beginning of this year. Have you decided not to be a member of the Physics club?" Kutano Hisugawa said, reaching out his hand to Kyoya who looked like he smirked (I could be wrong about that though).

"We're sorry Kathrin-san." Both Kaoru and Hikaru said at the same time as the carried all of my clothes into the classroom, hanging them up in the closets they belonged in. The two of them were giving me hellish grins. They still could not be trusted. Even if I couldn't give them detention, there would be payback somehow.

"So, now I suppose everyone knows that I live here, huh Kyoya?" I asked, turning back towards the black haired teenager who just grinned (again, can't be entire sure about that) back at me.

"Not necessarily" Kaoru, no Hikaru, said to me.

"Kyoya-sempai usually leaves out important 'need-to-know' information until it becomes ironic to do so." Kaoru, no this one is Hikaru, echoed his twin. Damn I wish I could tell the difference between them.

"That must be a wonderful plot device." Kutano shrugged and nodded his head in approval before blinking his eyes sporadically and falling backwards onto his ass.

"Hikaru, Kaoru, would you please escort Mr. Hisugawa to Music Room #3. One of my family's physicians will be there to attend to his concussion."

"How did you know that he had a concussion?" I asked, helping Hikaru and Kaoru lift the older male off of the floor. Kyoya looked at me from out of the side of his glasses, sending another shiver up my spine, "You know what, nevermind. I'm just going to get dressed now. Don't look"

"Why would I, I have no interest in something that gives me nothing."

"Rude" Geez, what was this guy's problem. He was as colder than dry ice stuck in a container of dry ice, cemented in a block of concrete in the bottom of the Arctic Ocean. I shook my head a climbed into a closet with a pair of jeans and a grey long-sleeve shirt, wrapping a scarf around my neck and curling my shoulders upward, momentarily snuggling my chin into the scarf. My mother bought this for me before I left for Japan. It has a very tapestry-like pattern, and it was a very large scarf, very warm.

"Hurry up, Miss Amendier." Kyoya's voice was patronizing. Imagine the gall of a student of mine being patronizing. I had heard the students calling him the "shadow king" before, but it wasn't until this moment that I knew what was going on. The fact that every single time he opened his mouth my spine rattled beneath my skin was an indication.

"So, is there a reason why you were at Ouran Academy on a Saturday and just conveniently came with a doctor for Mr. Hisugawa?"

"Well, either it is a plot device or it is the fact that the Host Club has monthly Saturday meetings for progress reporting and such, and the fact that we are rich and can do most anything that we desire."

Damn him.

"Besides, I knew that the twins had pulled a prank on both you and Mr. Hisugawa. I just feel that a little bit of surprise towards the end of the evening could be good for business. By the way, since you are indirectly the person responsible for Mr. Hisugawa's injuries you are indebted to the Host Club 20,000 Yen. Either you can work that off or pay it off once you get your next paycheck, which I believe should be direct deposited to your account this afternoon sometime."

"How the hell do you get off…I have an account?"

This was news to me. And how the hell did my student know all of this. Am I that pathetic as to not know this or did Kyoya have some mysterious talent for being the god of Ouran Academy?

"Each teacher is given their own private account that is overlooked by Ouran to make sure that they do not maintain any other paying positions while working for Ouran Academy, just as each student is monitored so that they do not hold a job while in school. It is a system that works effectively."

"Okay…" This kid knew way more than he needed to know about anything. I was usually drawn to incredibly intelligent people, myself being one, but Kyoya's intelligence was on a whole different level. It was frightening, very frightening.

"By the way, just to inform you because Mr. Hisugawa probably did not, Kutano Hisugawa is the Physics and Basic Mathematics teacher at Ouran Academy, which is why he has been wanting to speak with you since you arrived. An even greater reason is, as you have no doubt gathered, he speaks fluent English because he held a job at NASA as an aeronautical engineer, so you being from America is of great deal of interest to him."

"And you know this how?" Damn this Kyoya was a know-it all. He took two of his fingers and pushed his glasses up his nose, either not hearing my question or ignoring it completely. I vote for the latter.

The rest of the walk to Music Room #3 was silent and awkward, but at least it was silent. I was already exhausted. What with my stupid misunderstanding and the sudden entrance of the Host Club into my life, nothing could go even more wrong or drain my strength even more.

"Ame-san!" I heard Honey's voice and soon felt him as he jumped up, wrapping his arms around my neck and spinning me around. As he let go I fell back, only to be caught by Mori's strong arms.

"Thanks Mori."

"…"

I shrugged at the tall hosts grunt as I spotted Kutano and smiled. Did I really actually just smile? Oh fuck, my mind is getting too out of control for me to handle sometimes.

"Welcome Princess, I hope that you…"

"Can it Suoh. Really, it must be hell inside your head all the time." I walked past Tamaki who soon crawled off into his dark corner. Truly I felt that I should probably be nicer to him, but he was really easy to pick on. Gay and charming yes, but I have never really ever liked blonds and I am probably never going to start.

"Hey. So the doctor says that I have a mild concussion and I was curious about something." Kutano asked as soon as I sat down next to him. Really, why were men so awkward. Either it was Kyoya sending shivers up my spine with his CIA intel or this Kutano guy being so incredibly sweet. Mommy, how did I get myself into this situation?

"Uh, shoot." I said, allowing him to ask whatever he was going to ask.

"Well, Kyoya mentioned that you played volleyball in high school, and I usually play in a volleyball league Saturday nights, but with this concussion I am kind of banned from playing."

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, back up that train a bit conductor. How did Kyoya know that…nevermind. Yeah, I would do that for you." I shrugged. I did play volleyball in high school. I wasn't particularly good at it; I was just forced to play it in order to prove to my mother that I could do something other than be extremely nerdy, but I enjoyed playing.

"That would be awesome. I can pick you up tonight then, and don't worry, I will be with you. I wouldn't leave you alone with strange people. But because you are doing this for me, I will pay off your debt to the Host Club."

My ears perked up at this thought, and I could have sworn that I saw Kyoya's head lift slowly from where he was typing on his laptop, but it would be nice to not have to pay my first wages to my students.

"No, I couldn't let you do that. I am the reason that…"

"Shhh," Kutano pushed his fingers to my lips to shut me up. Really I can't say that I haven't been told to shut my mouth before, but never in such a flirtatious way before, "Don't worry about it Kate. I'll take care of it."

I blushed and looked down at the floor. Out of my peripheral vision I thought I saw three heads turn my way. Tamaki had emerged from his corner to join the two twins. I watched as the twins and Tamaki began to whisper to themselves. I sighed heavily. Today was going to be a very long day.


	5. I Can't Believe That This is Me

I Can't Believe That This is Me

"Thanks for letting me borrow your clothes again, Ranka." It was lucky for me that I had made friends with a tranny, especially since I am not only a klutz, but also because I wasn't going to have the rest of my wardrobe until 1) I would be able to afford an apartment and 2) My mother brought the rest of my clothing out.

I saw Ranka chuckle at me as I grudgingly pulled on a pair of brown sweatpants with a matching short sleeve hoodie.

"Damn, I really need to lose some weight." I looked at myself in the mirror. The pants were a bit tight and the hoodie barely zipped around my chest, damn fat sacs.

"Don't talk like that, dear. You are beautiful just the way you are. Come on and hurry up; you don't want to keep your man waiting." Ranka stuck out his tongue and winked at me before throwing me a washcloth and a small sports bag. My man…my man? No fucking way _that_ was going to be said. Just because he was sweet, I flirted with him, and I thought that we had had sexual relations does not mean that there was any type of ownership between us. The love boat had sailed past me in high school, and I bid it a fond adieu, adios, sayonara, and Lebewohl without any regrets.

"You look nice in that." Kutano tilted his head to the side and smiled as I walked into the room, setting my bag next to his feet and sinking down to the floor. I nodded and leaned back, my head hitting the wall.

"Doesn't she? She is quite a gorgeous woman. Look at those elegant curves. I wish that I had that womanly of a figure!" Ranka stuck his tongue out at me one more time, and I glared at him. He just continued to look at me with that "You know I got you, didn't I?" grin.

"Yeah, but against your own wishes you have a penis." I snapped, rolling my head forward to make my glare at Ranka more profound.

"Kate, not in front of Haruhi. Honestly, your mouth…" Kutano shook his head. I wasn't entirely sure if I was being reprimanded because the curve of his lips made it seem as if he was laughing at me.

"Yes, Kutano, what about her mouth?" Ranka prodded as he picked up a cup of tea that Haruhi just placed down, drinking it, his eyes twinkling with the hilarity he got out of his own joke. I took that moment to kick at him under the table, the cup of tea spilling and getting all over the table. Looking towards my right I saw Kutano's cheeks fill up with color. I would NOT give Ranka the satisfaction of blushing. It was not worth enough biological energy to make my cheeks swell with blood like a cherry blossom.

"So, Kutano, when are we heading to the gym?" I asked, trying to get the conversation started in a different direction.

"Please, just call me Kurt." He curled his lips upward, ignoring the redness he should come to his cheeks as he looked at me.

"Pet na…" Ranka didn't have the chance to finish his sentence as I slammed my fist down onto Ranka's hand, which was outstretched on the table. Redness began to show on the skin almost immediately, and Ranka went back into his bedroom, pouting.

"My father can get carried away sometimes. Don't blame him Kate-sensei; he is just a very emotive person that likes getting into everyone's business." Haruhi gave me the cutest grin; it made me want to just leap across the table and snuggle her to death.

"That is probably the way he shows that he cares. His way to always be there for you." Kutano, damn, I mean Kurt said, lifting his mug off of the table and taking a sip. I couldn't help but feel my lips turn in an upward crescent as I stared down into my own mug, the clear liquid illuminating my green eyes. My heart began to pound as I realized something.

My eyes looked happy.

I tuned out the conversation that Kurt and Haruhi were having as I stared even deeper into liquid. I had always heard that the eyes were the windows to the soul, but what were mine showing? Everything that I knew to be true in my own life had somehow begun to change dramatically. I had been having strange mood swings, remembering things that I had tried to repress so much that they only served to make my soul even more rotten. For some reason, I felt like the floodgates were opening and that the rotten crap was suddenly coming up.

Nobody here knew me, yet how could they care about me? I had only been in Japan for a few weeks and I was already flirting? I was already borrowing clothes from a ruthlessly nosey transvestite? I had an ongoing battle with twin terrors way past the terrible twos? I had befriended a sweet and innocent girl that reminded me of…

"Kate, are you ready to go? I have been talking with Haruhi so long that the time just seemed to fly by." Kurt had stood up and was looking down at his watch. I looked down at mine, realizing that I had spent over twenty minutes in my own personal haze.

"Thanks Haruhi, and tell your dad that I am sorry about his hand." I shrugged as Haruhi giggled, then I followed Kurt down to his car. Honestly, I was surprised when he led me down to a pick-up truck once we had left Ouran and Kyoya's medical personnel had said that it was alright for Kurt to drive. Now we were headed to the same pick-up, but with a new destination.

Like a gentleman he opened the door for me and I jumped in. My mind is still obsessed with all of the deep contemplations of my past and of what the hell is going on at this school and with these people that is unlocking all of my deepest fears, desires, and shames.

"Are you okay?" Kurt asked, placing a hand softly on my shoulder. I wiggled out of his touch, nodding.

"Yeah, I am just getting into the game spirit. I'm ready to go kick the shit out of the other team!" I lied.

"Language."

"Oops, My bad." Really? Was he going to do this every single time I let lose a curse?

"So, Kate, tell me something about yourself." I looked at him out of the corner of my eyes, folding my hands together and placing them in my lap, and then shifting my gaze out of the moving pick-up.

"Depends. How much has Kyoya let you in on?" I heard Kurt laugh. It was surprisingly warm, a deep tone that brought a smile to my face. Something about the way people laugh says something about them. Take Haruhi for instance. I've heard her giggle, and when she does that she nods her head down, bring it back up quickly and closing her eyes. Her cheeks redden and it is probably one of the most adorable laughs I've ever seen. When I laugh, it doesn't last a while, it isn't cute or funny. There are probably two or three sounds made while I curl up my mouth slightly, but nothing lasting. Kurt's was warm and hearing it made me feel as if I was in bed under my favorite quilt, resting comfortably.

"Well, Hikaru and Kaoru told me your educational background. I'm surprised that you couldn't get a job after getting a masters degree from Stanford. Isn't that supposed to be one of the top Linguistics programs in the US?"

"It is, but with the economic crisis not very many schools are hiring teachers, let alone a teacher that would have a higher paying salary than a teacher coming right out of college. One of my professors hooked me up at Ouran. Apparently he had had dealings with the Chairman before, and put in a good word."

"I'm glad. Ouran is probably better off for having you come and teach."

I couldn't seem to make this guy out. He seemed like he was completely sincere, but something about that type of sincerity turned me off. Actually, all of the people I had met since coming here seemed completely sincere, even the twins. To be honest, it frightened me a little bit. It wasn't as if I hadn't met anybody like this back in the states, maybe it was just that I had pulled myself away from everyone at home and now that I was in a new place…I don't know! I don't understand.

"So, what is your favorite color?" I woke up from my thought process as his question woke me up from my internal monologue.

"Uh…color? Probably green. Pine needle green. What is yours?"

"Gray."

"What the hell kind of an answer is that? Gray isn't even a color, it's a shade. Who in their right mind would choose that as a…"

"Language…and I like the metaphor of it. Each shade of color has its equal shade of gray, with gray there is no such thing as black or white because, really, they are only opposite shades of gray. I like that. I'm also quite partial to rainy weather, and I love the color of the clouds during a thunderstorm."

"Sorry…I guess that makes sense to me. Even with the rain idea you could make a metaphor out of it: every cloud having a silver lining and all that jazz." Despite myself I grinned, thinking about what he had just said. No such thing as black or white. I didn't believe that, but it was an interesting idea.

"Don't be sorry. Most people react that same way. They say that I am unbelievably optimistic person and just shrug it off, probably thinking that I have never suffered, which is partially true. Someone once said that suffering was like a gas and humans were like tubes, no matter how big the tube or how much gas, the gas always would fill it up equally. It doesn't matter what we've been through in life, each human being has experiences pain in the same way. The logic of pain gets skewed because people create a point system that says that a sibling's death is more painful than breaking up with a significant other, when each can be equally as painful depending on the person."

"Viktor Frankl said that in his book. I remember reading it in college. I guess if that is your worldview it goes along well with the gray idea." I responded. Again it was a beautiful thought, but I though more in black and white terms. How could someone who broke up with a boyfriend or girlfriend ever measure their pain against someone who had lost a sibling? It couldn't happen. I would be fucking pissed off if some ditsy teenage girl came up to me and told me that she could relate to me because she had felt pain over her loss of the star football player, or whatever. It would piss me off to no end.

"You're quite a cynic, despite your flippant personality." I stuck out my tongue at his comment and turned back out the window. I heard Kurt sight beside me and then his shirt rustle as he turned on the stereo.

_I saw a newborn baby with wild wolves around it_

_I saw a highway of diamonds with nobody on it_

_I saw a black branch with blood that kept drippin'_

I could feel water well behind my eyes as I heard the English words coming from the speaker's midway through a song. Bob Dylan. I remember reading a short story by Joyce Carol Oates called "Where Are You Going, Where Have You Been" about a serial killer in Tucson, Az. My professor played this exact song in order to talk about the absurdity of the world. The world was absurd. I knew that. I knew it a lot more than I wanted to.

_Heard the song of a poet who died in the gutter_

_I heard the sound of a clown who died in the alley_

_And it's a hard, it's a hard, it's a hard_

I remember buying a copy of this song after I had listened to it in class that day, a cover done by Jason Mraz because, as much of a genius Bob Dylan was, he was not a vocalist that I could enjoy listening to.

_It's a hard rain's a-gonna fall_

"We're here. Are you ready to play?" Kurt put the car in park and turned off the engine, clicking off the song midway through. Sluggishly I opened up the car down and got out, Kurt grabbing the sports bag Ranka had given me from the back of the trunk, stuffing a bunch of volleyball pads into the bag.

"Let's get-r-done!" I said in my best Larry the Cable guy impression, forcing a smile onto my face as I grabbed the bag and swung it over my shoulders. As we walked into the gym there were people with different color t-shirts, one set of people with yellow shirts and another set with brown. Ah, I see what Ranka was getting at. How did he know?

"Hey guys!" Kurt yelled and waved towards the yellow team. Oh well, I guess Ranka wasn't as in tuned as I thought he was. I looked around at the people on the yellow team. There were six of them already assembled, five guys and one girl.

"If you already had six people you didn't need me." I said through my teeth at Kurt, forcing a smile once the team circled around me.

"League rules say that a team needs to have seven players, one person rotates out every side-out. I thought you played in High school?"

"I did, but we always made do when our alternate wasn't able to make it. Hello everyone!" I said boisterously as the circle enclosed around us.

"Hey Kutano, who is this and why aren't you in your team shirt?" A large man, probably over 250 pounds, addressed Kurt, slugging him on the shoulder.

"Well, certain events that will remain unspoken at this point have led me to the point where I have a concussion and cannot play volleyball for fear of a more extensive head injury. Thus, I have sought to overcome our team's utter loss of my volleyball prowess by enlisting the help of a new teacher at my school. Her name is Kate. Be nice."

Oh great. Anytime you had to tell someone to be nice to a newcomer, everything was going to go downhill from there.

"My name's Hotaru. I'm the captain of this team so you get to follow my instructions. You're going to be out first, not gonna let you ruin the beginning of the game for us, pretty one." I glared at Kurt as Hotaru nicked the underside of my chin with his fingers before throwing me an extra yellow shirt. Fighting the urge to snap back a string of English curse words at the man I unzipped the brown hoodie and put on the yellow shirt. Ew, yellow looked horrible on me.

"Let's hope that you can play. I'm Yuuka. I saw that you came with Kutano Hisugawa, don't think that a foreigner like you could ever mean anything to him, apparently you don't know him well enough yet to know to stay away." The woman, Yuuka, was obviously a bitch. Complete bitch the way she sidled up to me, whispering in my ear. Her voice was sweet, but she acted like she was so superior to me.

"Thanks for the advice," I grinned maliciously at her as I spoke, "twiggy." I finished, mumbling it behind my breath. The back of my neck felt hot and I could feel the hair on my arms stand on end. If the bitch was ready for a smack down then I was going to give her one hell of a time.

I walked over to the side of the court as the brown team was getting in line. Yuuka was playing on the left side of the court. Thank God she would be playing opposite me; I didn't need to accidentally trip her and break her fucking neck. Wow, that was mean. I go from depression to anger, well, what the hell; it's game time.

"Rei" I heard the man serving on the other side of the court cry before throwing the ball in the air and smacking it. It came up short of the net and Hotaru jumped, spiking it down over the net and getting solid floor.

"Come on Kate, show us what you got!" I was rolled the ball from the other side and I picked it up. The ball felt good underneath my fingers as I moved into place, smacking the ball towards the floor.

"Yay, Ame-san!" I heard a squeal behind me. Oh hell no! Joining Kurt on the benches was Honey, Tamaki, Mori, Hikaru, Kaoru, Kyoya, and Haruhi. At least Haruhi didn't look to happy to be here, at least she hadn't planned coming to watch me.

"Who brought kids here?" Yuuka screamed, looking backwards and glaring right at me. I shook my head. Now was no time to get distracted. I hit the ball once more towards the floor.

"One-zero."

"What?" About half of the members of my team questioned. I rolled my eyes, "Ichi-rei." I saw the rest of my team nod before they turned around and got in their positions. I threw the ball in the air and smacked it. The ball got just enough topspin to fly back towards the back row but hit the ground just at their ankles. The perfect slider.

"Holy shit." Hotaru hissed, turning around to look back at me, shaking his head before looking forward, his head still swaying back and forth.

"Ni-rei," I yelled once the ball was rolled back to me, tossing it in the air. This time it was hit by a rather tiny male on the other team, volleyed over to the man next to me who bumped it to the setter. It went over after Hotaru spiked the beautiful set that was given to him.

"She's really good, isn't she Takashi?" I heard Honey say behind me.

"…" Mori not-say.

"Well it isn't that much of a surprise Honey-sempai," Kyoya's voice popped out. I grabbed the ball and stood next to the line, staring towards the other side of the gym as I listened to whatever information the black haired know-it-all was going to say about me, "Kathrin Amendier's team went all-state that year, and even went to nationals. The only reason she didn't play during college was because she had hip surgery the summer before and couldn't make it to tryouts."

"Damn kid." I grumbled, backing up.

"Aw hell, we've got a jumper!" I heard a girl from the other team yell to her teammates. Fuck, I was gonna blow this game wide open.

"San- rei." I took three running steps forward, jumped, and smacked the ball as hard as I could. It hit behind the back row, just inside of the lines as I landed on the ground. My next serve hit the net; I didn't want to make this a fifteen-zero game as so many games ended up in High school when the first serves of the game had me serving. I was known to be aggressive, mostly because I had enough aggression to take out. I lied when I said I wasn't good, I am very good and confident in my skills. I'm good because every time I hit the ball I pictured my father's head or my ex's head. Aggression pays.

We won the first game, and at the match point of the second game I stuck out my foot, legally, the ball flew up in the air, and Hotaru slammed it over the net. We won. I soon felt myself being slapped on the back, an "Atta girl" here and a "go team" there. Kurt, and the rest of my little following, crawled down the stairs and congratulated me.

"Lucky game. Good thing that Kutano will be back next week, we barely squeaked out a win that second game, right Hisugawa?" Yuuka grabbed onto Kurt's arm, brushing his hair behind his back. Oh…hell…no.

"Yuuka, hands off. I'm not interested. I've _never_ been interested." Kurt said, grabbing her arm forcefully and pushing her away.

Game.

Set.

Match.

"Hey, Kate, why don't we go grab something to eat."

"As long as their serving alcohol, I'm up for it!" I pumped my fist into the air before bidding everyone else on the team farewell.

"Come on, let's leave them to their own plans." Kyoya said, slyly fixing his glasses with his middle and pointer fingers.

"But Kyoya, I want to go with Ame-san and Hisu-san." Honey's eyes got bigger, small tears swelling up in the corner of his eyes, his lip curled.

"Mitsukuni. Amendier and Hisugawa will both be at school on Monday, they want to spend time alone right now." I blinked as I heard Mori actually say a sentence, a sentence! Oh happy day. I wonder what would happen if I asked Mori to do a linguistic study on him comparing his speaking and writing styles with one another and then comparing it to his psychology. I wonder if he even would let me do that. I doubt it, but it wouldn't hurt to ask.

IIIII

"Kate, why didn't you listen to me when I told you to stop?"

"Baye toll you that baye hab a berry high acohall toverance"

"You only had one glass of wine, how can you call that tolerance at all?

"Bayem sawy. Bank you."

"Just get some sleep."

"Nighnigh!" I sat up as soon as Kurt left and turned on the light, moving towards the window so that I could watch him walk out of Ouran. I acted like a fool. Why?

"Because you were scared. Because he got too close to the truth during the car ride, and he got too close at the restaurant, grabbing your hand and wanting to talk about why you seemed upset today. Damn him. Damn you." I cried out loud, slamming my hand against the window. For probably the thousandth time I felt like crying but choked back the tears.

"I'm such an idiot." I turned and went to my desk, feeling something move inside my pocket. That was right, after we had left the restaurant Kurt had stuck something in my pocket. I reached in and pulled out a small cell phone that was buzzing. I opened it and saw that there was a text message from him.

I KNOW WHAT YOU WERE DOING. I WONT ASK WHY, BUT IF YOU NEED SOMEONE TO TALK TO I AM HERE FOR YOU. THIS IS YOUR NEW PHONE. I PROGRAMED IN MY HOME AND CELL NUMBERS, THE FUJIOKA'S HOME NUMBER, AND KYOYA'S CELL PHONE NUMBER. I CANT PROMISE THAT HE WONT GIVE IT OUT TO ANYONE ELSE.

I flipped the phone closed, smiling to myself. Apparently I wasn't as good of an actress as I thought. Maybe it was time to tell someone and finally be able to let myself connect with people. Maybe not. This way was safer.

A/N – So I know it isn't as happy go lucky or funny as some of the other chapters, but I needed some actual plot development in here somewhere. I am hoping to make the next chapter funnier and have more of the Host Club involved. Either way, I will post eventually. Review if you have any comments, questions, epiphanies or if you just want to share your thoughts. Thanks!


	6. Blah! I Am a Kraken from the Sea

**Disclaimer: I do not own Ouran, nor do I own "Tell me that you're alright" by Motion City Soundtrack, nor do I own the movie Juno.**

A/N – So if you like this chapter please please please review! Reviewing helps me make better chapters because you can tell me what you want and what worked for you and didn't. Thank you to KageNoNeko for being an awesomely amazing regular reviewer. I also want to thank azaleacroncs and CrippledSoul for giving me some feedback as well. Have a great day y'all and see you in the next chapter

P.S. - I tried to do the less than three heart thing after Honey's messages but Fanfiction wont let me, so I guess imagine little hearts or flowers or whatever there. Sorry!

Blah! I Am A Kraken From the Sea!

_Tell me that you're alright,_

_Yeah everything is alright.  
Oh please tell me that you're alright,  
Yeah everything is alright._

Damn those evil and disrupting bastards. I knew that it was Monday, and really my alarm was going to go off soon anyways, but why me? I got up and grabbed the phone from my desk and opened it, reading another text message.

AME-SAN! 333 ITS SO EXCITING THAT YOU HAVE A PHONE NOW! ITS MONDAY! ILL SEE YOU IN A FEW HOURS! LETS PLAY SOMETHING FUN IN CLASS!333

Honey. It was hard to be mad at someone so small and cute, but it was easy to be aggravated when you were woken up over an hour before you actually had to be up. Grudgingly I went back to the bed, placing the phone next to my Ihome and snuggling back into my covers.

_Tell me that you're alright,_

_Yeah everything is alright.  
Oh please tell me that you're alright,  
Yeah everything is_

Bastard.

IN CASE YOU NEED IT.

I swear, if Mori had said this out loud I would have been dumfounded that he knew that many words. I know that he is a bit…silent…but if it weren't for the sentences that he comes up with for his homework I wouldn't know that he could even speak any words in any language. Now, back to sleep.

_Tell me that you're alright,_

_Yeah everything is alright.  
Oh please tell me…_

Grrrr.

WAKE UP! WAKE UP! WAKE UP!

There was going to be retribution. The twins were going to pay. I feel like my desire to destroy them is getting a little bit old, but one day Kyoya won't be around protect them, and then I will make my move and get my revenge _Princess Bride_ style: My name is Kate Amendier. You killed my sleep. Prepare for detention. At least their phones had their names on it and maybe that meant that since Hikaru was texting me now, Kaoru wouldn't.

_Tell me that you're alright,_

_Yeah _

What now!

SORRY IF I AM WAKING YOU UP, BUT I WAS WONDERING IF YOU STILL NEEDED ME TO TAKE YOU TO THE POST OFFICE TODAY. IF YOU DO WE COULD ALWAYS MEET UP AFTER THE HOST CLUB AND WE COULD BEGIN YOUR JAPANESE LESSONS. IS IT OKAY IF MY DAD COMES TOO?

Haruhi was adorable, so I wasn't mad at her, and it was going to be great that we would go to the post office and begin on my reading and writing lessons. I would be continuing my education and finally make progress for living in Japan. Heaving a sigh I put the cell phone down again and lay on my stomach, smashing my nose into my pillow and stretching.

_Tell me that _

SINCE YOU HAVE NO DOUBT RECIEVED A MYRRIAD OF TEXT MESSAGES OR CALLS THIS MORNING, I WOULD SUGGEST THAT YOU PUT YOUR PHONE ON SILENT WHILE YOU ARE SLEEPING AND MAKE THIS MORNING AN EARLY MORNING. FOR YOUR INFORMATION, HISUGAWA-SAN BELIEVED THAT YOU WOULD ENJOY THE SONG SELECTION, SOMETHING ABOUT COMPARING THE WORDS TO HIS MESSAGE TO YOU LAST EVENING AND IRONY. SEE YOU IN CLASS MISS KATE AMENDIER.

Kyoya…you evil son of a bitch! I shoved the phone under my pillow and kept pushing it. Suffocating it and then slamming my hand down on my Ihome so it turned off my alarm before it started singing too, getting up and going to the Ouran showers. I took the quickest shower of my life, ferociously shampooing and conditioning my hair. It probably would have been just as effective as being hosed off in the front lawn.

After finishing I headed back towards the room, walking against the walls and in the shadows so that if anyone was walking in the hallway they wouldn't be able to see me in my bathrobe. As soon as I slipped on a very sleek argyle black and white silk shirt and a pair of black gauchos, courtesy of the twins I am sure (I feel like I remembered them bringing in more clothing than I owned that morning when I woke up next to Kurt).

"Damn, I look sexy!" I said to my reflection in the window. At least the twins weren't all bad, and I guess I would have to thank them about this someday, especially if Kutano Hisugawa and I met in the faculty lounge for lunch like we had planned. Oh shit…I totally made a super nerdy teacher date fantasy in my head just now. Epic fail at trying to be cool, Kate. Epic, nerdy, uncool fail.

Shaking my head I sat down at my desk and printed out the attendance sheet for the day, chewing on the back of my pen out of nerves when suddenly I received a most brilliant idea. I began feverishly cutting out pieces of construction paper, running down to the faculty workroom in order to laminate the masterpiece of work that I had cut out. Basically I ran through the students that had arrived at the studio and pulled a John Travolta in Saturday Night Fever as I turned the corner and slid on my stockings.

"Good-morning Miss. Amendier!" A voice called as I turned into the faculty workroom, spinning back around to meet the chairman face to face. I cleared my throat and stood up a bit straighter. I hope that he did NOT see me run down here like I was racing in a marathon.

"Good-morning sir!" I bowed in order to show my respect. I hadn't seen the chairman since he told me that I could live at Ouran, but I was surprised to see how young and youthful he looked as he smiled at me, stifling a chuckle.

"In a hurry aren't we? You even forgot to put on shoes."

"Heels are hard to run in, besides I have to get these laminated before class starts." I waved my hand goodbye and entered the faculty workroom, running to the laminator and laminating the construction paper magnificence that I was going to use.

"May I come observe what you intend to do with these?" The chairman asked me as he leaned against the doorframe and picked up one of the placards that I had finished laminating. I nodded and we began to walk back to the classroom.

"Chairman, I really appreciate you letting me stay here since I have nowhere else to go. I'm planning on moving into my new apartment after the next payday, so I will be out of here." I smiled at him and hugged the laminated paper to my chest. He had done me a great favor, "Once I get my apartment I would like to invite you over for dinner, if that is okay?"

"You have no need to be so generous. Ouran Academy is here not only as an academic refuge for our students but for our teachers as well. Though, if you insist, I am sure that my son and I would be delighted to join you for a meal."

"Your son?"

"Yes. Tamaki is my son. I am sure that you noticed by now that we have the same last name. He loves both of your classes and is never short of complements for you." I blushed and shook my head that I hadn't known that Tamaki was the chairman's son. I would have to start being nicer to that boy. Really he was an idiot, and besides him being extremely interested and talented in English grammar and in linguistics, Hell was definitely going on inside of his head. Yet, it was nice to see that I was having _some_ impact on students other than Haruhi, and I think she was having more of an impact on me than vice-versa.

As we entered the room I noticed that Hikaru, Kaoru, and Haruhi were already there, talking to one another in their respective seats.

"Good-morning, estudiantes!" I grinned at the Haruhi and the trouble twins, "Could you all do me a favor and make four columns with all of the desks with enough space in between to run comfortably between them." I saw the three of them look at one another before shrugging and beginning to move the student desks. I sat at my desk, watching the chairman go and sit in the back of the class, hidden in the shadows of the corner and then marking each student on the attendance seat as they came in. I waited in anticipation, seeing Honey brandish his little arm in a wave as he sat on Mori's shoulder, walking in right at the exact moment that the bell to begin class started.

"Alright, let's get ready to go. We've been learning about the different types of phrases and clauses, so I figured that instead of doing a comprehensive test we should play a game." I paused for effect. They tell you that in teacher school. Even if you don't get the response that you desire, even for me the only ones who made any type of acknowledgement of the idea of a game were Honey and Tamaki who both pumped their fists in the air and grinned like little children.

"Anyways," I grabbed the papers that I had hurried to the faculty workroom to laminate and gave a set of six to each of the four rows, "Each team is being given six cards that say phrase, clause, adjectival, prepositional, adverbial, and nominal. Your team is the column that you are sitting in right now. I am going to say a phrase or clause and the first person is going to run up to the blackboard and stick both what the group of words is, a phrase or clause, and what part of speech that it takes the form of. In the case of a prepositional phrase you can label it as adjectival or adverbial for extra credit points. You will earn points for how fast you get it on the board for a total of 8 points per question. Ready?"

I watched all of the students shake their heads. Team one, the team closes to the door, had no chance of winning and the only way team two could hope winning is if Kaoru was on his game today. Team three was probably going to win because it contained not only Haruhi, but also Tamaki and Honey, who were not bad at English. However, with Kyoya, Hikaru, and Mori on team four it was going to be a close game.

"Ready, First question: 'In the middle of the night' –On your mark, get set, Thundercats are go!" All of the students looked at me warily. Clearly none of them had seen _Juno_, one of my favorite movies of all time, oh well, "I said 'Go'" All of the students in the front nodded before shuffling through the six placards and racing up to the board to place them up there. Team 1 arrived first, surprisingly, then team four, three, and two. I wrote down the points, surprised that no one got the extra credit adverbial attached to the prepositional phrase, but oh well.

"Next, 'Who was wearing the red dress.'" Honey leapt over the desk and before everyone else and slapped up both the 'adjectival' and 'clause' signs before anyone else it seemed. Oh shit, Mori quickly stepped to the front and attached the correct answer before Honey.

"Very nice move Mori! Third question: 'The kitty cat.'" Tamaki grabbed a few and ran to the front and placed 'adjectival' and 'phrase' on the board. I was about to make a buzzing sound when he leapt back to his desk and tried to exchange a new placard for the one on the board."

"No way Tamaki Suoh! That ain't no etch-a-sketch. That's one doodle that can't be undid, homeskillet." Once again, blank stares, "Oh come on. None of you have seen the movie _Juno_? Youth is seriously wasted on the young!" Seriously. Just because Japan was another country didn't mean that they should be deprived of awesomeness. I had thought that we were on better terms than to not export one of my favorite movies of all time, and yes, this was important to me because the world revolved around my likes and dislikes. Duh.

The rest of the class went by in a blur, almost as if it was cruising at 90 miles per hour on a bullet train. Team two, Kaoru's team, ended up winning, and I gave them all some tootsie rolls that I had brought with me from the states.

The rest of the day went swimmingly… Isn't that such a great phrase? It makes me think of _Finding Nemo_, when Dori sings 'Just keep swimming, just keep swimming, swimming, swimming.' It makes me happy. Anyways, the rest of the day went swimmingly until the last period of the day, basic English language skills. I taught the class in Japanese, which was difficult since I couldn't write Japanese, but I made it work.

I had finished teaching for the day and was sitting at my desk entering in grades from the game-test earlier that morning when a doe-eyed girl with a horrendously huge and gaudy pink bow in her hair.

"Have you ever seen the Anime Uki Doki Memorial?" The doe-eyed girl asked me. I think her name was Renge. The name 'Renge' means lotus, like the flower, and is a sign of femininity, ultimate femininity. Not only did this girls head look like a giant lotus blossom, which was awkward, but she just seemed like one of those annoying girly-girls that you look at above the rims of your glasses and shake your head.

"Yeah, I have seen a few episodes, why?"

"You need to be more like Amber Brilliante, the exchange teacher from the United States. She has such character, the way that she teaches those students and pushed off her abuse of alcohol in order to help the beautiful boys in Uki Doki Memorial to achieve their academic dreams. That type of self sacrifice in the face of depression and addiction is what true teaching should be about! You need more depth!" She yelled at me in her high pitched annoying (fucking annoying) voice. It all ended when she abruptly mentioned that she had to go see her fiancé at the Host Club.

Poor boys, I hope they will be able to deal with Mistress Lotus. I hope she goes after one of the twins…Karma is a bitch sometimes. Then again, she could go after Kyoya. If I remembered correctly one of the characters in Uki Doki Memorial looked a lot like Kyoya, except that the character was much warmer than Dante's ninth circle of hell, and Kyoya was definitely stuck in the ice, deep, deep in the ice.

I shook my head and met Haruhi outside of Music Room #3. Overhearing a bit of conversation from the boys, "Kyoya, she is an Otaku menace!" I swore it was one of the twins; probably Kaoru by the pitch of the voice, but of course there was no way to be sure.

"Having a female manager might not be that bad of an idea, especially one who claims to be an authority on the female preferential mind and is in fact a female who has no interest in any one of us, except for me of course." Kyoya's soulless voice answered Kaoru's. So apparently Kyoya was Miss Lotus's 'fiancé,' no way in hell would that every work out.

"Kyoya-sempai, I have to go. I'll see you all tomorrow." Haruhi said and I heard a couch ruffle, meaning that she was getting up from a sitting position.

"Bye, Bye Haru-chan!" Honey called sweetly.

"But Haruhi! You should stay and help the Host Club figure out what to do about Renge. You have an obligation to stay here and help mommy and daddy figure out what to do!" Tamaki yelled in his melodramatic way. 'Mommy' and 'daddy'? What the…

"I have to help Kate-sensei with something and then we are eating dinner. She mentioned that movie during class and my dad said that he would rent it, so we will probably watch that if you want to come. Sempai, you aren't invited." Haruhi's voice was almost as cold as Kyoya's and I was sure that I heard and audible thump, probably meaning that Tamaki had sunk into his corner. I almost felt bad for him. Key word: almost.

Haruhi and I laughed about her comment as we walked outside to meet Ranka and then went to the post office. It was good to be able to send some money to my mother, especially since she would be coming to visit once I got my apartment. Dinner was nice. I was really liking soba noodles, even though Haruhi made them with just chicken and broccoli because that is all we could afford.

"So Renge is an interesting person. She basically tore apart everyone in the Host Club and made them into people completely different then who they are except for Kyoya, she said he was perfect just the way he is."

"Really? More like the ice man commeth. Definitely not my idea of perfection. She tried to make me into a different person too. She basically came up to me and went all 'Blah! I am a Kraken from the sea!'" Haruhi looked at me quizzically before chuckling (the tinkling bells one) and picked up the movie her dad had rented, giving me the "I know what you were hinting at" smile. Really, it is geniuses like her that make my job as a teacher much easier.

"I've heard that this movie is quite good and really captures the heart of American teenage life!" Ranka sang melodramatically as he floated into the room in my old white skirt and brown shirt.

"Hey! Those are mine!"

"Oh I just had to wear them once darling Kate. The shirt is just so form fitting and the skirt flairs out at all the right angles. Besides, you still have my jeans and black shirt. When I am trying to look like a man those clothes fit my personality the best, and you still have them, but don't worry about giving them back anytime soon…I think we should trade clothes more often!" Ranka was melodramatic, sure, but he had I where it counts and his presence always seemed to make me feel better, and his extravagance always seemed to make Haruhi smile.

In a lot of ways, besides the affinity for woman's clothing, Tamaki reminded me a lot of Ranka. I wonder if Haruhi saw that. I wonder if the two of them might ever…nah. That was way to Shojo Manga, and I had had enough of that today with the doe-eyes lotus.

"Come on dad, Kate-sensei, stop bickering and let's watch the movie." I laughed as she pushed both of us out of the kitchen and into my classroom where I had rolled a couch against the blackboard and arranged my laptop into our own private entertainment center. The movie began and I was as excited as a kid at Christmas. It was even better that it was in English since both Ranka and Haruhi spoke enough English and, fortunately there were subtitles just in case.

"When I see them all running around like that I always picture them naked even if I don't want to, all I see is pork swords" Juno Macguff mentioned on screen, or on laptop I should say.

I heard Ranka burst out laughing, "Pork swords…haha…it is so true though! Everytime I pass a jogger I can't help but undress them with my eyes, even if I don't want to!"

"I know right!" I sighed, leaning into Ranka a little bit more. I really didn't know why, but when he put his arm around me I felt loved and safe. No man had ever made me feel like that. I knew that I didn't have any actual feelings for him, how could I…no offence, but Ranka wasn't my type.

"I'm going to go get a glass of water from the kitchen; you have no more in your fridge Kate-sensei. Anyone else want anything?" Haruhi asked and then left when the two of us declined her offer.

"I…oh…I'm sorry, I didn't mean to catch you guys…I'll go now." I heard a deeply familiar voice say from behind where Ranka and I were sitting. This looked hella bad. Oh Holy night!

"Oh, Kutano, I'm glad you got my text message saying you could come and join us." I panicked. He was looking at the ground. Part of me wanted to roll my eyes at him and tell him to grow up and grow a pair, but the other part noticed the way his shoulders slumped and his eyes avoided looking out way at every cost, "Kurt…"

I was about to say something when Ranka got up and walked toward Kutano.

"Just because I married a woman once upon a time, doesn't mean that I don't bat for the other team the majority of the time. I'm a tranny, and she does nothing for me." Ranka whispered into Kurt's ear, just loud enough for me to hear before slapping the physics teacher on the back hard enough to send him flying to the couch, "See ya, Kate. I'm off to work. You two make sure to not to do anything in front of my daughter and ruin her innocent eyes!"

Kurt chuckled nervously before moving towards me and sitting next to me, acting as if I would bite him for being stupidly male. Truthfully, even though male stupidity gets to me sometimes, it is mostly endearing and adorable when it is directed at you.

"Hey, Kate, I just remembered that I have a huge test tomorrow so I am going to get my dad to walk me home before he goes to work. By the way, he said to give you this." Haruhi grinned at me, her huge adorable hazel eyes sending me telepathic messages as she tossed over a bottle. As I caught it I read the label (it was in English, would I have lied all this time just to get people to help me out, please, I am not that kind of a woman): Premium Sake. This was good stuff, this was the stuff rich businessmen were given on business trips to bring back to the states and get drunk off of. I looked over from Haruhi to Kurt and then back at Haruhi. Oh hell no! Not this whole song and dance again…it was not going to end up like that, with it "all coming back to me now" early in the morning.

"_Juno_. I love this movie!" Kurt said, noticeably scooting a little bit closer to me. Oh like I didn't feel that? Come on Mr. Physics-genius-man, you need to be more smooth then that, or you might as well open with the line "Do you take karate cause your body's kickin'"

I opened the bottle of Sake and took a swig. I'm sure that if Renge could see me now she would be having the time of her otaku life!

_Tell me that you're alright,_

_Yeah everything is _

I smacked my pocket, getting rid of the noise as Kurt smirked sinisterly beside me, flipping his horse-tail to the other side of his head. Oh yeah, you think it is ironic, don't you mister tact?

HI AME-SAN 333 TAKASHI AND I ARENT GOING TO MAKE IT TONIGHT TO THE MOVIE. I PROMISE WE WILL RENT IT AND WATCH IT SINCE YOU LIKE IT SO MUCH. THANKS FOR THE GAME TODAY; IT WAS FUNNN 333

I snapped the phone shut, setting it to silent, and rolled my eyes. Good, who needed them to show up. Honey and Mori probably had familial obligations to attend to, or decided to go to a movie or study together. It was Monday, they needed to do their homework…right? I took another swig of Sake.

_BZZZ_

SINCE HARUHI ISNT THERE ANYMORE THEN THERE IS NO POINT IN US COMING.

The twins, really, am I not as good as Haruhi? I felt Kurt put his arm over the back of the couch, his fingers slightly brushing the back of my neck and sending shivers up my spine. No, No, No, not happening, not fucking happening.

_BZZZ_

ENJOY YOURSELF THIS EVENING MISS AMENDIER, AND DON'T FORGET TO CHECK THE PROOF ON THAT SAKE. YOU DON'T WANT TO SHOW UP TO CLASSES TOMORROW WITH A HANGOVER.

How did Kyoya know that…wait a second. I looked down at the proof number and printed right under it I saw it. "Complements of the Ootori group"

"Fucking bastard!"

"Language!" Kurt smacked my thigh, sending shivers up my spine again. Damn men and their stupid male penises.

"I'm sorry. I just keep figuring out that I am a naïve bi.." Kurt scowled at me, a very Snape-like scowl, "bizznitch"

"No, Kate, you just need to find more balance in your life, something that can keep you afloat when it feels like you are drowning." Damn man. He was so right and yet he was the one sitting next to me, his body heat radiating on my side like a…you know what no…not doing this. Not thinking it here, not thinking it now, not…no.

"I just need a little cheese to my macaroni?"

"Yeah, exactly. Just something extra to jazz up your persona. Your character is a little flat." I turned and looked him in the eyes, his gray ones bright with laughter and mischief in them.

"Silencio, old man. How old are you anyways, come to think of it."

"31 and still bringing sexy back." Almost six years older than me…not that bad.

"Was that a Justin Timberlake reference?" I grinned, looking down at my hands as I wrung them together before I looked up, leaned forward and touched my lips to his. Who would have thought that mindless banter and a cheesy Timberlake reference could have made me do this. I was going insane. But really, who wanted to think about possible neuroses when Kutano Hisugawa's lips were so soft, and he was kissing back, which you could say is a plus. I guess I won't worry myself thinking about it until I come up for air.


	7. How Did I Get Caught Up In This

A/N – Thanks all of you that reviewed last chapter including KageNoNeko and Nina. I would really like it if everyone that enjoyed the chapter could review and give me some feedback, even if it is criticism…I don't mind. The song in this chapter is "Riot" by Three Days Grace and I hope that you all enjoy this chapter. See you in the next one.

How Did I Get Caught Up In This

"Boss? Kate? Hisugawa-sempai?" I heard two voices say. My neck hurt like hell, and I groaned before opening my eyes. All the filled my sight was two pairs of eyes and two extremely arrogant and amused smiles. Shit. Kaoru and Hikaru. Damn those twins.

"What are you two doing here?" I lifted my right arm in order to wipe away the sleep from my eyes. What was the last thing that happened last night? I remembered watching the movie with the Fujioka's and then, oh yeah, and then Kurt came in. My hand shifted from my eyes to my mouth. I remembered now. There was a total make out session on the couch until…

I tried to lift my left arm but something grabbed onto me. Looking over, my eyes met golden hair and the profile of someone's face smashed onto my shoulder, their arms grasped around my arm like it was a teddy bear. I'm pretty sure he was even drooling.

Tamaki.

Looking down I saw Kurt's head using my lap as a pillow, his legs hanging off of the couch in awkward positions, almost as if they were broken.

"We're here early for class. It's Tuesday morning." Kaoru said. His voice was slightly higher when he spoke alone. I was getting good at this game.

"Tono must not have gotten the hint of Kyoya's text message saying to leave you and Hisugawa-sempai alone." Hikaru responded, the two twins grabbing one another in a side embrace and grinning mischievously at me.

"So…what happened?" The troubled twins glared down at me, leaning over towards me so that their faces were only inches away from mine.

"Nothing!" I jumped up off of the couch, Kurt and Tamaki's heads flying towards one another, inevitably smacking against the others. Neither woke up. How the hell could neither one of them have woken up?

Moving to my desk I figured it would be a good moment in my life to pause and think about things. I have been in Japan, what, a month or so and I had found myself a bunch of crazies to complement my crazy. No one, and I mean no one, that knew me in high school or college for that matter would have ever thought that these types of people would ever be interested in me or would even appeal to me as acquaintances. No one would ever believe that I would have even had the balls to kiss, nay make out, with a guy who is actually a decent human being, let alone a decent person of the male gender. And then, when I think about Haruhi and Ranka…Ranka is like the father I never had, the father I wish that I had, and Haruhi is so much like what I would have imagined…no. No thinking about that today. There is too much else to think about.

"Okay Kate, if you don't want to tell us you don't have to." Kaoru appeared at my right side, his cheek pressing against mine.

"But we can always ask Kurt about it when he wakes up or, better yet, I wonder if Kyoya knows anything?" Hikaru's cheek now pressed against the opposite cheek than his brother's was. The whole idea of twincest is awkward in and of itself, and it is great to know that these brothers really don't do the nasty with one another, but I understand the draw now that I was the filling in between a twin sandwich. I wonder if Kurt has a twin. What? Just because I am a nerdy good-girl doesn't mean I can't have a libido too.

"Kaoru, Hikaru, you are both giving me a headache. Can you wake the two of them up for me please so that when the rest of the students get here it doesn't look like a horrible sitcom?"

"Yes Ma'am!" They said together, standing up straight and saluting me before leaping in the air and landing full force on the completely unaware couple on the couch.

"Holy shit!" Kurt screamed, pushing one of the twins off of him and standing up, ready to bring the smack-down on one of the twins, his faced contorted in a grimace.

"You said 'shit'" I laughed. After all this time thinking that he was some overtly righteous man for always telling me not to curse, he had done it. I resisted the urge to pat him on the back when he pretended to rub his neck. I could have sworn that he squeezed his throat, I could have sworn…

"Sorry. I don't have that much of a filter in the mornings I guess." He chuckled and tilted his head, the same sideways smile illuminating his features. Just to note: I kissed that mouth last night.

"Kao. Ru. Ge. Toff. Of. Me. ." Kaoru was still jumping on top of Tamaki who seemed to be clinging to the couch for dear life until, cushion and all, the two of them came tumbling to the ground in a heap.

"Come on guys," Damn boys, "Classes are going to start in twenty minutes and I need to get dressed!" Damn idiotic boys. They didn't hear me even though I was practically scolding them like a mother.

Kaoru flashed me a grin of complete sadism before grabbing Hikaru and pulling him down with them.

"Oh, great guys, really great." I yelled toward the floor as the three teenage boys continued to be teenage boys, "Kurt, would you please do something?" My eyes were pleading with him to do something, anything to get the boys off of the floor. I caught my reflection in the mirror and realized that I looked exactly like my aunt did when she was telling her husband to deal with something my cousins were doing. Crap…when did that happen, "Kurt?"

"Uh…sorry, you're on your own. I gotta go get ready for a meeting with the chairman that was supposed to start five minutes ago. Bye!"

"Damn you." I growled at him as he grabbed a sweatshirt from the side of the couch and jogged out of the room.

"Language!" I heard his voice echo back into the room from the hallway.

"You guys, stop it!" Tamaki's laughter drew me back to the teenagers wrestling on the floor. Kaoru and Hikaru had the blond prince pinned to the ground and they were poking him in his sides.

"Okay guys, time to get up." I rolled my eyes, figuring that it was time to break them up and get the day started, not that the day hadn't already had a wonderful beginning full of insanity. Then again, if I began to expect a day at Ouran Academy to be normal I would probably need a CAT scan. Reaching down I began to pull the two twins off of Tamaki, grabbing them both around the arms and lifting them towards me.

"No…stop it. Hahahahaha! STOP!" I shrieked when I was pulled down into the wrestling madness. They kept poking my fat and I kept poking back, giggling harder than I had in a while. It felt like wrestling on the floor with my cousins. Thinking that I probably shouldn't be rolling around on the floor with three of my students really didn't occur to me until something else plopped on top of my stomach.

"Ame-san!" I looked up and saw a huge bunny staring at me, two big brown eyes smiling at me between the bunny's ears. Honey now added to the pile of teenagers surrounding me. What were we, in 3rd grade? It was time to stop this.

"Mori! Help me." I called before getting pulled into the air by two strong arms and set safely down on the ground, "Thanks"

"…" Silent as ever, but at least it got them all to stop.

"You all stay out here; I'm going into the closet to change. Don't you dare let anyone into this room, got it?" I made my way over to the closet and opened the door, only to get pulled back forcefully by the two banes of my existence who were holding out a garment bag in front of me, both of them slyly smiling at me. You know, it was the first time that I ever thought of the fact that with the color of their hair and the way it was styled that both of them looked remarkably like little devious foxes. Little teenage fox-looking foxes. It fit rather well. And if they were foxes, I guess that means, unfortunately, that I am the sheep.

As I got into the closet and into the darkness I sighed. I hadn't really done that much thinking about what had happened the night before. Did I feel comfortable with Kurt, maybe even like him or was I just searching for something to fill up my own emptiness? Shaking my head I got into the clothes that were handed to me. Honestly, did those two think that they were my personal fashion merchandisers? Either way, even though I was way too old to having a tickle fight on the floor, something about this place did make me feel comfortable, did make me feel like I belonged. Somehow thinking about it made me sigh again, a deep sigh of gratitude.

"Wow Ame-san! You look so pretty!" Honey ran up to me and looked up at me with his eyes and a very childlike grin. I patted his head, ruffling the russet-blond hair as I made my way to the window, looking at myself. I was wearing a knee-length grey dress, a bow cinching the dress just below my hips, the skirt of the dress pleated. It looked very nice.

Okay. So. To be a total girl about this, if the twins continued to supply me with adorable clothes that hide my stomach and play my curves in all the right ways, I might just choose to forgive them of their devilry. Just saying.

I went to my desk, watching the twins and Tamaki push one another around as they found their seats, and Honey jumping onto Mori's back his small voice laughing as he watched the other three. Haruhi soon came into the room, only to be attacked by Kaoru and Hikaru as she sat at her desk, Tamaki blushing at something the two doppelgangers said. It made me happy to see them all interacting like that, like comrades.

"Kate, I was just wondering what you wanted to do for your birthday?" Kutano's deep voice sounded from beside me. I looked up at him, realizing that he was avoiding my eyes.

"Don't worry about it. I'm probably just going to watch _Beauty and the Beast_, _Of Mice and Men_, and _The Rocky Horror Picture Show_ while chugging down a pint of Phish Food Ice Cream. I saw it at the supermarket the other day and got very excited." His brows furled into a proverbial question mark, and he didn't need to say anything. I knew my movies choices were strange, but they had always been part of my own special birthday tradition since I entered college. One movie was for the person I lost, one was for the person I still had, and one was for the person I hated. It worked for me, it worked very well.

"Well," I cleared my throat and stood, placing my hand on Kurt's shoulder, "I have a class to start teaching, so I will see you at lunch alright."

"Let me know if you need anything. I mean it." He whispered as he placed his soft hand on my cheek before leaving, his fingers slowly caressing my face as he walked away. How could he see right through me?

"Miss Amendier, please accept these flowers for my condolences of that idiot ruining your evening last night." Kyoya Ootori suddenly appeared before me, a vase of lilies held out towards me. As I took them I noticed him take out his black book and jot something down, but then I became mesmerized with the white flowers. They were Easter Lilies, my favorite flower.

"Kyoya, did you know that the lily, in Roman mythology, was said to have originated from the goddess Juno who, as she was nursing her son Hercules, let some of the milk fall towards the earth and once it landed up sprouted these lilies? Also, it is said in Christian mythos that lilies were created when Eve wept for her fall and begged God for forgiveness. Her pain became these beautiful flowers." I bent my neck and smelled the sweetness of the flowers. Lily…beautiful, sweet, pure Lily…living, breathing Lily in Harmony.

"No I did not Miss Amendier. Now I do." He pushed up his glasses and found his seat. Heaving a heavy sigh I placed the flowers on the table and took in a deep breath, counting to ten before heading to the chalkboard.

"Alright. Since you all showed your competency at recognizing phrases and clauses in our little game yesterday, today we are going to deal with sentence types and sentence type analysis. First, does anyone know the four sentence types?" I looked around the room, waiting for a hand to show up and smiling when Tamaki raised his hand, his blue eyes lighting up.

IIIII

"I can't believe you two! I can't believe both of you would not only come into my classroom and disrupt all of your classmates by engaging in an argument during the middle of my class, throwing things at one another like a married couple on the brink of divorce. I swear, if either of you could have found an engagement ring to chuck at the other's head you would have found it. Kyoya will not, I repeat, NOT get you out of this one. You both have detention this afternoon. No Host club. Do I make myself clear?" I ranted and raved at the two lunatics in front of me after class, only the rest of the Host club looking on at me like I was some kind of demon in disguise. I didn't care if my face looked like a Namahage at that moment, I was livid that these two would ever take this shit this far.

What had happened? Hikaru came in sporting new flamingo pink hair. I resisted the urge to laugh until Kaoru walked in with neon blue hair. I thought that maybe the two of them were trying to play a prank on someone until Hikaru reached out his leg and kicked Kaoru's chair out from underneath him. Kaoru then retaliated by knocking Hikaru's chair over. Both of them then proceeded to pick up their own chairs and go all WWE on one another, throwing things at one another. I'm pretty sure that Honey and his stuffed bunny even got caught up in the argument. I came over and told them to cool it or I would give them detention and, to some extent, they did calm down. I figured that they could work their own shit out until someone's notebook came flying at the back of my head while I was writing the days homework on the chalkboard.

And yesterday had gone so well too! I felt like whining and stomping my feet on the floor in a temper tantrum as I thought about the two of them wrestling with Tamaki on the ground, their mouths twisted into symmetrical sinister grins. They all seemed so happy then. What the hell happened? Yeah I wanted to rip out their guts, throw them in a blender and his frappe at times, but it was all in good fun. At least it was, until now.

"You will both come here immediately after the last period of the day gets out. If either of you are late then I will not only call your parents, but I will make sure that I make your lives a living hell of punctuation. You'll be singing the Semicolon Blues before long you twisted little terrors." Yes, it was a little bit harsh, but they had gotten on my bad side.

After lunch Tamaki came into the room and pulled up a chair to my desk where I was snacking on some chocolate chips, his forehead flopping down on the table with a thud. His whole countenance had changed and, despite how annoying he could be sometimes, I really felt bad for the guy.

"Ame-sensei, you don't have to feel guilty for keeping the twins for detention today. I canceled the Host club because of those two. Honey-sempai tried to make them feel better by giving them some cake…"

"I'm sure that that didn't work out."

"No, of course not. Gentlemen are not supposed to act that way. Then they brought my little girl into it and began fighting again, and my beautiful face got pelted with some type of soup."

"I'm sorry Tamaki. I am sure that things will get better. They'll get over this fight and then the Host club can start offering that twincest package again. Kyoya came in earlier looking for a calculator to figure how much the club was going to lose because of this." I felt bad for Tamaki's plight, but shouldn't he be out there trying to do something to help those two get over themselves instead of sitting here wining at me. They were getting detention for their flagrant disrespect of my classroom and myself, so we were even. I didn't care about the stupid club and if that's was what he cared about that was his deal.

"I know what you're thinking Ame-sensei, but it isn't just about the club. The twins have never fought like this before; they've never been apart. I've known them since middle school, and they always kept everyone at a distance except one another. They were so warped back then, never letting anyone into their world. I said to the club after lunch that this fight could be a good thing for them, to get them to realize that they are separate people and that they can work it out together and expand their own horizons, but I'm not so sure."

"Tamaki," His whole demeanor seemed to change in that one instant, going from petulant frat-boy to mature psychotherapist. I didn't know the twins past, but I did see that they had something that I had seen in very few siblings, something I wish that I could have held onto in my past. I knew that it was important to grow into your own person and to realize that you have your own strengths and weaknesses. It took me twenty-five years to realize that, and this boy, no, this young man had realized it at his age. I reached over and patted him on the head, brushing aside his bangs and pulling his head up off of the table, "Tamaki, you are so smart. I know that whatever happens with Kaoru and Hikaru, that they are lucky to have a friend like you to look out for them."

"You really think so! Oh that is so sweet of you Ame-sensei! I knew that you would see things…" And there he went, back to his own charming and obnoxious princely self again, but still, it was nice to know that he was capable of intelligent common sensical thought.

IIIII

_You're not the only one  
Refusing to back down  
You're not the only one  
So get up_

I had my music on and was grading papers, casually and cautiously looking up at the twins who seemed to look up at me at the same moments I glanced up to check on them. Then they went back to whispering to one another. Hikaru was sitting on the chair and Kaoru was sitting on the desk, a large notebook opened on his lap. I heard them whisper and then heard the etching of a pen scratching on paper.

_Let's start a riot, a riot  
Let's start a riot_

"Alrighty, I've had enough of your scheming. You were fighting one another all day and now you are both sitting there collaborating on goodness knows what. What are you up to now?" I saw their amber eyes look up at me, both of the foxes maneuvering themselves toward me. Oh Jesus, please have mercy on me. I gritted my teeth together as the twins reached my desk, both of them glaring at me as if I really was a sheep.

"We'll tell you." Hikaru grinned at me from my left, resting his right elbow on the desk, his face only a foot away from mine.

"If you say that you'll help us." Kaoru picked up from his twin's sentence flawlessly as he sauntered up to my right, resting his left elbow on my desk. Seriously, these two knew how to symmetrically intimidate people with not only their tricky plans but also their extremely physical techniques. They could really teach criminals a thing or two about being sly and suspicious without getting caught.

"What's in it for me?" I asked them. It felt as if I was playing a role in _The Godfather_ and one of the twins was going to burst out saying 'I coulda been a contender' or 'Go to the mattresses' and then take out an AK-47 and go on a murderous rampage.

"Clothes" Kaoru's grin widened as he leaned in a little bit closer.

"And we will stop playing pranks on you and move on to a different target." Hikaru smirked with the same volume and width as his twin and moving in towards me the same distance.

"Deal" Yes, I am so lacking in a moral compass that I will aid two little devils in their own plot in order to be spared any further torture and so that I can get cute clothes. This really did feel like a mafia deal, "What's the sitch?

_Let's start a riot, a riot  
Let's start a riot_

I've sold my soul.

IIIII

"Stop it you two. Stop fighting like this. I just cannot take this anymore!" I yelled at the top of my lungs as the twins and I stood outside of Music Room #3. As soon as Haruhi, joined by the rest of the Host club, opened the door I quickly held out my arms to my sides, one of my hands splayed across each of the twin's chests, "This is no way for brothers to act!"

"Who are you calling brothers?" Hikaru yelled out, tears welling up at the side of his eyes. I could see the glisten of them from my peripheral vision.

"Tamaki, Haruhi, Mori, Kyoya, Honey, I tried to get them to talk about it while they were in detention and then figured that I would walk them up to you guys so that neither one of them murdered the other on their way up here." I panted as I felt the twin's arms punching the air around me, hoping that neither of their fists connected.

"Kate-sensei, is that a black eye?" Haruhi pointed out in her sweet voice. She was so sweet to have noticed, which is what we were kind of hoping for. I nodded as Tamaki stepped forward.

"This is no way to behave, especially to a woman. You both owe Ame-sensei an apology right now. Don't you think this is getting old?" Tamaki raised his voice to what I supposed to be the closest to a yell that he has come to while I've known him. His take charge attitude surprised me a bit to be honest, "Mori-sempai." Tamaki called in that same commanding tone and Mori lifted both Hikaru and Kaoru up into his arms, arching his neck backwards so that the squabbling siblings didn't punch him in the head as he carried them into the music room.

"I'm sorry Ame-sensei." Tamaki bowed to me and I bowed back to show my appreciation before Honey, Haruhi, and himself followed Mori back into the Music Room.

"Here Miss Amendier. This is one of my family's health clinics first aid kits. It should help get rid of that bruise." Kyoya handed me a small medical kit as he moved his glasses up the bridge of his nose, the lenses twinkling slightly. I suddenly realized that when he did that it almost looked like he was winking. He suspected something.

I walked back down to my room, ignoring the stares that I was getting from the few people still in the hallways. As I got into the classroom I closed the door, locked it, and slid down the wooden entrance, my back leaning against the door. Heaving a large sigh I opened the medical kit and took out one of those wet-wipes and began to rub off the black costume make-up around my eye before busting out laughing.

Well played Amendier, well played.

IIIII

A/N - Don't forget to review, review, review!


	8. Time To Say Goodbye

Dedication: I would like to dedicate this chapter to my good friend and roommate who has given me so many happy memories, including memories that have to do with the songs in this chapter. Happy Reading!

Time To Say Goodbye

Thankfully the rest of the week went by without anymore drama. Then again, after the insanity of the beginning of the week I was beginning to feel a bit bored. I kept tapping my pen on the desk and then putting the back of it in my mouth and gnawing on the end while watching the grade sheet stay stagnate on my computer screen. I had inputted, checked, rechecked, and re-rechecked the grades. Then I had gone to the store on campus.

Can you believe that there is a store on campus? It was like college! You could get everything!

Anyways, I bought each student a binder with my teacher credit (these teachers have a huge budget, by the way) and hole-punched their papers and tests, placing them in the binders. Not only did I do all of this in the past two days, but I also used a different kind of font for each student to create labels to stick on the front of their binders. These rich people had everything!

"Kate." I heard from the doorway coinciding with three soft knocks, "Can I come in?" I nodded quickly as Kurt walked in. He was styling a yellow polo shirt, black slacks, and a ruby red sweater draped around his shoulders, the sleeves tide.

"Well you are looking especially geeky today." I smiled as he pulled up a chair to my desk, straddling the back of the chair in the normal male fashion, leaning forward and pecking me on the lips, "I could get used to this."

"So could I," He chuckled. I decided that unlike Haruhi whose chuckle sounded like tinkling bells, Kutano's chuckle sounded like the flow of a steady river. It was nice.

"You always excite me." I said, playfully tapping him on the shoulder.

"Haha, that's what he said!"

"Touché Hisugawa, touché." I was still convinced that my laugh sounded like a train wreck, but really that didn't mean anything in the long run. My mother always said that when I was a child my laugh sounded like a chorus of angels. As I became a teenager I wondered what the hell she was smoking.

"Kate, I know you said that you were content to be alone on your birthday, but tomorrow night I am taking you out to dinner. Hotaru and his wife are coming too. I know you don't know them that well but it is better than spending your entire day alone."

"That's great Kurt, but I won't be alone. I have students all day and then I am conducting a review session for Intro Linguistics, so by the time that is over I figured I would just start watching the movies." I got up and grabbed the box I had placed the folders in, walking around the room and placing each student's folder on their respective desk. I was actually very surprised that all of the members of the Host club were in the top spots, Honey, Tamaki, Haruhi, and Kyoya battling it out for first place. To be honest, Tamaki's interest in English grammar was astounding me. He was continuing to surprise me more and more now that I was seeing the overzealous prince. Then again, all of the Host Club was like a babbling band of baboons (Thank you Professor McGonagall for enriching the life of my generation).

"Look seniorita stubbornness"

"Ooo, 'seniorita,' someone's been crashing my introductory Spanish class."

"Si, Si," I laughed at his horrible attempt at a Spanish accent, "either way Kate, you are coming to dinner, even if I have to kidnap you." He got up and put the chair back, making his way over to where I was standing, kissing me on the cheek before heading out the door. Damn that man. I finished putting all of the binders on the desk and sat back down at my computer and turned on my music, listening to the entirety of "Defying Gravity" from the Broadway musical Wicked while making the beginnings of a rubber band ball.

_So we've got to bring her_

_DOWN_

At the last moment, the last profound and belted note, I lifted my hands in the air. Jazz hands! Yeah, really, I just did that.

Shaking my head at myself I got up and decided to pay the Host club a visit. There was nothing else to do and wasn't it their job to entertain people. Hell, I needed entertainment, even if it came from the likes of them.

I walked through the halls, nodding my head to other students that I had in my class if they were still there. Today I found out Ouran had a football club, an American football club. Spandex-and-large-piles-of-sweating-testosterone-on-a-muddy-field type of football. Wow, what kind of sentence diagram would you have to create to diagram that nominal. NERD!

Again, don't judge me!

As soon as I reached Music Room #3 I met a little boy outside the door who was walking hand in hand with a little girl. It made the mother inside of my heart want to clap and jump up and down and do a happy dance like a complete dork.

"Hey, shouldn't you two be at the elementary school?" The girl blushed…she was so cute! Not as cute as Haruhi, but cute.

"We just had a concert with the Host Club, now we're back on our way over there because they have to plan some birthday thing for some English teacher, don't worry about us sempai." The little boy said as he gave me a naughty-boy smirk at me and pulled the girl off in the direction I had just come from. I blinked my eyes repeatedly at the stark rudeness of his tone, but decided to shrug it off. Birthday thing for some English teacher? How many English teachers as Ouran were there with birthdays in November?

Leaning against the closed door I realized that I could hear everything that was going on. I could barely make out other types of movement, but I definitely could hear their voices.

"Let's make a game out of it Boss" Kaoru, I could tell because of the pitch. I was getting better at distinguishing their voices because Kaoru was in two classes with me, but I could barely tell them apart when they were together unless they spoke distinctly.

"The person who gets Kate-sempai to smile her true smile wins" Hikaru this time. His voice was lower than Kaoru's.

"What do you mean 'true smile'?" Haruhi said in her sweet voice. Great question, Haruhi. I was beginning to wonder what they meant. I smile a lot. I laugh a lot.

"Miss Amendier is pretty distant; it's true. Figuring out her weakness might prove useful." The shivers told me that it was the Shadow King speaking. Creeper.

"It isn't just that Kyo-chan. Ame-san always seems happy on the outside, but I think that she puts up a cage around her heart and doesn't let anyone in." Despite Honey's childlikeness, he was really a very bright young man. I leaned harder around the door and subconsciously placed a hand on my heart, feeling it beat beneath me.

"People deserve to be happy. We make our guests happy so we should also try and make Ame-sempai happy. It is our duty as her students and as members of the Host club. Operation Make the Linguist Smile, code name The Amendier Project has been voted on and approved. Game on!" Tamaki's excited voice shot through my ears like a cannon. I could just see him making frilly hand movements in the other room. Well, at least now I was entertained.

Walking back to my room I decided to sit down and read random Wikipedia articles until I felt like going to bed. Did you know that the little plastic piece on the end of a shoelace is called and aglet and that in the renaissance, using the term le petite mort, the little death, actually meant orgasm. It brings a whole new meaning to the song that has the lyrics "I just died in your arms tonight!" Cool huh.

IIIII _Hikaru and Kaoru_ IIIII

"Wake up. Wake UP. WAKE UP!"

"You two promised me that you wouldn't pick on me anymore" I growled at the dual voiced alarm clock and the fingers that began poking at me through my nice, warm, comfy covers.

"We aren't. It's your birthday so we figured that we would bring you some top of the line Hitachiin fashion designs." Hikaru showed up in the view of my left eye as I only opened that one.

"We helped our mother design them. It took us nearly all evening." I closed that one eye and opened the second, seeing Kaoru on my right. In what seemed like an instant I was up out of bed and sat down in a chair, staring at a clothing rack full of clothes. It was enough to make you cry. They were all my size. I was not only surprised that the twins had this good of fashion sense but also that all of this was for me.

"I should really pay your mother for…"

"Don't worry about it. You're basically a test subject anyways" The two of them said together. I probably should be a bit put off by their comment, but I really wasn't. Mainly because of the fact that I was I shopping heaven.

"We've selected this outfit for your day today." Hikaru pulled a skirt off of the rack and held it up to me. It was a black floor length skirt made of very silky and thin material. He then held out a purple tank top and black shoulder jacket with a flower pattern that matched the color of the shirt very nicely. I looked somewhat like a cherry blossom tree, but I didn't care. The outfit looked hawt…so hawt that it necessitates the misspelling.

"And this is for your birthday dinner." Kaoru said as he stood next to his brother, holding out a little red dress. Seeeexxxxxaaaaayyyy. It was strapless and the skirt flared out together, a black sash in the center and a black shawl draped over the top.

"Hot Damn. You two have some serious style." I grabbed the first ensemble and meandered to the closet and took out my bathrobe, intending to go shower before getting the robe pulled out of my hands and thrown across the room.

"We're doing your hair so sit down." After letting the twins poke and prod at my tender scalp for what seemed like an hour, including what seemed like another hour for make-up application, they pulled a hand mirror out from somewhere and gave it to me. I looked and could barely recognize myself.

"I look fuc…I mean smoking hot." Whew. I may curse like a sailor in front of adults but I really didn't like doing it in front of students. Just for the record, it is NOT because Kutano Hisugawa is in my life. Definitely not.

The twins had not only curled the back of my ponytail but had braided a bit of my hair and encircled my head with it like a crown. How come my hair decides to be stubborn with only me? Not fair. Either way, I remembered the Host club's conversation I had heard yesterday. Their actions did make me smile inside, but I don't think that that was what Tamaki meant about a 'true smile.' I guess I would be the one to know when my deepest desired happiness broke out.

IIIII _Mori, Honey, and Haruhi_ IIIII

Mori and Honey walked up to me in the beginning of class. Mori stood there silent and strong as ever, but Honey was slyly smiling at me with his hands behind his back, rocking back and forth.

"Ready, Mitsukuni." Mori said in his gruff voice as Honey began a rousing rendition of 'Happy Birthday' or 'Otanjou-bi Omedetou Gozaimasu.' During the song Mori placed a small cupcake on my desk that had a 'W' on it.

"What the…?" I picked up the cupcake and looked at the 'W,' flipping it around in all ways. It made me thing of the _Pagemaster_ when the pirate says "It's east by some broccoli." Good times, good times.

I was confused at the gesture until in the next class Mori and Honey came back I was given a cupcake with an 'E' on it and a classroom full of students singing 'Happy Birthday' rather horribly as it was a beginning English class.

In my introductory Spanish class I recieved a cupcake with an 'L' on it and a choral arrangement of 'Feliz cumpleaños.' In my introduction to linguistics class I received a cupcake with a schwa (the symbol for the sound "uh") on it and a very enunciated but surprisingly peppy version of 'Happy Birthday.'

I received the same English version of the song in my other beginning English class with a 'V' cupcake, and with the beautiful and spit educing version of 'Alles Gute zum Geburtstag' from my German class came the last and finale cupcake baring a 'U.' I love you…aw…how sweet of those two guys! Apparently Haruhi had made the cupcakes, I was informed by Honey, but couldn't come to school today because she was sick. Either way, it was the thought that counts.

The smile came, but it didn't feel life changing. Round three guys.

IIIII _Kyoya_ IIIII

"Happy Birthday, Miss Amendier." Kyoya said as he came up to my desk, pushing his glasses up so that they winked at me again, "I'd like to invite you on a little trip to my family's private beach. You can bring Mr. Hisugawa if you like."

"That would be fun, Kyoya. Thank you so much." I gave him a small smile, but alas it was not the smile that was to change everything. Kyoya knew that as he pulled out his black book and scribbled in it, "I'm actually surprised Tamaki isn't participating. I figured he would jump at an opportunity to play a game like this." I gave him my most devious smile. I thought it was awesome because I tried to mimic Kaoru and Hikaru as best as I could, but of course Kyoya and his gynormous brain handled it well.

"Tamaki has a tendency to begin these little games and not follow through if he doesn't know how to win. If you noticed he was answering more questions than normal today. He is appealing to your inner nerd." Kyoya lifted his glasses with his middle finger again and left the room. I shook my head and then closed the door as he left. No one had decided to come to the Intro to Linguistics study session, so I decided to take a nap before changing for the evening.

IIIII _Kutano_ IIIII

"You better be ready in there or I will break down the door and drag you out of there by your hair."

"Sounds kinky. Are there handcuffs involved?" I chuckled at my own joke as the twins finished up the last touch up for my hair and make-up, slinking away to hide behind the desks on the far side of the room. I could hear their little fox-snickering from behind me. Hey, if I can make two people as blatantly insane as those two laugh, point for Kate, "By the way, the door is open."

"Well I dunno if handcuffs are involved but I do have a blindf…wow," He walked in the door and I swaggered up to him, my arms locked behind my back. I glanced at him up and down. A black pinstripe vest and slacks combination with a red long sleeve shirt and tie combo that matched my dress perfectly. He looked like the perfect Asian Mafia man. Smoking hot.

"How come you always manage to look so sexy to me?" I grabbed his vest by the lapels and bulled him in for a hug.

"It's compliments of the Hitachiin twins. Do you like it?"

"It brings geeky to a whole new level." He leaned down and pecked me on the nose. It made my cheeks flush and my whole body feel warm inside like a cup of hot chocolate on a cold winter's day accompanied by the most luxurious blanket, a fire in the hearth, and the tap of rain on the concrete outside. Yes, all of those comforting feelings are what I felt that this moment. The only feeling that was missing was the pot of chicken noodle soup on the stove, but that would be so good it would be like death (pardon the pun).

_Young teacher, the subject of schoolgirl fantasy_

We were in his pickup truck, caravanning to some nameless restaurant. I was blindfolded and that was okay with me. I hadn't been out for my birthday since I was a senior in high school. He was holding my hand and let go only to turn the music on, I supposed, because as soon as the music turned on his hand curled itself around mine again, his thumb rubbing circles on.

"Is this the version from Glee? It sounds like Schu." I asked.

_She wants him so badly, knows what she wants to be_

"Of course it is. I am a total Gleek."

_Bookmark it, she's so close now_

"Me too. Notice how appropriate this song is for our current situation." I felt a peck on my cheek while we reached a stoplight, "Mr. Teacher"

_Temptation, frustration, so bad it makes him cry_

"Except for the fact that you could stand as close to me as you wanted." I could feel the smirk through his words. Oh yes, temptation was a definite thing at this point. It had taken only a week to move this far. Either this means that we are soul makes or desperate. I hoped for the former but really, this is Kathrin Amendier we are talking about.

_Don't stand so…_

"Hey, why did you turn it off?"

"Honestly, if you were kidnapped you wouldn't be able to follow the path of the car in order to try and figure out where we were headed, could you?" I felt him exit the car, finally realizing that we were stopped and the engine was off. Now his comment made sense.

A cold breeze entered the car as he grabbed my arm above the elbow and pulled me out of the car. We walked a few feet before I heard the creaking of the door and the din of many voices. He pulled me forward a few more steps and pushed me down into a chair, taking off the blindfold. The first thing I saw once my vampire eyes grew accustomed to the dimly lit was a goofy looking Hotaru and an extremely pregnant woman standing in front of me.

"Alright, introductions. This is Kate," Kurt waved his hands toward me and I took the opportunity to bow my head, "Kate you already know Hotaru, but this is his wife Shirayuri."

"Yuri for short." The woman was plain looking, but her cheeks glowed with life. It was good to see. Not to mention, she was so tiny compared to both Hotaru's magnificent bulk and the beach ball sized growth protruding from her abdomen. The miracle of pregnancy was not lost on me, but it always amused me when twig-like women had stomachs that made their waist grow to about three times its normal size.

"So what's for grub? You can't just promise to take me out to some strange bar and then not feed me. I'm an American; bring on the bacon!" Was I being snarky? Of course. Was it my birthday? Of course. Point.

"Is she always this feisty?" Hotaru asked, receiving a small chortle from his wife. To continue the continuity of figuring out what everyone's laugh sounded like, Yuri's sounded like a pig. No offense intended, she just snorted a lot as she sniggered at me. Just saying.

"She is either like this or she is manic depressive. Her moods can be quite bipolar sometimes." Kurt added in, acting completely serious even though I know that he was messing with me.

"Ha. As if. I am contemplative, not depressive. Big difference."

"Then you must contemplate a lot."

"When one is as intelligent as I, the mind is the path to nirvana." Yuri was silently breaking out in her snorts while Kurt just looked at me, a huge toothy grin on his face. This was fun.

"Watch out Kate. This man is no dummy. At the age of 10 he claimed to know Pi to the 30th digit." Hotaru pointing a rather large finger at me as the waiter placed a pitcher of beer at the table. All that I had had since coming to Japan was Sake…beer was going to taste awesome! The big man poured me a glass and I put it to my lips. Budweiser.

"Oh yeah?" I asked after taking a sip and wiping away the foam from my lips as I turned to the side and glared at Kurt, "Bring it on, geek."

"You think you can handle this? Nerd?"

"Oh you did not just go there. Let's go." Hotaru reached around his wife's shoulders and pulled her closer to his body as she continued to break out in snorts. I was hoping that her continuous laughter wasn't starving her of oxygen. That would be horrible and my entire fault.

"3.1459265358979…"

"Is that all? 3."

"2"

"3"

"8"

"4"

"Cherry." Kurt was secretly funny. This was a side of him that I really hadn't seen before. It was nice to see him out of the "geek in the pink" mentality and into casual mode.

"What's this?" I asked as the waiter came and brought four baskets to the table, "Oh my fuck…

"Language."

"Oh my frigging goodness! Hamburgers and onion rings! Real hamburgers and onion rings!" I grabbed the burger from the basket and stuffed it in my mouth, the ketchup dropping down onto the table, nearly missing my cleavage. As my friend Carl says, if it doesn't get all over the place, it doesn't belong in your face, "Nom, nom, nom"

"It looks like the girl is pleased." Hotaru noticed as he let go of Yuri and dug into his own burger. Yuri had a chicken sandwich. I decided that I would not judge considering that she was pregnant and red meat would probably be fairly unhealthy for her. Nothing…and I mean nothing…beats a good juicy burger. The charbroiled smell with the meaty goodness inside that, if cooked just right, melted into your mouth. Of course you had to have the true American cheese. No fast food place, except for In and Out, could do justice to a good burger at a restaurant. It is because of this food that I understand why in India the cow is sacred.

"Here, you can have the other half of mine." Kutano Hisugawa's offer cemented the deal for me, right there. It was fate that brought us together, even for this one night of burgerliciousness. (Side note: Did you know that the word burgerlicious was added to some dictionaries? I'm totally serious). I downed his. At this point I was pretty much turning into a heifer myself. What can I say, gluttony is my sin of choice.

"Eat this one too." Hotaru handed over the last half of his burger as well and I greedily took it as he laughed at me, "Forgive me, but isn't that a bit unhealthy?"

"Of course not! This is a well balanced meal. You have your carbohydrates with the bread, calcium with the cheese, protein with the burger and bacon, vegetables with the lettuce, and fruit with the tomato all in one tasty compact sandwich. It's practically a miracle food." My logic was sound and would not fall to their laughter. Hamburgers were ambrosia.

"Kate, now that everyone is done eating, it's time for your actual present" Kurt said as both he and Hotaru stood up and went to the stage at the center of the restaurant. I had noticed people there all night, singing karaoke, but I was so preoccupied with Pi and Hamburgers that I didn't even notice anything until…

"Do you know what they are planning on doing?" I whispered to Yuri. She grabbed my hand from across the table and squeezed it, nodding at the seat that Hotaru had just vacated.

"Shit" I mumbled, getting a glare from Kurt from across the room. How did he do that? It's like he had a cuss-dar.

The music started and Hotaru lifted the microphone to his lips. I had a really bad yet awesome feeling about this at the same time.

"You are my fire. The one desire. Believe when I say 'I want it that way.'" Oh, hell no.

"But we are two worlds apart," Kurt began singing, running his pointed finger across the audience until it rested on me then pulling it back to his chest, "Can't reach to your heart when you say that 'I want it that way'"

"Tell me why!" The two of them began doing scissor moves together, just like the Asian Backstreet Boys on YouTube. I knew I shouldn't have shown Kurt that video.

"Ain't nothing but heartache"

"Tell me why"

"Yuki, can you please tell me why?" I asked the pregnant woman beside me. I thought that she would be laughing hilariously but I could see her rubbing her belly and looking up at her husband.

"Kate, what do you think?

"They're either drunk or tone deaf," I was probably right about the last bit. Hotaru wasn't ear-piercing bad; he sounded like a bear growling in the woods. Kurt, on the other hand, sounded like nails on a chalkboard from a sloth that got shot by a BB-gun. Besides all of that, as I looked at Kurt looking at me, ignoring the people in the audience about ready to throw their beer flagons at the two on stage, and just looking at me with those stormy eyes, I felt happy. Kurt hadn't gotten to the point that Tamaki and the rest of the Host club had tried to get to, but he had gotten a step closer.

The rest of the night passed by seamlessly. I was glad that Kurt had forced me to go out with him, and I was happy to earn two new friends before the evening ended. Everything just felt so right.

"Mr. Hisugawa, thank you for a wonderful birthday to remember." I gave him a kiss before leaning my head on his chest.

"Happy Birthday, Kate. Go enjoy your movies." He pulled me up by the shoulders and I smiled. It was tradition and, despite the desire in my heart to stay with him tonight, there were things that I had to do. I nodded to him and turned around only to be hailed back, "Hey Kate! Don't forget your Phish Food" I turned to him holding out a pint of ice cream with a bow on the top of it. I ran back to him and grabbed it before blowing him another kiss and running up the steps of Ouran academy.

Once back in my classroom I stashed the ice cream in the mini-fridge and moved the couch back into its place perpendicular to the blackboard and set up my laptop in front of it, slipping in _Beauty and the Beast_. I changed into a new pair of silk pajama bottoms and matching button down shirt, courtesy of the twins, and jumped on the couch about ready to hit the play button.

"What the hell?" There was music coming from somewhere. Someone was in Ouran this late at night? Sighing I grabbed a flashlight and made my way down the hallways, following the music. The floating notes brought me to Music Room #3 and I opened the door. A rush of day old petals and the smell of flowers greeted me along with the darkness.

"Hello? Who's here?" I held my flashlight as a club, and like the idiot that I am didn't realize that I would trip in the darkness of the room without the light shining on the floor.

"Ame-sempai, sorry, it's just me."

"Tamaki? What are you doing here so late?" I moved over to where I heard the Host King's voice. He was sitting behind a white grand piano in his pajamas.

"I come here to play sometimes after everyone at home is asleep. Anything you want to hear?" Despite his idiocy and the fact that he is blond, some woman was going to be very happy to win his heart. It was so pure; I was glad that I was getting to know that about him.

"I don't really know many pieces for solo piano. Pretty much all of what I know are vocal pieces." I ran my hands over the wood of the piano. So smooth.

"Kyoya said that you were a singer once upon a time. Do you know 'Time to Say Goodbye?'" My heart stopped, as did my hands that were caressing the wood. Of course Kyoya knew that. He knew everything. This time I wasn't too upset with him though.

"I sung it at a funeral when I was eleven. It's probably one of my favorite songs to sing. I…" Tamaki interrupted my words as he placed his long pale fingers on the ivory and began to play the introduction. His hands mimicked the melody of the orchestrations flawlessly. I looked up to the ceiling and breathed.

"Quando sono solo

Sogno all'orizzonte

E mancan le parole"

I sang for probably the first time since college, apart from the daily singing in the shower. Tamaki's accompaniment was beautiful. He was truly an artist with his fingers caressing the keys in sheer perfection.

"Si lo so che non c'?luce

In una stanza

Quando manca il sole"

The lights of the room seemed to come on in my mind's eye as I stood there with my student. He was there and so was I, but it was not him that I imagined at the piano. There was a girl, a little seven year old girl that I loved, that I knew so very, very well.

"Se non ci sei tu con me, con me.

Su le finestre

Mostra a tutti il mio cuore

Che hai acceso"

Every time I sang this song it reminded me of her. It didn't matter anymore about what I was feeling or what barriers I had build up around myself. It was all Lily. Lily stroking the keys of the piano to make me sing, Lily running towards me and jumping into my arms when I came to pick her up at her classroom after school. She was my best friend.

"Chiudi dentro me

La luce che

Hai incontrato per strada"

Tamaki lifted the foot pedal, his last played note hanging in the air with the sigh-like syllable coming from my throat. I saw all of them gathered around me as I sang, in front of me the small coffin where her body lay.

"Time to say goodbye"

Tamaki kept the beat with his left hand as his right did runs along the length of the keyboard, his eyes closed, the music completely taking over him. I saw his hands shrink into the small, delicate hands of Lily. Messing up and then trying it again, getting frustrated when she messed it up again, trying and trying until, eventually, beautiful music would appear.

"Paesi che non ho mai  
Veduto e vissuto con te  
Adesso si li vivro.  
Con te partiro"

There was an emptiness that I filled because Lily was taken from me. I saw the coffin being lowered into the cold ground as I sang in front of that audience, but it didn't feel right singing to a recording. It wasn't Lily playing the piano for me, smiling at me through her dimples and telling me that I had the voice of an angel, like the ones mommy said were in heaven.

"Io con te." The last note was high, and Tamaki's hands were moving swiftly along the ivory, hitting the last final notes until everything stopped and the only sound was the lasting echo in the music room. I breathed heavily and smiled at him.

"You have a beautiful voice Ame-sensei." He nodded at me and I nodded back, professional music courtesy before turning and practically running back the way I came, slamming the doors of the music room behind me before forcefully backing up into them and crumbling to the ground, my cheeks becoming damp with the rain coming from my eyes. Tamaki began playing the piano again as I wept outside of the Music Room for the first time since that funeral, since I was eleven.

Breathing in deeply I stood and wiped away the salt-water on my cheeks and opened the door once again, "Tamaki, would you like to come watch some movies with me? I usually watch them alone on my birthday but I'd like it if you came to join me. I have an entire pint of Phish Food ice cream and two spoons, what do you say?"

"Phish food?" His eyes became childlike as he tilted his head and lifted his finger to his lips as he asked innocently.

"Come on, idiot. Let's go." I smiled at him as he leapt towards me and we walked back to my classroom.

_Beauty and the Beast_ started, coincidentally it was one of Tamaki's favorite childhood movies. I looked at the blond boy as he leaned onto my shoulder, his mangy teddy bear seated between us.

On my birthday I always watched three movies, one for the person that I lost, one for the person I still had, and one for the person I hated. _Beauty and the Beast_ was for Lily, the person I lost and had to say goodbye to, my best friend in the entire world. My beautiful little sister.

"Ame-sensei, can you pass the ice cream, this is really good. I'm going to have to bring this to the next Host Club meeting. Commoners have everything!" I laughed at his outburst and handed him the pint of ice cream and a spoon.

"By the way, Tamaki, congratulations on succeeding in The Amendier Project." I nudged him with my elbow and laughed as he looked at me quizzically with those blue eyes. Despite this newer sweeter side, Tamaki was still a first class moron. Even so, he was a moron who had the strength to begin breaking down walls that had been in place for a long, long time.

IIIII

A/N - As always, please find it in your hearts to review because reviews mean a lot to me. Also I would like to say that the songs in this chapter are Defying Gravity from Wicked, Don't Stand So Close To Me by The Police but from the show Glee, I Want it That Way by the Backstreet Boys, and Time To Say Goodbye featuring Andrea Bocelli and Sarah Brightman (I got the lyrics from a website, so don't hate on me if they are wrong. There is also a translation guide on that website as well but FanFiction wont let me post the URL) Anyways, thank you all for reading and don't forget to review, review, review. See you in the next chapter!


	9. To the Bat Cave

To The Bat Cave!

The next few weeks went by without any excitement whatsoever. I did the same thing every single day after I woke up: teaching, hanging with Kutano, Hotaru, and Yuri, learning with Haruhi, sleeping. Wash, rinse, repeat. My life was becoming a herbal essences comercial, but it was getting easier and easier, especially since I was learning how to read and write Japanese rather quickly. I had a knack for learning languages, even languages whose primary letters were not roman. But, alas, it was the end of the week again and all of the students had gone home.

"Nobody loves me anymore!" I sighed into my hands after checking my phone and seeing the sorrowful text saying that there were no new messages or voicemails. Seriously, why did nobody love me anymore?

I smiled despite myself. Tamaki had begun breaking the barrier that I had put up, and I allowed him to. It was about time that I allowed people to get close to me. I knew that. I knew that these people had gotten underneath my skin, igniting a flame that I had extinguished a long time ago. No one knew why, no one knew about Lily, and that was fine with me. Opening my heart could only happen by taking baby steps, but I had strength now that I could use to take those steps.

Damn, enough of those life changing thoughts. Corny, super corny. I decided to get up and get dressed in more casual clothes, deciding that it would be a good day to wear jeans and a t-shirt, and to just hang around the classroom reading a book. Most of my books were back at my mother's house and she would be heading out to Japan soon to bring some more of my stuff out, but regardless of what I had left behind I picked up one of my favorite books from my undergraduate days, _Moby Dick_, and went outside to sit at the fountain in the middle of the school.

I was on one of my least favorite chapters, but one of the chapters whose title amused me infinitely: "Of less erroneous pictures of whales, and the pictures of whaling scenes." What the heck would make any picture, let alone a picture of a whale, less erroneous? I mean, really.

It would have been easier to concentrate if I didn't feel like I had a few sets of eyes on me. It was crazy that anyone, especially a student, would be at their school during their time off, but I couldn't help but think that I was feeling something stalking me. I tried focusing back on my book but the feeling was getting worse, especially when I thought I saw two read-covered heads duck behind the bushes. It would be so damn cool if I had a camera in my book like in old spy movies, then I would be able to see whether something was there or whether I was going insane.

The feeling kept getting worse and worse, so I decided to close my book and head back to the room, passing by the flowers on campus.

"What the hell?" I whispered as I thought I saw Hikaru and Kaoru slide behind one of the stone columns on the outside. After a few weeks of just seeing them in class and not worrying that they were going to plan something else insane, it was about time. Walking back to my classroom my heart picked up a little bit more. I felt like it was mission impossible and immediately the movie _The Swan Princess_ came to mind.

"We're out on a mission. We're tough in good conditions. We're short but standing tall. No fear!" I sang quietly to myself as I walked as slowly as I could down the hallway before jumping into the open door to my classroom and shouting, "Gotcha!" I looked around and was surprised that I had seen nothing. I walked into the classroom further. Oh…hell…no! I've been robbed! Everything in the classroom that actually belonged to me was gone. The books on the bookshelves, my laptop, my blankets and pillows. I ran to the closet. No! Even the amazingly nice Hitachiin clothes were gone. I fell to the floor, pounding the ground with my fist.

"Why me!" I screamed, shooting both of my hands up to the heavens, imploring everything to not have happened.

"Don't worry Miss Amendier," a cold voice, Kyoya's voice, called from the doorway. He was standing there writing something into his notebook. I could feel him glaring at me through his glasses even though the glare from the sunlight made it so I couldn't see his eyes. I noticed then that he reminded me quite spectacularly of Madame Defarge in _A Tale of Two Cites_. She was a dark woman who wrote the names of people she desired dead into her crocheting. How could I know that Kyoya wasn't doing the same thing in his little notebook? Perhaps murder was a bit extreme, but maybe, just maybe, he was doing more than jotting down notes for future reference.

"What are you doing here?"

"As I said, don't worry. If you come quietly there will be no need for me to call my family's police force. You wouldn't want that would you?" Kyoya smirked at me. He was a demon. A black haired, four eyed demon.

"Target." I felt my left arm being grabbed by someone and looked to the side, only to let out a small scream when I noticed that Hikaru (possibly Kaoru, but the voice and haircut made it sound more like Hikaru).

"Captured." The other twin had latched onto my right arm.

"Kyoya," the Shadow King flipped closed his notebook and walked out of the room, "I'm going to fail you all!" I screamed as the twins dragged me out of the room and then out of the building, "When I get done with all of you, you will have no hope of going to college."

"Oh come on Kate, you wouldn't do that to one of your students. There is a teacher's code of ethics, even with these brilliant young men." Kutano Hisugawa. So, he was in on this as well.

"Fine, I won't take it out on them. I'll take it out on you. You aren't getting any!"

"I haven't had any yet, and you wouldn't be able to resist. Just cooperate, princess," Kurt grabbed my chin in his hands and lifted it up to his face, his storm gray eyes looking at me from the side. He was pulling a Tamaki; I couldn't believe it; I couldn't believe it was working. Damn you Kutano Hisugawa.

"Fine, you all win!"

"Yay!" The twins jumped in the air, giving one another a high five, until they leaned down, placing a black blindfold over my eyes.

"What is it with you guys and blindfolding me? It's not like I would know where we are going anyways." I asked, sighing. I was sitting in the backseat of a sedan, right in the middle of the Hitachiin foxes, "And would you two stop poking me!" I grabbed for their hands, successfully grabbing their fingers as they tried to wiggle them out of my grasp.

"Really Miss Amendier, everything is going to be alright. As long as you cooperate I think that you will be very pleased. Mr. Hisugawa, could we please try and hurry as fast as we can. The twins and I have somewhere else to be in an hour." I felt my spine shiver at his command, and then felt the car accelerate a little bit faster.

There are moments in all of these times when something happened with these guys where I feel like I have to take inventory of my life. They kidnapped me and I had no idea what was going to happen. I hoped that I knew them well enough to know that none of them were axe murderers or anything like that, but just think about it. The Host Club would be the perfect cover for an operation of axe murderers. They had tons of girls at their disposal, as well as enough beauty to lure them in, and a dark shadow man capable of figuring out the slightest random details about these girls' lives. How were they not worried by this?

"Before you kill me, do I get to ask why?"

"I think you're taking this way out of context, Kate-sensei." Kaoru's voice said from my right. It was a lot easier to tell them apart when I couldn't even see them at all.

"Yeah, we think that you are going to be surprised." Hikaru echoed, nudging me in the side with his elbow.

"Exactly, Kate. Though would you rather die by machete or gun?"

"Ha, Kurt, you are so NOT fucking funny."

"Language." I rolled my eyes at him underneath the blindfold and leaned back into the seat. We traveled for about a total of five minutes before the car stopped and I was pulled out by one of the twins and led forward.

"Watch your step." The twins said together and I stepped up, missing the step completely and falling forward only to be pulled backwards forcefully and therefore falling on my ass. They pulled me up and I felt a pair of hands steady me, their warmth sending butterflies through my stomach. They were Kurt's, and his hands were a feeling that I was getting used to.

"Welcome, Miss Amendier," Kyoya pulled off the blindfold, "to your new home."

I rubbed my eyes, thinking that this must be a dream. I was outside a small cottage on its own plot of land. There were other houses around, but they were not smashed right up against one another like Haruhi's apartment.

"I kept track of your incoming salary and found that one of my family's real estate ventures would be the perfect place for you to reside. Kaoru and Hikaru decorated the inside and I am sure that they would want to show you around; however, we have to be going. Enjoy." Kyoya nodded at me as a man in a black suit drove up in Kurt's pickup truck, switching the keys to the truck with the keys from the black sedan that Kurt still had in his grasp. The three boys left and I turned to Kurt.

"So, do you want to go in?" Kurt threw me a key ring, a cute little calico kitty keychain connected to it.

"Why didn't you tell me about this? I was looking for apartments, you know that." I wasn't mad, but I did want to know. I placed the key in the door and unlocked the home, taking in a breath as I stepped inside. As I walked in I was astonished. There was a beautiful cedar end-table to set things on by the door and a set of hooks for hanging stuff. There were stairs heading upstairs, and a bathroom hidden underneath the stairs. The kitchen was to the right and, as I walked through the archway I saw a beautiful table as well as counters that wrapped around into a bar, a few barstools set up. I walked into the next room and found a beautiful living room set containing a couch sectional that was facing a modest looking TV.

"All of us wanted to surprise you, and Kyoya figured that it was about time that you get out of Ouran, especially since you had the money. Ranka is planning on coming over this afternoon with Haruhi and next weekend Hotaru and Yuri are bringing over dinner. I'll be coming over with them. The Host Club boys might come too." I moved back to the other side of the house, finding the bedroom containing a beautiful queen sized bed and a matching bedroom set.

"Hikaru and Kaoru figured that cedar would be the prettiest wood, and would be more to your taste. I ran my hand across the dresser and looked up at the watercolor painting of lilies.

"Who picked this out?" I reached out and felt the paint.

"Kyoya, actually."

"You don't say. He must have an eye for good paintings." I turned around and sat down on the bed. It was so soft.

"Would you be even more surprised if I told you that he was the one who painted it for you?"

"Kyoya?" I was surprised. Who would have thought that that guy had something less logical and more inspiring in his head?

"I actually wonder why he picked lilies. I know that he gave you a bouquet of lilies a few weeks ago. Are they your favorite flower?"

"No. I wonder why he did." Kurt obviously didn't catch my lie. Though I didn't know why Kyoya had continuously picked lilies, I figured that he had probably figured out a little bit more about me than I had told anyone, "So," I decided to change the subject, "Did _you_ do anything in here?"

"That's exactly what I was going to show you next." He grabbed my hand, wrapping his fingers into mine as he led me upstairs. I figured that there would be another bedroom upstairs, but when he told me to close my eyes I was a little bit more confused than I probably needed to be. He took me by the hands and led me into the room. Once we stopped walking he pushed me down onto something that felt extremely like a papasan chair, and sat beside me, "Okay Kathrin, open your eyes."

"It's fucki…"

"Langauge"

"Sorry, it's like freaking _Beauty and the Beast_!" I screamed, jumping up out of the doublewide papasan chair and spinning around. There were floor to ceiling shelves that were filled with books, and a single moving latter connected to a metal rod atop the bookcases, "You are the most amazing person I have ever known." I grabbed him into a hug; pretty sure I heard his back crack, before running to the shelves and looking at all of the books.

"Tamaki and I actually came up with the idea together. He said that he got the idea when he was watching that movie on your birthday, and that you had mentioned the best present any guy could give a girl was a library. I took it one step further by having Kyoya figure out what kind of books you liked. I think Tamaki had Kyoya figure out how to ship your books from home as well."

I choked back tears. Hell if I was going to cry in front of anyone just because Tamaki's music had made me break my fifteen year streak.

"Thank you." I said into his chest.

"You are welcome," He pulled away from me and took out his keys from his pocket, "I have to go right now, but don't forget that Hotaru, Yuri, and I are coming over for dinner next week. Oh, and don't forget that we are going to the beach with the Host Club this weekend too." He gave me a peck on the cheek and a sweet head-cocked smile before walking down the stairs and exiting the house. I followed after I knew that I was alone and locked the front door, turning around and putting my back to the door.

This was a little bit too much, and it hadn't really sunk in yet that this was my new home. However, there was one thing that would make it sink in. I sprinted from the kitchen to the bedroom and slid on the wood flooring, flying onto the bed. I rolled around in the down comforter which felt so damn good. I had a friend in high school that told me that the only way that she could describe the feeling of a comfortable blanket, was snuggling with a guy who could wrap you entirely up in his arms. I wasn't entirely convinced about that, but nuzzling my body further into the bed was such a good feeling. Now, however, there was one thing left to do. I stood up on the bed and began to jump, getting good air. How many times have I mentioned that I am a nerd? Tons I hope.

"Who's there!" I yelled, jumping down off of the bed and running to the door.

"Oh Katie! I have wine!" I laughed and unbolted the door, letting Ranka in and taking the bottle of wine from him.

"Mmm, merlot."

"I figured that you would be tired of drinking Sake all the time, so I decided that I would bring it over. Ah, here we are!" His voice jingled as he reached up in the cabinet and grabbed two wine glasses, uncorking the bottle with an opener that he found in the drawer.

"Well you look like you've been here before."

"Haruhi and I were consulted by Kutano-san on the kitchen. I have the greatest connections for tableware, though the ones that we picked were way more expensive than I would be able to afford. They must pay very well at Ouran Academy." I watched Ranka pour the merlot and hand me a glass, swishing around his own before taking a sip.

"Thank you guys so much. It really means a lot to me that you were able to plan this all behind my back." I followed Ranka into the living room and sat down on the couch, curling my legs under the rest of my body as I took a sip of the wine.

"Do not worry about it Katie. All of the boys put in their own input from what Kutano-san said to me. You must be very special; then again, I always knew that you were. From the moment I met you when you were looking frantically around the airport, there was something about you that reminded me of my little girl. Despite your much more brash personality, no offence meant, perhaps it is the fact that people seem to be drawn to you."

"I don't see why. There really isn't much that is special about me. If anything I am more wounded than whole."

"Oh come on dear. Everyone is wounded in their own way, but that is no reason to put yourself down. OOO! A stereo!" Ranka leapt off of the couch gracefully, his beige skirt falling to his feet and flying out behind him with his movement.

"Here, pick whatever you want." I grabbed my iPod which was conveniently sitting on the coffee table and threw it to him. He turned on the device, and I watched his eyes get wide and a smirk come onto his face as he clearly found something he wanted to listen to and plugged it into the stand up stereo that included a hook up for an iPod.

"Come on, hunny, let's boogie!" Ranka ran back over to the couch and pulled me off as the song started.

"You can dance; you can jive, having the time of your life. Ooo, Ooo, Ooo." He began to sing, not horribly but not very well either. Better than the ear splitting Kurt and bear growling Hotaru, however. He pulled me into him and spun me around, before I took his cues and struck a pose as he continued with the music, "See that girl. Watch that scene, digging the Dancing Queen."

"If anyone is a dancing queen in this relationship it's you." I giggled, pointing at him before moving my arm across the room, my elbow arched behind my head.

"Oh not fair. Just because I am a queen doesn't mean you can't be one too. Come on Katie, I wanna see you shake what your mama gave you!"

I took the hint, laughing to myself as I got into the music too, "Friday night and the lights are low" Ranka took the hint and turned down the lights in the room, making me interrupt my singing with a Yuri-like pig snort, "looking out for a place to go. Where they play the right music, getting in the swing. You've come to look for a Queen!" I augmented the words a bit as I grabbed onto Ranka's collar and pushed him back, bopping my head to the side.

"Anybody could be that guy. Night is young and the music's high!" Ranka grabbed my hand and twirled me around as he took over the vocals. My heart felt light with laughter coming out of my mouth as he grabbed me again and dipped me, "With a bit of rock music, everything is fine; you're in the mood for a dance."

I joined him, "And when you get that chance!"

_You are the dancing queen_

I lifted my hands above my head and waved them around in a circle before bringing it down and moving them in front of me in a circle, doing what my high school ex called my "little white girl dance."

_Young and sweet only seventeen._

"Hahaha. You two are so weird." Haruhi's tinkling-bell laughter sounded from the doorway.

"Oh my dear! What in heaven's name are you wearing?" I turned the music down as Ranka ran to his daughter and began to pull at the huge yellow sweatshirt that she was wearing. She was also wearing plaid pants that were way too big for her as well.

"Tamaki-sempai put them on me after the twins tried to get me to wear a swimsuit. He was trying to preserve my modest or whatever. It didn't matter to me; I don't really like water parks anyways."

"They dragged you there, didn't they?" I received a nod in response and she was about to say more when her father grabbed her around the middle and tried to force up the sweatshirt.

"Daddy wants to see what those boys put you in. I looked at Katie's closet and thought that they had the best fashion sense, but let daddy see what they put you in!" Ranka managed to get off the sweatshirt and was working on the pants, Haruhi kicking and screaming at him playfully. I sat back on the couch and watched the two of them battle it out until finally Haruhi gave in.

"Oh my beautiful baby girl. You look so adorable!" Ranka clasped his hands together and pulled them to his chest, grinning from ear to ear. Haruhi was in an adorable pink one piece suit. I wonder why Tamaki made her cover up; the swimsuit was more modest than most I had seen before. I wonder if he…no, not with the way he acted towards other girls. It wasn't possible.

"Dad, let go of me." He let go of her on her command and then looked at his watch.

"Oh dear, look at the time. I have to get to work. Haruhi, do you want to come with me or stay here with Katie?" Haruhi nodded towards my direction and Ranka flashed me a smile before gliding out of the door. Once her father had left Haruhi slumped down on the couch, taking in a heavy breath and letting it out.

"You look like you had an exhausting day. Want to talk about it?" I asked her as I sat down next to her. To my surprise she leaned over and laid her head on my shoulder.

"Did you know that Honey-sempai is the national Judo champion and Mori-sempai is the national Kendo champion?"

"No. It surprises me more about Honey to be honest. To think that someone as small and cute as him would be a master martial artist is surprising." Without thinking I reached around the girl who as leaning into me, laying my own head on top of hers.

"Kate-sensei, can I ask you a question?"

"Sure, Haruhi. Ask anything you want." She pulled away from me silently and, again, without realizing it I brushed aside he bangs from her head.

"Well, it was kind of Kyoya who mentioned it to me, but he said that you and I should get to be better friends. To be honest, you are like the sister that I've never had, so that is easy for me, but I was wondering if you thought of me as a friend. Mostly I want to know because I get the feeling that, like me, you are alone most of the time and shut people out. I do it because I've always had to deal with things on my own because my Dad works so hard and my mother passed away when I was young. But, and really I guess this is what I am getting at, why do you do it?"

I sighed and was about to answer when Haruhi ran up to the stereo and turned up the song that was playing, "This is one of my favorite English songs." She said to me, switching to English.

_How can you see into my eyes_

_Like open doors_

"I like this song too. Haruhi, I…I don't know if I am ready to give you an answer to that question."

_Leading you down into my core_

_Where I've becomes so numb_

"Don't you think, Kate-sensei, that it is better to let someone know so that it isn't sitting inside of your heart like an open wound?"

_Without a soul, my spirit's sleeping somewhere cold_

_Until you find it there and lead it back home_

I sighed and reached behind me, finding a picture of my eleven year old self holding onto Lily, my little sister. Kyoya must have put it there. My mother was behind us, holding onto someone whose face had been cut out of the picture, the body colored over with black sharpie. I handed it to Haruhi.

_Wake me up inside, wake me up inside_

_Call my name and save me from the dark_

"Lillian Harmony Amendier was seven when she died…she was my beautiful little sister. She would have been twenty two this year, but she couldn't even reach that age." Haruhi didn't say anything to me, but looked into my eyes as she pointed to person etched out of the photograph.

"Who's this?"

"I can't, Haruhi. I can't." My heart was pounding as she took my hand.

"Well, don't worry about it Kate-sensei. Have you eaten dinner? I haven't, let's go make something!" Haruhi stood up and grabbed the yellow sweatshirt, putting it back on and walking towards the kitchen.

I didn't have the strength to tell her the rest of the story. Although, I had told her something, and that was more than anyone other than my mother knew. Shaking it off I turned a different son on the radio and walked into the kitchen, fully intending to enjoy the rest of the night and forget that I ever had this conversation with anyone.

IIIII

A/N – So I know that Kyoya doesn't really paint in the Anime or the manga, but I like the idea of him as a painter and being able to have something to channel his emotion (or lack thereof) into, so don't kill me. I was trying to make this chapter funnier than the last one but it ended up being sad again, I'm sorry. I feel like that could be why no one has reviewed for the last two chapters, because they haven't been that great. I hope the next one will step it up, though I think it will probably be same old. I am going to try and get some funnier ones without so much plotness. It would be really great if those of you who are reading this would let me know what you think! That means review, review, review! Thanks and see you in the next chapter.


	10. Hit Me With Your Best Shot

Hit Me With Your Best Shot 

_I wish they all could be California girls_

"Oh how appropriate." I buckled my seatbelt, rolling my eyes at the choice of music that Kurt had chosen for the drive down to the beach. Despite the fact that sleep had decided to play red-light-green-light all night with me, I felt pretty good. I had chosen to put my discussion with Haruhi out of my mind, choosing to focus more on the fact that I was now in my own apartment, and I was wearing one of the cutest swimsuits I had ever seen. It was a black one piece with a skirt that flared out right at my hips. The twins were my new best friends, seriously.

"How was your night last night, did Ranka show up?" I spent the rest of the drive talking to him about the rest of my night, dancing with the queen himself and cooking dinner with Haruhi then watching _The Ring_ in Japanese, both of us laughing and proclaiming that the girl crawling out of random household appliances looked like she had been vacuumed-packed in a container filled with dry ice. Conveniently, I left out of the conversation the picture I had shown Haruhi and the conversation about my sister.

Truly, Haruhi was probably right when she said that I should open up, but hell if it was going to happen before I was ready. That kind of meant that it wouldn't happen at all, but really I can talk myself around it well enough. In the end it was all self preservation. I really didn't need to be any more broken and bent than I already was, and if making sure that that didn't happen meant that everyone was going to be kept at a distance then fine by me.

"Ame-san! Want to go hellfish shunting?" Honey ran up to me as soon as we walked onto the beach. I blanched a little bit at the sight of the water. It had been a long time since I had consented to be this close to a large body of water.

"Haha, no Honey. I think I'm probably just going to crawl up that cliff and watch the day fade away. Have fun hellfish shunting." I chuckled despite myself as the teenager ran towards Mori, a bunny dotted pail in one hand and a shovel in the other.

"Were you making fun of him on purpose, Miss Amendier?"

"I was indeed, Mr. Hisugawa. He made an error that is very much linguistically relevant." I pulled myself up the cliffs side, making sure that I didn't slip or hit an unstable rock. Then again…Kutano Hisugawa was right behind me and it would be so hilarious if I fell on top of him. The scene all in slow motion, of course.

"Well, you're the big time linguist around here. What is your nerd-tastic diagnosis?"

"I wish to inform you Hisugawa-san, that information from as ravishing a mind as my own is going to cost you." I reached the top first, extending a hand to him and pulling him up, his face nearly an inch away from mine.

"Really? Well, why don't you give me the information now, and then decide how you want me to repay you when it is time for bed." Goose bumps? Really? Was my arm really breaking out into little bumps? I shook my head, focusing back on the linguistics.

"There is a difference between linguistic competence and linguistic performance. The former is that each person has the capacity to represent their language with complete perfection. In other words, their competence is 100%. However, each person's performance is flawed to some extent. Whether it be in vocabulary or grammar, no one can speak a language perfectly. Some would call these things Freudian slips, but most have no psychological relevance whatsoever, though they do have more linguistic relevance. Honey's mistake was called a spoonerism. The first phoneme of both words is switched. In this case the [sh] is replaced by the [he] and vice versa. If I did it with something like, 'My dear old queen' it would turn out like 'my queer old dean.' Your name would become Hutano Kisugawa, mine would become Athrin Kmendier."

"It's amazing how you flip into teacher mode so suddenly. You really are a nerd." He had sat down on the edge of the rock and pulled me down in front of him, wrapping his arms around me. I sighed and leaned back.

"Hey Kurt, how many other people have you been intimate with?" Yeah, I was hitting him with something random, but if this was going to happen I needed to know that he was not like my ex.

"Hmn…I plead the fifth."

"Nice try, wise guy. However, we aren't in America so you have no legal right to remain silent." I reached my hand around and poked him in the side, getting an audible squeal out of him.

"Fine. I dated a lot in high school. Many of my friends called me a man-whore. I partied almost every weekend and nailed a new girl every week. I'm pretty sure that I've done every girl my age in Tokyo at least once."

"Haha, so not funny." I blushed slightly, shaking it off, then slapping him hard on the leg.

"Well, I did date a lot in high school. I was somewhat of a jock so I was also a partyer. There was only one girl I was serious about, and that was in college. We drifted apart when she found an Italian stallion that she could ride more effectively."

"Wow, too much information. Did you two ever…" I felt him nod the affirmative in my ear and I sighed, "That must have made it harder once she cheated on you."

"We were together since high school, but that was a long time ago. How about you?"

"I dated an idiot in high school. He was a little violent. Never completely abusive, he never full on hit me or anything, but he was very physical and intimidating. A lot like my father, actually. I regret letting him in as much as I did, both emotionally and sexually." I felt him pull me in a little bit tighter. I had given him more information that I had planned on giving to him, but if this relationship was going to go anywhere we had to start being open. I knew more about him than he knew about me, mostly because of a print-out of his favorite things that I received from Kyoya. What? I know it is slightly hypocritical but just because I liked staying locked up tightly doesn't mean I don't deserve to know all about everyone else's lives. Maybe it's unfair and selfish, but it keeps me sane.

We sat on the rock in silence for a little bit, the soft breeze feeling wonderful on my face. It had literally felt like an eternity since I had been to the beach. Looking out at the water I watched as the sunlight hit the breaking wave like a bunch of diamonds floating with the ebb and flow of the water. I sighed and cast my eyes closer to the shore, noticing a small rock with two students sitting on it.

"Isn't that Tamaki? Who is that?"

"It's probably one of the Host Club clients. Kyoya decided that this would a good time for the Hosts to work on location and make some extra money. Didn't you know that that is the main reason why they invited us? There needs to be a teacher to student ration on off campus club events."

"So we're chaperones."

"Basically." Ha. Go figure that Kyoya would find a way to work out a 'free trip to my family's private beach. You can bring Mr. Hisugawa if you like' towards his own benefit. He had thought about this that far ahead of time too? What a little prick.

"Don't you think that that is a bit disgusting?" I said, focusing my attention back on Tamaki's throne where a new girl was climbing back up to join the Host Club King, and the other girl was walking through the shallow water in a love-sick stupor, "He makes all of those girls think that he is in love with them. It's setting the feminist movement back generations."

"I've had a lot of conversations with Tamaki about it. Really the only reason he does this is to make those girls smile. I bet that if you talk to any of the girls they would realize that this is an infatuation and not a serious relationship. They enjoy his company more than anything else. He makes them feel beautiful because they all are beautiful in their own unique ways. Tamaki, and the rest of the hosts as well, don't do it to take advantage of the girls, they do it to help them understand that they are human beings and are all beautiful."

"That was the sappiest shi…"

"Language"

"Crap…that I've ever heard. It's kind of sweet though." I sighed and moved slightly so that my side was pressed up against Kurt's so that I was able to look into his eyes, "Anyways, do you have any prior convictions?"

"Uh…no…that came out of nowhere." He looked down at me with a puzzled look in his eyes before nuzzling his chin into the top of my head. I had always pictured this kind of position in my mind, like one of those stupid romantic chick-flick movies, but either the main male characters in those movies were full of shit, or their chins were not as bony. I was thinking the former. Oh well, at least I've tried a little tenderness, "Since you asked me that can I ask you something now?"

"Depends. What you told me could affect someone's estimation of you. I honestly wouldn't judge you if you dealt dope at a college frat-boy party, but it is good to know if we are going to get serious."

"Don't I deserve to know what is wrong with you then."

"Excuse me," how dare he. Seriously. "There is nothing wrong with me. I am perfectly normal."

"I meant emotionally, mentally. Every time I see you, you force a smile and for all I know it is all a sham, that there isn't ever a genuine emotion in your eyes."

"That's not fair." I tried to put my conversation with Haruhi in the back of my mind last night, and I had succeeded in doing so. Why did he have to bring it up? Why couldn't they all just leave it alone? I was sick of thinking about it so much. I had spent fifteen years locking it all up inside of me, so why now of all times did these people want to bring it up, "You don't know…"

"Let me finish. You always seem so preoccupied, staring off into space. It isn't the look of an artist trying to find beauty in the world around them, it is a tortured look as if you were staring into a black hole of pain that is slowly stealing away your soul piece by piece. Let me in Kathrin." He scooted around me so that he was facing me directly, looking straight into my eyes, "Let me help fix you. Please."

"Every since I've gotten here I've been thinking about it almost every single day," I got up, grinding my teeth through the words. He stood and tried to pull me to him, but I wasn't going to give up my dignity and let him win, "I can't go without thinking about it and what happened then. Nothing can ever change what happened and I was okay with that until I met everyone here and somehow everything surfaced!"

"It's called love Kathrin. Everyone here loves you, cares for you, and wants to protect you, even if that means protecting you from yourself." He had a point. My mother had told me that I was like a ticking bomb, that one day I would destroy myself. No matter how much she told me that I didn't believe her, and I wasn't going to believe Kurt either.

"There's nothing to…" A few shrill screams caught my attention, and I looked towards two girls who were running towards a few members of the host club. They pointed to a cliff further down the beach. I could make out the form of two boys grabbing another boy around the cuff of a sweatshirt. I squinted…a large yellow sweatshirt. Haruhi!

"No! No! Haruhi, she is going to drown. Don't let him drown her. Please. Shit! Shit! Shit!"

"Kate, calm down!" Kurt's yell was fuzzy in my ears. His strong arms were around me in an instant, pulling me back towards him. I knew that he was being rational by my body fought him, my blood boiling inside of me. I was struggling against him like a wild animal tethered to a chain. I had to get to Haruhi.

"Let go of me! We have to get to her. She can't die, not again!"

"What are you talking about?" He still sounded distant. I tried to fight when I saw Haruhi go off the edge. This time I couldn't even mentally stop the tears from flowing. They started gushing down my cheeks uncontrollably, and I didn't have the strength to stop it, "Kate! Look, Tamaki has her. Haruhi will be fine." Kurt grabbed my throat with his hands, trying to make me see something.

"Don't touch me, you son of a bitch!" I yelled and smacked him away, my fist colliding with his left eye.

"Fine." He released me and everything came back into focus. I could feel the moisture on my cheeks, my face was flushed and all of my muscles felt sore. Sinking to the ground I looked at my hands.

"I…I'm…"

"Don't apologize, just tell me what the heck was going on!"

"I…I can't." I took off, climbing down the cliff as fast as I could. I didn't just do that. Mother, what you said came true. I acted like a wild animal back there but, but Haruhi…she could have drowned. She could have…Lily, oh Lily. I stumbled in the sand, attempting to continue crawling forward. My heart was sore; it felt like it was crumbling into little pieces like a wine glass falling and shattering upon the floor. I got up and ran once I heard Kutano yelling my name from behind me. I didn't want him to catch up, I didn't want to face him.

IIIII

"Kathrin Joy Amendier. Fucking idiot." I rubbed my face with cold water from the sink, then looked up to stare at myself in the mirror. My face was as pale as a ghost, as lifeless looking as one too. I couldn't believe that I had reacted like that. Did I expect anything less, no, I didn't. I reacted the way that any professional would have said that I would react in a state of mental turmoil. That was just it though; I should have been able to mentally stop myself. My mind was supposed to be logical and stop my heart from overreacting. I turned off the water and dried my face before exiting the bathroom.

I walked down the hallway, trying to figure out where I was, trying to bury what had just happened. I saw the light from a slightly cracked door and made my way towards it. As I got closer I heard voices talking quietly.

"Kyoya, I know that you know what is going on, and when you told me before that you could tell me about her I didn't want to know; I wanted her to come out and tell me, but after how she reacted today I need to know." Kurt's voice could be heard from inside of the room. Were they talking about Haruhi?

"Mr. Hisugawa, I have no reservations to telling you; however, you need to be prepared for the information." Kyoya.

"Mommy, if Ame-sempai reacted in the way that Hisugawa-sempai said, she needs the support that we can give her." With Tamaki's words I wanted to rush into the room, but something stopped me. My heart was beating as fast as it possibly could.

"Kyoya-sempai, Hisu-sempai, we are curious about what's wrong with Kate-sempai so we won't stop you," Kaoru said in his higher pitched voice.

"But don't you think that this would, I don't know, make her angry? Knowing that all of us are talking about her past without her consent might piss her off." Hikaru was thinking what I was thinking. I wanted to rush into the room and stop them before they started talking about me, but my body wouldn't move.

"At this point it is hurting her more with us not knowing. She is distant and tonight she nearly jumped off the cliff to get to Haruhi, not to mention I have gashes in my arms and chest from her as well as a swollen eye. I don't care about those injuried; they will heal, but if she is capable of doing this to me, imagine what could happen if she alone and something like this happens again. Kyoya, you are the only one with answers. I can command you to give them to me as your teacher, but I don't want to have to do it." Kurt's voice was stern and I could hear him take slow steps toward one side of the room. His logic made sense, and I looked down at my hands, stunned. I just remember thrashing around, trying to get to Haruhi. She was okay, she was in her room resting before the Host Club was meeting for dinner. Everything was fine.

I was fine.

Liar.

"Again, I have no reservations." I heard a chair slide after Kyoya spoke. Then there was the familiar ding of a laptop turning on, the click-clack of keys, and the small noise of a file being located, "Kathrin Joy Amendier and her sister Lillian Harmony Amendier once had the surname Damien. Their father Charles Mitchell Damien, a particularly angry individual, attempted murdering his entire family. He stabbed his wife, Amelia Adriana Amendier-Damien, multiple times and tried to drown both of his daughters. Kathrin was eleven and Lillian was seven. Amelia survived and called the paramedics who were able to revive Miss Amendier, but unable to revive Lillian. Charles Damien was sentenced to life in prison, Amelia Amendier developed multiple chronic illnesses, and Miss Amendier remains terrified of large bodies of water."

"Poor Ame-sempai…" Tamaki's princely sweet voice sympathized. I can't believe I let him say all of those things. He just sat there and rattled off my life like it was some investigative report for the student newspaper. How…How…

"You fucking idiots!" I burst into the door, huffing heavily, my chest hurting as if someone was trying to separate my ribs with a crowbar, "How dare you!"

"Ame-sensei, please, there isn't any reason to be upset…"

"Shut up, Tamaki. No reason to be upset? What the hell is your problem? You think that just because you are charming that you have a right to know about everyone's shit? You are such an idiot!"

"Miss Amendi…"

"And you, Kyoya, you fucking rat bastard! I knew you knew things about me. The lilies in the classroom, the lily painting. I didn't think that you would go this far! How dare you!"

"Kate," I felt Kurt's strong hand grab me by the arm. I looked into his eyes and saw my own emerald ones mirrored in his, both of them aflame, "Stop this, please. They were worried about you, we all are, and we have every right to try and help you. It is possible that we went too far but…" I tried to pull away from his grasp but he just pulled me back, "Listen to me damnit! Maybe we went too far but that is no reason for you to act like this towards them, or to me. We just want to help you!"

"Bastard! We. Are. Through!" I screamed, throwing my head forward, his forehead connecting with mine in a smash. I ignored the throbbing in my head and ran for the exit of the mansion.

How…how dare they? What the hell possessed them to sit there and talk about my life without my permission? Who did they think they were? I couldn't think straight. Had I overreacted? No, they were wrong. Were they though? They were just trying to help. Did anyone try and help me before? No. No. No.

I fell forward, this time I didn't get up. I could hear something rush towards me and before I realized it cold salt-water rushed over my head, neck, and shoulder. I spat. I screamed, swallowing in a bit of the seawater. No! Stop it!

"Kate-sempai!" I could hear two voices call from behind me before a set of hands on each shoulder pulled me up. I saw orange hair out of my peripheral vision. I fell back, the two twins sitting beside me, their chests heaving, their mouths gasping for air.

"What the hell are you two doing here. Leave me alone."

"Not going to happen sempai." Kaoru said, his amber eyes glaring down at me.

"You overreacted. We all did." Hikaru alleged as he brushed my wet bangs out of my eyes.

"But don't you feel that, maybe, things will get a little bit easier now?" Kaoru grasped my hand with one of his own before linking the open arm around his twins' shoulders.

"We used to be like you. Never letting anyone into our world, but one day it became clear what we had to do and why."

"Hikaru and I found people we wanted to trust, people that wanted us to be a part of their lives. You can't ignore people who want to love you unless you want to be alone forever."

"Kaoru, Hikaru, I can take it from here. Go to dinner. Make sure Haruhi is okay." I cringed and sat up. The foxes both gave me mischievous winks before getting up and walking away. Filling the void that the twins left, Kurt squatted in front of me so that I had to look up into his gray eyes. I noticed one of his eyes was swollen shot, and as I looked down at his arms and the parts of his chest where his button-down shirt was open I saw claw marks, some of them containing dried blood. What had I done?

"Kurt…I…I couldn't tell you myself because I've never told anyone. I was so afraid that it would hurt even more if I talked about it. I never wanted pity; I didn't want to be selfish, I…" I choked on my words, tears flowing freely down my face. Shit.

"Kate," Kutano Hisugawa whispered my name softly as he fell forwards, grabbing me as if I were a rag doll and pulling me towards him into a hard hug, resting his cheek against the top of my head, "I wish you would have told me. You see why I had to do it, you see why. I want to protect you, no matter what I have to do to be able to. Even if I have to go behind your back to do it."

Idiot. I can't believe what he was saying, not because I didn't think it was true but because I can't understand how someone could ever love me that much. He let go of me and I saw his eyes letting go of small droplets of water and I grabbed onto his waist, pushing myself into him again.

"I'm so sorry!" I wailed into his chest, his arms like a fortress around me.

I understood now. I understood oh so very well Kyoya, Tamaki, Kaoru, Hikaru. I understood.

IIII

A/N – This should be it for the depressing chapters for the moment. I know there wasn't much of the host club featured in this one, but I promise that the next chapter will be funnier and feature more of the sextet of gorgeousness. Thank you guys for reading this! I really hope that you review! Give me your feedback, let me know where you want this story to head. Let me know what it lacks, what it has that is cool, what could make it better! Aka…review!


	11. Mushi and the Jolly Green Giant

Mushi and the Jolly Green Giant

"Muffin! Nom, nom, nom!" I garbled to myself, twisting the muffin in half and stuffing the bottom part into my mouth. Ever since I was little I ate my muffins like this, saving the top for last. I did that with fries too, always eating the fries before the main course. Also, when I ate something with multiple colors I always ate my least favorite color (or flavor depending on if it was a flavored item) first. Let's just say that I can be OCD at times. Just like right now I made sure that I stepped on every single crack in the pavement.

It was nice sitting back in my new apartment last night after coming home from the beach and, despite everything that happened there, my heart felt lighter for some reason. After thinking about it, brooding about it, and then crying it out while reading _Macbeth_ with a large pile of starburst wrappers piling up beside me on the papasan chair, I knew that things were all right.

"Fuck," I sighed after stepping in a rather large puddle, one leg of my twin-produced beige dress pants getting soaked. Really, does everything have to happen to me?

"Kate-sensei?" A small voice made me look up from my duel-tone trouser leg. Haruhi, looking extremely adorable in her boy's uniform, was walking down the stairs of what seemed to be her apartment. Huh, to think that I lived this close to her and didn't even know it until now. Well done Kyoya, well done indeed.

"Off to school, Haruhi? Would you mind if I walked with you?" She tilted her head to the side and smiled at me, nodding in the affirmative. How could she still be so cute even after I had gotten to know her this well? After a bit of silence and walking a few more blocks Haruhi lifted her head and spoke.

"I heard about what happened at the beach. Kyoya told me about your sister, and Hikaru and Kaoru told me about how you reacted once you found out that everyone knew. They have a bad habit of trying to invade your personal life."

"I've noticed. Really, it is better that everyone knows. And now, everyone does because Kyoya is an evil rich bastard."

"All of them are rich bastards," Haruhi was one hundred percent correct on that one. She began chuckling with her tinkling laugh; I joined her. She was, of course, right about all of them. I remember one of the first conversations that I had had with Haruhi, where she said 'They all are a little bit much sometimes, but you can't help but be drawn to them. It isn't just their faces or the wealth either. Each of them has something special, something unique.' Already I had found out that they were all very crazy in their own way, but that worked for me.

Haruhi and I chatted about miscellaneous things, including the fact that she was entirely afraid of lighting and how both Kyoya and Tamaki had opened her eyes to some things, as we walked to Ouran Academy together; I even shared half of my muffin top with her and watched her scarf it down with a smile on her face. It made me proud that she was as much of a glutton as I was.

"Would you think that all of the boys, yourself too, would want to come over for dinner this evening? I'd like to do something for them to say 'wow guys, I'm sorry for being a douche.'"

"As long as you're going to plan on having a lot of patience, go for it. I think that apologizing to them might be good for them as well," She shrugged and I nodded. It would be a good thing to apologize, especially since I acted like a complete asshole towards them.

IIIII

"I was extremely disappointed with your assessments when I graded them this weekend. I know that punctuation is difficult for even native speakers, but since everyone in the class had B's and A's up till this point, I didn't think that it would be too difficult for you guys to understand the basic rules for commas." All of the students were whispering. I wasn't raising my voice to them, but I was being stern because there was no reason that the entire class, Kyoya, Haruhi, and Tamaki as exceptions, should have gotten below a C on the comma assessment.

"Can we go over it again then?" Hikaru and Kaoru asked together, both of their voices seeming completely board. Hikaru was even drawing in his notebook, both of them leaning on their hands, blankly staring up at me.

"Alright. If I have an independent clause followed by another independent clause, do I put a comma?"

Silence. I was met by blank stares. Tamaki was staring out the window, something that he often did. Kyoya was looking at me in the 'If you call on me I will scrape your face off with a scalpel' way. Honey was napping on the desk; Mori I knew would just go 'hmn' if I called on him. I stared at Haruhi, but she was looking at me with blank hazel eyes.

"If I have an unessential piece of information do I set it off in commas or leave it alone?" Hikaru's pencil snapped and Kaoru took out a pencil sharpener from his bag and handed it to his brother, his cheek soon again resting on his hands.

I sighed and leaned back on the blackboard, crossing my arms in front of me, "If I have an IC followed by another IC I need to use either a semicolon, a period, or a comma with a coordinating conjunction. A nonessential phrase or clause is always offset by commas. Understand?" No response, and no one was writing anything down.

"Alright, kiddos. What's going on? You are usually all _way_ more responsive than this."

Silence again. I knew that there would be days where this would happen, days when students would be completely unresponsive. There were so many days like that when I was in high school and college, days when I was in class but really my mind was back in my bed.

"Well, since no one seems to be interested in commas today, I'll read something. Let's see." I walked to my desk and scrounged around in my backpack and pulled out a small book of poetry, "How does some William Taylor Coleridge sound?" Of course no one responded. Though I did see Mori's eyes shift upwards slightly. To my great surprise everyone stopped what they were doing to quell their boredom once I started reading, so I muttered a grateful 'huh' and continued the poem.

The rest of my classes for the day went pretty much the same, no one answered any questions and in some of them I read poems or short stories. In my Introductory Spanish class we watched the "One Semester of Spanish Love Song," on YouTube, to which all of the students laughed hesitantly at first and then began to laugh with a more upbeat rhythm. To be honest, I was glad when my Introductory German class was over, and it was time for lunch.

I heaved a heavy sigh and leaned back in my chair, my neck draping so that I was looking at the wall behind me upside down. Soon enough my vision was blocked by the bottom of a powder blue jacket and a black notebook.

"Guten Tag, mein libeling. Do you have a question for me?" I asked, righting myself and turning around in my chair so that I could look up into the eyes of my student. My mind was torn between wanting to smack him and to hug him. Where was his right to discover my inmost secret and blast it to the world, but then again, as Kaoru had said, "You can't ignore people who want to love you unless you want to be alone forever." So as much as it pained me to say, I kind of owed him.

"Miss Amendier, I…"

"Kyoya, there's no need to apologize."

"Uh…" Kyoya stuttered. I think I actually made the Shadow King uncomfortable. His usually cool persona wavered only slightly. Just a small little bit, but it was enough for me as he continued, trying to be so damn cool as he righted his glasses with his finger, "I did not come up here to apologize, Miss Amendier, I merely…"

"Lies. Haruhi told me this morning about what else you did at the beach," I heard him stutter again, smiling deviously despite myself, "Despite that hard and cool exterior, you're as warm as Tamaki on the inside. Kind of like a biscuit: crunchy on the outside and fluffy on the inside."

"You are mistaken. As a studier of language and idioms I know you have heard of the phrase 'nice guys finish last.' Indeed, nice guys, like Tamaki, always finish last. As I intent to always finish first, there is nothing soft permissible. However, Miss Amendier, your theory is an intriguing notion in its own way."

This time it was my turn to stutter as Kyoya walked out of the classroom. That boy really was quite amazing in his ability to never let his guard down around anyone. Though I didn't believe a word that he had just said except that he didn't want to finish last, I could see that someone, Tamaki specifically, had somehow weaseled his way under Kyoya's skin. I'm sure that that is a story left for another time, and I am anxious to hear it.

"Is it safe to come inside?" I heart Kurt's voice say from the doorway, his hand knocking against the panel. Without even thinking I stood up, clasping my hands in front of me. Oh gosh…really, these past few days have been an emotional roller coaster with enough g-forces to destroy gravity's hold on anyone.

"I told you last night; I am not mad at you. I understand what you tried to do, and I really can't blame you. I'm quite thick-headed."

"That's what he said."

"Touché, Hisugawa," I giggled as he walked in and pulled me into a hug, "Touché"

Again, one of those moments to pause and reflect on my life. Oh my goodness, what a ride this has been. The person who was holding me in his arms, as well as a pair of devious foxes, a bunny rabbit and a giant, a shadow king, a fathering tranny, a bipolar prince, and Haruhi all seemed to grab my ribs with an iron pry bar, bearing my heart, malleable and ripely beating.

I am such a NERD!

IIIII

When I opened the doors, there was the Host Club dressed in waiter cosplay. It would be normal if they were all sitting in their respective places directly parallel to the doors, but as with everything in this damn school nothing was normal. Hikaru and Kaoru stood in the middle of the room gyrating in opposite directions from one another, scratching all over their torsos like rabid dogs.

Kyoya was sitting calmly at a table, his laptop open in front of him. His head leaned to the side, rubbing the back of his jaw and neck on his shoulder secretively. Mori was sitting on the couch helping Honey scratch himself, tears welling up inside the small blond teenagers eyes.

"What the hell is going on?" I asked as I walked forward to greet Haruhi who had her arms crossed, trying to hide that she was scratching her arms.

"Just watch. You'll see in a second or two." I cocked my head to the side before hearing a bloodthirsty scream coming from the adjacent room before watching a small white things scurry across the floor, Tamaki chasing after it with a cardboard box.

"Come on, kitty. I just want to play with you and make sure that you get to a shelter. I'm not going to hurt you." Tamaki was talking to the cat.

Of course that was going to work. Cats usually respond to being chased after by tall blond boys who are carrying a cardboard box. There was no way that that wasn't the best plan in the world. Sarcasm was dripping in my thoughts like a leaky faucet. Drip. Drip. Drip.

Honestly, what did that moron think that he was going to accomplish?

"You found it boss." Hikaru and Kaoru stopped scratching themselves long enough to begin chasing Tamaki and the cat, who had decided that it would be the best course of action for it to begin darting under the couches.

"Hikaru, Kaoru, you take that side of the couch and I'll take this one." Tamaki ordered, flinging his arm gracefully at the twins and then to the couch, all three of them getting on their knees and waiting.

"How long has this been going on?" I turned to Haruhi who had begun to scratch the back of her neck. As soon as I saw her reach behind her I realized that my legs were beginning to itch.

"A few minutes after opening everyone began to scratch themselves. Kyoya-sempai and Tamaki-sempai thought that it would be better if we closed the club for today because the girls were getting rather uncomfortable." Immediately I looked over at Kyoya who was silently calculating in his black notebook, the tip of his pencil subtly rubbing the underside of his chin.

"That makes sense to me. Does Tamaki really think that he is going to catch that cat?" Haruhi looked at me and rolled his eyes before shifting her eyes back to where the twins and the Host club king were on all fours.

"Ah! My beautiful face! C'est horrible!" Tamaki screamed, flying backwards dramatically while holding his cheek that had obviously been scratched, the white cat running from where Tamaki's body had just vacated and heading towards where Honey was sitting, his eyes still filled with tears.

"Mori-sempai, jump on it!" Hikaru and Kaoru yelled, leaping in synch with one another over the couch and past the bawling Tamaki who was still mourning the wound to his face.

"That's what she said," I grumbled, trying not to laugh. Up until this point it had always been me who was the frantic one, running like a chicken with its head cut off in order to evade some torture or awkward situation that these boys were professionals at putting me in. It was great to see them all (except for Honey because he was just so adorable and looked so much like a little boy right now that I couldn't help but feel bad for him and actually had to force back the maternal desire to kiss the boo-boos and make them feel better) going crazy because of one little kitten. Even Kyoya seemed to be bothered even an iota by what was happening.

"Uh oh. Watch out Kate-sensei." Haruhi nodded her head forwards where a white fluffy kitten was galloping towards where we were standing.

Oh shit. I placed my hands out in front of me, only to feel a small wet nose touch my collarbone and curl up into my arms, shaking.

"Stop!" My yell rang out, stopping the twins from leaping at me when they were only inches away. I looked down at the little white cat that had begun to lick my arms. Poor little thing. It was no bigger than my forearm, "Aw, were those big mean teenagers trying to catch you. Don't worry; Kate is going to protect you from those idiots." I kissed the top of the fluffy things head before glaring at the twins and Tamaki, all three who were looking as if they wanted to have kitten-a-la-king for dinner.

Pretty soon all of the hosts, except for Kyoya and Mori, were looking at me, all of them looking at me and scratching themselves with huge eyes that said 'help us Kate, please help us,' except, as I said, for Kyoya whose eyes said "death to that wretched thing that lost the Host club money today", and Mori whose eyes said, well, nothing.

"Would all of you quit looking at me like that? Come with me. Let's grab my stuff and all go over to my house. I swear. Men are such babies." I tossed my hair back and turned, rolling my eyes with Haruhi as she walked alongside me mumbling "damn rich people" under her breath

All the way back to my house I held the small white cat that was still trembling slightly, though not as much as before, while the sextet of gorgeousness followed Haruhi and me, all of them itching wherever they could reach.

Really, why me? I had just gone to the Host Club to walk Haruhi home; I didn't think that I was going to play mom to a bunch of snobby teenage boys who were so pristine that they couldn't even handle a few fleas. Dear God, baby Jesus, why were sweet girls like Haruhi and myself stuck with these boys.

"Aright, go in and sit on the couch. If you find a little black thing on your legs or arms then just pick it off and squish it as hard as you can. Haruhi, can you get some athletic tape out of the first aid kit and some ice cube cubes out of the freezer. If you see one of the guys with a red mark or bump on his legs then put a piece of ice on the bump and wrap it on with the bandage. And all of you, would you stop itching, it's going to make it feel worse." I rolled my eyes as I walked over to the sink and filled it with soap and lukewarm water.

"You're going to hate me for this little one," I whispered to the cat as I dipped it into the water, rubbing the soapy water into the kitten's skin and fir, ignoring its tiny woeful protests. Behinds me everyone was surprisingly quiet, and I could feel holes beginning to form in my back. I felt like an ant under a magnifying glass on a really sunny day.

"Ame-sempai…" The twins called towards me at the same time I pulled the white cat out of the water and dried it off. At this point it new that it was useless to wiggle around and try to get free, so it let me finish drying its coat off. I placed it on the floor and it stood there for a second, walking to the edge of the counter and peering around the barstool towards the boys in the livingroom.

"Leave this kitty alone. It's mine now, and that means if you hurt it then you will die. I'm going to go change. Behave."

Once I got in my room and shut the door I walked to my closet and started banging my forehead against it. Tonight I was going to highly medicate myself before going to bed. Tylenol PM, thou art my relief! I pulled on my pajamas and flopped my robe over the top, staring at myself in the mirror. Good grief! My eyes were bloodshot after one day, and one Monday to be exact. Someone out there hates me.

"You idiotic pest. Get off." I heard Kyoya grumble from the other room. Oh, if he was hurting that little kitten then there was going to be a smack down right here and now. I gritted my teeth and opened the door.

"Kyo-chan, it loves you!" Honey had gotten off of the couch and walked up to Kyoya who had the most sour expression on his face. I covered my mouth to stifle the sinister laughing that was vibrating its way up my trachea.

"It looks like you've made a friend, Kyoya-sempai." Haruhi said innocently from where she sat on the floor next to Tamaki, her words were subtly tempered with malice. I knew I loved this girl.

The small what kitten had somehow crawled its way up Kyoya's body and landed on his shoulder, curling up on the cosplay, its pink nose nuzzled in the crook between the Shadow King's neck and shoulder.

I should have resisted. I should have been a good teacher and saved my student the embarrassment that this one particular moment was bringing him, but at one singular moment my eyes locked with the amber ones of the demon foxes. It was infinitely better to have them as accomplices rather than enemies. Quietly I leaned over towards where I had placed my phone and got in a position against the wall to where I could see Kyoya's seething expression and the curled up cat perfectly. In one moment the twins and I had blackmail for centuries to come as I took a picture with my phone.

"Miss Amendier, you should have no intention of replicating that photo unless you want to face severe consequences." He was trying to remain so cool, but it totally wasn't fooling me. I clicked a few buttons, ignoring him, "Miss Amendier."

"Consider this my apology to the rest of you for reacting the way that I did at the beach," five simultaneous cell phone beeps rang, giving me the goosebumped sensation of my own makeshift Hallelujah chorus, "Kyoya, you and I already ironed out our differences earlier today, so consider this a _favor_. Think of how much money you could make when the copy that I sent to Mr. Hisugawa's e-mail is made in poster sized format, framed, and placed in Music Room #3. Of course there will be duplicates made and left unframed, as well as wallets. You wouldn't want to disappoint those girls, and I have it on good authority that you take unauthorized pictures of the rest of the host club and sell them to the customers," In truth I bought one copy of each book to help Haruhi pay back her debt faster, but that wasn't the point, "The girls want, nay _deserve_, to have your coolness and sweetness memorialized in eight by twelve color copies."

Bam! I flung my hand in the air and made my fingers snap together in the tobacco chewers snap as I walked back to the kitchen and pulled out two folds of pizza dough that I had made the other day.

"Everyone up for food?" The stunned silence lingered over the Host Club before the small kitten leapt off of Kyoya's shoulder and onto the shoulder of Mori as he was the first to walk towards the counter. The rest of the boys followed, even Kyoya, though his arms were crossed and his glasses were especially glinty, "I have all of these toppings," I pointed to the miscellaneous veggies and meats, "everyone take a piece of this dough I cut in quarters and roll it out into a disk and put whatever cheese and toppings you want on it."

The boys were looking at the dough curiously. Haruhi shook her head, making me laugh as she demonstrated the way to make a pizza, muttering "damn rich people." That girl made me so freaking happy.

"Ame-san," Honey had been lifted onto a barstool by Mori so that he could reach the countertop in order to make his own pizza.

"Yes sir?"

"What are we going to name your kitty? It has to have a name." Honey said in his sweet voice as he reached up to pet the kitten that was sitting on Mori's shoulder proudly, placing Usa-chan prominently in my view to fully orchestrate his point.

"You should name it something in Japanese," One of the twins suggested calmly. I think it may have been Hikaru, but I wasn't paying enough attention to the voice because I was pounding the pizza dough into a circle.

"You speak Japanese all the time now and only speak English when you're in class, so a Japanese name would fit the best." The other twin, probably Kaoru, spoke after as the little white kitten jumped onto his head and pulled at his bangs then jumping over to Tamaki's head.

"It has to be something daring and brave, a name befitting a Shakespearian History!" Tamaki twirled his arms in his normal flamboyant gesture.

"HICKKKK!" Little white fuzzball! He not only got a swipe at Tamaki's doll-like face, but he also hissed at the Host Club King.

"Sorry Tama-chan," Honey said sweetly as the little kitten jumped onto the counter and wobbled over to Kyoya, getting a look from the Shadow King that could crash a Mack-truck, and then deciding that he was safer if he scurried over to where Usa-chan still lay, "Takashi, do you have any ideas?"

That wasn't going to work Honey. As brilliant as Mori might be on paper, when it came to speech it just was not going to happen.

"Mushinomi," Mori…said…way to judge Kate, way to judge, "Mushi for short." Mori continued his speaking as he grabbed the small white kitten and handed it, Mushi, to me gently.

Awwww, Mori! I wish that we could paint him green and call him the Jolly Green Giant.


	12. If You Mess with the Bull, You'll Get

If You Mess with Bull, You'll Get the Horns

You know what that rat bastard did? You know what he did? He gave me MORE responsibilities. I know that we played a harmless prank on him, and Tamaki said that he even walked around with some semblance of a smile on his face because of how much money the host club had raked in because of that picture of him. It was even more hilarious because the picture made Renge fangirl out on her whole Miyabi fascination again.

"So I heard what Kyoya signed you up for. Once the chairman talked to him about it he was pretty excited that the Choir club would have an adult director. The Choir clubs president is also a member of the Physics club and he seemed thrilled that you would be joining them, especially considering the threat the Zuka club poses during competitions." Kurt walked into the room at lunch, setting down a container of sushi on my desk and popping off the plastic top.

"That's what I was thinking about. Rat bastard."

"Language, please."

"Hey, I've gotten better." I poked my chopsticks at his face, sticking my tongue out, before picking up a piece of raw fish and eating it. Oddly enough, I had been noticing that my filthy mouth was becoming more and more clean, well, at least more moderated lately. Really though, bastard was not that bad of a curse word.

"It's funny to me though. No one knows if you even have an ounce of musical talent. Kyoya said nothing about it when he met with the chairman, but he figured having an adult present once the Choir club meets up with the Zuka club would dissuade the students from any shows of violence. Basically you are a glorified chaperone, just like at the beach." He grabbed a piece of ginger and put it in his mouth, crunching down on the flat disk, hiding a smile.

"Oh boy. I am so thrilled. Why can't they just leave me alone?" For emphasis I folded my arms on the desk and let my forehead fall on them. I heard Kurt's river-like laugh as I felt his strong hand on my back.

"If I know you Kate, and I do, you will do just fine. Even if you can't carry a tune, and I hope you let the president know that before you attempt to sing, I think that this would be a good thing for you." After a strong pat that made me jar a bit…well, a lot…I lifted my head and moved my chopsticks to grab another piece of sushi.

"I hate men." I grumbled, pointing my sticks into Kurt's food filled face. His cheeks were bulged out, making him look like a fat squirrel. Raising my one eyebrow at him I leaned my cheek on my hand and poked him with my chopstick. Why was it that men always ate food? Truly, I had a theory about this. There was always the idea that men had two stomachs, really that was one of the only reasons that they could eat like a garbage disposal, but my theory was going to burst open the cosmos, "You worked for NASA, right Kutano?" Hehe, I poked him again.

"Yes, I did." He forced himself to swallow all of the food he still had stuffed in his mouth. It looked like it went down hard. I hope it hurt as much as the stomach pains I would have in an hour from only getting three pieces of sushi for lunch.

"So, if I could ask you to find an astrophysicist that could prove my theory that one of a man's two stomachs, because it's common knowledge that your species has two stomachs, leads to a black hole somewhere in the universe, could you find someone?" I poked him again, mwahahaha.

"First of all, biologically speaking men have only one stomach and are the same species as females. Second of all, I do know a few astrophysicists from America. Third of all, though I don't specialize in astrophysics, your theory couldn't possibly be true because if each male's theoretical second stomach connected to a black hole, the physical proximity of all males in relation to one another would basically overwhelm the gravity of the earth and everything would be sucked into space."

"Zzzzz…Zzzzz…and you talk about me slipping into teacher-mode?"

"Well you're so cute when you start talking about the International Phonetic Alphabet and sentence diagramming." He grabbed my cheek and pinched, the very grandmother-ish way, as he got up and threw the empty container in the trashcan, "Don't forget that afternoon classes are canceled because of the fine arts thingy. You have to have a choral piece to perform by tomorrow afternoon. Have fun!"

And he left. Why does he always find the perfect opportunities to skip out on me when I need him the most? The first time was when I was trying to pick apart the dog-pile of beauty back in chapter seven, and I am sure that there have been other times. Sighing I picked up my backpack and keys, locking the door behind me as I went to Music Room #1.

_Tell me that you're alright_

_Yeah Everything is alright_

_Oh please tell…_

HEY PRETTY ONE ITS HOTARU. KURT SAID YOU MIGHT NEED A SONG FOR YOUR NEW POST AS DIRECTOR AND SINCE YURI WORKS IN A LIBRARY I THOUGHT ID HAVE HER SCAN A SONG IN FOR YOU AND THE KIDDOS. KURT DROPPED PHOTOCOPIES OFF IN THE CHOIR ROOM EARLIER TODAY IF HE DIDN'T TELL YOU. SEE YOU FOR DINNER THIS WEEKEND.

I flipped my phone closed and shook my head. Kurt has a habit of doing this kind of thing too. He was hanging out with those Host club boys too much, I swear. My face felt warm as I smiled. Either way, he was a sweetheart and way to perfect for my sorry ass.

"Kantoku! Thank goodness you are here!" A boy in black rimmed glasses and very disheveled, dark auburn hair ran up to me, shaking. My eyes widened. This was class 1-A's class representative, a member of the Physics club, and the president of the Choir club? Why were all choir boys either gay or incredibly geeky, and geeky in a bad way?

The rest of the students were looking at me from their places on the risers, each of them with a piece of sheet music in their hands. I only recognized a handful of students from my classes, including Kanako from Into to Linguistics, the girl who was proposed to the night that I met Kurt.

"Konichiwa!" I greeted. The Japanese felt like sand in my mouth. I was so used to speaking Japanese every single day and had no problem with it; however, I was nervous. I moved over to the podium, feeling the teenager in the glasses following me so closely that I could feel his nervous breath on my neck. All of a sudden I felt more annoyed than uneasy. It was like I was being followed by that guy from _Hey Arnold!_, the one who follows Helga around and breaths on her neck. Unfortunately I had to refrain from punching this guy. Shame.

"Kate-Kantoku, my name is Kazukiyo Soga. I wanted to thank you so much for joining the club. With the Zuka club on campus, we really need the support from the faculty so that there are not any more disturbances when all of the Choir and Drama clubs get together at Ouran Academy for our Cultural Club Exposition." He was almost panicky as he would pick one of his feet up every few words and set it down, immediately picking up the other foot. At least Tamaki's brand of annoying was more endearing, this guy was just plain skittish.

"Thank you for sending Hisugawa-sensei with the music. I really liked this song when I was a child and this arrangement is fun! We all decided to come into the music room early to practice and get it down during out lunch. Getting a head start is always good. By the way, I am Momoka, Momoka Kurakano." I had seen this girl before. She requested Haruhi almost every time she went to the Host club, and I was always fascinated by the way she got her hair to knot up on the sides of her head like horns. I always thought of them as horns, but she just seemed too sweet for them to be horns. She was as sweet as nectar.

I nodded my head to the both of them, thanking them for their introductions and they went to join their fellow club-mates on the risers. Looking down at the music on the podium I smirked. The song was _Hotaru Koi_, a song that I am sure Hotaru asked Yuri to pick out. Hotaru, both the name and in the song, means firefly, and _Hotaru Koi_ was a Japanese children's song. Lily, my Lily, used to love hearing me sing it to her when I was first learning how to speak Japanese. Not only was I sure that Hotaru asked Yuri to pick out this song, but I am pretty sure that Kurt had something to do with it. Kutano Hisugawa, what will you think of next?

"Alright singers, Miss Kurakano pointed out that you have practiced this song during your lunch. Let me hear how you guys sound. Anyone have a pitch pipe?" Kazukiyo walked forward and handed me the small pitch pipe, all of the club members looking at me expectantly.

Ah, that's right; Kyoya didn't even know that I could carry a note, so how would these club members know. I shrugged off the smile that was beginning to creep onto my face as I blew the starting notes of the song.

"Ho, ho hotaru koi,

Atchi no mizu wa nigai zo

Kotchi no mizu wa amai zo"

To my surprise, they all sounded very good. I directed, keeping time and trying to give direction as far as crescendos and decrescendos. Despite this being the first time I had looked at the music for this song in years, I was an expert at conducting in only the private solitude of my own room so this wasn't too horrible, and they all knew what they were doing. They had obviously done it without a director for years.

"Listen to those notes ladies. The fragrance of the female parts drowned out by the bland tenor." Oh…no…fucking…way…bitch. I snapped my neck to the side, the audible crack echoing in amazing acoustics the room had. Then I turned it to look at the talk, skinny girl standing in between two other girls.

"Excuse me? Who are you and what gives you the right to walk in here and spread foul and underhanded words about my tenors?" She walked closer to me, her hands on her hips which were swaggering as if she was trying to be a model. I straightened up. She might be taller and prettier than me, but there is no way that I am going to back down. Not to mention, their tall white socks with the off-white bow and heels were definitely fashion sins.

"You are a pretty maiden. Your curves are exquisite which, along with your accent, leads me to believe that you are from elsewhere among the stars." The tall one leaned down and ran a finger along my cheek before looking up. Creeper.

"Lady Benibara, of course you seem to be correct. Such a voluptuous frame." The girl with longer hair stepped forward and ran a hand up my side. Double creepers.

"You three have no place in our music room. Please leave." The sweet young Momoka stepped off of the riser and walked up to where I was being touched…eww…but the three newcomers.

"You again. Really maiden, I promised you last time we met that my mind was never going to be changed. You would be better off lending your sweet voice to the Zuka club rather than flaunt your talent in front of these boys. I bet you even still visit that wretched entertainment club" The one named Benibara brushed Momoka's cheek before twisting a lock of her hair in between her hands.

"Get your hands off of her." Kazukiyo's voice stuttered from the risers as he walked forward, wringing his hands, his face blanching.

"Alrighty. All of you. I don't like you verbally attacking my students, nor do I like you breeding reverse sexism in my presence. What. Do. You. Want." I growled. Nothing else mattered right now, this bitch was going to answer me. She was pissing me off.

"Hmph. Come on girls. This pathetic man loving choir is worthless to us." Yeah Benibara, walk away. That's the smart move.

"That's right Benibara, they are of no concern to us now. This is the year we finally investigate that useless Host club!" The short haired one asked as the other two girls began walking out.

"Hold it," I cocked my head to the side, gritting my teeth together. Gosh I do this a lot; I should really look into buying one of those gelatinous teeth guards, "I said, _hold it_!" Those jerkwads, they kept walking.

"Kantoku, this happens every year, but only since the Host Club was established. The Zuka club has become increasingly occupied with starting fights among our female choir club members about the Host club. Calling them all a band of testosterone filled pretenders." The class rep said as he wiped off the collected sweat from his glasses, finally breathing easier now that those three girls from that other school left.

They had pissed me off, especially the way that they treated the men in my choir. Not to mention the fact that they were way too touchy feely with my girls and myself. They were going to go down.

IIIII

"So she thinks that you are going to choose St. Lobelia and the Zuka club over Ouran and the Host club?" Haruhi had just finished telling me about her meeting with those three femi-nazi miscreants. I agree that, before that night at the beach, I had thought that the Host club was just taking advantage of those girls, but in addition to Kurt's support of the boys as well as how they were beginning to influence my life, I knew that they all just genuinely wanted to see their female peers smile.

"I would never choose their school over Ouran. I have a plan for my life, and law school will be much easier to apply to and be accepted in if I have my degree from Ouran Academy."

"Is that all?" She bowed her head slightly, nodding in the affirmative, "Lies."

"It isn't just my plans. Like I said before, there is just something that draws you in when you are around Tamaki-sempai and the rest of them."

"Ha. I've noticed." I also noticed that the only name that she mentioned was Tamaki's. Curious, very curious.

"Besides, those girls views are kind of skewed. I don't really like what they are saying, because I just believe that sex doesn't matter. Well, have a good night, Kate-sensei." Before I had noticed it, we had arrived at her house and she was waving goodbye and heading upstairs.

Sigh…I waved and began walking towards my home.

The evening wind felt good against my skin, especially against my flushed cheeks. What was I going to do about that Zuka club. I had no idea about how to confront them. According to Haruhi they were dead set in their "maidenly" ways and were not going to change. Apparently they had also completely humiliated Tamaki, though that idiot probably didn't see it that way. I wonder what those boys were going to do now. If there was any time that Kyoya needed to have a plan, this was it.

"What the hell?" There were lights on in my house. I ran, thinking that it was either Ranka or Kurt.

When I opened the door, there was the Host club.

"What are you all doing here?" What were they all doing here? The twins were on the floor, using a piece of string to play with Mushi. Honey was playing with Usa-chan, Mori-sempai watching him like a hawk. Tamaki hunched over in the corner while Kyoya was staring at his black notebook, his face as normal as it always looked, but his pen as still as the grave. , "You all look half dead. It's those Lobelia girls, isn't it?"

My heart wanted to break at this moment. All of them were deep in thought, their proverbial brain-wheels turning at a few hundred miles an hour. They couldn't honestly think that Haruhi was going to leave Ouran and leave them in the process.

"Ame-sempai?" Tamaki stood up and walked towards me, his blue eyes staring down into my green ones. Despite my lack-luster enthusiasm about blonds or his princely characteristics, Tamaki was quite an attractive young man.

"Yes, Tamaki"

"We've spent a lot of time together, right?"

"Sure. You're like the annoying little brother I never had and never wanted." There he goes, back into the corner, a cloud of darkness hanging over him like his pathetically idiotic existence, "But now that I have you in my life, I guess I can deal with the fact that you are oh so obnoxious. What do you need? All of you, what do you want me to do?"

"Tama-chan had a good idea today." Honey looked up at me from the floor and smiled quickly before continuing to play with the bunny.

"All of us decided that Haruhi would be a good fit for an all girl's school," Hikaru stood, picking up Mushi and putting the little snowpuff on his right shoulder then helping up his brother.

"But none of us want her to leave." Kaoru leaned on the unoccupied shoulder as both of them looked at me with their amber eyes.

Uh…oh…they all looked depressed, but could they really just all be thinking about the same thing. The same way to solve this problem.

"Tamaki came up with an idea that may actually work. We came here because you have certain _items_ that we need in order to make this plan work."

"Ame-sempai, please, my little girl can't leave the Host club! She would be poisoned by those unnatural girls at that school, and we all just want her to stay with us." Tamaki pulled himself up out of his moronic-perpetuated gloom and leapt over to me, staring at me with big sapphire puppy-dog eyes before whispering in my ear.

"You need WHAT!" I could not believe what I had heard. Tamaki backed up against the wall at my scream, and the twins and Honey joined him. They all looked petrified but, really, really that idiot thought that _this_ was the best plan. I shook my head and stormed off into my room, "Well are you guys coming?" I grumbled, hearing the plodding of multiple pairs of feet follow me into the room before opening one of the drawers of my dresser and pulling out a number of the same garment, throwing them on the bed. Shock. Paramount shock etched itself on my face as I sat down on the bed.

"I think that, given my position, I shouldn't have to cosplay like this. Someone of my status should not be forced to do this. I'm not saying it isn't an effective plan, I am just saying that I don't think I should take part in this particular cosplay" Kyoya opened his notebook and jotted down a small note before snapping the book closed and moving his glasses up.

"But mommy dear, it's for Haruhi. Besides, here is a purple one that will match your gown fabulously!" Tamaki addressed the shadow king with his pet-name for him, also giving Kyoya those horrible puppy dog eyes. Here we go.

I can't believe this is going on right now. I can't believe that I am not only watching this right now, but I am also aiding and abetting this madness.

"Fine," Kyoya set down his notebook on the dresser and held his hand out towards Tamaki, "Give me the damn bra."

IIIII

Today was the day. I could hear the theme music from _The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly_ in my head. Mwa ah ah, mwa, mwa, mwa. Mwa ah ah, mwa, mwamwamwa. I walked towards Music Room #1. The twins, bless their demon hearts, had given me a black pin-striped suit with a purple silk undershirt. I looked like a woman on a mission. I looked like a mafia member. I also looked like Kurt did the night of my birthday, which was so totally cool because I loved that outfit on him and now we were a pair!

Anyways, I opened the door to the music room and there were my students. I had only met some of them for the first time yesterday, but they were _mine_, and I was their director.

"That song was performed exquisitely, but the vocals were turned sour because of the tenor voices. Those boys are definitely the weakest link in your chorus, maiden." Benibara walked up to me and slid her fingers down my profile.

"If you touch me again," I grabbed her wrist and pulled it away, glaring into her eyes. I noticed that all of their lips were an awkward shade of pink. It made them look like fish, to be honest, "I will string you up by your vocal chords."

"You just don't understand, maiden. The bond between members of the same sex is too strong to ignore. Don't you tire of being forced to be subordinate to a world full of testosterone happy puppies looking to get one leg up on womankind?"

Wow, there were just so many things about what she just said that were just wrong.

"Look, I am totally okay with you guys being Lesbos. I am from America, we have debates and stuff about your alternative lifestyle choices and, whatever, respect. I get that choice. I like men. I like my students, and that includes the Host club. Even the guys at this school will tell you that they don't just flaunt their beauty to get sexual favors; they do it because they want to make these girls smile. To let them know that they are beautiful."

"I had no idea, Lady Benibara, that even this elder maiden would be overwhelmed by the malice of those Host club boys. It's just like this pathetic choir. Brought down by men." The long haired lobelia girl said.

"Shut-it blondy." The three of the girls looked at me, their arms crossed. Clearly they were so wrapped up with their own ideologies that they weren't going to learn anything, but that doesn't ever keep the teacher from schooling them, "Woman's lib may have happened, but true Feminism has nothing to do with women overcoming men. It is about equality between the sexes, men and women together."

"Ouran Academy is pathetic. I truly believed that such a fine institution would beyond having its teachers spout this kind of nonsense. This chorus is laughable in its use of the male voice. Having a women's group would garner far more respect in the musical community. And as for that wretched Host club, those boys are…"

Benibara continued her rant, and I was about to jump down her throat, grab her by the vocal chords, and string her up from the crystal chandelier. As I was about to interrupt the three of those lobelia girls I heard something behind me.

"Tama-chan, why are we spying on Ame-san?" Honey said rather loudly.

"Mitsukuni…" Mori shushed his cousin up, and I looked behind me. The Host club member's heads were stacked like a totem pole, Mori, Tamaki, Kyoya, the Twins, and Honey. Shouldn't they be getting ready? I didn't need this right now!

"…Idiotic boys and their stupid philandering ways. All of them are rotten to the core."

"Can it twiggy!" I walked forward. I was so ready to smack-a-bitch it wasn't even funny, "You mess with my tenors, you mess with me. You mess with my students, you mess with me. You mess with _my_ boys, you mess with me. Let's go."

"Fine, maiden. I came prepared for a showdown, and it looks like it is going to happen. You are American; therefore, you should know of the musical _Rent_. In it, the two beautiful maidens who embrace one another sing a ballad. I find it appropriate. As I am the one initiating the challenge, I am the lead. I will sing the 1st verse and 1st chorus, then you will pick it up with the 3rd verse and 3rd chorus."

"Bring it on twiggy." I heard the music go on. She thought she had me. This girl thought that she was going to sing one over on me. Hells to the no. I knew that she would want to take the lead, but hell if I was going to let her dominate. Only novices think that the lead always outshines the harmony.

"Every single day I walk down the street

I hear people say baby so sweet…"

Her performance was flashy as she did twirls and other random ass dance moves, completely missing the point of the song. It sounded too lyrical, and she was flat. Now that could just be me being overly judgmental, but she didn't know what was coming. The conversation the boys were having behind me was more interesting than her performance.

"Kyo-chan, do you think that Ame-san can win?" Honey said. Out of the corner of my eye I saw him look up at Kyoya.

"I don't know Honey-sempai, nothing in her record says that she can sing." The Shadow King's response.

"This could be really really bad" Hikaru and Kaoru sounded together.

"Trust her. She knows what she is doing. Ame-sempai will she will do anything to protect her students, to protect her family." Tamaki's blue eyes stared at me as I turned my back away from the Lobelia girls as Benibara was finishing up the end of the verse. He nodded to me and gave a dashing smile, "Just like we will." He flashed part of the pink bra that he had picked out last night. I saluted them in good luck before turning around.

I scanned my students, all who were completely dumfounded by Benibara's grace and showman…womanship. She messed with my choir, and she messed with my boys. Back off biznitch.

IIIII

"I can't believe you didn't tell me that you could sing. I also can't believe that you were that harsh on students, even if they were from another school." Kurt was straddling the chair next to my desk as I searched music online.

"I just hope that the Host club is as lucky as I am in their plans." I was still on a high after completely owning that twiggy femi-nazi earlier and decided that I would skip out on the other Cultural clubs productions that day in order to go back to my classroom, take time to breathe, and start looking for music for my Choir club. Later on in the year all the schools were judged on musical reviews that they put on. I found this out from Momoka and Kazukiyo before leaving the Zuka club's performance. Each of them had a little light in their eyes after I had totally owned. It was good to see.

"What are those boys doing anyways? I saw them all running up to Music Room #3 with what looked like bras. When I blinked they were gone. It must have been a mirage." Kurt rubbed his temples before leaning over and kissing me on the cheek before getting up, "Well, I am going to head home, it's been a long day. You get some rest t…what the heck is going on?"

Haruhi was giggling profusely, as she walked into the room. Her cheeks were flushed with laughter as she was flanked by all of the boys in wigs and Victorian era gowns.

"What the…" Kurt repeated his confusion as Honey, the twins, and Tamaki held out upturned thumbs towards me. I nodded and gave them a thumbs-up back, locking eyes with Tamaki's.

"Come on guys, dinner's on me!" I yelled as I grabbed my bag and exited the room with Haruhi and the rest of the boys following.

"Yeah! Kate-sempai's cooking, Kate-sempai's cooking!" Hikaru and Kaoru ran in front of the group, both of them singing to their own little tune, their pigtailed hair-pieces bobbing up and down with their movement.

"Please tell me what is going on here?"

"Whatever do you mean, Mr. Hisugawa?" Kyoya said behind me in his bland voice, his black notebook replaced by a purple fan.

"KATE!" Kurt's voice was pleading as it echoed down the empty hallways after us. The twins looked back at me and winked, before continuing their little sing-song. They were right, it was much more fun to keep him in the dark about this one.

IIIII

A/N – Well, hopefully this will start an upturn in the humor. Though, knowing me, it may not last much longer. I appreciate all of your comments, suggestions, and praises, and hope that I am doing well with this story. To the question of OOCness, I am sorry *prostrates self on floor.* I am trying not to make these characters OOC, but as they are not mine and are Bisco Hatori's I am finding it rather difficult at times. Sometimes the characterization suffers for the plot, for I am imperfect. So I am really really sorry. I do have a super duper special favor to ask of you all, in addition to reviewing. I am putting a poll up for one of the future chapters of this story when Kate-sensei goes back to America for a specific reason. I have run through multiple scenarios based on who should go with her, and can't seem to make up my mind. Therefore, I figured that I should ask my readers, for you all are what keep me writing. I'd appreciate your input!

As always, thank you for reading!

P.S. - The songs in this chapter are the choral arrangement of _Hotaru Koi _which can be found at this link if you wanna listen to it .com/watch?v=1rxZzm8tzss, and "Take me or leave me" from the musical _Rent_.


	13. A Day in the Life of the Hisugawa Family

A/N – Hullo all. Thanks to all of you for the reviews, and if you haven't been reviewing I would really appreciate your feedback. This chapter is dedicated to one of my friends who has shared many hours of linguistics and grammar with me and gave me the idea for the furz. This chapter is mainly a plot chapter for Kate and Kurt, so it is kind of serious.

A Day in the Life of the Hisugawa Family

"Let's play the 'which one is Hikaru game!'" Yes boys, the best way to break in a Monday morning was to make me pay attention to which one of you is which one. After a host free weekend as well as a Kurt free weekend (Kurt, Hotaru, and his wife had to cancel our dinner date), I was not ready to be back at school. Spending the weekend reading the collected short stories of Edger Allen Poe and watching horribly sappy chick-flicks, bawling my eyes out while accompanied by a bottle of sake and bowl of noodles made for the best weekend. Miraculous, I'd say.

"If you guess right then you get a prize" One of them said as he placed his face on the right side of mine, placing his hands over the attendance sheet that I was filling out.

"I have a lot of work to do before class starts. Can't we just do this after class?" I stood up and moved to the board, writing down the sentences, 'After we bought food for the kitten, we chopped it up,' 'the hotel has bowling alleys, tennis courts, comfortable beds, and other athletic facilities,' and 'for sale: an antique desk suitable for lady with thick legs and large drawers.'

"Holy shit…taki mushrooms." I turned around, the twins so close to me that they nearly gave me a heart attack.

"Come on, Kate-sempai. What do you have to lose?" I glared at the two of them. They were going to fucking make me do this. Well, at least I knew they were here in class and not off torturing someone else, skipping out on their education. That was a tinsey tiny plus.

"The one on the right is Kaoru, and the one on the left is Hikaru." I guessed without looking up, checking them both off on the attendance sheet as I said their names.

"Uh oh, you got it wrong." They both sang to me, taking off the hats hiding their hair. I glanced up tiredly and noticed that they hadn't tricked me this time. I just failed to tell them apart. Story of my life.

I hate Mondays. Say that in English, in a fake Russian accent, and it fully captures the horribleness of Mondays, especially if you follow it up with 'I vish uncle Boris vould air strike Mondays.'

"Is there anything else that you want?" The two twins hadn't left my desk and were still staring at me with their sinister fox grins. They shook their heads no in synch, then turned away, skipping towards their desks in step with one another. I rubbed my temples. Drugs. It was time for drugs. Opening my desk drawer I quickly pulled out four aspirin (what, it isn't an overdose, trust me) and popped them in my mouth, waiting for the medicated rush to travel through my veins.

"Today we are learning about misplaced modifiers. Each of these three sentences on the board have modifiers that are misplaced. As the sentences are, what do they mean?" Monday was shining on everyone's faces. I don't even understand why I actually was planning on teaching something today; it wasn't as if I had enough energy for this and they obviously didn't.

"It's actually quite funny. In the first sentence, 'After we bought food for the kitten, we chopped it up,' the modifier is describing the noun immediately preceding it, so in this sentence it isn't the food that we are chopping up, it is the kitten. In case you didn't know, that is not cool."

"Mushi, Mushi, Mushi" I heard two fox voices whisper from behind me as I circled 'for the kitten' and drew and arrow from the circle to the end of the sentence.

"All of you write down the next two sentences and fix them by moving either the noun phrase or the modifier. When you are done come up here to get it checked before you do the exercises on page 258, which are due tomorrow. If you chose not to do them now just don't make any noise."

Teacher cop-out, right there. Bonafide laziness handpicked and gift-wrapped for your convenience. Class then passed by without a sound. I checked their papers and then everyone sat interacting with one another, everyone filing out to their homeroom classrooms at the end of the class period.

Choir club during the noontime lunch came and went. It was quite fucking fantastic that these rich students were privileged enough to have an hour lunch. We only met as a group for the first 30 minutes. The afterschool part of the club was for sectionals and they were still student led. It was a good thing because I really didn't want to give up my entire lunch and my occasional visit to the Host club.

"Om, nom, nom, nom!" I love spicy Doritos. It's like the amazing of Doritos, with more amazing sprinkled on top because they are spicy.

"Even while you are stuffing your face you look damn sexy." Kutano Hisugawa was suddenly standing in front of my desk, and I looked like a freaking squirrel that just stuffed a bunch of acorns in my mouth. Whoever said that girls were supposed to be delicate and refined had clearly never met me.

"Sowurrrry…awr fuuurck"

"Language, Kate." I rolled my eyes at him as I crunched down the chips. Mental note: Do not shovel in sharp foods; it will only lead to pain and embarrassment.

"So what did you come here for?" Fuck it. I want my chips. I shoved two or three more Doritos in my mouth, putting securing my elbow on the desk and leaning my cheek on my hands. He smiled at me, his teeth showing. Damn, he was so sexy.

"Well, to make up for the fact that Hotaru, his wife, and I couldn't make it to dinner this weekend we decided that you should come to my house. That is if you think that you are up for it."

"I've never been to your house, so that would be just peachy with me." I shrugged. Up for what? It couldn't be that bad, could it?

IIIII

"What the hell would possess you to not tell me that your parents will be there? If you had told me that I would have made sure that I didn't look like shit. I thought you said that we were going to _your_ house."

"Language. We are going to my house. I happen to live with my parents, well, in their guest house actually. Actually, it is pretty much an entire apartment unit behind the house."

"You are such a geek! You are thirty one and still live with your parents? Bahahahaha!" That was honestly too much. I was angry that he didn't tell me I would be meeting his entire family beforehand, but the fact that he was still living with his parents made me want to point and laugh at him. Of course I liked him too much to do that, but it was so amazingly tempting.

"Are you done mocking me yet?"

"Wait," I couldn't resist, I pointed at him and let out one loud 'HA,' "Okay, I am done now." We parked and as soon as we got out of the car I grabbed his hand and kissed his cheek. Either way, if he lived with his parents that meant that they were probably good people. He was nearly the Mary Poppins in my life, practically perfect in every way.

The door opened before we got to it and, lo and behold, the giant Hotaru was standing in the doorway, a huge grin on his face. Damn, he looked even more like a bear now than he did.

"I can't believe you decided to subject the Pretty One to this madness. You were definitely dropped on your head as a baby." Hotaru pulled Kurt into a manly hug before bowing to me and moving to let me into the house. Oh, by the way, this wasn't just a house. It was a huge ass mansion!

"Madness? What is this madness of what you speak? Unless you are just talking about yourself" Kurt shrugged, patting the bear-man on the back before grabbing my hand and dragging me through the house. The inside was so spacious and the crystal chandeliers made me want to swing from them. Everything was bright and cleaned to perfection. I was way too low-class for this.

"Ruya, have you seen my husband anywhere? I can't seem to find…KATE!" Yuri came out of a door. She looked like a whale.

"Thar she blows. Look out guys, pregnant woman passing through!" A woman came towards us from the room that it looked like they were heading. I liked her already; we were on the same brain wave. Yuri was grabbed by a laughing Hotaru and both moved out of the way of the woman rushing towards us. She had the same hair color as Hotaru, and their facial features looked very similar. "Kurty, is this her?" The woman came close to me and leaned towards me, her nose almost touching mine. Okay, maybe I didn't like her so much since she had just popped my personal bubble.

"Ruuya, we are going to do introductions at the dinner table. Scat, all of you!" I tried to see where the voice had come from, but before I could look around the woman named Ruya was ushering me into the kitchen, Kurt nearly falling behind with her haste.

"You get to sit with us!" Ruuya whispered in my ear excitedly as she pulled me towards the light. Fuck me sideways! The room that I was pulled into was probably the most extravagant dining room I had ever been in. It was dimly lit in the room, most of the light coming from the dimmed chandelier hanging from the wall. There were candelabras on the table, the flicker from the candles shining off of the china.

"Holy…"

"Kathrin." Kurt really must have a cuss-dar. I swear. Bah, that's probably why he has such a strong one. I really do curse a lot.

"Scheise." If anything, the learning of numerous foreign languages allows one to curse even more effectively and in a more cultured way.

"Kuku!" A deeper woman's voice said from behind me. Ruuya had let me go as she, Hotaru, and Yuri walked in and sat down at the table. I watched Hotaru pull his wife into a kiss, Ruuya faking a gag as she sat across from them. Truly I was confused about who everyone was, but everything would be clear.

"Really, I am _not_ interested!" Kurt said forcefully. I turned. BITCH! It was that Yuuka chick from the volleyball game and she had her hands all over Kurt's arm and hair.

"Come on Kuku, I really think that you should let me." She finally saw me. That is right bitch, I am here, right here, back off, "You brought her? Good." Yuuka walked past me patted me on the shoulder.

What the hell? _I'm Yuuka. I saw that you came with Kutano Hisugawa, don't think that a foreigner like you could ever mean anything to him, apparently you don't know him well enough yet to know to stay away._ That was what she had said to me at the game. I…am…confused!

"Kurt," I whispered as he pulled the chair next to Ruuya out for me, "What is she doing here?"

"Oh, Kuku, go sit by Hotaru, I'll keep her company." Yuuka had pulled the chair out from Kurt's grasp as she flashed me a sly smile that rivaled even the twins. As she sat down she made sure that her shoulder grazed mine. A shiver went up my spine. She gave me the feeling that I was about to regret every setting eyes on Kurt.

"Mom! I want to go to the movies with Yasuchika and Satoshi! Why do I have to be here!" An older woman walked into the dining room, followed by a young teenager. Holy crap, how many people were in this damn house?

"Stephanie, you are going to sit down at dinner for now and then you can go out with those boys. I am sure they will understand." The older woman said as she motioned for the girl named Stephanie to sit down next to Kurt as she herself moved to the head of the table next to Ruuya. It was good that I was so adept at language because it meant that I was also good at remembering names. If I wasn't I would feel even more confused that I was now. Honestly I felt like a kid who got lost in a supermarket and everyone begins to look like their parents because they are so afraid. Shit.

"Kutano, since it is your guest that is gracing our presence tonight you should be the one to introduce everyone." A deep male voice said, materializing into the seat at the head of the table. I was so preoccupied with the fact that I was damn petrified I didn't notice the large man (a complete carbon copy of Hotaru I might add) came and sat down.

To summarize: I was sitting with Ruuya on my left and Yuuka on my right. Yuuka had an empty chair next to her and to the right of that chair, at the head of the table, was the older man who had just appeared. Yuri was sitting across from the empty chair; Hotaru was sitting across from Yuuka; Kurt was, thank God, sitting across from me; Stephanie was sitting across from Ruuya; and the older woman was sitting at the other head of the table between Stephanie and Ruuya. Confused yet? Me too.

"Well, to begin introductions then. Kate, this is my family. You already know Hotaru Tanaka and his wife Yuri. These are my three sisters Yuuka, Ruuya, and Stephanie Tanaka, and these are my parents, Kura and Daisuke Tanaka." My head was throbbing as I made sure that I smiled at everyone once Kurt had said their names. Kura was a beautiful older woman, and I could see that both Stephanie and Kurt looked exactly like her. They all had beautifully silky black hair. Of course, Kurt was just plain sexy. All the other siblings looked like Daisuke, especially with their lighter shade of strawberry-brunette hair.

"Uh…hi. I'm Kate, I mean, Kathrin Amendier. You…ah…don't pronounce the [r]." GAHHHHHHHHHH!

"Good, now that she has introduced herself can I go! I promised the two of them that we would go to the movies!" Stephanie's outburst interrupted my rapidly palpitating heart.

"Stephanie. Be considerate to our guest." Daisuke said firmly. Stephanie didn't react well, she just stuck out her tongue. Wow, what a little brat.

"Steph, da furzy thinks yer sherd shtay with Kurt and be _nice_ ter Kate, giver me little hergs and squeezes." Kurt was nuzzling Stephanie's ear, sounding like a little furry wooden creature. AHHHHH! So creepy!

"Kutano, stop! Haha!" Stephanie giggled, her neck cringing away from where he was making unintelligible squeaky woodland creatury noises.

"Clearly you've never met 'da furzy' before." Yuuka was trying to hide her own laughter as she watched Kurt and Stephanie interact.

"He always did it to her when she was little. She will practically give into whatever he says or asks when he does it, watch." Ruuya whispered in my ear.

"Fine, I'll stay; just let me call the boys, okay?" Stephanie excused herself from the table and ran out of the room, pulling a cell phone from her pocket and dialing a number. I shook my head up and down in affirmation of what Ruuya had just said to me. The creepy furry voice worked. What the fuck?

As soon as she came back to the table all of us were ready to eat. The food came and I was just about ready to dig into the noodles on my plate when my name was called.

"Would you like to say Grace, Kathrin?" Kurt's mother asked me, her grey eyes staring at me in the same way that Kurt's do. Fuck, I couldn't say no! Shit, I shouldn't even curse in my thoughts when I've been asked to say Grace. Damn…I mean…shoot. Wow, I'm going to hell.

"Uh…dear God, baby Jesus," Bah! My mom took me to church when I was younger and I used to be really into this kind of stuff, but it had been a _long_ ass, I mean, long time since I had prayed or even though about praying, "Uh…thanks for these people and, uh, for Kurt, and…uh…uh…for noodles. Amen" I opened my eyes only to see Hotaru raise his eyebrow at me before shaking his head. Stephanie was profusely giggling, and not silently either.

"Well, thank God for noodles." Daisuke raised his glass of sake in the air and took a sip, rolling his eyes. Help…me…

IIIII

"Hey, Kutano, can you take me over to Yasuchika's estate? I don't want to take the limo." Stephanie asked once the meal was finished and the table was cleared.

"And Kurt, if you're going can you take Yuri home for me? She is exhausted, and I kind of want to spend more time here." Hotaru also asked.

"Here we go again. The Hisugawa chauffer service is now running." Kurt got up from the table and walked behind me, pecking me on the cheek before walking out of the room with the pregnant whale and Stephanie following.

"It was so nice meeting you, Kathrin. Please come by again and thank you for being so good to my boy." Kura stood as Daisuke pulled the chair out from the table, helping her up. The two of them gracefully left the dining room. With me completely unaware, Ruuya and Yuuka had moved across to the other side of the table so that once I shifted my gaze forward again I was met with three pairs of chocolate brown eyes staring at me, each with a sinister smile on their face.

"Uh…hi." Why did he have to leave me alone with them? Wasn't there some rule in the 'bringing your date home to meet the family' handbook that says you are not to leave them alone at any cost?

"I would have sworn that you would have had more questions for us at the table than you did. That either means you are telepathic and can read our minds, or you are just so confused that you can't even begin to unravel everything." Yuuka said as she folded her arms on the table and leaned closer to me.

"How are you his sister? You were all over him at the volleyball game. That is confusing." I mirrored her gesture. First impressions count for a lot, and her first impression with me was as a bitch who was out to make Kurt her lover, not as a sister.

"What you have to understand about Yuuka and Kurt's relationship is that Yuuka would do anything to protect Kurty, which includes telling you that you don't have a chance. It's her way of protecting him and making sure that if you are going to pursue him then you have the balls to fight her. Also you have to understand that she is a beautician and has _always_ wanted to cut Kurty's hair so that it is short. He hates short hair so he refuses." Ruuya spoke up, mirroring her sister's gesture. Hotaru was just sitting there, smiling at me with his arms crossed over his broad chest.

I ran through that day at the volleyball game…clearly Yuuka was challenging me and if he really doesn't want her to touch his hair and it has been a point of contention between them their entire lives, then that could be why she clomped him and he pushed her away so forcefully. So much for her being a bitch. Anyone who cared that much about Kurt must love him, and I respected that because I cared about him too.

"I just didn't know he had such a loving family. It makes me happy to see that you all get along so well. The Tanaka's seem to be a…" I looked up at them.

"I think the light bulb just went on. Kuku said that you were one of the smartest people he knew, but you should have caught that during the introductions." Yuuka rolled her eyes at me and looked up at Hotaru who sighed.

"Kura isn't really our mother, at least not our biological mother. She was pregnant with Kurt when she was 16 and our father, Daisuke, took her in off the street because she had no money and was living under a bridge. Our biological mother didn't take to kindly to this, but she was pregnant with me so she didn't say anything. Kurt and I are both thirty-one. We were born only a few days apart. Two years later Yuuka was born, which makes her twenty-nine. Two years after that Ruuya was born, which makes her twenty-seven. After Ruuya was born our mother left us because she had been having an affair, so Ruuya has never known another mother other than Kura. Our biological mother was a bitch. She didn't like us because we reminded her too much of our father, but she hated Kurt even more."

"Kura and Kutano lived in the apartment where they live now, and our mother couldn't deal with that, even though our father and Kura barely every saw one another because it would be inappropriate. However, a year after our biological mother left, our father and Kura finally acted on the romantic attachment that they had for one another and got married. Hotaru and Kurt were seven, I was five, and Ruuya was three." Yuuka picked up where Hotaru had stopped. That would explain why the three of them looked so alike, and why they all looked almost exclusively like Daisuke Tanaka.

"So what about Stephanie?" I asked.

"She's our half-sister, the only child of both Kura and our father. It's part of the reason she is so special to us, that and the fact that she was born when we were on holiday in the U.S. fourteen years ago. She was born in Kura's older age though, so we almost lost her. Kurt was beside himself and never left Stephanie's side when she was in the hospital. To be honest, anytime any of us were sick or in trouble Kurt was always there." Hotaru answered my question, looking towards the candle, his eyes looking somewhere else.

Ruuya picked up his speech quickly after, "Even though we aren't related to Kurty by blood, he is the oldest and we recognize him as such. We take our job as his siblings seriously because he…"

"Ruuya, don't talk about that! She knows all she needs to know right now." Yuuka pushed herself from the table and walked out of the room, Ruuya getting up quickly and following her sister. Hotaru heaved a sigh in front of me.

Such a scandal! I wouldn't have expected any of that, even from how everyone interacted.

"Hotaru, what is it?" I really wanted to know. I am a horrible person, so though I was actually thankful that my secrets were out in the open, I also thought that I deserved to know.

"Part of the reason Yuuka feels like she must protect Kurt is because of our mother. Even though Kura wouldn't come to the main house, Kurt would come and play with us. One day Yuuka and Kurt were running around the house and Yuuka knocked over an expensive statue. Our mother came up and began yelling at Yuuka, grabbing her and shaking her. She was only four; she didn't know what she had done wrong, so she screamed and cried. Kurt started to try and protect my sister from my mother and, because of her hatred for him and Kura, she pushed him away. He fell through the window, two stories down. Yuuka was the one who called me over and who took care of him while I called the paramedics. Our mother said it was an accident, and it probably mostly was."

"Shit." I covered my mouth with my hand. How could any mother, any human being for that matter, do that to a child? My father was the scum of the earth for what he did to my precious Lily, to me, and to my mother. Even if that woman didn't mean to shove Kurt that hard, she could have chosen not to shove him at all, "Something like that could have a lot of impact on a child."

"It did. Kurt's biological father, though none of us ever met him, was prone to anger. Part of the reason my mother pushed Kurt was that he had become violent. He was young and reacted poorly but, he has a temper."

"There you are Kate. I think it is time that we get you home." Kurt walked into the room and Hotaru rose, shook his hand, and walked out of the room leaving the two of us alone.

"Hi," I stood up and waved. What did Hotaru mean by 'he has a temper'?

"You look like you've seen a ghost. They were nice to you, right?" I nodded as he came over and grabbed me around the waist, pulling me towards him and pecking my forehead before looking at me with those smoky eyes.

"Can I ask you a question?"

"Sure, Kate."

"Do you have any secrets that you are keeping from me?" I asked as Kurt led me out to his car, opening the door for me and remaining silent until he turned the car on.

"They told you, didn't they? About my mom and Daisuke? My mother is my mother, and my father is my father. Just because we don't have the same blood doesn't mean anything to me. I would die for them." He shifted the truck in gear and began driving.

"Kurt. You seem like the perfect person for someone like me. You are sweet and honest, noble and secretly funny, and I want to be with you, but I don't want there to be secrets between us. You said the same thing to me when you found out about my father, so I deserve to know. Hotaru, he, he mentioned that you had some anger issues and…what the hell are you doing?" He swerved off of the main road and into an ally, parking the car and looking at me, glaring at me. It was like his eyes were set afire, his pupils dilated as he stared at me and his hand reached up to his neck and squeezed. He had done that before. That time when Hikaru and Kaoru had woken Tamaki and Kurt up by jumping on them.

"Get out."

"What?" Oh hell no. Hell no.

"Get. Out." I got out. He drove away, the tires skidding. I stood and watched the taillights of the pick-up fade away and, before I knew it, tears were streaking down my face. I walked out of the alley and realized that I was still a few blocks away from my house. Why did I get out? Why couldn't I just press my point? Why did I have to ask in the first place?

"Kurt, you stupid spit-fuck"


	14. Why Am I Always the Idiot?

Why Am I Always The Idiot?

_Tuesday_

"You look horrible, sensei," Haruhi enlightened me about my appearance as she walked down the steps of her apartment building.

"I didn't sleep at all last night. I ended up reading _Hamlet_ and sentence diagramming all of the important monologues and soliloquies while chugging down three liters of Pepsi. I can still feel the sugar coursing through my veins." All of that was true, except I left out the fact that along with those three liters of Pepsi were a few shots of sake. I kept running over my conversation with Kurt over and over in my head. Every time I heard his voice saying "get out," I cringed just a little bit.

"Kate-sensei, did something happen between you and Hisugawa-sensei?"

"Uh…" Damn. If there was one thing that I had noticed about Haruhi from her school performance and the time that we spent together, it was that her incredible capacity to adorable you into a stupor was only matched by her capacity to see through you. Of course, the capability of her to be so adorable only made you want to spill everything, and of course I did, "I was stupid and tried to pry into his past. I figured I had the right to after what happened at the beach, but as per usually I was wrong."

"It's never good to invade someone else's privacy for purely selfish reasons. I think that that is the difference between what happened at the beach between you and everyone else and what happened between you and Hisugawa-sensei. Under the pretence of being concerned about your relationship, you invaded his privacy because you were curious, not because you were trying to protect him or yourself. That is pretty selfish."

"Shot through the heart, and you're to blame. You give love a bad name." I sang in English. Ye olde Bon Jovi is always good for these moments. Haruhi gave me the look she gives Tamaki a lot, the "what the hell are you thinking, Sempai" look. At least this time she chuckled after giving me the look. That was more than I could say for Tamaki.

She was right, and I had already admitted that I was the one to blame for this whole thing. That's probably why I couldn't actually sleep. I always had a bad habit of not being able to sleep when I knew I had done something wrong. It's the whole, "Don't go to bed angry" idea coming back with a vengeance.

"Kate-sensei, I baked these this weekend and had extra. Maybe they'll make you feel better." Haruhi handed me a bag filled with almond cookies before running off into the school building. I shrugged and walked to my classroom, placing the gift of food in one of my desk drawers. I leaned back in my chair as the students filed in, thinking that I should go find Kurt as soon as noontime recess hit and I was done with the Choir club.

It was amusing that I was one of the only teachers who had their own classroom because I taught elective courses. Most teachers in Japan moved from class to class rather than the students moving from class to class. It was nice though. That was a random thought. Oh well.

We went over the worksheets the day before, and I was pleasantly surprised that the students grasped the idea of misplaced modifiers with ease, though I did spy some rabid fangirls asking Tamaki, Kyoya, and Haruhi for help the day before.

"Tamaki, can I talk to you?" His blue eyes looked up at me from his desk where he was whispering to Kyoya, passing the Shadow King's black notebook back and forth. Curious. I had never seen that notebook come out of Kyoya's hands.

"Yes, Ame-sensei?" Tamaki pulled a chair up to my desk. I noticed that, in the light, his eyes that always looked so blue to me took on a more violet shade. Purple means good judgement. I couldn't say that that fit this blond king incredibly well, but at times he had really shown himself to possess a decent head on his shoulders.

"I actually have a favor to ask of you. As you know, I am directing the Choir club, which means that I will also be directing the school musical during the School Fair. The pianist from the Classical Music club accidently broke both of his hands and will not be able to play, incidentally I would very much like you to lend me your talent."

"It depends on a lot of things. My allegiance lies forever to the Host club and if helping you with the musical conflicts with any of the Host clubs events then I will have to politely decline." His voice was super silky as he stood and made a few flowing arm movements as he bowed towards me slightly.

"Damn, it really must be hell inside your head." He went to move off towards his corner but I stood up and grabbed his wrist. He turned back to me, his eyes exactly like puppy eyes. I gritted my teeth. It was NOT going to work on me, "Anyways, Tamaki, I can make sure that none of our practices or the performances will conflict with _any_ other clubs activities."

I watched the students finish their assignments, and taught the rest of the day. Everything seems like it passed in a microsecond, mainly because my mind was and continues to be somewhere else. I am so stupid.

"Kantoku!" Momoka's sweet voice called to me as I must have arrived at Music Room #1. See what I mean about my mind being somewhere else?

"How come there is no one here?" I looked around the bare music room and noticed that the only person there was Momoka.

"This week we are taking a break, we usually do at this time of year. I was on my way to come see you though because Kazukiyo and I chose a musical for us to do." Well, they were the president and vice-president after all, so of course they should have taken some initiative over their own club. That was an insensitive thought. Lighten up, Kathrin, lighten up, "It's _Grease_!" She held up an entire score to my face. I began to flip through the pages. Thank God Haruhi had taught me how to recognize Japanese letters because the entire musical was in Japanese.

"How did you guys think of this?" I wasn't entirely sure this show was school appropriate, then again I could edit out certain bits as the director to make it school appropriate. It also would be interesting to take the melodic line of "You're the one that I want" and squeeze "Anata wa watashi no nozomi desu" in the same space. There was a difference of seven syllables there.

"We wanted to do something that would remind you of home. Plus, Lobelia is going to do something romantic and spectacular, so we figured we would go for something a little bit different. A little more edgy."

It was creepy to hear her sweet little voice say "edgy," though if she were saying it in English it would seem a bit creepier.

"Alright. If you think that this can be done then I will help you guys do it. You can count on me." I gave her a thumbs-up, she smiled and ran out of the Choir room. I don't think I can do this. I hung my head as I walked towards where Kurt would normally be during lunch hour.

I turned into the lounge and didn't see him. I went to the classroom he was usually in before noontime recess and the classroom he was usually in after noontime recess: no Kutano Hisugawa. I went back to my classroom, defeated once again when he wasn't there.

He was avoiding me. I knew it. I knew that he was avoiding me. I am a horrible person. Sad day!

IIIII

_Wednesday_

"AHHHHHH!" Stupid ass computer! Why you want to leave me? I brought my laptop in so that I could transfer some data from my classroom computer and now my laptop suddenly froze in the middle of the transfer. Go technology.

"Is there something wrong Miss Amendier?" Kyoya's metallic voice sounded from somewhere beside me. I looked up and saw him standing with his notebook cradled between the crook of his elbow and forearm, his fingers poised on the tip of his classes.

"My computer just decided to descend into the ninth circle of hell."

"Ouran has a very knowledgeable Technical club. All of the students are children of prominent businessmen in the computer and technology field. They could probably have your computer back to you by the end of the day."

"Student Tech services only lead to porn and World of Warcraft being downloaded onto my computer, so I vote 'no.'"

"Present cynicism aside, I can take a look at it."

"Bahaha! Thanks. Just porn is better than both at any rate." I pulled over a chair and scooted over, letting him have my desk-chair. He shifted his glasses up and sat down, beginning to type away at the keys.

"Just so you know, I resent that remark."

"Are you sure you don't _resemble_ it?" I heard a guttural noise come from my student. Either he was growling at me or trying to laugh; I wasn't sure which.

"That comment does not need to be dignified with a response."

"And yet you just responded to it." Aw I loved playful banter, except for with Kyoya there was only playfulness coming from me, he was still iced over. Not like Kurt, who wasn't at Ouran _again_ today.

He was avoiding me. It was my fault, all my fault. What if he was dead? What if when he dropped me off and drove away he was careless and hit a lamppost or a tree and died on impact? What if he didn't die but was someone in a coma and the sound of my sweet melodious voice was the only thing that could wake him up?

"Clearly your daydreams are as incoherent as Tamaki's." Kyoya pushed up his glasses, the glint nearly blinding me. He just read my mind? No way! "Your computer is fine." He stood up and walked out of the room.

"Well thanks a heap, Satan." With as much demon there was in the twins, I couldn't help but spy an equal amount of devil in Kyoya. He was one of those odd people that are just inherently evil, but the production of that evil leads them to be decent human beings. It was a great contradiction when you thought about it on a literary level, but not so much when you are trying to converse with said people.

I tapped my nails on the desk. It was the end of the day. Where was that damn Kurt? I could try calling him, but I really would rather talk to him face to face. I don't think I could deal with being dropped off behind an alley and then hung up on. My fragile female soul couldn't take it. HA! Fragile. Ha. Ha. Ha. I made a funny.

I could go home right now, school is over and I have a plethora of movies that my mother had sent me once I told her I had my own place, including a few hopeless romantic ones that probably wouldn't help my current mood. Then again, I could always go up to the Host club. Their insanity might be just what I needed to get my mind off of the fact that I am a hopeless screw up who probably screwed up my one shot at being with a decent human being. Fuck me.

Oh well, here goes nothing. I walked down the corridor and up the stairs, opening the door of Music Room #3 and being hit by a wave of petals.

"Ame-san!" Honey ran towards me and jumped up at me. I knew how Haruhi felt whenever Honey did this to her because both of us are roughly the same height, though I am way more built and bulky than her, "Look, my tooth is all better!" Ah, that's right. I remembered that yesterday he came in with a bandage around his jaw. Poor little guy. Even though he was seventeen, his little body probably didn't take that much abuse. It was probably a good thing he was so strong because even I could probably snap his arm.

"Well, why don't you tell someone?" Honey grinned up at me and began running to Mori who was reading a book. I watched the two of them with interest when I saw Mori pull a Popsicle out from somewhere and shove it in Honey's mouth. He ran out of the way I had just come in, leaving Usa-chan at Mori's feet. Damn, I guess I influenced that.

"Hey, Haruhi, what is going on between Mori and Honey? I've never seen Mori act so cruel to him before."

"Honey has a cavity. Don't tell anyone this, but I think Mori has some alternative reason for doing this." She said, cupping her chin with her thumb and forefinger. I could almost see the wheels from her head turning over and over. I looked out of the corner of my eye and saw that Mori was staring at the double doors. He caught my glance and shifted his gaze back to his book. He was reading _Kokoro_ by Natsume Soseki. That book was considered his most seminal work, and he was considered the Charles Dickens of Japan, which is a great feat.

"Do you enjoy reading Japanese literature?"

"…" 

"I enjoy it too. Actually, I enjoy all literature. British is probably my favorite, though I have read quite a bit of Japanese literature. More of the historical stuff though. I really love Japanese history."

"Yeah. Me too." Words! He spoke words! I considered it a personal triumph when I got him to speak something.

"I like the Bakumatsu and the Meiji Restoration. Samurai's and Hitokiri. Awesome." I waved my hands in the air, pretending that I was swinging my sword into someone's jugular. Mori smiled at me then went back to his book.

I stood up when all of the other girls rotated and walked over to Kyoya who was standing by one of the pillars, writing whatever he writes down in his notebook.

"Thanks for fixing my computer. I appreciate it." Kyoya just nodded and forced his glasses up his nose with his middle finger and remained silent.

"So, how come you don't get any female customers? I was almost certain that someone would want to sit down with you and drink tea." Actually, I didn't really know of anyone that would want to do that. Did Kyoya even sit down and drink tea? I knew that he ate because he had eaten at my house, but you could tell that Pizza did not appeal to him in the least.

"As the manager of the Host club it is my duty to make sure that things run smoothly. The girls know this, and so they acknowledge my presence from afar but converse with our other hosts." I nodded towards him and watched his eyes shift back down to his notebook, his hand scribbling intensely.

Damn, this was boring.

"Kate-sempai, we'd like you to have this." Kaoru and Hikaru were suddenly right next to me. Karma was a bitch. I really didn't mean that I was bored. I promise! I closed my eyes and opened them. Shit, they were still there.

"What is it?" I narrowed my gaze as the twins leaned down and one of them extended his hand, opening it to reveal a piece of candy.

"Candy? I really don't want any…"

"CANDY!" Honey's sweet voice roared from the double doors as he came tearing at me.

"Holy Shit!" I screamed and began running as fast as I could to try and escape the bunny menace who was coming at me like a freight train.

Another one of those moments to just ponder how this had happened. Those stupid doppelgangers told me that they wouldn't do anything like this to me again. Damn those two twins! See if I ever trust those two foxes again.

"Mitsukuni! Stop!" I heard Mori yell. Well, it wasn't quite a yell, it was just a more intensified monotone grunt.

"CANDY!"

Honey yelled behind me as I booked it to the doors. How the hell was I supposed to know that that little cute thing would turn into a raving maniac because I had candy in my hand. He was like a drooling zombie chasing after me; except for the fact that he wanted the candy in my hands and not my brain.

"Help Me!" I screamed as the little bunny menace latched onto my leg and I went flying to the ground face first. I could feel his little hands trying to climb up my leg to get at where the candy was, so I did the only thing I could do. I neutralized the motivation for the attack on Kate. I unwrapped the candy and ate it.

"Oh no. Oh. He's so cute. Poor Honey!" I heard all of the fangirls cry. Damn moe senses. Poor Honey? He practically tore my leg off, and all they can say is 'poor Honey'? I sighed, turning over onto my back and looking up at the garish pink ceiling. I could hear the two twins chuckling hysterically while Mori, Haruhi, and all of the girls were circled around the crying Honey. Kyoya's eyeglass could be seen glimmering in the corner. He was obviously getting perverse pleasure from this.

"I'm sorry, Ame-sempai. Honey-sempai has really missed his sweets, which is why we chose to ban them for further notice." Tamaki's blond hair was hanging from his forehead as he extended his arm to me. I pulled myself off the ground with his help.

"Thanks. I'm sorry for bringing candy into the clubroom." I said innocently. The twins looked up at me with symmetrical expressions on their faces as they stopped laughing. That's right boys. I will kill you with kindness and then bury you with love. Six feet under.

"Would you like a cup of tea princess? A soothing cup of liquid may be just the thing to calm those frazzled nerves." Ugh. At least he wasn't laying it on as thick as he did with the girls. With a sigh I resigned myself to the fact that a cup of tea would probably help as I sat down across from Tamaki and he resumed his displays of affection.

"If this were the elegant court of love, then I could only wish to be your court jester."

"Oh wow, Tamaki. You're eyes sparkle so softly when you say that to me." I watched a girl melt into the cushion like crayons that were left in the backseat of a car on a hot day.

"They sparkle because they are reflecting the effervescent beauty that they are viewing in your eyes, my princess."

"OH Tamaki!"

"Kill me, just kill me now." I grumbled as I watched the scene before me. At least he gets points for using a word like effervescent. I didn't even know that word had a translation into Japanese until this point.

IIIII

_Thursday_

Kurt wasn't here again! I am so miffed. I can't believe that he would skip out on me again. Then again, it wasn't personal. Hell it wasn't. It was my own damn fault that he got so angry. Like Haurhi said, it was just my own fucking curiosity that made me ask, and now he was probably rotting in a ditch somewhere or on a plane to Fiji. Damn.

IIII

_Friday_

My Ihome would go off anytime now. I was just waiting for it. I spent another night up. This night I ate three pints of Phish Food ice cream while watching _Never Been Kissed_, _Ever After_, and all of the other horrible Drew Barrymore chick-flicks that were out there. At least watching them in Japanese was interesting, especially with _Ever After_.

_Hard to be sure  
Sometimes I feel so insecure  
And loves so distant and obscure  
Remains the cure _

Really Celine? You couldn't have picked another song to wake me up in the morning with? This was like the seminal cheesy single girl song. The one that you get overtly emotion with in movies with and are sitting on your couch with a myriad of snack foods and mascara running down your face with the tears

"All by myself, don't want to be all by myself anymore!" If you can't beat them, join them. Or as Tamaki would say, "when in Rome, do as the Romans do." I got up from bed and continued singing along, picking up my hairbrush from my dresser and singing into the lily painting.

"All by myself. Don't want to live all by myself. ANYMORE!" One long resounding note and I decided to just let Celine finish the song as I went into the shower, turning on the water, hoping that the next song on when I evacuated the shower would not dwell on what my mind had been dwelling on for the entire week.

_kogoeru arashi no yoru mo_

_mada minu kimi e tsudzuku_

_oshiete umi wataru kaze_

_inori wa toki wo koeru_

Rough Translation: I am alone but waiting for you while looking at the ocean, freezing my ass off, and praying for you to come back soon.

My iPod was trying to torture me today. I had been good all week! I had already blamed myself enough, figured out that Kurt probably hated me, and I had moved on. That's a lie, but at least I wasn't pining for him. I could function without him. It wasn't like I…you know…hearted him or anything.

I had both songs stuck in my head as I walked with Haruhi to Ouran, both of us completely silent. I was kind of curious how the rest of the club went, especially with how desperate Honey was for candy.

"Ame-san, I'm so sorry!" Honey glomped me when he game into the room, tears streaking down his eyes. I patted his head.

"I forgive you. I understand what it feels like to have something you enjoy ripped from you because you were careless enough not to keep it." Way to be subtle there Kate, and way to force your own inner demons on your student. Honey just smiled and walked to his seat. Morning classes went fine again. Just peachy keen.

The room was deserted at noontime recess, so I decided to take my lunch, including the almond cookies Haurhi had baked me (truthfully I had completely forgotten about them", and sit out by the awkward pee-fountain. I really didn't understand the purpose of having a peeing statue, but I guess when you are rich not much has purpose outside of pleasure.

"Can I join you, Kathrin?" I had just taken a bite out of one of the cookies, which were amazing, when I saw Kurt walk up the steps towards me and sit down next to me out of the corner of my eye. He was wearing black jeans and a grey t-shirt, and looked way less geeky that normal, but still oh so attractive.

"Please don't bother me while I am eating the most amazing cookies in the world." I probably shouldn't have said that; however, they were amazing cookies. I shoved the rest of the cookie in my mouth without fully looking at him.

"Are you trying to make me jealous?"

"Pretty much yeah."

"Look, I'm sorry for what happened Monday night. I overreacted"

"Where the hell do you come off? The first thing you do is apologize for what really was my fault to begin with instead of telling me where the fuck you have been these past few days?"

"Language."

Grrr…stupid man. I was better off when he wasn't her. Okay…I lied again.

"Didn't anyone tell you? This is the time of year where the Physics club goes to Italy to tour the places where Galileo conducted his experiments. I'm surprised Kyoya didn't let you know."

He was evil incarnate. Him and the twins. All of them should have horns, I kid you not.

"By the way, I tried calling and texting you when I was away. Honestly I was worried that you were incredibly angry with me and that was why you didn't answer, but when I got home I found that you had left your phone in your jacket, which was still hanging up in my parents house. Go figure." Kurt flashed me a smile as he handed me my folded jacket, my cell phone sitting on top of it. I grabbed it and noticed that I had thirty one new text messages from Kurt and one hundred and fifty four missed calls from Kurt.

"I am an idiot." I sighed, "because of my foolishness I will let you have a cookie made by Haurhi."

"I'd rather just have you, and pretend that none of this ever happened." He pulled me close to him and kissed me on the cheek.

"That was one of the most cliché things you could have ever said." I pulled away from him and slammed a cookie into his mouth. The trickling river of his laugh sounded as soon as he swallowed,

Whew…disaster averted.

"Speaking of cliché things, I heard that you attended the Host club this week. Had to fill up the void left by me with those young boys? I never pictured you as a cougar."

I opened my eyes wide before casually looking down at my feet and taking another bite of cookie, "Let's not talk about it."

IIIII

A/N – What is going to come next for our crazy linguist? Tune in next time for another chapter. I am actually planning on going off of the Alice and Wonderland parody from either the Anime or Manga, I haven't actually decided which seems more writer friendly. If you have any suggestions then let me know. I really want the next chapter to be quite hilarious, so again, any suggestions of situations you would love to see these characters in would be quite helpful. Thank you to KageNoNeko and Da Furr for being regular reviewers. I encourage you all to give me your feedback in reviews and such because that is what helps me become a better writer that can please you, my readers, more. Thanks and have a great day!


	15. Because It's Linguistically Relevant

Because It's Linguistically Relevant

"Twas brillig and the slithy toves/did gyre and gimbel in the wabe;/All mimsy were the borogroves,/and the mome raths outgrabe" I sang to the captive audience of my Introductory Linguistics class. Really, they were all looking at me like I was insane as I chanted the first stanza of Lewis Carroll's poem "The Jaberwocky." The only one of my students who seemed the least bit interest was Tamaki, who had a cheesy and semi thrilled smile on his face. Surprise, surprise.

"Does anyone have any idea why I am beginning our lesson on this b-e-a-utiful Friday afternoon?" I asked the class, folding my hands and leaning towards the front row of desks. It honestly felt good to stretch my English speaking muscles since I rarely spoke in it outside of my Advanced Grammar class and this one. The truthful, non-linguistic and more personal answer to that question would be that I was not expecting Kurt to show up today and decided to use my favorite thing to teach in order to lessen my own depression. Now that everything was as close to perfect as it could be, this just added to my day.

"No answers? Fine, I will tell you. This poem, though completely unintelligible to even a native English speaker's ear, is extremely linguistically relevant." I grinned at them before moving to my desk and grabbing a bunch of copies of the entire poem, handing them out. Once that was finished I hopped onto my desk, crossing my legs, and staring out at my students. This was going to be so fun…for me at least, "We have gone over the fact that each language has a way that sentences are put together. For a more familiar example, Japanese _basic_ sentence structure is Subject, Object, Verb. English structure is…?"

"Subject, verb, object." Ayame, one of the calmer and less fan-girly young women at this school, answered.

"Great. Every _basic_ English sentence will contain at least one subject and one verb. The object is optional though it may be there. Now why do I say that that is the _basic_ sentence structure?"

"Because there can also be numbers of adjectives, adverbs, verbals, prepositional phrases, adverbial phra…"

"Yes Ayame, very good." I was like her in high school. Whenever I talked my teachers interrupted me too. Though now I understand that it doesn't do much for your own teaching capabilities when you let a smart ass teach everything for you, "Now everyone, let's read this stanza again, shall we?"

Bahaha. A whole bunch of Japanese kids mispronouncing this poem as bad as a bunch of English kids was more funny than sad. Poor American education system.

"Alrighty, so, even though pretty much all of these words are not actually words, there is still some understandability in them. Let me read it again: 'Twas brillig and the slithly toves did gyre and gimbel in the wabe.'" What is the subject and its main verb of the sentence?"

"'It' is the subject and 'was' is the verb." Ayame answered again. Though she did so without raising her hand, just blurting the answer out. Tamaki and Kaoru both shrugged, bringing the hands that they had raised up in the air back down to their desk. Tamaki began staring out the window, and Kaoru began to flip through his linguistic book. At least I always raised my hand when I was a smart ass.

"So, Kaoru," I saw his amber eyes look up at me in surprise, so I gave him a small wink as I walked towards the desk in front of him that was empty, sitting down in the chair and facing him, "what fills the object slot of the sentence then? Is it 'toves'?

"'toves' is the subject of the dependent clause with 'slithy' is being used as an adjective modifying the 'toves. 'Brilig' is the object of the main clause, though I have no idea what it is referring to '" The twin responded to the question correctly, so I reached out and tapped his desk with my hands in the customary "great answer" teacher gesture, then walked over towards the windowsill by Tamaki's desk and sat down, making him dart his gaze away from outside and towards me.

"Then what about 'did gyre and gimbel in the wabe,' Tamaki Suoh?" I crossed my arms and stared into his blue-violet eyes.

"'did' is the tense marker for the compound verb 'gyre' and 'gimbel.' 'In the wabe' is a prepositional phrase. The entire verb phrase says what the 'toves' are doing while ''Twas brilig'" He placed his chin on the top of his hand and flashed me an overdone sideways glance. I laughed at him and moved towards the front of the class and sat down at my desk, noticing out of the corner of my eye that Ayame was clinching her jaw, her face turning a bright shade of red. I shrugged it off. If she was mad at me, she could stuff it because I am an equal opportunity teacher.

"Now that we have that as an example, I want you all to begin figuring out all the rest of the parts of speech and sentence structure of this poem. If you need help I will be up front, though I am sure that Miss Ayame and Misters Tamaki and Kaoru would be willing to help." Before I even finished those words the majority of the class stood up and split almost in half, gravitating to either Kaoru or Tamaki.

"Oh Tamaki, how do you know these things so well?"

"Because, a proper gentleman always knows proper speech, but if I was illiterate I would let your beautiful voice teach me." I shook my head at that blond haired player. He was a bit over the top, but still silky smooth.

"Kaoru, it's so great that you are in this class with us and know all of this information so well. Too bad Hikaru isn't here to see you." Another fangirl?

"It's okay. Hikaru and I curl up in bed together and tell one another about our day. We love to teach each other new things." I shook my head at the twin. Twincest when even alone. Mildly creepy, yes? I wonder if Kyoya knew about the charades outside of Music Room #3 that didn't make the club money. Ah, this was the perfect Friday.

_Bzzzzzzz_

Cell phone. I pulled it out of my pocket and flipped it open.

AME-SEMPAI, CAN THE HOST CLUB COME OVER TO YOUR HOUSE TOMORROW MORNING. I HAVE A GAME FOR ALL OF US TO PLAY.

I stared at the screen for a moment then looked up at Tamaki who, despite being very chatty with the girls flocked around him, was looking directly at me.

I GUESS SO. NOT TOO EARLY THOUGH. AND NO TEXTING IN MY CLASS!

I hit send and looked up at the Host king. I watched him laugh then look down at my text, quickly looking back up and giving me a toothy grin and a thumbs-up. Eh, why not. I didn't have anything else to do tomorrow. Besides, Kurt was coming over tonight so maybe I would persuade him to stay and be my guard dog against the crazy brigade that would be invading in the morning.

IIIII

"So why am I sleeping here again?" Kurt asked me as we lifted a sheet over the couch, protecting my leather. We had ended up watching the Disney version of _Alice and Wonderland_ after having a wonderful dinner, and now it was time to go to bed. I plopped down a pillow and a folded blanket on the couch as he readied himself for bed. This consisted of him taking his shirt off. Now one may think that I shouldn't react to this because I saw his bare-chested-ness at the beach, but the fact that he was half naked in my house made me start a bit. Possibly with a bit of pride, but definitely with a bit of pleasure. I am human after all.

"Because I need you to help protect me from the hooligans, so get some sleep." I pecked him on the cheek while watching him lay on the couch. He didn't fit. I should have realized that he was too large for a loveseat. I moved over to the kitchen, shrugging it off as I washed the dishes. Kurt kept tossing and turning, his legs flailing all over the place as he tried to get comfortable, "Come on doofus, you can sleep with me." I pulled the blanket off of him and headed off towards my bedroom.

"Is that an invitation?" Oh ho ho Mr. Hisugawa, way to throw a little bit of ambiguity in my words.

"Pervert." He ran up to me and grabbed me from behind, kissing my neck. Damn. Resist. Resist. Resist.

"I'm not a pervert. I am just male."

"Look you sexist bastardo. Just because I am female doesn't mean I don't have a fully functioning sex drive." I turned around and pushed him off to the other side of the bed, crawling between the sheets on my side of the bed, my back towards him.

"Was that _another_ invitation?" He whispered in my ear, his lips touching my earlobe. Resist temptation, Kathrin. Resist! Did you know that the ear is one of the body's erogenous zones? It is a proven fact. I turned onto my back; his grey eyes staring at me from above before bending down to kiss my collarbone.

"Aw hell with it." Resistance…is…futile.

IIIII

"I know things like this happen all the time," A familiar voice jumpstarted my brain. I couldn't open my eyes but I could tell that there was light coming from somewhere. Maybe this was just a dream.

"But it's just creepy when our teachers and parents do it." A similar but distinct voice to the first said.

"Good morning, Hisu-sempai. You must have slept well." The two voices said in unison. Shit…shit, shit, shit. This was no dream, this was a nightmare.

"Uh…Kate, Kate…wake up. The, uh, twins are here." I heard Kurt say to me as the large weight of a blanket covered my back as he shifted his weight, flipping the quilt off of himself. I didn't want to open my eyes. If I didn't open my eyes and pretended to stop breathing then they would all think I was dead, and they would disappear. Where was Southwest Airlines when you needed them? I want to get away!

"Hikaru, Kaoru, did you…" The icy breath of the Shadow King was expulsed in the room now. He chuckled a bit. I bet that this was just so freaking hilarious, isn't it Kyoya? Laugh it up, Satan, laugh it up.

"Uh, could you guys leave? Out, out, out!" I heard Kurt say as I felt his weight shift off the bed and heard his steps move towards where the doorway was. I wasn't coming out of this room for the entire day. No one could make me unless they promised me the entire world in a chocolate filled gift basket.

"Ame-sempai, it is time to wake up and grace the morning with your beautiful face!" I heard the bright and cheerful Host King's voice enter the room. I also heard a whole bunch of voices saying 'get out Boss' and 'you moron' in unison. I opened my mouth and bit down on the pillow.

"Tamaki-sempai, Kyoya-sempai, Hikaru, Kaoru, you guys can't just barge into someone's bedroom like this." Haruhi was adorable, but sometimes she could be just as dense as Tamaki. She was now in the room.

"You all just need to GET OUT right now!" Kurt grumbled.

"No. We said that we were doing this today and we are. Ame-sempai already agreed to it. We have had everything planned and gotten all of the preparations ready early this morning. So get out of bed, princess." Tamaki responded forcefully. I did say 'I guess so' yesterday, but that isn't really a definite yes or no answer. Is it?

"Why are you guys doing this to me?" I moaned into the pillow.

"Because it's linguistically relevant." The twin demon voices rose in harmony with one another. I loved linguistically relevant things at every time of the day except for now. Screw linguistically relevant.

"Fine. If you answer this riddle right then I will get up, but you have to promise me you will all _get out_!" I turned my head around and faced the teenagers. All of their faces looked expectant. It was really a good thing that I decided to put clothing back on before Kurt and I actually went to bed (by the way can I say that, despite the intrusion, I am extremely, radiantly, and boisterously happy?), "if you get it wrong we do this another time, alright?" All of them nodded, "Fine. Why is a raven like a writing desk?"

Thank goodness Lewis Carroll was a genius who came up with a riddle that had no answer. They would all be stumped and then they would all leave and I could go back to sleep, wake up later that day, and grab some much needed alcohol.

"Well because," Tamaki opened his mouth, his fingers snapping and breaking up the silence that didn't last quite long enough to satisfy me, "because Edgar Allen Poe wrote on both of them."

No fucking way? That riddle didn't have an answer! There was no recorded answer to it even on sparknotes when I read the book for the first time in college. There was no way that an imbecile like Tamaki would figure it out. I mulled it over in my head. Poe of course wrote on a writing desk, that was true, and Poe's most famous poem is called "The Raven." Tamaki was using the preposition 'on' to double as both meaning something on top of another thing and as the word 'about.' It _was_ linguistically relevant. AHHHHH! I never thought my profession would backfire on me!

"Miss Amendier. Mr. Hisugawa, please change into these outfits and meet us outside if you would please? Come on everyone, let's go see if Honey-sempai and Mori-sempai are finished yet" Kyoya's monotonous voice said "he may be a moron most of the time, but you should know that he is incredibly intelligent where it counts."

I watched them all follow Kyoya out of my bedroom like he was a mother duck. Kurt turned to look at me, grinning from ear to ear.

"It isn't fucking funny."

"Language." I stuck my tongue out at him and threw one of the pillows at him.

He just laughed, and continued laughing as he slipped into a white tuxedo shirt, black slacks, and a black frock coat. Meanwhile I stared down at what had been left for me to change into. A green bodysuit with what looked like leaves protruding from the waist and a white rose looking headpiece.

"I can't wear this." I said over and over again as I pulled the hideous, though form fitting and surprisingly comfortable, white rose cosplay up my body. Kurt just smiled at me and chuckled. Something in his eyes sparkled. I knew that gaze. It was the gaze the twins had perfected, the one of complete trickster-ness.

"You know what they are doing. Don't you?"

"Guilty, though I plead the fifth. Though you make a lovely white rose." He swayed up to me and grabbed me around the leaves, kissing my nose.

"I hate you. I really, really, hate you." I pouted as he grabbed me by the hand and dragged me through the sliding glass door to the back patio.

Sunlight bad. Darkness good. I flinched, waiting for my eyes to adjust. When they did, I saw that there was a random full grown oak tree that just miraculously appeared in my backyard. I looked further down and there were two very familiar looking girls. One was reading a book and the other was watching. I don't remember every meeting two twin girls anywhere before. Wait a minute…those two weren't twin girls…

"Uh…what's going on?"

"Once upon a time," Kurt's deep baritone said in answer to my question, "far, far, away, there lived the cutest twin girls in the world named Alice."

"Tamaki Suoh! What the hell is…" I tried to yell at the brains of the outfit, but he already had both Hikaru and Kaoru by the collars. I heard the words 'bastards,' 'your daddy,' and 'you're not cute.

"I don't understand these rich people either. This is really taking cosplay to a whole new level." Haruhi, sweet, understanding, intelligent, brave, Haruhi. She was now sitting next to me on a bench that also miraculously appeared in my backyard.

"And who decided that the Hitachiin's would be Alice? You're the girl, you should be Alice."

"For once that decision didn't come from Tamaki. Those two decided that I wouldn't make a good Alice because I would rather sit under the tree and read than follow a rabbit down a hole. I'd rather be doing chores than doing this, to tell you the truth. I have laundry to do." Haruhi rolled her eyes and I nodded. I _completely_ understood where she was coming from. Though, it was true that if one was going to go along with this insane role play, Alice wasn't a character that really suited the Host club heroine.

"While they were spending the summer afternoon relaxing under a shady oak tree, Alice A and Alice B saw a strange sight." Kurt narrated again. I can't believe that Kutano Hisugawa was in on this whole thing from the start. Why did I ever think that he would protect me from the insanity? I'm a bad judge of character.

"Is that Honey?" I pointed at something running across the lawn with bunny ears, a waistcoat, and a pocket watch. Haruhi nodded which confirmed my suspicions. I heard both of the twins say something to one another super dramatically and tear after Honey, who knelt down and crawled into the living room using an oversize dog door. How the hell did that get there? I don't have a dog.

"Come on, I can't hear what's going on." Haruhi grabbed my wrist and pulled me with her. She just didn't want to be alone with this insane people any more than I did. There was a small bottle on the floor near the dog door and one of the twins picked it up. It was even harder to tell them apart when they had long hair.

"I'm not going to try this Alice A. It's not worth the risk."

"Well, Alice B, what do you think we should do?"

They looked at me, both of them, and winked. I backed up, scared they were going to do something to me when they turned around and attacked Tamaki.

"What do you idiots think you are doing?" I heard Tamaki scream as he failed to get out of the twins' grasp.

"Taking some poetic license!" The two of them said together and in only a few minutes (I know, fast turnover) Tamaki was now in the same dress that the twins were still in, a little bow perched on the top of his yellow hair. Haurhi and I both stifled a laugh as he looked down at his new costume.

"Aw come on Tamaki. You didn't mind dressing up like a girl to keep Haruhi from going to Lobelia." I cooed, earning a pout from Mr. Suoh.

"He just doesn't like it because this time it wasn't _his_ idea." Haruhi said matter of factly. She was right.

"Amendier." Mori's deep voice called my attention to it and I looked up, cranking my neck back so that I could see the jolly green giant, "Come with me"

"Hey! Put me down!" I growled as I was lifted in the air over Mori's shoulder as he walked back towards my bedroom. I was being kidnapped at my own house. My life was hell. My life was hell because it was hell inside Tamaki's head. His brand of hell had now become my existence. Lovely.

"Ame-san! You look so cute as a flower!" Honey flapped as he placed his hands on my back, steadying me as Mori set me on the ground, my flower bonnet smacking him in the nose. We were in my living room which had been transformed into a garden. I seriously hoped that the plants on top of my couch weren't real. If they were there was going to be a smackdown up in here.

"Script," Mori grumbled, handing me a piece of paper. I hung my head and walked over to a random tree stump placed in the middle of the couches, sitting down.

"And so, in a strange turn of events, Alices A and B turned over their role to Alice C, and this new Alice trudged into a spooky forest. This is how Alice C's adventures started." Kurt's voice got louder as he entered the room and leaned against the wall; the twins had miraculously disappeared, though I could swear I felt two pairs of eyes glaring at me from somewhere in the house.

"Why in the world would Tamaki make a good Alice? Why the heck did you even plan this?" I placed my hands on my leaves while scratching my pedals. Good God, I hope this never _ever_ happens to me again.

"You're a flower." Tamaki observed. Wow. As if you didn't have a hand in planning this.

I just glared, dropping the paper script from my hand. If you can't beat them, join them. I feel like that is becoming my new motto.

"What's an ugly flower like you doing in my forest?" Might as well play along. At least the flowers in the book were kind of bitchy. It worked for me.

"I'm not a flower. My name's Alice, and I'm a man!" Tamaki shouted, throwing his body forward. I saw Kurt smile at Tamaki's brashness, and I almost wanted to laugh myself.

"Dude, if you are a man than be a man and stop dressing like a woman. It's _not_ attractive."

"But Ame-sempai, you don't think that I look cute?" Tamaki's eyes were watering as he brought his finger up to his lip, starting to pout.

"Tamaki, don't take this the wrong way, but when you dress like a woman it's just kind of creepy. The twin's kind of look cute that way, but you just look like a dork." Oh hell. He went into his damn corner, which was underneath my dining room table. I rolled my eyes. Unfortunately, despite his moronic tendencies, Tamaki had quickly become one of my favorite people. Despite all of the things, especially the fact that he was the igniting flame of my own personal hell, he just had something special. Deranged, but special, "What now?"

"Pick up the script." Haurhi whispered to me from next to where Kurt was standing against the wall. I sighed and bent down to pick up the script.

"The black queen is so horrible to us. Even though we hate the queen what can a mere flower like me do?" Gag. Who wrote this crap?

"I'll try and save you! Explain more about the black queen!" Tamaki got over his slump, crawling out from under the table and kneeling in front of me, gallantly extending a hand towards me. All of a sudden Kyoya came out of the downstairs bathroom, a black long haired wig atop his head and the purple gown from when they showed that femi-nazi Benio who was boss.

"On second thought, I resign," Kyoya pushed up his glasses, his eyes faced in Tamaki's direction, producing this forfeit from the Host king. I couldn't help it, I laughed.

"Kyoya, you are probably one of the sexiest looking queens I have ever laid eyes on." I walked to my room, ignoring the looks that I was getting from the rest of the Host club and the glare I was getting from the Shadow King. Shutting the door I changed out of the rose costume and into jeans and a white long-sleeve t-shirt, then walking back into the other room, "You guys amuse me so much. You should seriously do this in front of the girls. They would get a kick out of it. Hahahah!"

"Are you done playing with us Ame-san?" Honey asked, his eyes slightly downcast.

"Yeah, at least with this game. Besides, it's nearly one o-clock. It's time for lunch. Let's go somewhere. My treat." I watched as the boys as they changed out of their clothes. Just to clarify, I am not a creeper. They just all had normal clothes on underneath the cosplay, even Kurt! I really didn't understand how they could have their everyday clothes under their cosplay, seamlessly changing between casual dress and costume dress. Crazy people. Maybe it's a Japanese thing.

"Hey, you guys, where did the twins go?" Haruhi asked as we headed outside of the front door. I stepped onto the front step, Tamaki right behind me.

"And the mome raths outgrabe! Mrow"

"Ahhhh!" I screamed in tandem with Tamaki as the twins, both of them dressed as Cheshire cats and with huge sadistic grins on their faces, leapt down from somewhere and landed behind Tamaki, making him jump forward and straight into me. The both of us flying down the steps and landing in a crumpled heap on the floor. Those two dreaded twins laughing their little heart's content. You can laugh now, but I'll get you next time you stupid cats. I'll get you next time.

IIIII

A/N – So…yeah…I hope this was a good and funny chapter. I kind of wanted it to be funny, so I hope it turned out that way. Don't forget to review and tell me what you liked, what you didn't like, what you wish would have happened. Cha. Hope you had fun. I hope to finish this story during the summer, and I am thinking of writing another Ouran fic about the twins first year in the club, since when Haruhi joins it is their second year and I am curious as to what shenanigans the twins got into since they were way warped


	16. Sayonara For Now, Ouran Academy

Sayonara Ouran Academy

"Chairman, you wanted to see me?" I knocked on the door of his office, entering when I saw him nod his head as he stood and moved to a tea-table and two chairs. One of the history teachers had told me that the Chairman was looking for me when I went to the teachers' lounge after meeting with the Choir Club.

"Yes, Kathrin, please come and join me. Tea?" I nodded in thanks as the Chairman poured a cup for me and set it before me. Honestly, I had absolutely no idea what this was about. The last time I had spoken with the Chairman was when he had observed my class, but he escaped before the class period was over, so I didn't get a chance to talk to him, "How are you enjoying Japan, my dear?"

"I like it just fine, sir. I get homesick from time to time, but the students are great. I am enjoying myself." Enjoying was kind of a strong word. I loved it here, it was true, but everyday was filled with more and more insanity.

"You've been here since the beginning of the first trimester, and now that first trimester will be finished this Wednesday. You must be fairly accustomed to life at Ouran Academy by now."

"It is a wonderful school, Chairman." Was his purpose just to make polite conversation with me? I would have known if he did this with all of his teachers, wouldn't I have? Maybe he was just concerned about how I was doing. No, he was too important for that. The only reason I saw him a second time after arriving here was because Tamaki was his son and a student of mine, so there was definitely something behind this one, "Sir, what is this _really_ about? You can cut the pretense."

"I can see there is no fooling you, Kathrin. I summoned you here for a reason and, frankly, I do not like that reason. However, the Suoh family's standing must be upheld. It has been a pleasure having you teach at this institution. You are truly one of the brightest women that I have met, and your passion for your academia and your students has shown; however, you will not be returning to Ouran as one of our faculty for the remainder of this year. For this I am truly sorry."

"What?" What the fuck? I was being fired? I hadn't done anything wrong. There was no way that this could be happening to me.

"Kathrin, unfortunately the decision to terminate your position did not come from me. If it did there would be some real reason for letting you go."

"Then tell me, _sir_" I spat as I stood up and leaned towards the Chairman, "Why am I being 'let go?'"

"It has come to the attention of the board of trustees that your methods of teaching are not only strange but are somewhat unacceptable for an academy of this caliber. There is talk among parents that you are not providing challenges enough for their children, hindering their ability to succeed in the English speaking realm. Also, there are reports of complaints about the caviler and unprofessional way that you interact with your students, and that the lines between teacher and student have been blurred in your classroom. While these are sufficient for the board of trustees to ask for your resignation and for the Suoh family's legacy in school management to be called into question by the trustees, I am in the unfortunate position of letting go one of the finest instructors we have had at this Academy in many years. If I were to express this settlement in English, I would say that I am between a 'rock and a hard place.'"

He spoke to me straight and honestly, so I sat back down. Stunned into silence, which doesn't happen very often. I hadn't made plans to go back to the states until this time next year once the third trimester was over and graduation had happened, but what was I supposed to do now?

"Sir, I am sorry for…"

"Kathrin, my dear, do not be sorry for anything. If anyone should be sorry, it should be me. I was the one who petitioned the board to allow for your hiring in the first place, and I should have known that a young woman from America would not be able to escape the tight political grasp of the Japanese aristocracy. Since next Wednesday is quite sudden for your termination, I have asked the board to allow you to continue as the director of the Choir club, and I still have it in the budget to pay you for the second and third trimester."

"I won't take money when I am not working for it, Chairman." It was tempting to, especially since I now had a mortgage to take care of. At least a few more months of being with the Choir club would give me time to get everything in order. What was I going to do?

"Very well then. I will still pay you for your services as director, and you will still receive your normal salary over the summer break as any first trimester teacher would." He nodded towards me forcefully. Chairman Suoh was going to make me take the offer whether I felt right taking it or not.

"Yes, Sir." I folded my hands in my lap and stared down at them before standing up, "Thank you, sir. Have a great day."

"Father!"

"Chairman Suoh!" Two voices yelled simultaneously as two bodies barreled through the door and past me like a jet turbine.

"Is what Kyoya said true, Father? Are you getting rid of Ame-sempai?" Tamaki was standing in front of his father.

"It's not fair, Sir," Kurt walked up and stood next to Tamaki. The two of them were glaring at the Chairman. I almost felt bad for him because what Kurt's eyes lacked in raw emotion, they made up for in intensity while Tamaki's eyes were over-emotional and lacked any type of mature intensity. Not to mention the difference between a glowing amethyst and a smoking grey was quite powerful. They made a good albeit frightening pair.

"Tamaki, Kutano, the decision has been made by more people than myself. Kathrin and I have talked it over and have reached an agreement that, though it is still in my opinion unfair, will work for the time being." The chairman remained cool and calculated in his words, and at the end the two intruders looked at me. Damn those eyes.

"It's okay." Lie. It wasn't okay, "I am still going to be at Ouran after the summer break. It isn't as if the world is ending." Lie. It was. I wanted to teach these kids. I wanted to teach at this school. I wanted everything that I had right now, and I didn't want anything to change. I wanted something for the first time in my sorry ass life, and now that I wanted it, it was going to be ripped away, "Everything will work out fine." Lie.

"Father, you have the power to veto the boards decisions. Why can't you do it now?" Tamaki turned back towards his father. Clearly the Chairman loved his son, and clearly the Chairman knew that what his son said was true to a certain extent, but I could see in his eyes and remember from his words to me earlier, that something was preventing him from taking that power and using it for my benefit.

"Tamaki, you know that it is not that simple. It was not just myself that the trustees brought their proposition to; it was also to your grandmother. You know that I cannot challenge her authority."

I was surprised. It looked as if Tamaki had been slapped in the face by his father's words, even though they weren't even necessarily directed towards him. The teenager had his hands balled into fists at his sides. I had never seen him react this way towards anything before. Who the hell was this woman?

"Sir, there has to be something, _anything_, that you can do." Kurt pleaded, slamming his fist on the Chairman's desk.

"Kutano. The decision is made. Now please, an important family client will be in my office shortly and I need the space vacated. Kathrin, once again, I would like to express my apologies. If ever you need anything, please don't hesitate to contact me." The Chairman flashed me a smile and I gave him a small one back before being dragged out the door by Kurt. Tamaki following us.

"Ame-sempai, are you alright?" Tamaki bent down so that he was stairing into my face, his hands placed on my shoulders. I nodded, but he shook his head before walking off to the lunchroom. Once again his power to see through people had activated.

"Damn it. That really pisses me off." Kurt yelled, slamming the wall with his fist, repeating the gesture he made in the office.

"I'm pretty sure I just heard you curse the most I've ever heard you curse before. I vote you do it more." I said it light heartedly, but really it was somewhat unnerving to hear. He looked at me and sighed, running his hand up to his neck and squeezing slightly. I had seen him to that before too. Softly I ran my hand along his back, "Kutano, you are really tense." I could feel his muscles clenching under my hand.

"Sorry."

"There's nothing to be sorry for. It's not your fault that your muscles decided to go 'chomp chomp' on your shoulder blades."

"No, I'm sorry for what happened back there. I just can't believe that old tart had a hand in this. She is such a horrible woman."

"Who is she?" I asked. Kurt just shook his head and put his arm around me and pulling me into a hug.

"Can I come over tonight? I need to talk to you." Kurt kissed the top of my head as I pulled away and nodded. He grinned and walked off to the classroom he was going to be teaching in next. I shook my head and walked towards my own classroom.

What was I going to do? Now that I didn't have a job here come a few weeks after the end of summer, would it be better for me to find a job here or to go back home and pretend that none of this had ever happened. What would that do to everyone else? What would it do to me? It would almost be better to just go home. These people were so high-strung and emotionally unstable, not to mention clinically insane at times.

"Are you really leaving us Ame-san?" Honey ran up to me, clutching Usa-chan so tightly that it looked like even the stuffed rabbit was going to suffocate.

"Good news certainly travels fast." I said, giving Honey one of the brightest smiles I could muster, meaning that it probably had the luster of newly harvested coal, "Honey, I'm not leaving. I'm just…"

"Leaving" the twins continued, both of them standing next to Honey, each of them with one hand on their waist and another propped on the boy lolita's shoulders. I sighed and went over to my desk, sitting down and messing around with the papers on my desk, waiting for everyone to leave. Eventually Hikaru and Honey left, Kaoru went to his desk for Intro to Linguistics.

"Is there a reason you keep staring at me, Kaoru?" I looked up from my desk, folding my hands and staring straight at the twin.

"Kate-sempai, are you going to leave after this?" kaoru asked as he got up and walked towards my desk, kneeling on the floor and folding his hands over the top of the desk, leaning his cheek on his forearm, "Would it be better for you to find a job here and allow everything to continue as it has been, or would it be better for you to go home to America and continue where your life left off? I think that if you want to put a spell on the carriage and stay, everyone would appreciate you for it even though it may be easier to go back to the United States."

"Put a spell on the carriage? What are you talking about, Kaoru?"

"It's just something that I've been thinking about. The boss things of all of us in the Host club as his family, and I am sure that you have come to be included in that family. I am just wondering if you are going to keep things from changing that dramatically and find a way to stay with us, or if you are going to leave and separate yourself from us." Kaoru pushed himself up with his hands, his amber eyes looking down at me. His eyes looked so sad all of a sudden, and I didn't think it was just because of me either. I had never heard Kaoru talk this seriously unless he was answering a question about bilabial nasals ([m] sound) or velar stops ([k] sound). Usually he was goofing around with Hikaru, trying to make mine or someone else's life a living hell.

"What a silly question. Of course I am going to stay here, and if I decide to leave then you will be one of the first to know. I promise." He grinned and nodded in affirmation, returning to his desk and flipping through his Linguistics textbook. The rest of the students were coming into the classroom and class needed to begin soon. The student's final exams were tomorrow; today was just going to be review. Wednesday they would all get their class rank based on all of their final exams, glad to be off for summer break, while I would bid farewell to this classroom forever.

IIIII

_Face down, this is where it leads you. Too far._

_Buried, covered now, you'll find peace in the earth aground._

"What are you thinking about?" I asked Kurt as he sat on the barstool across from where I was cooking linguini on the stove. His mind was preoccupied with something, and I would hazard a guess that he was thinking about the same thing that I was thinking about. I was cooking and we were listening to music, neither one of us saying much.

_Stop now, there's no point in breathing. It's not allowed. _

_On the surface, how can you find reason to move on?_

"Let's go somewhere. Get out of here for a month or more. We could go to Karuizawa. I heard from Hotaru that here is a nice pension there, and I am sure that if I booked a room now we would definitely get in. What do you say?"

_Until then you can runaway;_

_Do your best to hide your face._

"How can you think of vacationing now? I need to save up as much money as I can right now so that I can keep my options open. Plus, I need to pay my mortgage. I don't want to be indebted to Kyoya Ootori because I can't pay for a house that his family technically owns."

_Oh I know you best, I know you get what you get_

_You get what you deserve._

"Why don't I move in with you? That way I can pay mortgage. Besides, I'm thirty-one and still living on my parents land. I gotta become a man sometime. Plus, now that you don't technically work for Ouran Academy, the fact that we are sleeping together isn't taboo anymore"

"Ah I see, so really you just want to be around more often for easier access." He laughed at me and I laughed back. It felt good to laugh. All of my afternoon classes had dragged by, and I caught both Tamaki and Kaoru stare at me throughout Linguistics, and even Kyoya looked up more at me from his black book during German.

_Hush now, yeah don't say a word it's out in the open_

_And tell me, how can you deal with all this weight?_

"I'm serious Kate. Getting away from here would be a great thing for the both of us. I am sure that Stephanie, Yuuka, or Ruuya, would watch the place while we are gone. And as for me moving in, it would be a way to make it easier for you to stay in this house."

"Translation: 'It would be easy for me to shag you.'"

"Kate. You know what I mean." I chuckled and threw a noodle at him.

"Check if this is done enough for you." I did know what he meant. If Kurt moved in then it would be harder for me to decide on going back to America than to decide to find another job in Japan. It was Kurt's way of, how did Kaoru say it, "putting a spell on the carriage." I shook my head at the twin's wisdom as I lifted the pan off the stove and went to drain it.

"Ow. Fuck." Damn pan. It slipped out of my hands and the backside hit my forearm. I finished draining the noodles and placed the pan back on the stove before checking my arm, "Dammit."

"Are you okay, Kate? Here, do this." Kurt quickly walked to where I was standing, pulled my arm over to the sink and stuck my arm under the faucet as he turned on the cold water. It stung a bit at first, but then I looked up at Mr. Hisugawa, who was staring down at the water, seemingly transfixed.

_Speak now; you must have a secret kept down,_

_Down where you can keep it. I need you to spill your guts_

"Dude. You must have that vacationing thing on your mind because you didn't tell me to watch my language right now." I pulled my arm out from under the water and from his grasp, grabbing the strainer filled with noodles, pouring them into the pot with simmering marinara sauce and meatballs.

"Today was one of the first days since I carelessly dropped you off in that alleyway that I've been legitimately angry. I usually try not to get that way, and I'm sorry if anything I did or said today made you freak out or anything."

"Kurt, the only thing that made me freak out today was the fact that I don't have a job anymore because my merit is based on some overtly political businessman code and not how good I am at my job. It's not like it didn't make me angry too. And you don't have to feel like you owe me an explanation for anything, we already talked about that." Was I going to finally figure out the secret of the mysterious Kutano Hisugawa and his apparent anger issues? Just because I said that he didn't owe me an explanation, and that was a genuine feeling, it didn't mean that I didn't want to know.

_Until then you can runaway;_

_Do your best to hide your face._

_Oh I know you best; I know you get what you get_

_You get what you deserve_

"This is part of the reason I think getting away from everything would do the both of us good. Plus my anger management therapist said that one of the steps to remaining calm was to take time away from things that anger you. Right now, Ouran angers me." Kurt came up behind me, winding his arms around my torso and setting his chin down on my shoulder.

"You see that therapist?"

"I used to. I was court mandated to go to anger management during high school instead of jail because I broke a few of a classmates ribs, as well as his nose and ankle because he was trying to fondle Ruuya. It wasn't the first time I had done something of that nature, just all the previous times didn't end in the other person needing severe medical treatment." I pulled his arms from around me and turned to face him, cocking my head. There was no fucking way that Kutano Hisugawa, the man I knew to be as soft as a foam mattress had the ability to beat someone up like that. Then again, I guess if Honey could be as great of a weapon as he is, then Kurt could be. It was just really suprsing.

"You've gotta be shitting me."

"Language. And no, I'm not. I am prone to aggression. It's something I work on. You may have seen me grab my neck; it is kind of a trained response to anger so I don't act out. Part of the reason I didn't want to tell you right away and was so livid when you asked me about my 'anger issues' in the car was because you had talked about your ex-boyfriend and your father being violent. I thought if I told you I was prone to anger then you would leave me like my ex did."

_Speak now; you must have a secret kept down,_

_Down where you can keep it. I need you to spill your guts_

Hell, he was deeper than I would have imagined, "Look, Kurt, just because I have violent people in my past means that I am attracted to men with tempers. Let me ask you something. When you get angry and feel like you want to hit someone, and we all have those feelings from time to time, do you ever act out on it?" He shook his head 'no,' "And when I have made you angry did you yell at me or want to hit me?" He shook his head again. Seriously, the power of my mind to reason was incomparable. I was so damn awesome, "You are not my ex and you are nothing like my father. Don't worry about me. What you did to that guy in high school was done out of protection. You may be prone to anger and aggression, but that doesn't mean you are violent, and I think that Hotaru is wrong when he says that you have 'anger issues' because everyone has them. In the car, you think you over-reacted but if you remember the beach, I basically clawed you to death. I over-reacted more than you. So thank you for telling me, but there is no way that you could ever change my mind about how I feel about you."

I was forceful, but he needed to hear it. He was nothing like my father. I don't think Kurt could ever really hurt anyone unless he was provoked. He was just one of those people who thought something was wrong with him because some psychoanalyst told him there was. More importantly than that, hearing his story meant that I _really_ wasted those three days for nothing.

_Until then you can runaway;_

_Do your best to hide your face._

_Oh I know you best; I know you get what you get_

_You get what you deserve_

"So do you want to go to Karuizawa? It's my treat, and I would make sure that we had a wonderful time together. We can even get two separate rooms if that would make you feel more comfortable. I just want you come with me." He changed the subject. He was hanging out with me way to much. But, what he said made me smile.

"One room is fine. It'll be a good test to see if we can actually live with one another." I dipped my finger into the sauce and painted the tip of his nose with it, smiling.

Despite everything that happened today, I was glad that I had him.

"Who's at the door?" I asked as the doorbell rang. When I opened the door, I was met with seven gorgeous faces staring up at me, each one of them holding their books, "What do you guys want?"

"Ame-sempai, would you bestow upon us your bountiful knowledge this evening in reviewing with us some concepts of English Grammar?" Tamaki bowed slightly.

"Fine, come it." I narrowed my eyes and mumbled, holding the door open so that the entire Host club could enter.

"It smells really good in here." Kaoru said as he walked over towards the couch and sat down.

"Almost like it does near our cottage in Venice" Hikaru continued as he sat next to his brother, both of their heads following me towards the kitchen, sickening smiles on their faces.

"How come you guys always show up when it is time to eat? Don't you all have chefs at home?" I growled as I found seven more dishes. It was a good thing that I had cooked enough for leftovers the rest of the week. I guess I wouldn't have leftovers now.

"Ame-san, it's because you're a good cook! You are almost like one of our chefs!" Honey said innocently, clearly not meaning to offend me whatsoever.

"Fine, everyone come fix your plates and make sure that there is enough for _everyone_." I said as the Host club thanked me as they all rushed into the kitchen. I glared at Kurt who was laughing to himself, enjoying my torture.

"Kate-sensei, don't forget your promise. Everything is fine right now, the way it is. Don't let the magic leave." Kaoru whispered, almost threateningly, in my ear as he walked past me.

I wouldn't worry about it, Kaoru. I don't think that anything could ever happen to make me leave this permanently. Nothing in the world.

IIIII

A/N – So a little bit more serious, but it was necessary. Next time we will catch Kate, Kurt, and Host club in Karuizawa, which should be rather hilarious. I hope it is at least. The song in this chapter is "Runaway" by Cartel. Don't forget to review, review, review!


	17. A Baby, A Corset, and the Host Club

A Baby , a Corset, and the Host Club…Ah hell!

"Move 'em on, head 'em up. Head 'em up, move 'em on. Move 'em on, head 'em up. Rawhide!"

"Kate, do you really have to sing that?"

"Rollin', rollin', rollin' Kurt, keep that pick-up rolling. Rollin', rollin', rollin'. Rawhide!"

"Kathrin Joy Amendier. If you don't shut-up I am going to trade you for someone in Hotaru's car." Kurt was getting sassy, and I liked it. We were on our way to Karuizawa. It was almost a three hour drive to get there. Yuri, Hotaru, Ruuya, and Yuuka had decided to take time off from work to come up to spend the day with us today. They were following us up there in Hotaru's black Hyundai. It was just so asian, so perfect.

I am glad that I said yes to this. Now that we were driving, it excited me that we were finally going to be able to relax, and that I was going to spend the time with Kurt. It would be a relaxing month. I wouldn't have to worry about the fact that now I was legitimately out of work except for the two hours I was going to spend with the Choir club everyday to get ready for the School fair. On this vacation though, nothing was going to bother me.

"'On the road again, I just can't wait to be on the road again.'" I sang, switching songs.

"Kate."

"'I'm leaving on a jet plane; don't know when I'll be back again'" Hehehe. I'm a bitch.

"Kathrin. Joy." Kurt glared at me out of his peripheral vision, playfully smacking my leg simultaneously.

"I am bored." I hung my arm out the open window, setting chin on it. It was good that I would be getting away from everything. Getting away from all of the insanity connected with the Host club and away from Ouran entirely was a good thing. I had gotten an e-mail explaining my termination even further. Apparently he didn't even understand the real reason why I was ousted, just the political pretence. Ce la vie, "What is your most embarrassing moment?"

"What? Where did that come from?"

"I said I was bored. Besides, if we are going to be living with one another we should know these things." I shrugged and grabbed his hand with mine.

"I don't really remember this every happening, but Hotaru, Yuuka, and my mother swear that it happened. Apparently when I was eight years old my parents were having a party for their colleagues, and I ran into the grand foyer completely naked, covered in mud, yelling 'I'm a bear. Rawr!'"

"Bahahaha! You are the most amazing thing since sliced bread. You know that right?" I can just imagine little Kurt running through the house screaming 'Boku wa kuma' over and over and over again. It was a wonderful picture that would be burned into my brain until I was old and gray. I had a feeling that Hotaru and Yuuka would be two of the best people to talk to about these kinds of blackmail-happy moments of Kurt's life.

"Now it's your turn. Tell me one of your most embarrassing moments."

"Where do I start? I have had my fair share of embarrassing moments since arriving here. The worst being the other day when our students walked in on us in bed together. I nearly had a heart attack. It was even worse because you helped them plan everything." I poked him in the side, making him jar a little bit in his seat. He smiled and laughed his river-like laugh, squeezing my hand.

"Come on then, you have to have something else."

I thought about it for a moment. Most of the things I have done in my life that have made other people laugh and made myself blush, were just me being myself. I was just an embarrassment (in the best way possible) so most of the things that I did that would be considered embarrassing for other people, for me it were just normal everyday occurrences.

"Well, it isn't really a 'haha' type of embarrassment. But the first time that I went to the ocean after my sister's death, I freaked out when I ran with my friends into the water. As soon as my feet hit the surf, I started crying and screaming. I had just turned twelve and started middle school. It was probably the most uncool thing I could have done, but I've been afraid of swimming ever since. That was embarrassing." He started running his thumb over the top of my hand, his touch comforting me. The beginning of my stay here had me thinking and depressing myself over what had happened to me, something I had spent my life repressing. Now it didn't bother me as much as it did before, that was probably because of Kutano, Haruhi, and the boys of the Host club. In the beginning, their sincerity was met by my cynicism, but now it was something that sustained me. Though it did feel like hell now and again.

"I think that it's about time that you conquered your fears, Kate. I think that it's time you embrace the water again. I'll help you. It'll be like learning how to swim, but from someone who loves you."

"As long as you're wearing a leopard print Speedo, and I am mildly intoxicated, I think I could be up for that." Humor equals compensation. What would really be the harm in it though? I supposed that since I am twenty-six it's about time that I swim again.

"That's disgusting." Kurt cringed. I didn't see what was so disgusting about it. He was sexy, especially with his hair down. His black hair was silky, and it was feathered and layered to perfection. Usually I hated it when a guy had better hair than I did, but possession is nine tenths of the law, and Kurt was _alllll_ mine.

"I don't think it's nasty. You have an amazing ass."

"Language. Thank you."

"What _is_ your obsession with cursing? I've thought about it before, but now I'm going to say it: you have a serious cuss-dar." He jerked his head towards me, his eyebrow raised and confusion written all over his face, "It's like a gay-dar for people who hang out with primarily gay people and can usually tell in a big crowed who is gay and who isnt, except you have a cuss-dar. A radar for curse words. I want to know what's up with that."

"For me, cursing has always been associated with anger. I don't like hearing it because whenever I curse I end up getting angry at the world, and when I get angry it is like a typhoon."

"Like with that guy in high school." He nodded. I guess that made sense to me. I cursed when I was angry, but I also cursed out of habit. I still didn't really think that Kurt was aggressive by nature, just prone to get angry over situations that some people would only be upset at. No biggie.

"So let me ask you a question, Kate. What did Ruuya and Yuuka give you that made you blush and shove in your suitcase?"

"Uh…what are you talking about? They didn't give me anything. Are you feeling okay? You don't have a fever do you?" I reached over and felt his forehead. He grabbed my wrist and pushed it down, glancing at me to the side again with a horrible 'you can't hide anything from me' grin.

_Kkkeeeeersshhh_

"Come in Obi-wan, this is Han Solo. Come in Obi-wan. Over." Hotaru's voice called over the walky talky that was in the doorway of the pick-up truck.

"Hello Han Solo, this is Obi-wan. What's up? Over." I ignored the intermittent and confused looks that Kurt was giving me. I was actually really glad that I couldn't answer that question. Ruuya and Yuuka were actually the deliverers of a very awkward present that the twins had made for me.

"Princess Leia needs to use the facilities. Obi-wan Kenobi, you're our only hope. Over." I laughed and put the walky talky back where I got it from.

"Yuri needs a pee break. Pull over as soon as you can." Kurt took a heavy breath, breathing it out slowly as he took the next off-ramp.

"So if you're Obi-wan, Hotaru is Han Solo, and Yuri is Leia, who am I?"

"Chewbacca. Get me some gummy worms, kay." I patted Kurt's shoulder softly and patronizingly, smiling at him before opening the car door and jumping out, following Yuri to the restroom at the gas station while Kurt walked off to the grocery mart. Who knew they had these things in Japan? Wow, that sounded completely ethnocentric.

"I heard about you losing your job. Just know that if you need anything Hotaru and I are just a phone call away." Yuri said as we reached the restroom. Can I just say that it is still really awkward to talk in the bathroom while peeing? During my undergraduate days there was a professor who, whenever she saw a student in the bathroom, would have a full on conversation about literature. It's just weird.

"Hey, I'm going to wait for you outside, okay?" I said while rubbing my hands on a towel, crumpling it up and throwing it away. There was no response, "Okay?"

"Kate. My water just broke."

"What the hell did you say?"

"My water just broke." Yuri flushed the toilet, letting out a cry of pain as I heard her fall to the floor. Ew, I didn't want to do this. I got down on the floor and crawled under the locked stall. Yuri was on the wall, breathing in and out. At least she had prepared herself for this moment. I grabbed her and lifted her up, unlocking the door and dragging her out. So much for escaping the insanity once getting out of Tokyo.

"Kate, Yuri, you aren't going to believe this. We have a flat tire and…what the hell is going on?" Yuuka grumbled at first and then said in suprise as she knelt down by Hotaru's Hyundai.

"Oh Yuuka, we have a bigger problem than that right now." I looked around. I could feel Yuri's body shaking.

"What's going on?" Hotaru and Kurt yelled at the same time, the both of them booking it from the door of the store and running towards us.

"Oh the usual. A Hyundai with a flat tire and a pregnant woman about ready to pop. Just another day in the big ole city." I said. The sarcasm was dripping through my teeth. Why did I ever think that I could ever have a vacation, have the ability to relax and get away?

"Hurry, get her in the truck. There's a hospital a few miles up the road." Kurt said with initiative in his voice as he ran towards his truck. Hotaru came and helped me hold up Yuri as we helped her to the pick-up and lifted her into the truck. Hotaru squished in next to her.

"Kate. I want her to come with me!" Yuri yelled out the open window.

"Yuri, there's nowhere for her to sit."

"You don't have any decision making power. She is coming with us, end of story. Kate, it's a pick-up truck, isn't it? Get in the back. Hurry it up." Yuri demanded. Hotaru looked at me and shrugged, so I hopped in the backseat. Yeah, really, so much for my vacation.

We drove off down the road, the only noise was Yuri's intermittent painful gasps and Hotaru's soft encouraging words. Not to complain, especially since there was someone in the car about to push a bowling ball through her baby hole, but riding on the highway in the back of a pick-up is very uncomfortable. Sitting in the back with luggage flying around me and smacking me in the hip was not pleasant.

"Are we almost there yet?" I screamed into the pick-up.

"If we were going any slower we might be competition with a turtle. Kutano, if you don't drive faster I'm going to push you out of the car and drive my own damn self to the hospital." Yuri snarled in between breaths. I stifled a laugh as I heard the car accelerate a little bit faster. A few exits up the road and we exited, getting stuck at a red light.

"Hotaru, make it turn green." Yuri said through her teeth before letting out a howl of pain. For someone so sweet normally, Yuri was a mean pregnant lady, "make it turn green, now!" The light turned green. Someone up there must not want Hotaru to die a premature death.

Everything went by in a blur as we parked and got Yuri into the clinic. Yuri was screaming, Hotaru was panicking, and Kurt was asking the nurses for help. Me…I felt like laughing my ass off in pure unadulterated sadism.

"Only two of you can come in." A nurse said to us as she helped Yuri into a wheelchair and directed her to start breathing. I hung back so that the two family members could go in.

"I want all of them! I want Kate to come too. I want another woman in there with me, especially with all of these stupid men!" Yuri looked at me, and I looked at Kurt who looked at the nurse.

"Alright, fine. It wouldn't be the first time it's happened," the nurse grumbled to herself and we all followed her into the delivery room.

IIIII

"Hatsumi is a beautiful name for a girl. It means 'the beginning of beauty.' I think that that is exactly what their life will be like now."

"Wow, Kate, I never knew you could be so sentimental." Kurt said sarcastically as we drove toward the pension in Karuizawa where we would be staying.

"I'm not so callous and cantankerous as to not enjoy the beauty and miracle of birth." Kurt looked at me with skepticism, "I just don't really want to push another human being out of my vagina."

"You don't want kids?" Kurt asked as we parked. I got out of the car and grabbed my bags while Kurt grabbed his.

"I've never met anyone that I would want to have kids with. I've never been one to fantasize about having a baby, but I am not opposed to the idea under the right circumstances. Wow." I looked up at the most beautiful white building with blue roofing. There were fountains and flowers. It looked gorgeous. This place far surpassed a normal bed and breakfast, "Are you sure that we can afford this place?"

"You can't, but I can. Come on, let's go." My mouth was still hanging open as we walked to the doors of the Pension. This was almost like something out of a stupid romantic comedy, except for this was anything but stupid.

"Mr. Hisugawa, I am so glad that you finally made it. I knew that asking Ranka to tell his associates about this place would be good for business, and here you are. My first customers of the summer! I am so delighted that you both could come and visit us here. My name is Misuzu and this is my beautiful pension. If you need anything then don't hesitate to ask me or my lovely working girl for the summer. Speaking of my working girl, where is she? I'll get her to show you both up to your room." It said, taking my attention off of the glowing chandelier and beautiful foyer. I say it because Misuzu was dressed as a woman but looked more like a man. The way that it twirled around as it spoke and barely took a breath in between its monologue was very feminine, but I wouldn't speak to soon, especially since it was clear that it was one of Ranka's friends. I could be wrong, but I think Misuzu is another fluttering tranny.

"Kate-sensei, Hisugawa-sensei, what are you two doing here?" Haruhi looked so cute in her little white and yellow apron! Her voice addressed us and my heart nearly melted at seeing her. I know I had said that I needed a break from Ouran, but seeing Haruhi made me miss it. Scratch that, it made me miss her.

"Haruhi, it's so nice to see you. Are you working here for the summer?" Kurt asked before I could say anything. I was too dumbfounded at having found such a wonderful person so far from Tokyo. She looked so cute in girls' clothing; I had almost forgotten what she looked like in it.

"Yeah. It gives me a break, and my father thinks that it is a good way to keep tract of me while he is at work. Misuzu-san is one of his former colleagues. Here, let me get some of those bags." Haruhi grabbed a bag from Kurt and one from me as she showed us up the stairs and to a bedroom at the end of the hallway, "Can I help you guys unpack?"

"Sure. I actually am going to go find Misuzu to take care of the payment for the room and to get a map of the city. I'll leave you girls to do the dirty work." Kurt ruffled Haruhi's hair and gave me a quick peck on the cheek before exiting the room. I heard Haruhi stifle a giggle as she opened my bag and began hanging up my clothes.

"How's everything going Haruhi? I know that you finally made top of the class after taking the make-up exam. I'm sorry for that. I should have made it clearer that you needed to write more than one original sentence for that sentence combining section."

"Sensei, you made it as clear as you could. I meant to come back to it after I finished the rest of the test, but I forgot. It's over now." Haruhi, as cute as she was, had probably one of the driest and most monotone voices I had heard. She had emotion, yes, but it was almost as if she was too lazy to get her voice past certain decibels. It also could be the fact that almost everything she said was so blunt it was sharp (contradiction, no?).

"How are you enjoying it here so far, Haruhi?" Since she was working on my bag, I decided that I would begin unpacking Kurt's things. I hung my head. Everything was just shoved into the bag; nothing was folded. Typical.

"It's great. It's so peaceful up here, and it is really nice not to have to think about school. Besides, there is no Host club to invade my summer or my sanity."

"I hear you on that. What is their problem anyways?" I smiled when Haruhi smiled. She was so innocent when she smiled and so adorable. In more ways than one she reminded me of Lily. So brave, so strong, so completely understanding of other people's lunacy. Such a beautiful young woman.

"They, especially Tamaki-sempai and Kyoya-sempai, don't know how to stifle their own curiosity. I know that they do it because they are good people, but sometimes they can be a bit too much. As much as they get on my nerves, I can't help but enjoy being around them. It is almost a Catch 22."

"You're the victim, but have no control over your victimization because of your debt. I get you." I chuckled. It was almost a Catch 22, but I think on some level Haruhi played the victim rather than being forced to be the victim. On some level she just enjoyed being around those guys. As horrible and psychotically disturbed they may seem at times, being around a bunch of gorgeous guys who were so concerned about you that they invaded your privacy was a heaven-sent.

"Uh, sensei, what is this?" Haruhi asked me, and I turned around from where I was throwing a pair of Kurt's jeans in a drawer. I gulped. She was holding up the thing that the twins gave to me through Ruuya and Yuuka. I blanched and then blushed so hot that I felt as if my head was going to explode.

"Kate, Haruhi, I was wondering if you both wanted to go to see Kabuki in town tonight? It's called _Shinjūten no Amijima_ and is supposed to be similar to _Romeo and Juliet_." Kurt said as he entered the room. I grabbed the garment from Haruhi's hands and rolled it up behind my back.

"That sounds like fun, right Haruhi?" I tried to force the color from my cheeks as I moved slowly to the bathroom and tossed the garment through the open door, ignoring the confused look I was getting from Kutano.

"Sure. Let me go ask Misuzu if I can have the night off." Haruhi walked out of the room and Kurt shut the door behind her, going to the bed and putting the rest of the stuff away. I slunk to the bathroom door and closed it, then walked to help him finish unpacking.

"So, if we are going to see Kabuki tonight, what are we going to do till then?" I asked, setting a pair of flip-flops on the floor next to the bed. Without warning I felt his arms slowly come around my waist and lips touch the back of my neck.

"I know something we can do." He said into my ear. Fuck, what was it about men that can make them sound so annoying one minute and so sultry the next. It was so unfair.

"If we are going out tonight you better not give me a hickey." I tried to pull his hands off of me, but he was way too strong. Either that or I simply wasn't trying hard enough. Both. Both are valid answers.

"What is that line in that musical you are rehearsing with the Choir club? Oh yeah, 'A hickey from Kenichie's like a Hallmark Card.'" Kurt was a charmer that could keep up with my nerd. I could say that without any hesitation at all. This time there wasn't much incentive to resist temptation, but there was something I wanted to do first. I turned around and mouthed for him to hold on as I ran to the bathroom and shut the door behind me, grabbing the gift off of the floor and put it on.

A black corset with clasps on the front and a small mini-skirt connected to it was quite stunning, however, fifteen year old boys should not, I repeat not, send this kind of thing with their female teacher on vacation. Those twins were so devious. Horribly devious. I would have to thank them later. I opened the door of the bathroom and walked out. By Kurt's expression I knew that I was smoking hot. I knew this before, of course, for I am a sex goddess. Ha, how's that for self confidence. So…awkward.

"'Sweet mystery of life at last I have found you!'" I sung. Yes, this wasn't _Young Frankenstein_, but I felt that my nerdiness was necessary in order to break up the awkwardness of this moment.

"You're Americana cult classic references turn me on." Kurt smiled his boyishly excited smile. Hell, he better be fucking excited.

"You sure it's not this get-up and the fact that we're going to be riding dirty?" Yes, I just made a reference to one of the worst rap songs ever made.

"I'm sure that has something to do with it. And the fact that you are so white and nerdy." He kissed me, and I fought back a laugh. He was not only keeping up with my nerdy American references, but he was also invoking the genius of Weird Al. This was a match made in heaven.

"Touché Hisugawa, Touché."

IIIII

Who the hell was hammering outside? I come on vacation so that I can sleep in, stay up late, and relax. Someone was going to die. I groaned into my pillow before opening my eyes. Damn sunlight. Really, sometimes I did feel as if its rays were going to blind me while turning me to dust.

"Kate, what's wrong? Why are you making so much noise?" Kurt grumbled, starting to move around under the covers. This was only our third day in Karuizawa, and it was wonderfully peaceful and amazing up until this point.

"Someone's banging around outside, it's not me." I grumbled back at him as I walked to the window and opened it, letting in more sunlight (death, it was death; I swear) and looking down below me, "No! Hell no! Why does God hate me?" I cried, sinking down so that I was sitting on the floor, my hands still holding onto the windowsill for dear life.

"Kate, what's going on?" Kurt sat up in bed, stood up, and walked over to the window and looked outside, "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" He began laughing uncontrollably, doubling over in laughter so that his entire upper half was hanging outside of the window.

"Good Morning, Mr. Hisugawa." Kyoya Ootori's voice traveled up two stories and right to my spine, making me shiver. Fuck my life.

"Hisu-san! Is Ame-san with you?" Honey Haninozuka's sweet voice echoed up to me as well, which meant that Mori Morinozuka's silent voice was lurking somewhere closeby. I grabbed the windowsill and tried to stand up.

"Hisugawa-sempai! Is Kate-sempai up there with you?" Two voices simultaneously hit my ears. I felt a strong arm grab my waist and pull me up the rest of the way. Turning towards Kurt I glared at him and stuck out my tongue before looking down and seeing the sinister portrait of two fox twins looking at me.

I let out a panicked "meh."

"Ame-sempai, you look so radiant in the morning light. It looks like Karuizawa agrees with you." Tamaki Suoh said creamily as he stood up from a spot by the fence, lifting his hand in the air and stepping forward with one leg for effect.

All of them were down there. Hikaru and Kaoru were chilling off a watermelon; Kyoya was sitting at a table typing on his laptop, his black notebook opened next to it; Mori was chopping firewood (I don't know why since it was summer); Honey was sitting at a chair eating a piece of cake, and Tamaki was still posing, his blond hair glittering in the sunlight.

"Looks like vacation just got more interesting. Don't you think so, Kathrin?" Kurt lilted his voice as he whispered those words slowly into my ear. I caught the twins give me a thumbs-up and heard Honey giggle from the ground floor. I knew that they probably followed Haruhi here. It was sweet that she mattered so much to them. However, it was not sweet that wherever they all happened to be, including Haruhi, I was there too, sharing in her Host club hell.

"Yeah," I gulped, leaning my head on Kurt's shoulder, "Interesting is one of _many_ ways I could describe it."


	18. A Nightmare With the Twins

A Night(mare) With the Twins

_Thump. Thump. Thump._

The slow procession of my feet going downstairs from our room echoed the slow and barely alive beat of my heart. I felt like I was eroding away. Kurt was holding my hand, not holding back his laughter one bit. To him, my pain was intoxicating. Perhaps I was being a little bit overdramatic, but my mood clearly mirrored that of one other person here: Haruhi. To be honest, and to rationalize my own mildly iconic depression, I felt _really_ bad for Haruhi. She never got a break from these guys and despite her protestations of enjoying their company; I knew that they got to be a little bit too much.

"How are you enjoying your stay in Karuizawa, Miss Amendier?" Kyoya's silky yet sinister voice greeted my ear as I sat down at the table with him out on the deck. I glanced wearily at the Shadow King, flopping my forehead down on the table and taking in a huge breath, hearing him open his black notebook and begin scratching on the paper with a pen.

"So, Kyoya, what's going on?" Kurt asked. I heard him pull out a chair and sit next to me, tapping me rather forcefully on the back. I let out the huge breath I had let in. I guess suffocation wouldn't be the preferred mode of coping today.

"Currently, I'm waiting until the winner of the refresher contest is decided, then I will head back to the cottage. Right now it looks as if Mori-sempai is heading the totals; however, Honey-sempai's brand of cute doesn't necessarily match with Misuzu's idea of refreshing, so Mori-sempai will inevitably drop out. The winners of the contest will most likely be Hikaru and Kaoru, unless, well, unless the game becomes more interesting."

"Interesting. Is that all that anyone around here knows to use to describe this situation?" Kurt had used it last night, and now Kyoya was using it. I looked up, noticing that the two of them were watching me, their eyes/glasses were glinting darkly in the sunlight. This was beyond…_beyond _interesting. This was a disaster.

"Amendier. You look thirsty." Mori's gruff voice forced me to stop leaning on the table as I looked up. Pause. Perhaps the fact the fact that I no longer worked at Ouran was a good thing because Mori covered in sweat is a quite beautiful specimen of masculinity. For clarification, I am not perving, I am just admiring the beauty of God's creation. Kutano Hisugawa was way sexier than this high school student who still had a few years of maturing to go. Just thought I would point it out.

"Thanks Mori. I appreciate it." I took the chilled bottle of water that the jolly green giant (yeah, I am probably going to forever refer to him as that in my mind) handed me, unscrewing the top and taking a sip.

"How kind of you Mori-kun! Three refresher points!" Misuzu appeared behind me, grabbing my shoulders and beginning to sway me from side to side, spilling the cold water all over my white t-shirt. Yes, imagine the implications of this action, especially when surrounded by a bunch of guys.

"Kate-sempai, here's a towel to dry off with." Hikaru ran at the table from the grass.

"And here is a sweater, sempai." Kaoru ran from behind me and handed me one of the sweatshirts that I had left in our room.

"How wonderful! Just wonderful! Five refresher points to each of you! That's ten total!" Misuzu let go of my shoulders to do a pose and then flitted back off into the foyer.

"What all just happened?" I was stunned shitless. This was service beyond normal Host club stuff; this was actually _real_ work, and they were being nice about it. Even the two little devils.

"The refresher points awarded by Misuzu add up until one of the Host club members are awarded the last available room in the pension. Coincidently, I believe that the room is a single person room located right next to the master suite on the second floor. The suite that both yourself and Mr. Hisugawa are residing in for the duration of your vacation." Kyoya knew this all along.

"Kyoya-sempai, how long do you think this contest is going to go on? Everyone here is making it harder on me to do my work, even though they are supposed to be helping around the pension. I'm pretty sure that Tamaki-sempai ruined the fence. Misuzu wanted me to fix it, but I have too much to do to fix everyone else's messes." Haruhi seemed to be wilting in front of my very eyes. She was way far worse off than I was at the moment. I felt like this was a piece of hell, but compared to Haruhi it was like the second circle verses the seventh.

"Here, I think that I can be of some assistance. Show me where the fence it." Kurt stood up, his gallantry shining as Haruhi said a quick 'thank you'. I'd give him one thousand refresher points, but that could be me being biased.

"That idiot. It took him this long to figure out my hint?" Kyoya whispered to himself, though I was close enough to make out what he had said. I was about to ask what he was talking about when I heard some soft piano notes floating through the air. Tamaki. I smiled despite myself, remembering the night that I heard him play the piano, the night I had lifted my voice in memory of my sweet Lily, "Moron."

I looked up, watching Kyoya close the black notebook that he had been writing in and prop his head on his hands. His new position helped the shade cover his face, and for probably one of the first times I could see behind his glasses. His eyes were closed and his mouth was turned upward in a soft smile.

"So this is it, Kyoya. This is the end of the game." I watched him open his eyes. His eyes were a dark shade of purple, almost looking as if they were a dark gray like Kurt's. It was the first time I had actually seen his eyes. So it seems that Tamaki could even charm Satan himself with his classical music prowess. It was good to see Kyoya relax himself for a bit. As much as I couldn't understand how he could be so underhanded and self-servicing, I would say that he did have a heart hidden deep (deep, deep, deep) inside of him.

"Kaoru! Kaoru are you okay!" I heard Hikaru yell as he ran to where Kaoru was leaning over Haruhi, a shattered window and frame lying on the deck. Seriously, when they use one another's names when they are talking, it makes it infinitely easier to tell them apart.

"I thought that it would be too soon to calculate a win." Kyoya shifted his glasses up his nose, opening his notebook and writing down a note before standing up and walking inside.

"Bravo! Bravo! One hundred points for refreshing brotherly love! A perfect score! The winners are the Hitachiin brothers!" I shook my head and moved inside once I heard the shrill of Misuzu's voice, simultaneously hearing the clunk of Tamaki's hands on the piano.

I watched the two twins produce mirrored piece signs, Misuzu circling around them in excitement and Haruhi's face fall a little bit.

No. No, no, no, no. That meant that the twins were going to be in the next room for an entire night, maybe even the entire break.

"So begins the long, dark night of my soul." Tamaki whimpered, hanging his head and collapsing onto the piano bench. I wobbled over to him and sat down next to him, grabbing his hand in mine. The two of us clutched onto one another, sobbing uncontrollably, "Daddy does not approve!"

"Those damn foxes. They are going to eat me alive!"

IIIII

"Come on Kate, it's past midnight. No one is going to be around. Hurry up and put this on, or do I have to do it for you?" Kurt held out my swimsuit, walking towards me and nearly backing me into the corner.

"Do we really have to do this? Especially with those damn twins here?" Once the twins had declared victory they decided that it would be amusing to chase Tamaki and I around the house with a water hose. Then, at dinner, they thought that it would be so freaking hilarious to pull a stupid and incredibly old school prank on me by setting a tack on my chair. As if that wasn't enough, once Kurt and I walked into our bedroom the twins preceded to aerial attack us with pillows. Kurt was amused; I was not. Now he wanted to try and force me to get over my fear of swimming. Hell to the no.

"Just get into the swimsuit or I swear I will drag you down there and throw you in."

"Not funny." It really wasn't. I knew he would never do that to me, considering I had a very valid reason for being afraid of larger bodies of water, but the threat was still rather intimidating, "Fine. I'll do it because you said so. Besides, you just want to see me in a bathing suit."

"You forget that I've seen you without any type of suit on at all."

"Pervert." I stuck out my tongue and changed while he changed into his swim trunks, "I thought I specifically ordered a Speedo."

"And I thought I told you that that was never going to happen; however, I did manage to procure this." Kurt reached down into the bag that our towels were in and pulled out a bottle containing a pale green liquid.

"Is that a margarita in a bottle?" I galloped up to him and grabbed the glass from his hand. Sure enough it was exactly that, a margarita in bottle. I laughed. Really?

"Hey, don't laugh. It took me a while to find something other than premium sake or a dinner wine. Tequila isn't very popular here." He grabbed the bottle and wrenched it out of my grasp. I let out a small pout, "You are only getting it _after_ we try swimming. Call it an incentive."

Damn, I was rubbing off on him, "What happened to the nice, sweet, and sensitive Kutano Hisugawa?"

"I'm nice because I hunted down alcohol for you. I'm sweet because, despite my own perverse pleasure at watching the twins make you into a punching back, I am still on your side. And I am sensitive because I am doing all of these things out of my deep love for you, Kathrin." He replied with a certain level of snarkiness to his voice as he walked past me, grabbing my hand and dragging me out the door, down the stairs, and to the pool in the backyard.

From the front, Pension Misuzu didn't look like it was that large, but once you went exploring you realized that it had pretty much everything that a state of the art hotel had, just way more congenial and home feeling. As Kurt put our stuff down on the bench I could hear the pool filter churning the water in an out, the ghostly lights under the water illuminating the depth of the pool.

"Uh, I really don't think that I can do this." Without realizing it I had back away from the pool as far as I could go, the back of my legs hitting the pool chair. Timber! "Ouch, my ass." I landed right on my posterior, the chair falling to the ground on top of me.

"Kate, come on. You can do this." Kurt flashed me a smile as he helped me up and gathered me into his arms. I looked into his deep gray eyes, the moonlight and stars creating their own constellations in them. I gulped. I was usually one of those people who could do what they set their minds to, except for keeping a job, apparently. Kurt moved so that he was standing behind me, holding both of my hands in his, walking towards the shallow end with the stairs. He took a step down into the water with his left leg, then he unlocked his hand from mine and patted the top of my same leg, "You can do it."

I gulped and forced my foot into the water, closing my eyes. I could feel my entire body begin to shake and my heartbeat raise once the cold wetness ran up to my ankle. Without waiting for me to say to continue Kurt put his other foot in, forcing me to do the same. I closed my eyes tighter, trying to push of the memories of my heart going crazy while my lungs throbbed in pain.

"Kurt." I could feel my nails digging into flesh. This was petrifying, but I could feel Kutano's hot breath on my ear as he softly encouraged me with an 'I love you.' I panicked, surprising myself when the panic came from the fact that he said he loved (in English I might add) me verses the fact that the water was sloshing around my knees. How could he love me, really? Love was way too emotional for me. Could I say that I loved him? Yes, I could, but that was terrifying. Emotion was terrifying. At any rate, love couldn't be associated with water. Death was associated with water. Hate was associated with water. There was no rebirth, there was no joy. There couldn't be.

"I love you." There it was again, those three little words. The English language was inept when it came to representing love. In Greek there was eros, philia, agape, storge. In Japanese (mind you most Japanese adults will have only said these words a handful of times) was ai, aisuru, aishite imasu, aishiteru. In Spanish, amar, encantar, querer, gustar mucho, and those are just the infinitive verb forms. In German there was liebe. In French there was amour, Je t'aime, Je t'adore. In English it was just love. I love my little Mushi the same way I love a taco, the same way I love Kurt. But somehow, hearing him say it in my own language, whispering it softly into my ear, somehow it meant so much more than the love for a kitten or a taco.

"I love you too." I couldn't help but cry as I grabbed for him, still keeping my eyes closed and finding his lips with mine. Kurt leaned his forehead against mine, and so I opened my eyes.

"Look, Kate, you did it." Of course I did, I actually let some real emotion flow out of me instead of keeping it balled inside, "Kate, you aren't even paying attention are you."

"What the hell!" I backed up suddenly. Everything except my neck was wet. I was in the water! Kurt swam over to where I had backed up towards. I could feel the hair of my arms stand on end because of the coolness of the water. It felt so soft on my skin, made me feel as If I could do anything. My muscles twitched, asking me for movement, so I obeyed, stroking the water and kicking with my feet, "Fuck me. I'm swimming."

"Shhhh. Language." I shrugged my sorry at Kurt, hoping that my loud exclamation hadn't woken up anyone.

"Kate-sempai, Kutano-sempai!" Two voices yelled, breaching the silence of the night as Hikaru and Kaoru came running towards the deeper end of the pool, both of them running onto the two diving boards and shooting themselves up in the air, twirling around and then diving into the water in perfect synchronization.

"You two should try out for the Olympics in synchronized diving. That was amazingly symmetrical." Kurt applauded as the two twins came up for air, swimming towards us. I backed up behind Kurt. They were not going to ruin this night. I had finally made two very large personal achievements, and I would not allow them to petrify me into regressing back to my former state. Wow, after only a few moments of my new life I was completely fine with the fact that we were swimming. I guess I had made more progress in letting go of the past than I thought I had.

"Kate-sempai, I see that you are swimming." Hikaru or Kaoru said (damn water, messes up the parts in their hair), though I think it was Hikaru because of the deeper voice. Maybe. Kind of. Sort of. Damn it. Whoever it was, decided to swim behind me, placing his arm on my right shoulder.

"I think that since the four of us are up we should play a game." Kaoru, I think, said as he mirrored Hikaru's gesture, leaning his arm on my left shoulder.

"Hikaru, Kaoru, shouldn't you be in bed by now?" Haruhi's voice saved me, as the twins swam to the edge of the pool where Haruhi was now. Such a sweet girl, she had brought out a few fresh towels for Kurt and me without us even asking. Clearly she didn't see that we had brought out own towels, but it was the thought that mattered.

"I think the question is why aren't _you_ in bed?" The two twins said, crossing their arms on the edge of the pool, holding themselves up.

"I usually finish cleaning up the kitchen and foyer by this time of night, then I usually come out here for a swim. Usually I don't have to worry about guests though, so I think I am going to go to bed." Haruhi said drably, glaring at Hikaru and Kaoru when she was talking about "guests" to worry about. Well done Haruhi. She was in classes with them all day during school, so of course she had them pinned down. I did notice, however, that she was dressed in a tankini top and men's swim bottoms. Androgyny really suited her well.

"Haruhi, would you grab me a drink from my bag. I think there is a water bottle in there somewhere." Kurt swam over to where he had left our bag, while Haruhi walked over there and searched around for the bag. Haruhi was such a sweet person, so was Kurt, really, unlike the twins who had turned away from the edge of the pool, smirking to one another. See, they had something planned. Those two doppelgangers, you always had to watch out for them.

_SPLASH_

"Hisugawa-sensei!" Haruhi surfaced just after the full bottle of water did. Kurt grabbed the bottle, unscrewed the top, and took a sip.

"Water is so refreshing, wouldn't you agree, Hikaru? Kaoru?" Kurt smirked slyly as he raised the bottle towards the twins who both gave him a thumbs-up.

"Damn boys." Haruhi growled, swimming over to me, "Have they been doing this all night to you, Kate-sensei."

"No. Kurt's actually been pretty sweet. It just seems as if the twins breed misfortune wherever they go. They think on the wavelength of tricksters and suddenly everyone begins to act like that."

"True, but Hikaru and Kaoru have it perfected to a fault." Haruhi rolled her eyes, and the two of us sat back on the other side of the pool as we watched Hikaru jump up to distract Kurt from the fact that Kaoru was underneath the water about to make a pull at Kurt's legs. I could warn him, but he didn't really deserve it, so Haruhi and I watched as Kurt was pulled under the water.

"Care to place bets on anyone? I'll by you whatever you want in town if you win." I asked Haruhi. Kurt had wiggled out of Kaoru's grasp and had him by the waist, trying to fend of Hikaru who was trying to free his brother from the Hisugawa's grasp.

"I think that Hisugawa-sensei is going to. While Hikaru and Kaoru have the advantage of teamwork, I'm not entirely sure that they can beat someone as strong as Hisugawa-sensei." Hikaru had freed Kaoru, only to be captured himself, the two of them dunked into the water and held down by their heads.

"What do you mean 'as strong as Hisugawa-sensei?'" Hikaru and Kaoru had wrapped each of their legs around Kurt's middle and righted themselves, holding Kutano underneath the water with their body weight. It almost looked as if they were surfing on a Kurt shaped surfboard.

"Kyoya-sempai told me that from elementary school through high-school he had studied martial arts with the Morinozuka and Haninozuka families. That that is one of the reasons was able to teach at Ouran academy, because he knows Honey-sempai and Mori-sempai' families so well. Apparently he is the one who got Honey-sempai so interested in mathematics and technology. Of course that is according to what Kyoya-sempai said." So Kurt was a freaking ninja, and I had no idea about it. Come to think of it I had actually never seen him interact with either Honey or Mori very often, but it was also true that there was a lot I didn't know about all of these psychotic people associated with Ouran.

"Uncle, uncle, uncle!" Each of the twins gasped. Kurt had them both around the waist, holding them apart as they struggled against him. It was very satisfying to see someone get the better of the twins. Very, very satisfying. Kurt let them go and swam over to me, grabbing me around the waist and kissing me on the cheek.

"We owe Haruhi dinner whenever she can get a night off of work. And how come you didn't tell me that you were a ninja." I poked him in the chest.

"I'm not. The twins are just easy to beat. Hotaru forced me to enter a dojo with him when we were little and so we learned. And I guess getting dinner for Haruhi is the least thing that I could do since I'm the reason she is in here right now rather than in bed." Kurt reached forward and ruffled Haruhi's hair. She just looked up at him, her face completely expressionless.

"Somewhere with fancy tuna?" Haruhi asked softly. The twins suddenly shot up through the water next to her, both of them hugging her tightly, making her the filling in another twin sandwich.

"Must be an inside joke," I shrugged and decided that I would try and swim underwater. Really it was just an excuse to get away from any atomic Haruhi detonated bomb that might go off at that side of the pool. I took in a deep breath and sunk underneath the water, taking off towards the far end. In the beginning I couldn't help but remember the feeling of not being able to breath, but slowly I grew into the feeling. I was enjoying it. I remember loving to swim with Lily, but then after everything happened I was petrified of it. Now, now it felt night.

"Hey," I surfaced, taking in a breath of fresh air before continuing, "When I was little we used to play a game called colors. Do you guys want to play?"

"Yay. Yay. Play. Play!" The twins sung together, awkwardly dancing in the water. I saw Haruhi chuckle as she watched the twins reaction. I took in a deep breath of the Karuizawa air around me, feeling the night wind brush against my wet hair and face. Despite the torture I went through today, this was incredibly fun.

IIIII

A/N – Hello all. This is kind of a short chapter, but I couldn't think of anything else to add to it, so I decided it was good just the way it is. To answer the questions of quite a few people, I am going to deviate from the Manga and the Anime a little bit. I have been using the Anime as more of a timetable for my story rather than the Manga, but I am referring back to the Manga for specifics, if that makes sense. I really appreciate all of the reviews I have gotten, especially from da Furr and KageNoNeko who have reviewed every chapter so far as well as azaleacroncs. It would be awesome if those of you who I know are reading this and enjoy it would review, because that is how I gauge what to do next and what not to do next. I appreciate feedback, even if it is criticism. Anyways, I hope everyone is having a great summer!


	19. What Happened to My Relaxing Vacation

Disclaimer: I do not own Ouran the manga or anime. This probably should be said at the beginning of every chapter, but since I am using some actual quotes from the manga and anime, I figured it would be go to say it ahead of time.

A/N - Speaking of giving credit where credit is due, the song _Boku Wa Kuma (I'm a bear)_ is by Hikaru Utada. You can find the English lyrics online but to clear up one thing before we get into the story "Makura-san" means "Mr. Pillow." If you know that, I think it will make that section a bit more amusing. This chapter is a little bit choppy because it is taking the span of two full days, but I tried to make it as flowing as possible.

And as always, review, review review! Oh, and enjoy!

IIIII

What Happened to My Relaxing Vacation?

"I can't sleep if you are staring at me" Kurt's voice suddenly broke the silence of the morning, though his body remained in the same position as it had been in for the past twenty minutes as I leaned on my elbow, looking at him. If he was allowed to be a super stalker like he was the night we met, I was allowed to stare at him while he slept.

"How can you know if I am staring at you if you are asleep?" I reached forward and brushed a stray piece of hair from his face, getting him to open his eyes and look at me.

"That is why I said that I 'cannot' sleep, meaning that I am awake. Are you sure you are a competent linguist?"

"Touché, Hisugawa. Touché." I leaned forward and pecked him on the lips before rolling out of bed dramatically and walking over to the closet, pulling out a pair of jeans and one of my favorite shirts. It was a three quarter sleeved shirt with black sleeves, white everything else, and in bright red lettering it said "Though she be but little, she is fierce." A quote from Shakespeare's _A Midsummer Nights' Dream_. I loved the fact that there was recognition of the fact that those who are 5'1" can still be feared. Mwahahaha, "Speaking of being completely owned, I have something that I want to play for you."

"Oh yeah, what is that?" Kurt got out of bed and moved to where I was standing, grabbing his own clothes out of the closet, and getting dressed. I walked over to my iHome (yes, I do bring this thing practically everywhere I go), and searched around on my iPod to find the most perfect wonder of life that I had found in Japanese pop music.

_Boku wa kuma, kuma, kuma, kuma_

_Kuruma janaiyo kuma kuma kuma_

Translation: I am a bear, bear, bear, bear.

I gave him a sickeningly large grin, craning my neck forward and showing as many of my teeth as possible. He ignored me for a little bit, going back to the bed and folding his covers back to their rightful place.

_Boku wa kuma kuma kuma kuma_

_Kenka wa yadayo kuma kuma kuma_

_RAIBARU wa ebi-furai dayo_

_Zense wa kitto chokoreeto_

_Boku wa kuma kuma kuma kuma_

"I am never telling you any more personal embarrassing moments for the rest of my life." Kurt said calmly, walking over to me and poking me in the stomach as he moved to my side of the bed and corrected the covers. I went up behind him and grabbed him around the torso, leaning my head on his back.

"I'm a bear. Rawr!" I just couldn't resist. I could have taken the moment to say something sweet, but why waste a perfectly good opportunity. Without warning I was smacked upside the head with a flying pillow. Kurt leapt onto the bed and faced me, poised for attack.

_Bonjour! Je m' appelle kuma_

_Comment ca va_

"Watch out, Kate. I'm a bear. Rawr!" He swung at me again. If I wasn't stunned enough by the first blow to the back of the head, I was sure surprised at another hard blow to my face.

_Boku wa kuma kuma kuma kuma_

"Rat bastard!" I growled, grabbing another pillow and hopping onto the bed, smacking him with my own fluffy weapon.

_Fuyu wa nemuiyo kuma kuma kuma_

_Yoru wa oyasumi makura-san_

_Asa wa ohayou makura-san_

"Language," Kurt aimed his pillow at my side, the smack nearly knocking me off of the bed. Dude, how the hell can someone make a pillow hit so strongly! Not fair! Oh, that was right, Haruhi told me he had some martial arts experience. Though I may be but small, I am fierce…but not when it comes to trying to beat down my Japanese ninja lover.

Aw Hell, no one pillow fights me and gets away with it. I smacked him in the face as hard as I could with my pillow, realizing that he probably didn't feel it at all.

"Kate-sensei, Hisugawa-sen…" Kurt and I paused amidst our fighting. I was poised on the bed, ready to pounce down on Kurt who was holding his ground on the floor. This moment was one of those serendipitous moments in life where everything just kind of pauses for a moment. Haruhi was standing in the door in her adorable apron while Kurt and I were being total adults (cough, cough). I watched her eyes fall into the 'I can't believe I am seeing this' look before she said dryly, "Breakfast is ready. Come get it when you are ready," shutting the door behind her.

"Kurt dropped the pillow, shrugging, turning of the iPod and beginning to walk out the door."

"I'm a bear!" I screamed, suddenly flipping into English as I threw my pillow at the back of Kurt's head, jumping down from the bed, and running out of the door, slamming it closed on my way back. I ran to the edge of the banister before stopping, straightening myself, and walking calmly down the stairs.

"Good morning, Kathrin-san! I hope that you are having such a wonderful time at my little pension. You and those Hitachiin brothers seemed like you were having so much fun yesterday. I do hope that those Host club boys come back today! I had so many more customers taking advantage of the refreshing beauty of them!" Misuzu greeted me as I sat down at an empty table, talking incredibly fast without breathing again. It was a miracle that he never keeled over from asphyxiation.

"Bonjour! Comment ca va?" Tamaki greeted me as he set down a plate of food, Kurt joining me eventually, glaring at me as he grabbed a piece of bread.

"Bon! How are you doing today, Tamaki?" I switched back to Japanese as to not alienate the third party that had just come to the table, and was continuing to glare at me as he munched his bread. I slid my foot out of my flip flop and reached under the table to rub his leg with it. He looked at me and grinned despite how much I knew he didn't want to, "Wait, were you saying something?" Tamaki looked down at me with a pout before tearing off into the corner, gloom hanging over him like a bit of undigested beef. I made an_ A Christmas Carol_ joke in my head. I am a nerd! Nerdtastic. Truly I didn't even realize that Tamaki was still talking, I had gotten so sidetracked trying to make Kurt smile.

"Tamaki-sempai, please don't do this now. We have guests." Haruhi sighed, placing down two glasses of orange juice on the table and walking away, not even really putting much effort at getting him off of the floor and out of his slump.

"Tamaki, dear! Come let me show you the correct way to plate the finest Karuizawa meats available!" Misuzu's voice called from where the kitchen had to have been, and to my surprise Tamaki leapt up and followed the call. I shrugged, grabbing a piece of bread for myself and biting into it.

"Kaoru, I said I was sorry. I didn't mean to kick you out of the bed!" Hikaru (I know cause he said Kaoru, see, I can play this game) pleaded with his brother as he followed him down the stairs. Kaoru had his hands on his hips, his whole demeanor radiating with frustration. Wow, they actually did get upset with one another, who would have thought? Kurt and I watched the two twins sit down at a table across the room from us. Geez, you would have thought that they would have at least said 'hi' to me, especially after all the fun we had last night. What was I, chopped liver?

I grabbed a piece of salmon from the plate and popped it in my mouth, only to choke on it when Kurt surprised me with a boisterous laugh, inciting his reflexes to kick me in the shin.

"Kate, shoot, sorry. I just, you just missed Tamaki swatting Hikaru and Kaoru on the head with a newspaper."

"While anyone smacking the twins with anything, especially if it were a 2x4, would be amazingly hilarious to me, I don't get what perverse pleasure you get out of it." I grabbed a sausage from the plate and pointed it at him, realizing that the gesture was way more phallic than it needed to be in my mind and quickly stuffed the meat in my mouth. Ha, I guess that is quite phallic anyways.

"I taught algebra to the first years, so I had the twins and Haruhi in my class. They were always hovering around either me or Haruhi, so I always thought of them as little flies buzzing around and pestering everyone. Now that I see Tamaki smacking them with a newspaper, it cements the metaphor in my head, making me laugh. I'm sorry I kicked you though."

There was a reason I loved Kurt. Really, a good reason. Sighing I leaned back in the chair, letting my hair hang back. I used to do this in college during my classes if there was someone I knew sitting behind me. I would lean my head back so far that I could see them and talk with them without turning around in my chair. It was effective and surprisingly comfortable. Kurt continued to munch on the food while I witnessed Tamaki harassing the twins for once, but then I saw them get back at him somehow, Tamaki returning to his corner and sulking.

"Arai?" Suddenly the entire atmosphere in the room changes. I righted my head and looked at Kurt who had noticed that a slight chill had entered the room. Scrutinizing the scene I saw both the twins and Tamaki looking at the fruit boy who had just entered the pension. Hikaru, the one with the part off to the right (I made note of it this morning), was stiff as a board.

"Are you seeing what I am seeing, Kate?" Kurt asked me as a yawning Kyoya and Honey walked into the pension from outside, all of them instantly realizing what was going on.

"Haru-chan! Is this a friend from middle school? That is so exciting!" Honey ran up to Haruhi and the boy who must have been Arai before running over to another table that had cake on it. Oh yes, immediate attention diverted because of cake. That's Honey for you.

"Kurt, why are we sitting here like this?" I asked him, glaring at him in boredom. We had been watching the events unfold between Arai, Haruhi, and the rest of the host club for some time now. Scratch that. Kurt had been watching them while I have been counting the tiles on the ceiling, which is quite impossible to do since it is all white marble.

"Damn, did you just hear that? Haruhi completely rejected Arai when they were in middle school, and Haruhi didn't even realize it!" Kurt was getting way too excited by this. I always knew that he liked to butt into other people's business, but I didn't know that he was so much of a gossip that he rivaled most preteen girls. I liked gossip as much as the next girl, but this was just too boring for me. Somebody, please, shoot me now.

"Kurt, I know we just planned on spending the day inside today relaxing, but can we at least do something?" I narrowed my eyes at him when I realized that he was clearly not paying attention to me. Here we go, I found Kutano Hisugawa's fatal flaw: He would have made an excellent photojournalist for _People_ magazine.

"You think that much of my little girl! Don't worry; I'll never forget your gallantry!" Tamaki voice flittered to my ears, so I decided that actually paying attention to what was going on would be a tiny bit less exhausting than trying to get Kurt's attention or count nonexistent tiles. The entire host club had moved to the table with Arai and Haruhi. That is, the entire Host club except for Hikaru and Kaoru. Tamaki even made an effort to call the two of them over.

"Kate, look at that. Kaoru looks like he wants to go join the rest of the guys, but he isn't."

"Thanks for the play by play, but if you can't tell I decided to join your little personal invasion." I was being sarcastic, but I noticed Kaoru's expression. He wanted to go learn about Haruhi, but Hikaru was almost as depressed looking as Tamaki is when he is in your corner. After sitting here for over an hour it was finally getting interesting.

"I can't believe Tono is actually hanging out with that Jerk." Hikaru began to say in a rather harsh tone. This was new to me. He actually seemed to have a genuine emotion other than "I want to play tricks on you, hehehe." I guess if Kaoru had his own personality, Hikaru did too, but the two of them are together almost all the time, you wouldn't even guess that they could be so different.

"Hikaru, Kaoru, get over here! This may be the last time we get to hear what Haruhi was like in middle school." Tamaki yelled over, extending an invitation for the two twins to join them. I really wanted them to go over and all be one happy family, but I had a feeling that that wasn't going to happen.

"Bad move, Tamaki," Kurt sucked in his breath, as if prepared for the blow that was now inevitable.

"Sorry, but I'm not interested. Man, how stupid can you guys get. What's so great about sitting around and telling stories about somebody's past. I don't see the appeal. Besides, doesn't that guy realize that Haruhi doesn't want anything to do with him? She's got plenty of friends, so she doesn't need you around, get it?"

_Slap_

"That's not something for you to decide, Hikaru. I'm not going to let you insult my friends."

"But why? Why should anyone else even matter to you? We're the ones who you're friends with!"

Kurt and I sat in stunned silence until I spoke what was on my mind, "Hikaru just got bitch slapped by Haruhi. Yeowch." It wasn't that I didn't hear anything else in that moment of high tension and drama; it was just that I was surprised almost as much at Haruhi as I was at Hikaru, who had now stormed off upstairs, followed quickly by Kaoru, "Kurt, what do you…"

"Shhhh!" Kurt shushed me? Oh hell no!

"There world is still so small. It's such a shame." Tamaki said softly, running his hand through his hair. Haruhi sat back down at the table and apologized to Arai, who waved his hands in dismissal of the apology and stood up, walking to the door.

"Really? You had to catch that one thing that Tamaki said? Really?" I said, throwing a wad of napkin that I had dipped in some water at Kurt's face. He shrugged and got up from the table, heading upstairs, "Seriously? Don't just walk away from me you jerkwad! I just sat there for hours watching you watch them, and you don't even say anything to me!"

I entered the room and watched Kurt throw the shutters open and lean out of the window.

"Kurt, what the hell are you doing?"

"SHHH!" He shushed me again! Fuck no, "Get over here and shush." I rolled my eyes and walked over, leaning out the window next to him. Big fucking deal. Arai was leaning on his bike getting ready to go. I heard Haruhi utter another goodbye before Hikaru came outside.

"What the…"

"SHHH!" I stuck my tongue out at Kurt, simultaneously punching him in the shoulder as forcefully as I could.

"I'm sorry. I was out of line." Hikaru was apologizing, good for him. I knew that they were a bunch of good guys.

"See, Kurt, Hikaru is apologizing…"

"SHH!" Again with the shushing! See if I was going to give him any sex tonight. Pssshhh.

"Kaoru. Is there a reason why you're pretending to be Hikaru?" Haruhi asked, grabbing Hikaru, no Kaoru apparently, by the cheek. Damn twins. Well, at least _Kaoru_ knew that Hikaru needed to apologize.

"I don't think Hikaru's temper is going to let up anytime soon; He's no fun when he's like this. Can I ask you a favor, Haruhi? Would you go on a date with me tomorrow?"

"What the hel…" Kurt swung me a dirty look. Damn him, "hello?" I walked over to the bed and sat down in major confusing.

"Kathrin, Kathrin, Kathrin." Kurt said patronizingly as he walked towards the bed and sat down, taking my hand in his, "It seems that we are witnessing the makings of a love triangle. A complete twin sandwich, if I may use your phrasing. This is going to be interesting."

There was that word again. _Interesting_. I was beginning to not like interesting things very much.

IIIII

I walked sluggishly up the stairs after getting a call from someone that they had found one of my shirts in the lost and found. Come to find out, there was no lost and found and no shirt in the make believe lost and found.

"Twin, what were you doing in Haruhi's room?" I caught one of the Hitachiin brothers sneaking out of the room that Haruhi was staying in and back down the hallway towards his room.

"Kate-sempai, It's Kaoru. I was just helping her get ready for her date today." Kaoru said in a hushed voice, moving his hand up to give me the 'shhh' signal. What is the deal with people shushing me?

"Helping her get ready for a date she is going on with you? That's kind of awkward." Not to mention stuck up, arrogant, and selfish. Who the hell gives their partner the clothes to wear on their first date?

"She isn't going on the date with me; she is going on the date with Hikaru. Now shhh." Kaoru turned the doorknob of their room and entered without making a sound like the sneaky fox he was. All of a sudden I felt exhausted and went back into the room, flopping onto the bed, trying to will myself to sleep.

"Kate, get up, we have to go." Kurt tapped my shoulder with his hand. Grrr. No me gusta el hombre.

"Sucez-le! baissez-vouz! Vous etes une secousse! Vous etes un poulpe!" I grumbled and cursed into my pillow. Let's see you tell me to watch my language now? I can curse how I want and you can't stop me. I can say 'suck it,' 'fuck you,' 'You're a jerk,' and…

"Did you just call me an octopus? After cussing me out in French?"

"Merde." How the hell did he? What? I'm not even save cussing in a foreign language? "You do have a cuss-dar! That's frightening."

"Get up already. I chose to take conversational French in high school. We had a teacher that had a mouth like you, though she never called us octopi."

"If you weren't so gosh damn wonderful, I would smack you." Kurt grinned a small little 'I won' grin as he changed. I was contented to spend the day inside today. I even told Kurt that I would go swimming. Now he had something up his sleeve. He grabbed his keys and bid me to follow him. I had to now. He knew how to curse in French. Though he would never say any of those words, I had to admit that my respect for him had increased. Mental note: find some other language to cuss in. I wonder if he knew what 'Schwanzlutscher' meant. I would use that next time on him and hope that he didn't look it up.

IIIII

""What are we doing?" We had parked behind a shop and had now walked to an entire row of shops. Why? Because this was where the entire Host club was. Haruhi and Hikaru were up ahead, while Kaoru, Tamaki, Honey, Mori, and Kyoya were hanging back, all of them strategically placed so that the couple on the date wouldn't see them. I dramatically turned my head towards where Kurt was hiding behind a bench, kneeling down on the ground and watching the scene unfold, "I repeat. What are we doing?"

"We're following our students while they follow our other students. Clearly they thought that it would be fun to see how the date is going between Hikaru and Haruhi. Watching them watch those two gives us something to do. It's entertaining at least."

"I see how it is. You lure someone in with a false sense of security, acting like you are so sweet and innocent, but then you turn out to be as devious and meddlesome as the twins."

"You are wrong on one thing. I have always been this way; you just have chosen not to see it because of the sweet and innocent air of my being. Besides, the twins have this perfected to an even greater extent than I do." Kurt had a point with that one. He was thirty one and they were fifteen. Imagine the growth that they still had left, becoming even better at what they do. I shivered just thinking about it.

Kurt moved slowly forward, earning the inquisitive glances of some of the people who actually came here to shop.

"See, nothing's going on. They're just being stupid like normal. Let's go get dinner. I am starving." I sighed after an undisclosed period of time where I had followed him as he followed them as they followed Haruhi and Hikaru.

"While they have been being pretty stupid, you haven't been paying attention so you would know to what extent. It's actually been pretty hilarious. If this was a movie you would be laughing." Kurt turned around, grabbing my hand and pulling me down behind him. Now I really couldn't see anything, though I really didn't care to to begin with. As much as I do have a sense of curiosity, I don't have a sense of spontaneity, which means that this whole thing just annoyed me more than interested me.

"Kurt. Can we go now? I am hungry, and I saw a bar a ways back. Pleeeese?" I whined. Sometimes the only way to get what you want is to act like a little kid. At least it worked with people that loved you, which is good because Kurt stood up, smiled at me, grabbing my hand and heading back to the car. Thank God.

IIIII

"I love vodka! I love vodka!" I sang as I quickly gulped down the rest of a martini as Kurt gave some yen to the waiter after out meal.

"You are one of those strange people who doesn't get drunk, loves the taste of alcohol, but isn't an alcoholic. How are we dating?"

"Because you love me, and I love vodka!" I stood up when he did and latched my arm around his, leaning my head on his shoulder, "Would you like it better if I _were_ an alcoholic?" Kurt looked down at me, his eyes giving me that 'really?' look, "I didn't think so."

_Tell me that you're alright_

_Yeah, everything is alright_

_Oh please…_

"Hello? Goddess speaking." We both got outside. It had started raining while we were at dinner. I loved the rain.

"Miss Amendier, this is Kyoya. Can you help us?" Kyoya was asking for help? Since when?

"What is it? Is something wrong?" Kurt and I ran towards his pick-up, getting in the truck. He turned on the car, the sudden start of the engine making me jump a bit.

"Hikaru and Haruhi are somewhere out in the storm. We do not know where they are. They had gotten separated. Hikaru has been looking for her, but his cell phone must have died because we cannot reach him, nor can we get a location on the GPS of his phone." Kyoya could track the Host club members by their phone? Wait, wasn't he the one who got me this phone? Shit. Wait, back up Kate, that isn't what is important now.

"Alright, we will find them and bring them back to the Pension." I hung up the phone and looked at Kurt, "Start driving. We have to find Hikaru and Haruhi. They are out here somewhere." I leaned on the doorframe, my forehead pressed against the cool glass, watching the rain smack against the gravel road.

We stopped and asked as many people who were still out in the middle of the storm if they had seen either one. If I remembered correctly, Haruhi had told me after the whole beach incident that she was afraid of thunder. That was not good. She was out here, possibly all alone. I had to help her. I had to find her. Hikaru…when I got my hands on him he was going to be dead. I am sure he was going to get a few words from Tamaki and Kaoru, but I was going to let him have it. You protect the people you love. If you can't simply do that then what can you do?

"Kurt! There, look at that church!" The large double doors were cracked open, a large brass cross looming out front. If I wasn't so worried I would take time to express the metaphor of this, but other than a brief thought, it didn't matter. We parked and both of us ran out of the car and into the chapel.

"Haruhi! Hikaru!" I screamed. Suddenly, Hikaru popped out from under the communion table. I looked at Kurt and ran over to where the teenager was standing, ready to let into him when I noticed that Haruhi was underneath the table, covered in a white sheet, and sound asleep.

"Let's get her back. Hikaru, can you wait her while we get her back to the pension? There isn't enough room for all four of us to fit." Kurt reached down and picked up Haruhi, cradling her in his arms. She didn't wake up, which was good.

"Yeah. Just get her to safety, alright." Hikaru said gruffly, a small crack in his voice. I moved to step forward and follow Kurt to the car when I noticed that Hikaru's eyes were red, like he had been crying.

"Why don't I stay with Hikaru? That way you can lay down Haruhi in the car, and we don't have to worry about this idiot." Kurt looked at me and nodded knowingly. As soon as I heard the truck pull away I turned to Hikaru and pulled him into a hug, "I'm glad you're safe, Hikaru. Everyone was worried about you." It was a small lie. I really didn't know if they were worried about him or not, odds are they thought the same way I had in the car, but with him here I couldn't give him the smack down. Call me sensitive or whatever.

"I'm such a moron. I can't control my emotions, and I don't know how to say what I'm feeling without just blurting it out in the worst way possible. I wish I was more like Kaoru." His voice had a tinge of the anger that I had beheld the day before when he was talking to Arai, but I could tell that he was hurting by the way he still clung to me. Of the entire Host club, besides Kyoya and Mori, Hikaru was the last one I would have thought to have some maternal bond with. Plus, wishing he was more like his brother. The two of them were so alike at times it was sickening; however, I had observed that Kaoru was easier to get along with if they were separated.

"Maybe we could learn a few things from one another. I don't let my emotions out, and you can't seem to keep them in." I chuckled, trying to be funny. It wasn't working. Hikaru backed up from me and sat down on one of the pews, staring at the floor, his head in his hands. I sat beside him and ruffled his hair before putting one of my hands on his knee. Knowing what I wanted to say and hoping that I could say it with earnestness and compassion, "There is nothing wrong with being blunt, but when what you say has the power to hurt someone deeply then the way that it comes out needs to be put in check. You can't just live your entire life without a filter because you'll get bitch-slapped again, no offence meant. I know you are capable of being a decent guy, but you just need to bring that out more. You need to be more concerned about how people are going to react to you, which means you need to pay attention to them."

"Kaoru told me the same thing. So did Tamaki when I called him to pick me up. He practically yelled it at me." So Tamaki had already talked to Hikaru, and had already yelled at him. Good. He didn't need it again. "I should have listened. I'm such an idiot." I opened my mouth to comfort him when I heard the chapel door swing open, and turned to look.

"Hikaru! You're safe. Daddy's so glad that you're okay!" What the hell was Tamaki doing here? I looked back towards Hikaru whose eyes had widened considerably and had begun to tear up once again.

"Tono?" I smiled as Hikaru was forced to stand up, pulled up by the force of Tamaki's hug, "Tono, you're crushing me."

"Come on, let's get back in the car and head out." Kurt yelled from the doorway, smiling at me. So that was what Tamaki came for. I looked back at the boys, Hikaru suddenly having a large grin on his face as Tamaki rambled on about how he was so worried about darling children. Despite how creepy that was, the Host club King did care about his friends or, as Kaoru had said, his family.

"Wait a second. There isn't room for all of us in the truck." I observed, my smile sinking back into a frown as I glared at Kurt who just shrugged.

"That's okay! I brought a commoners poncho! You can use them in the rain so that you don't get wet and don't have to carry around an umbrella! Though I'm not exactly sure how to put it on." I watched for a few seconds while Tamaki tried to put the yellow poncho on the wrong way.

"Give me that damn thing. American's use them too, so I'll get in the back. Besides, you two can't afford to get sick because school starts in a few weeks." I grabbed the poncho from Tamaki and put it on. Aw hell, I looked like a duck, plus it was about five inches too long for me. Where the hell did he get this thing anyways?

"Oh Ame-sempai, your chivalry will not go unrewarded!" Tamaki brandished his hands in the air, trying to look graceful as we all made a run for the car.

"Shut-up and get in!" I grabbed the blond haired teen by the back of his shirt and threw him into the car while Hikaru was holding open the car door. The twin gave me a nod and a smile before getting in himself. Yeah, fantastic. I give one small bit of advice, I give of myself and act all sensitive and here is where it gets me, sitting in the bed of a pick-up wearing a big yellow poncho. Why me?


	20. Operation Chicken Noodle Soup

Operation Chicken Noodle Soup

"Kate, Kate wake up."

"Five more minutes," I growled into the pillow at Kurt who was forcefully shaking my shoulder. I could barely feel his touch, though I knew that I was being shaken pretty hard because my nose was getting squished from side to side on the pillow as my head moved back and forth. Trying to roll over onto my back while trying to open my eyes failed the first time I tried, so I tried again. Failure. Exhaustion, deep exhaustion. One more time. Success! I opened my eyes, barely being able to see out them. I rolled on my back, barely being able to breathe as a sporadic series of coughs spewed from my filthy maw. Oh _The Faerie Queen_. I'm a nerd even when I am dying. Awesome.

"You look horrible." Kurt loomed over me, his face inches away from mine. If he kissed me now I was going to vomit down his esophagus. Gross, yes, but that was how I felt. Deal with it.

"Thanks for the confidence, Kurt. I am perfectly fine." I tried to sit up, only to start hacking again and falling backwards only to get slapped upside the head by the backboard of the bed, "Owwwiiiieee." I said in an awkward tone of voice that sounded like some mixture between the voice of Honey and the creepy _Grudge_ girl sound. I whimpered. I coughed because of the whimper. I cough-whimpered because I coughed after the whimper.

"Let me feel your head." Kurt said softly, feeling my forehead with the back of his cheek. I curled my lip into a sad pout, "It seems that you have a fever. In my professional medical opinion...you're sick!"

"Brilliant," cough, "deduction," cough cough, "Watson." Cough. Cough cough. Oh, and cough. Just fucking fantastic. That damn poncho obviously didn't work. Hey, at least I did the noble thing and kept my students from getting deathly sick weeks before going back to school. Screw noble! I hate being sick almost as much as I hate stupid people. Have I gone on a stupid people rant yet? No? You've been spared.

"Your cynicism is only going to make you feel worse. I would suggest that you stay here while I go talk to Misuzu and get you some water, tea, and medicine. I assume that you don't feel like eating anything?" I nodded at Kurt and he just smiled, kissing my forehead before getting up and walking out the door.

"Screw" cough "this." Cough attack. Pause.

I love how I can't even think when I cough. I stared up at the ceiling. When was Kurt going to be back? Why was this happening to me? Why weren't there any tiles on the ceiling for me to count? I'm so bored! I looked over at my iHome. It was only nine in the morning, and Kurt had only been gone for about two minutes. Damn this. I shifted the covers off of my body and swung my legs off of the bed, having to pause because of another death-match in my bronchiole tubes.

Not today dirty little virus. Like hell I was going to let some virus corrupt the rest of my stay in Karuizawa. I was going to enjoy my summer regardless of the invasion of the cell snatchers. Nein, net, nunca, not, no.

I stood up, wobbling a little bit before regaining my balance and walking towards the closet, picking out jeans and a t-shirt from the Broadway production of _Spamalot_ that said 'I'm not dead yet.' Oh the irony. I was not dead _yet_, but I was pretty damn close.

"Kathrin Joy Amendier. You get back in bed this instant, or I will make you." Kurt was back. Yay, so thrilling. He came towards me and grabbed me around the waste, lifting me off the ground and placing me back in bed. Amidst fits of hacking up a lung, I tried to struggle. Epic fail. Kurt managed to not only force me to stay on the bed with one hand, but managed to unbutton and take of my jeans and put on my pajama bottoms in all under two minutes. I knew he was good at taking off clothes, but who knew he was so excellent at putting them on again?

"I wanna go play!" I moaned to him. Forget the physical fighting; I would just resort to whining like I did yesterday.

"You are staying in bed. Here, drink this." Kurt handed me a cup of tea that was brown and as thick as mud. To be honest, I wasn't entirely sure that it wasn't mud. To be even more honest, I couldn't be sure it wasn't shit because it smelled pretty bad. I shook my head, crushing my lips together, "Kathrin."

His eyes were hard to resist. I wined like a puppy. If I had had a tail it would have been between my legs. Then again, I never really understood that expression because, by nature, tails are supposed to be situated between the legs in their bone structure.

"Kathrin Joy. Drink. The. Tea." You know that someone's serious when they make sure that they pause significantly between their words. Also when they use more than one of your names at the same time. I took the tea, holding my nose and tipping the cup so the liquid would go in my mouth. I was right. It was shit. It even tasted like shit.

"Kate. I have to go to the next town over to get some antibiotics for you. The pharmacy here is closed today for some reason. Before you say anything, I had Kyoya ask one of the doctors in the Ootori group to file a prescription for you. I have my cell phone on me. Let me know if you need anything. Stay in bed and get some rest. Haruhi will be coming in to check on you in a little bit." I opened my mouth to respond, but Kurt just put a finger over my mouth, kissed my forehead like he had before, and walked out of the room. I was alone again.

_I'm so sick,_

_Infected with…_

I swung my hand over and shut up the stupid iHome. I liked that Flyleaf song, but right now I didn't need to be reminded of the fact that my body was being attacked by microorganisms that wanted to invade my cells and gene splice my DNA so that it could clone itself. Someone paid attention in BIO101. I looked over at the clock on my iHome. 9:14. Fuck me.

I could be doing so many things right now like swimming, or eating good food, or planning an attack on Hikaru and Kaoru, having Tamaki play a song at the piano so that I could sing to it, lounge in the sun with a martini, drink a martini. No. I had to be bored as hell. There was no television; I hadn't brought my laptop or any books. I couldn't talk to myself because if I tried to talk I would cough up my other lung along with the one that was probably sitting on the floor by my bed, sizzling in the sunlight. Maybe that was a bit extreme.

I could stare into the abyss and slip slowly into madness. Who am I kidding? I am already mad.

I've got a lovely bunch of coconuts, didily de de. There they are a' standin' in the road. Bum, Bum, Bum. Big ones, small ones, some as big as your head. 'Just give em' a twist, a flick o' your wrist' that's what the showman said. Oh, I've got a lovely bunch of coconuts, didily de de. Every one you throw will make me rich. Here comes me wife, the idol of me life, singing 'roll a bowl a ball a penny a pitch'.

Yep. Definitely mad.

"Ame-san! Don't die!" Maybe I was bored, but I wasn't _that_ bored. Honey had crashed through the room, riding on Mori's shoulders, before jumping off and landing on the bed, kneeling next to me as Mori pulled up a chair and sat down. I noticed that he had a large textbook-like book in his arms. I raised an eyebrow.

"Honey," cough, "I'm not," cough cough, "Going to die." Cough attack. Honey stared at me sweetly with his brown eyes.

"Here, you can hold Usa-chan. Everytime I get sick he makes me feel a lot better!" Honey gave me his loli-boy grin and held out the marshmallow looking pink bunny. I shook my head 'no.' I really didn't want to transfer my viral laden skin cells to the teenager, "I…uh…how about some cake?" Suddenly, Honey pulled a piece of cake out from somewhere. The sight of the wiggling mass of sugar made my stomach roll, and I gagged. Honey's eyes began to water.

"Mitsukuni." Mori said in his deep bass voice as he opened the book to the introduction. I looked at the title and began to weep inside as he started reading from _Understanding Jurisprudence: An Introduction to Legal Theory_. Where were a rope and a high tree branch when you needed it? "'Jurisprudence is ubiquitous. Its concerns are an inescapable feature of the law and legal system. But it is more. As will soon be evident it is both informed by, and has significant implications for, economic, political, and social theory.'"

I didn't know that Mori's voice was more monotone than Haruhi's. Then again I had never heard him say more than a few words at a time, therefore, never needing to utter more than the same tone. Somebody save me from this nightmare.

"Honey-sempai, Mori-sempai. You need to let Kate-sensei get some rest." Haruhi, amazing Haruhi! She walked into the room with another blanket and pillow, also carrying a glass filled with ice and a water bottle. Oh miraculous, multitasking, Haruhi! She came over the bed and I leaned forward so that she could plop the pillow behind me. Not that sitting up had much more exciting of a view than laying down, but at least now I could see the door and the wall; the wallpaper even had a pattern; it was almost as good as counting tiles. I looked over at the clock again. 9:22. Really? This madness had only taken eight minutes? Can't we just time-warp and get this day over with? If Kurt were here he would tell me just how that idea would disrupt the time-space continuum and overwhelm the laws of physics and gravity. That would be better than law theory performed by a robot. No offence, Mori.

"Here, Kate-sensei, drink this glass of water with these aspirin. Misuzu said that the aspirin could help lower your fever until Hisugawa-sensei get's back with the antibiotics. Just make sure that you drink this entire glass of water with it." Haruhi set down the ice-filled glass and filled it from the bottled water that she was carrying, placing the aspirin down next to the glass, motioning to the two third year students, and leaving the room, Mori and Honey following her.

9:24 and I was alone again. Thank you, God. Thank you. I reached over and took the aspirin, making sure that I did what Haruhi said and draining the entire glass of water. The cool liquid itched my throat as it went down, a feeling which was rather similar to wet sand getting in all the wrong places. Not a wonderful feeling whatsoever.

_Knock, Knock, Knock_

'While I nodded, nearly napping, suddenly there came a tapping, as of someone gently rapping, rapping at my chamber door.' Edgar Allen Poe was my man. Gothic and macabre. I vote 'yes.' I was beginning to notice that when I don't talk, I feel so much smarter. I've just been firing off these literary references all day.

"Kate-sempai. It's Hikaru. Can I come in?" Ha. Not by the hair of my chinny, chin, chin. Ooo, another reference. I'm on fire. Ah. With a fever that was mostly true. Oh the irony.

"Come," cough cough, "in." This might just be lining myself up for some torture, but I guess that was kind of expected since he was a twin. At least he announced himself before he came it. That way I wouldn't have to guess which twin it was. Hikaru opened one of the double doors, walking in and taking the seat that Mori had used when he was in the room.

"I just wanted to thank you for what you said last night. It's my fault that you got sick because you and Hisu-sempai had to come and get us. Do you forgive me?" Hikaru was being surprisingly kind, but he did have a tough time last night. I smiled at him and nodded my forgiveness, choking back a cough so that I wouldn't ruin the tender moment, "Hey, Hikaru. She said that she would forgive you!" The twin in the chair grinned at me savagely as the other door to the room opened and another grinning twin entered the room, making a place for himself at the end of the bed.

I blinked at the twin at the ends of the bed as the one who was sitting in the chair got up and moved towards the end of the bed and sat, the two of them seated in my direct gaze in mirrored positions. Damn them. Damn them both to hell. It was Kaoru who made the apology, not Hikaru. They fooled me.

I readied myself to scream at them both as the smirked their little fox smirks at me, but as soon as I opened my mouth a rage of coughs ejected from my mouth. Great. I can't even take vocal revenge out on the twins.

"Hikaru! Kaoru! Didn't you hear me when I told Mori-sempai and Honey-sempai to leave Kate-sensei alone?" Haruhi to the rescue! I truly loved that young woman. She was not only intelligent, adorable, and amazing; she was also able to withstand the Host club. That was a talent. Haruhi had brought another cup of hot tea. She set it down on the bedside table and walked towards the edge of the bed, glaring at Hikaru and Kaoru until they walked out of the room on their own accord. They went out sniggering and looking back towards me with shifty eyes. I guess you can't have everything.

I looked over at the tea that Haruhi had put down. It was the shit tea again. I curled up my nose and drank it, coughing up bits of my esophagus this time. They went to go join my two lungs in organ heaven. I sighed when the spats finally stopped and looked over at the clock. 9:29.

WHHHHYYYY MEEEEEE?

"Ame-sensei!" A smooth tenor voice crept towards my ears as the double doors to the room opened, admitting the golden haired Host club king to enter. I leaned my head back against the headboard, willing Tamaki not to be there, "It is so tragic to see you laying in bed like this. I thought for sure that the commoner's poncho would work. I guess you can't trust commoner's wisdom in everything, no matter how convenient and cheap it may be, can you?" Tamaki was making wild gestures with his hands, which was rather frightening since he had a steaming bowl of something in his hands.

"Tamaki, I" I…I…I…I cough. I cough a lot. I cough so much that I can't say anything, at least not anything that over extends the normal Mori talking limit.

"Don't speak, Ame-sensei." Tamaki had sat next to me on my side of the bed and grabbed my hand with one of his, thankfully placing down the steaming bowl on the vacant chair, "I can tell everything you need to say by your lovely eyes. It's such a shame that your illness is driving us all apart, and my love is not strong enough to be an antidote. I'm sorry." He looked down dramatically, kissing the top of my hand. Schmoozer.

Tamaki, it must be hell inside your head. I wanted to say it, but I would have coughed up the rest of my esophagus, and that wouldn't have been pretty. Besides, now that he had kissed my germ laden hand, he was probably going to get sick. That is, unless he had some insane immune boosters, which, knowing my luck, he did, and there would be no sweet revenge. FML.

"Ame-sensei, I hope you can accept this bowl of soup, and that it helps nurse you back to good health." I took the steaming bowl that was handed to me and bowed my head to show my thanks. I enjoyed the hot steam caressing my face, so I closed my eyes and smelled. It kind of smelled a bit off. Oh well, I was getting hungry and soup wouldn't make me want to vomit up my stomach.

"I wouldn't eat that if I were you. The broth is probably clumped and the noodles stuck to the bottom of the bowl." Kyoya's evil voice warned as he walked into the room, looking up from his notebook for a second before sticking his nose back into it and scribbling a note. I took his warning and looked down at the soup. He was one hundred percent correct. Some of the noodles were even turning a brownish color as they floated in murky broth that, as Kyoya said, was slightly clumped. Gross. I sneered at it, sending Tamaki into the corner.

I couldn't deal with this anymore. I needed someone to just smack me in the head with a 2X4 and get it over with. Knock me out so my body gets the rest it needs, and I don't have to deal with these insane people any longer. Please. Somebody? Anybody?

_Tell me that your alright_

_Yeah, everything is alright_

_Oh please tell me…_

"Hello?" Cough, cough, cough, cough.

"Darlin'? Are you sick, dear? Oh my poor girl."

"Mom?" I grabbed a swig of the water bottle, forcing myself to choke back all the coughs that were going to come my way. Calling my cell phone long distance was expensive. Why was she calling me?

"'Oh, darling. I am so sorry for botherin' ya'll like this, but I had to cancel my ticket to come out there. I'm so sorry, darlin.'"

"Mom, Mom, don't worry about it. It's okay. I understand. Is everything okay?" I coughed a little bit, but was able to force most of them back down. It hurt, but the pain was worth it.

"You know you mama and how tired she gets when travelin.' I was thinkin' that it'd be hard for me to come out there right now, ya know? I still want to see you though, so I bought you and that handsome gentleman in those pictures you sent a ticket to come see. Ain't that just peachy keen, jellybean?"

"Um. Mom. You don't have that kind of money." She really didn't. She was living off court compensation from my father's trial, as well as her disability check. It wasn't like she didn't have savings, but I knew that she wouldn't break into that account until she absolutely needed to.

"Darlin,' you are my only chil', and I wants to see you this summer, ya hear? Those two tickets though… y'all know how to print them off of that techno box?"

"The computer? Yeah, Mom. I can." Even though my mom was only fifty-six, the fact that she grew up in the south, and the fact that she had always been technologically challenged even since the first colored television came out, made her seem a bit older than her age. Not to mention all of the health issues that she suffered.

"Alrighty, sugarpie. I just caint wait to see you and that man of yours. You get better now, ya hear. That way we can spend some quality time together next week when y'all get here."

"Next week? What?"

"G'bye!"

I held the phone out from my ear and looked at it quizzically. My mom told me specifically that there was no way she could afford a plane ticket for herself without my help, which is why I had been sending her money. Now she had somehow procured two tickets with only a week's notice, meaning that they would be extra expensive. How come she had avoided my questions? What was she thinking?

"Kate, I'm back! I brought some chicken noodle soup for you. Kyoya called me and said that…" Kurt entered the room, looking from Tamaki to Kyoya, then looking at what the two of them were staring at: Me, small tears dropping on the screen of the phone that was flashing the words 'call ended.'

IIIII

A/N – Oh no! What is going on? Well, I do have an idea but you'll have to stick around to figure it out. I will tell you that next chapter we will be going to America! Speaking of America, Happy Fourth of July! Woooohoooo!

Let's see. I am not entirely sure what to say about the references in this chapter because Kate kind of explained them. Oh, the line that Kurt says about his medical opinion and whatnot…if that seems familiar it is probably because you have seen Fruits Basket. Shigure says it in one of the episodes. Just thought I would give credit to the creator of that line.

I hope that you all enjoyed this chapter, and you can show your appreciation by doing this thing called reviewing. I'd really appreciate it!


	21. It's All Fun and Games 'Till Someone

A/N – Hello all! Thank you for tuning in for Chapter 21. I can't believe that this had gone this far, actually. Originally I had only planned it to be a very episodic 10-12 chapter thing, but then a plot finally came to me, and I decided to drag it out. I am glad that I did though because this has turned into one of my favorite stories (including my actual fiction) that I have written. I appreciate all the input, including the message that I got saying that there needed to be more twincest. Well, you are in luck because the twins were voted third to come to America with Kate. The songs used in this chapter are "Love Me Dead" by Ludo and "Miserable at Best" by Mayday Parade.

If you enjoy it, please review! Thanks!

IIIII

It's All Fun and Games 'Till Someone Loses an Eye

That was probably the longest flight I had ever been on. I had been on numerous flights that were over ten hours long, but a flight where it was impossible to fall asleep while your flight companion was snoring on your shoulder for the full fifteen hours made it long and boring. I felt like I was going to drop dead any moment, not to mention I still had the sniffles from when I had a fever in Karuizawa.

"That flight went by so fast. I think I slept the entire way. Did you get some rest?" Kurt asked all happy and smiley. I resisted the urge to flip him off as we took the escalator down from the baggage claim, choosing instead to give him a quick 'shut-up' glare and gaze outside of the floor to ceiling windows at the myriad of taxies and palm trees. You know you're in San Diego when you can count as many palm trees as there are people. Actually, the palm tree wasn't even native to California. California was technically a desert; even the coast was technically considered a desert. Palm trees were in native to tropical regions; therefore, they weren't native to California. Thank God for useless information.

"Katykay! Hey, girl, hey!" I whirled around quickly after stepping off of the escalator. A grin coming to my face when I heard the too familiar rhyme.

"Jaime!" Jamie, my 6'4" Mexican man, ran towards me, grabbing me around the middle and twirling me around in a hug, "How's my main squeeze?" I reached my arm up and ruffled his russet colored hair before turning towards where Kurt was staring at us blankly, "Jaime Garcia, meet Kurt Hisugawa. Kurt, this is Jaime."

"It's Kutano, for now. Nice to meet you." I squinted my eyes at Kurt for being, well, curt.

"Damn girl. You picked an Asian hottie." Jaime whispered in my ear, slapping me on the ass before grabbing my arm and walking with me towards the baggage claim. Kurt followed, grumbling something to himself quietly enough that I couldn't hear him, "So, Katykay. How's Jap-land? I've been looking at the pictures you've been sending me. Those boys you've been hanging out with. Daaaaamn girl!"

"Jaime, they are my students and are all ten years younger than you. Don't be a pedo." I smacked his shoulder playfully, "Oh look, there's my bag." I pointed out a brown marine-type duffel bag. Jaime reached out to grab it, but Kurt was quicker as he knocked Jaime's hand out of the way and grabbed my bag. My Mexicali boy gave me a smirk behind Kurt's back as Kurt grabbed his black suitcase from the belt. Jaime reached his hand out to offer help with one of the bags, but Kurt just shook his head and stared at Jaime. More like, death glared at him. Kurt was jealous. Hahahaha. Oh that was just way too much. So fucking hilarious.

Jaime rolled his eyes at me knowingly, grabbing my arm again while walking towards the doors leading to the parking lot. Kurt grabbed my hand forcefully, arranging my bag over his shoulders so that it didn't knock either of us in the arm, dragging his own bag with his other hand.

"This is so nice. I'm in between my two favorite people." I grinned, feeling Kurt squeeze my hand, looking down at me and smiling one of his kind, large toothy grins. As soon as he shifted his gaze forward again, Jaime jiggled my arm a bit to get my attention, looking at me in the eye and raising his eyebrows multiple times.

"So, Kutano Hisugawa. How did you and Katykay meet?" Jaime asked. He already knew this story. I had been e-mailing him off and on since I had gotten to Japan. Jaime and I had been friends since we were in elementary school, but since we both had gone to different colleges as undergraduates, and he moved to Seattle shortly after we both graduated. I rarely ever saw him; in fact, it had probably been over a year since I had actually seen him. I knew him well though. I knew he was just prodding.

"It's a long story. We just found one another one night. You could say that I fell for her right then." I burst into laughter, remembering the first night we met and how he did actually fall, or tripped, but let's not open that up again. We got to Jaime's sleek black mustang. It had to be my favorite car in the world for being a passenger in and driving in. My Mexicali opened the trunk and Kurt slung the bags in, quickly moving in front of me and Jaime so that he could open the car door for me. Jaime gave me another curious glance and I just shrugged, getting into the car.

Kurt was just radiating with bad vibes. At least now I knew he loved me enough to get jealous of one of my male friends. Then again, it was quite amusing to me that Kurt was jealous of Jaime because Jaime was one of the most flamingly gay people that I knew. He didn't act like a fruit, but he definitely was _not_ straight. If anything I should be the one who should be jealous, especially since the first time that I sent a picture of Kurt and I to Jaime, my Mexicali-man's first response was, "Damn girl, I'd like to play catch with that ass-candy of yours." It made me choke down a laugh just thinking about it.

"Katykay, I am so excited you're here!" Jaime said enthusiastically, grabbing my hand with his and then hitting the play button on the CD player.

"Woohoo! Our song!" I yelled as music began piping through the car speakers, ignoring the fact that I could see Kurt staring at our clasped hands, a deserted puppy look on his face. I almost wanted to jump in the backseat and nuzzle up against him to make him feel better, but this was good for him. No pain, no gain, character building, and all of those idiomatic phrases, "'Love me cancerously like a salt sore soaked in the sea. High maintenance means you're a gluttonous queen, narcissistic, and mean.'"

"Kill me romantically. Fill my soul with vomit than ask me for a piece of gum. Bitter and dumb, you're my sugar plum. You're awful, I love you!" Jaime continued the first verse, the both of us laughing uproariously as we sung along with the chorus.

"She moves through moonbeams slowly. She knows just how to hold me, and when her edges soften her body is my coffin. I know she drains me slowly. She wears me down to bones in bed. Must be the sign on my head that says '_Oh fuck me dead!'_"

"Didn't it say 'love me dead'?" Kurt asked after Jaime and I had yelled the last line as loud as we could, receiving dazed and confused looks from the people in the cars next to us on the highway.

"Honey, it's called artistic license." Jaime looked up at Kurt in the rearview mirror, giving him the 'your retarded' look. I really didn't need any animosity between my significant other and my best friend, but it was so amusing to watch the two of them have a staring contest through the rearview mirror. It was a good thing that we had reached a red light, or else we would probably be dead. Jaime drove like a grandmother, but he drove that way because he got incredibly distracted while driving. That is probably why I usually drove. Jaime had to break the stare once the light turned green, and I looked back at Kurt who had folded his hands, his body language saying that he was please with himself.

I've said it before, and I'll say it again: Stupid boys and their stupid boy penises. Really? Masculine pride was something I could understand, but the masculine competitive drive escaped me most of the time unless it was fixated on football or some other sport.

"What are y'all doin' in my yard then? I tole them that if they let in those foreigners move into that low-profit neighborhood there'd be a thief commin' every day. Tell the truth you little scamps, of I'll teach y'all a lesson right now." I heard my mom yelling at the top of her lungs as we parked and I ran out of the car. The woman was walking up the steps to her small two bedroom home, an ear held pinched in between two of her ears, two boys connected to those two ears.

"Kate-sempai, help us!" One of the vagrants held captive by my mother screamed in perfect English, only a small bit of a noticeable accent.

"She's trying to kill us!" The other one yelled afterwards.

"Hikaru? Kaoru? What the hell are you two doing here?" Vacation is really a foreign concept to people. It must be.

"Kathrin! My baby!" Mom suddenly forgot about the two twins who were now rubbing their inflamed ears, both of them sobbing in pain, as she ran at me and grabbed me into a hug. I couldn't take my eyes off of the twins though. It was quite pathetic watching them, but I wanted to laugh at them more than I wanted to comfort them. I am a horrible human being.

"Hi mom. Long time no see." I gave her a hug back. Mom was a few inches shorter than me, which was quite surprising since I am super short in general, but that didn't mean that she didn't have power.

"Ain't everything just peachy now that my girls home." Jaime walked over to Mom and gave her a kiss on the cheek, handing the paper that had been on the driveway towards her. She rolled it up. I knew what was coming, "You two!" She shouted at the twins who were still sulking, pointing the now rolled up newspaper at them, "How come" _whack_, "you didn't" _whack_, "tell me" _whack_, "you knew," _whack_, "my little" _whack_, "Kathrin?" She put the newspaper down at her side, "That's insensitive. I swear, they don't teach boy manners anymore."

3

2

1

_Whack_

I knew that was coming. It wasn't a 2X4, but it was still effective. Not to mention I could see Kurt laughing as he walked up to me, grabbing my hand. It was the fly image again; I was sure of it.

"Mom. I'd like you to meet someone." I pushed Kurt a little bit forward, and he bowed towards my mom.

"Why, I ain't a god or nothing.' Stop that bowin' and give momma some suga' like a normal man." I swallowed a giggle as Kurt was pulled down by the collar into a hug, receiving what I expected to be a wet and lipstick layered kiss on the cheek. Yep. I was right. Kurt had a pink temporary tattoo on his cheek. Jaime took that moment to be a jerk and smack Kurt's shoulder with his own as he carried mine and Kurt's bags into Mom's house, "Well, time to get cookin'. Y'all must be hungry." My mom wiped off her hands and walked through the door, Kurt following.

"Hikaru. Kaoru. What are you two doing here?" I grabbed the two twins by the wrists and pulled them off the steps, turning them so that they were facing me. Their eyes were still moist from the tears they had spilled when Mom had hit them. Damn. She must have hit them harder than I thought.

"Our mother is in L.A. for a photo shoot." The one wearing headphones replied. If I remembered correctly, this one was Hikaru, because I rarely saw Kaoru listening to music.

"She said that Hikaru and I could take the car and go wherever we wanted for a few days." Kaoru said. At least this time I had guessed right, and had something tangible to go off of.

"How sweet of you two. You came all this way to see me?" I was touched. Hikaru and Kaoru were good guys; we just happened to butt heads a lot of the time because the two of them were little devils.

"We didn't really do it for you." Hikaru said rather cavalierly. My face feel, and I could tell that they saw it when they latched arms around one another.

"We've been to L.A. a lot of times with our mother, but we've never come to San Diego." Kaoru continued, the both of them slowly walking towards the door.

"It's been two days since we got here, and there really isn't that much to do except go to the beach." Both of them reached the door and turned around simultaneously to look at me as they both opened their mouths in unison, "We're bored."

So that was how it was. They were bored so they found me and decided to interrupt my vacation home. Brilliant idea guys. Brilliant.

"Darlin,' I'm sorry to have to do this to you, but I forgot to pick up somethin's from the store. Y'all got here a lot sooner than I expected you ta, so can you run to the supermarket and pick some hamburger for me. Git whatever else y'all like too."

"Mom, I just got home. Besides, you don't even like…"

"Kathrin, please. Just git what I'm askin' ya to git. Jaime, hunny, with you be a dear and stay here with me? Kathrin, take those little scamps with you." I took a breath and held it, calmly letting it out when Jaime threw me the keys to his mustang. I nodded towards Kurt and he started following me, Hikaru and Kaoru scampering in front of me at the door. Mom probably glared at them.

"Kate, are you okay?" Kurt asked as soon as I got in the car and started backing out of the driveway. It was _that_ obvious. I didn't say anything. I just started driving down the street towards the market, ignoring him completely, turning up the radio.

_Katie don't cry I know_

_You're trying your hardest_

_And the hardest part is letting go_

I caught Hikaru staring me down in my rearview mirror. Ah, that's right, I told him that he should work on expressing his emotions in a better way and said that I needed to work on expressing them in general. Damn you, Hikaru, making me feel guilty.

"There is a reason my Mom called me to come out here, and for only a week. It is like she has been planning something. Our original deal was that she would come to Japan for a month and stay with me. For her to change something like that, well, it's just not like her. And for Jaime to be taking time off from work and driving all the way down here from Washington, well, that isn't like him either."

_Of the nights we shared_

_Ocala is calling and you know it's haunting_

_But compared to your eyes _

_Nothing shines quite as bright_

"What is that guy's problem anyways?" I looked over at Kurt, giving him the best disappointed and 'Hello?' type look as I could muster. Hikaru and Kaoru had both leaned forward from the back and were staring at Kurt the same way I was, Hikaru and Kaoru sat back down in their seats rather violently, both of them roaring with laughter.

_And when we look to the sky, _

_It's not mine, but I want it so_

"What? I am just saying. He couldn't keep his hands off of you." Kurt grumbled the last part, and I started laughing at him. For someone so smart, he could be so incredibly short sighted.

_Let's not pretend like you're alone tonight_

_I know he's there and_

"Kaoru, I wonder if Jai-san is the pitcher or the catcher." Hikaru asked his brother, I curled my bottom lip into my mouth and bit down to keep from laughing.

"I think that he would probably be the pitcher. He's friends with Kate-sempai so he has to be able to keep up. That would mean that he has to be forceful at some point." Kaoru analyzed. I bit down harder when Kurt looked at me with confused eyes and then turned to look at the twins the same way.

"If you don't understand, we aren't explaining." The twins said together. This time I couldn't help it; I just burst out laughing.

_You're probably hanging out and making eyes_

_While across the room he stairs_

_I'll bet he gets the nerve to walk the floor_

_And ask my girl to dance, she'll say yes_

"Pitcher? Catcher? Why does it make a difference? If you've had or have some type of relationship with that man then I think I deserve to know."

_Because these words were never _

_Easier for me to say_

_Than her to second guess_

"Oh don't worry, Hisu-sempai. I don't think that there was _ever_ anything going on between Kate-sempai and Jai-san." Hikaru laughed out, putting it in the exact words I would have put it in. I put the car in park and turned it off, getting out of the car and walking towards the supermarket.

"American supermarket, American supermarket!" The twins ran ahead of us, arm and arm, towards the double doors, while I grabbed a cart.

"Have you slept with him?" Kurt was just not going to let this go, was he? I knew that he was as gossipy as a prom queen, but was he really this dense?

"Kurt. I am going to tell you once, and I am going to let you figure the answer to your question yourself." I paused for effect, nearly giggling when I saw such expectance in his eyes, "Jaime likes people with penises. Something, as you know, I am lacking." I turned away and went into the store, trying to find the twins.

"Oh." Kurt caught up to me, his hands behind his back and his head hanging down, a slight blush on his cheeks. I patted him on the back comfortingly. He was just so adorable when he was embarrassed, and with his bangs hanging down in front of his eyes and on the sides of his face…delicious.

Hikaru and Kaoru were over by the fruit, so I walked over so that I was behind them. They were looking at the strawberries, both of them eyeing the fruit as if they had never seen it before, which I knew that they had.

"If you guys want some then put a container in the cart." I sighed, leaning my elbow on the cart's handrail. Suddenly, Hikaru swung his arm around, strawberries in one hand. The strawberries went in the cart, but before they reached their final destination, something detached from the container and flew right at Kaoru.

"Ahhh!" Kaoru yelled, placing his hands over one of his eyes and kneeling on the ground, drawing quite a lot of attention towards us.

"Kaoru! Are you okay? Let me see." Hikaru said frantically, kneeling down and taking Kaoru's face in his hands and gruffly pulling his brother closer to him.

"Hikaru. It stings!" Kaoru cried out, trying to pull away from his brother but failing to do so. They were definitely drawing attention to themselves, mainly from the many woman and girls that were shopping, clearly enthralled by what was going on between the two foreign hotties speaking with an accent. So that is how it was. I sighed, rolling my eyes over to Kurt who was trying to keep from busting out laughing.

"Stay still, Kaoru," Hikaru opened his twin's eye with his fingers and dotted the cornea softly, a small strawberry seed transferring from Kaoru's eye to Hikaru's finger. Properly placed tears now began to flow softly down Kaoru's cheeks, "Kaoru, you need to be more careful."

"I'm sorry, Hikaru. Thank you." Kaoru leaned his head against Hikaru's chest, Hikaru responding by leaning his chin on his brother's head. I heard a few gasps, a few sighs, and I think I even heard someone start clapping.

"Do you guys seriously have to do that nonsense here?" I whispered, grabbing them both by the arm and picking them up off of the floor.

"Kyoya-sempai wanted us to try it in a public place here." Kaoru said bluntly.

"He wanted to see if there could be a market for a Host club in America. Though, we were planning to do something less dangerous." Hikaru added, looking sadly up at his brother.

"Hikaru, I'm fine." Kaoru said. So it was Kyoya? Did he send them here too? I wouldn't put it past him, actually. I let the two of them go and Kurt and I walked a bit further into the meat section when I was grabbed by the elbow by an older woman.

"You have such beautiful sons. I wish my boys got along as well as those two do. But aren't you both a little young to have children?" She looked from Kurt and I to the twins who I am sure were behind me grinning their pretty little fox heads off.

"They aren't our childr…" Kurt and I said almost in perfect synchronization. Fuck. I've been hanging out with these twins way to long. They were already rubbing off on Kurt and me.

"Come on, Mom, Dad! Come look at this over here!" Hikaru and Kaoru said together. One of them grabbing my arm and the other grabbing Kurt's, dragging us off in another direction.

"Like I said. Too young." The woman grumbled to herself. Obviously she had completely changed her mind after beholding the twins pulling me off into the abyss. I would have changed my mind too. How could anyone think that they were sweet and innocent? The thought was incomprehensible.

"How did I get pulled into this? Pick on Kate, not on me." Kurt said, half speaking, half laughing as he patted the twins on the shoulder and went to look at something on the shelf.

"Thanks for the support, daddy." I purred in his ear, slapping him on the ass and grabbing a can of barbeque sauce off of the shelf and placing it in the cart. Kurt shivered at the word 'daddy.'

"The next time you call me that you had better be pregnant, or I will vomit." Kurt hesitated a cautious glance at the twins, making sure that they were completely enthralled with whatever they were doing at the time, walking up to me and kissing me on the neck.

"Kate and Kutano sitting in a tree. K.I.S.S.I.N.G. First comes love, then comes marriage, then comes the baby in the baby carriage." Where the hell did that come from? That was such an old school elementary school song that, I am pretty sure, only was premiered in America. Those two knew how to mock me in my own language with my own culture! They were professionals.

"You two just need to shut your mouths." Kurt grabbed both of them in a headlock, covering each of their mouths with a hand, "Ick! Disgusting." Well, that didn't last long.

"What happened, Kurt?"

"They licked me!" Kurt held his hands away from his body. Hikaru and Kaoru turned towards the both of us, sticking out their tongues at us. I shied away from Kurt's hands, warning him with my eyes that I did not want twin juice on me. For all I knew it could be as acid as their personalities.

"Hikaru. Kaoru. You two get back here or I'll…"

"Hikaru, really, I'm fine. It was an accident, and it worked out in the end. Besides, it isn't as if I'm going blind or anything." I heard Kaoru say as I neared one of the aisles, so I stopped and hid on the end-cap. What? The way Kurt eavesdropped was annoying; the way I did it was stealthy. Big difference.

"I know; I know! Damn it, Kaoru, that's not it. What are we doing here?"

"You know why we are here. Kyoya-sempai said that we should come with our mother after all, so that we could check up on Kate-sempai. He didn't say anything else, and we would stay longer if we could…"

"But we can't because mom goes back to Japan tomorrow." So they actually weren't here on their own accord, and they were actually here for me. For some reason that gave me a lot less peace than it probably should have, and I wasn't sure if I wanted to hear anything else.

"Hikaru, Kaoru, let's go." I turned the corner and grinned at the two boys. I had clearly frightened them as they both jumped in the air. I wanted to cackle maliciously at that fact, but then I figured it would be wasted as that was probably only the second time that I got them, but that they had gotten me anywhere between twenty and one hundred times. The win was sweet, not decadent.

The twins and I went to find Kurt who, as soon as he saw Hikaru and Kaoru, attacked them with his hands, wiping his palms on each of them in rapid succession. I couldn't help but think of a total chick fight, except that this time it was Kurt slapping the twin's backs.

"Boys!" I yelled at them all, the three of them looking up at me with the eyes of a dog that knew it was doing something wrong. Shaking my head at them I picked up my pace and walked towards the cash register, setting everything from the cart on the counter, "What is this?" I asked when I came across a tin of instant coffee.

"We want to bring it back for Tono." Hikaru quickly justified what they had most definitely snuck into the cart.

"We want to see if American instant coffee is different from Japanese instant coffee." Kaoru continued to justify, the both of them looking up at me with their big tawny eyes.

"Fine. If it's for Tamaki." I rolled my eyes and placed the instant coffee on the check-out counter.

"We didn't know you cared about Tono that much."

"I don't. I just wanted to get you two to stop glaring at me. It was making me squeamish." Not entirely true. Tamaki meant a lot to me. All of them did. Somehow or another they had all managed to wedge their way into my life and heart, just like Haruhi said they would. Damn, she was good.

The drive home was, for the most part, silent. Hikaru and Kaoru had both fallen asleep in the backseat; the two of them leaning on one another, Hikaru snuggled under his brother's chin. Even though Hikaru was the older of the two, and he was the one who played the more dominate role in their role-play, I had a feeling that he was actually the more childlike one of the relationship, the one who needed looking after. However, Kaoru was the one who couldn't let go. Wasn't he the one who was so adamant about not breaking up the 'family?' And Hikaru, wasn't he the one who needed the advice, needed the firm guiding hand? The two of them were adorable when they were quiet, it was almost tempting to not wake them up and just leave them in the car. Not just to leave them in the car, but also to keep them from doing anything else to me.

Kurt was also nodding off in the passenger's seat. He had his hand in mine, and I was rubbing his wrist with my thumb. Here was another person that had captured my heart. Completely. It got to the point where I couldn't remember what my life was like before meeting him. Not only had I given him more of myself, my past, and my emotions, than I had given anyone else, I truly trusted him.

I sighed. Haruhi _was_ right. I am sure that I could do this with all of the host club members; in fact, I was pretty sure I could even find something I liked in Kyoya, though he was still suspect in my mind, especially since overhearing what the twins had said at the supermarket.

"What the hell?" I said, surprised because there was a large truck outside of Mom's house and a nurse walking up the steps and into the house, flanked by Jaime. I pressed open the door as quickly as I could and ran towards Jaime, "What is going on? Talk to me!" Jaime grabbed my shoulders and pushed me back, making sure that I didn't get into to door. Why? What the hell was going on?

"Katykay, listen to me. Your mom told me about this days ago. I only agreed because it is your mother, and she can be _very_ persuasive. Please, Katykay, calm down."

"I will not come down. I deserve to know what is going on. How dare either of you keep me out of it. What the hell is happening?" I heard Kurt, Kaoru, and Hikaru step behind me, all of them trying to ask what was going on. I ignored them. I knew exactly what was going on; I just didn't want to accept it. I knew what was going on since the Mom called me, "She's dying, isn't she?" I knew it. Jaime let go of my shoulders and tried to pull me into a hug, but I just pushed him away and leapt up the steps. I caught Kurt and the twins try and follow me, but Jaime held them back. For right now, that was a good thing. I ran into Mom's bedroom and fell on my knees next to her bed, grabbing her IV pinched hand.

"Mom. Why didn't you tell me?"


	22. Please Don't Take My Sunshine Away

A/N - Content Warning: This is going to have some serious mature content. I am sure that it is nothing that warrants a mature rating, and it is not sexual, but if you can't deal with emotional violence, especially to children, then skip the italicized portion.

Please review and let me know your thoughts, questions, or criticisms.

Please Don't Take My Sunshine Away

"It wouldn't 'ave done no good, darlin.'" Mom placed her hand on my head, stroking my hair down until she grabbed my chin, carefully lifting my face up to hers.

"Dammit, Mother! You don't get to decide that!" I slammed my fist down on the bed, pulling my face from her grasp and glaring at her piercing green eyes with my matching pair. All my life she had been deciding things under the pretense of protecting me. Newsflash: I didn't need protection from anything or anyone, "Every year we go through the same thing, and every time I happen to be out of the country, up to my neck in final exams, or a graduate thesis. I get a call from your doctor saying that you were rushed to the emergency room and that they did a bit of surgery or gave you a new batch of antibiotics, and you were fine."

"Kathrin, I know, but this time it's different. At my last appointment my docta said that even though I may look halfway past fifty on the outside, inside I'm as shriveled as an eighty nine year old. It's my time, Kathrin. I've been dyin' ev'ry day since that day. Half of my liver is shut down, my stomach's still gone, the only kidney I 'ave left ain't barely doin' nothin', and that doesn' compare to how bone weary and tired I am. I'm ready ta go. There's no poin' ta just getting' myself shot with _more_ drugs. It jus' ain't worth it."

Her breathing showed, I could tell by the hand that was clasped within mine that she had lost a lot of weight. She was my mother; I knew that she never let on how tired and in pain she really was. She could run a marathon while suffering from a kidney stone and would still be smiling and boisterous afterwards. To be honest, I knew that what she said was true. She should have died when I was eleven, and she should have died the next year, and the next, and the next…but she didn't, and I wasn't prepared for it to happen now.

"Mom. I can't accept that…"

"Darlin,' you 'ave to accept it. Now, you look exhausted, and I happen to know that there are a few people out there waitin' for you. I want to get some sleep, and you better too."

"But…"

"No 'buts' little lady. Don't worry; I'll be around tomorrow." Mom shook her hand from mine and rolled over on her side, stroking my cheek with the back of her fingers. I didn't want to leave her side, but her words were as good as a promise. She was too stubborn to die when she told me she would see me tomorrow. I smiled at her and nodded, walking out of the room and shutting the door.

"The twin's had to leave, and Jaime said that he was only in town for today because he had to head back up to Seattle. He told me to tell you that he had already talked with your mom, and that he would see you next time you came to the states." Kurt told me as I stepped around him and into the kitchen, opening the cupboard and pulling out a bottle of Southern Comfort. I didn't mind that Hikaru and Kaoru had left, but Jaime could have said goodbye to me himself. One would expect as much from a best friend, "Kate, don't you think that…"

"This bottle hasn't been opened since the night before that man killed Lily. Now that he's about to have successfully killed Mom, might as well have a drink for the old man." I poured myself a glass and sipped the hard liquor, ignoring the look that Kurt was giving me. The straight alcohol was sweet, but burned as it went down. I wasn't sure what was hurting me more, the fact that my mother was dying or the fact that I completely understood the rationality of what was going on and couldn't tell her to not give up.

"Kate, I heard what went on in there. Have faith in your Mom's decision."

"Faith? What the _hell_ is faith? I lost any faith I had a long time ago. She has made up her mind that she is going to die; I can't do anything again, just like with Lily. I can't save anyone." I downed the rest of the glass and reached towards the bottle to poor some more when a heavy hand grasped my wrist and squeezed, shaking the bottle from my grasp so that it fell over on the counter.

"Look at me, Kate." Kurt growled from behind me, turning me around to face him. I avoided his eyes. There was nothing he could do, nothing I could do. It was pointless to fight it. Meaningless.

"Look. At. Me." He forcefully grabbed my chin and pulled it towards him, shaking my head slightly so that I wouldn't avoid his eyes, "If everything you've told me about her is true, it means that she's taking initiative of her own fate and going out with dignity and pride. Now maybe they don't pride that in American culture. Maybe you all would rather fight using any means necessary to scrape any life, even a life of poor quality, out of your decaying bodies, but I would rather see my loved one go out with honor and acceptance of death than fear of it, on their own terms. Wouldn't you?"

In Japanese history there was an ideal called bushido and a part of that was seppuku, ritual suicide. In my understanding, a samurai would take his own life instead of falling at the hands of an enemy in order to preserve his, and by extension his lord's, dignity and honor. Though the tradition wasn't practiced anymore, the idea was still prevalent in the culture, especially where death was concerned. So, Kurt was viewing my mother as the honorable samurai not giving into her sickness' hands.

I knew what he said was exactly what my mother was thinking, but was that what I really had a problem with? I wanted my mom to be at peace, but I wanted something else too. I just…fucking hated it when everything was so damn confusing! You would think that God would give someone like me a break, but no, no breaks for me.

"I can rationalize everything you just said. I can even go so far as say that if she dies it would be better than having her suffer, but I can't accept it. I can't accept…I dunno what I can't accept about it, I just can't accept it."

"Kate!" Kurt panicked when I fell to my knees and then back onto the floor, my back hitting against the dishwasher rather harshly. I could feel him wrap his arms around me, pulling me into his lap and cradling me in his arms as if I were a little girl. Before I knew it my cheeks were wet, my tears squeezing between the almost nonexistent gap between his chest and my cheek, my hands grabbing him around the neck, my body weeping with me.

"I'm so scared." This was raw emotion that I was letting out, but it didn't feel comfortable. I wanted to take back my actions, my tears, my words, but I couldn't stop clutching onto him and completely exposing myself.

"Kathrin, it's okay to feel afraid. It's okay to feel confused, and it's okay to feel helpless. Everything will turn out the way it is supposed to." Kurt's voice was soothing. Did I believe his words? No. It was too emotional for me, too attached to the situation. I didn't want to _feel_ anything, especially fear, confusion, and helplessness.

"It's not supposed to happen this way. I've prepared myself for it so long that I can't accept it. I've told myself that it would be one more year, one more year, one more year. Now that that year is over I can't face it." I nuzzled my nose into him, his chest muffling my words as I choked them out through the tears. What was it I couldn't face? I was suffering because there was a wall placed between my heart and my head. I understood all of this, everything Kurt and Mom had said, and I could rationalize it and keep my distance. Yet, something inside of me didn't want to accept death because it meant that something else was being taken away from me, and I could do nothing to stop it. I was crying now because those two ideas were in competition with one another, and I wanted to choke the life out of the last one. Too emotional, too attached.

"Kathrin. You don't have to face it alone."

IIIII

"_Come here you little bitch!" He screamed at me as I tried to run from him, but he caught me. He caught me by the wrist, wrenching it in his hand that was so much larger and more powerful than mine._

"_Mommy! Mommy!" I screamed towards Mom. She was bleeding, laying in the kitchen, not moving. He slammed his hand over my face to shut me up. I did what I could do; I bit his hand and ran back inside._

"_Katie, over here!" Lily whispered to me from somewhere. Slowly the coat closet door opened and I saw Lily's small arm peek out, waving towards where I was standing. Without even thinking I opened the door and squeezed myself inside and, before I knew it, Lily had grabbed me around the middle and buried her face in my chest. I could feel her salty tears through my shirt, "I'm scared Katie. Why's Daddy doing this? Help me." Her little voice cried into me. I had to protect her. I couldn't protect Mom. I looked down at where his knife had bit me too, down on the wrist. It hurt, but it didn't matter as I began stroking Lily's head, my blood mixing in with her blond hair._

"_There you are, both of you. Nice work, bitch." He smiled as he opened the closet and grabbed both Lily and me by the hair, dragging the two of us out. I struggled, smacking the hand that was latched onto Lily's hair. Maybe if I could hit it enough times he would let go of her, and she could run away._

"_Daddy! What's wrong? Why are you doing this? Daddy!" Lily screamed as the man got us both outside. I stopped hitting him for a moment, my eyes transfixed on his face. He wasn't Daddy anymore. He was a monster. I tried to start struggling again when I felt my face smash into the water of the pool. It felt like a thousand needles were stabbing me all over. I heard Lily scream beside me. No! I wanted to scream. Don't swallow the water! I wanted to tell her, but if I opened my mouth then I would suck in the cold liquid too. I tried to struggle, but I could feel the man's hand firmly on the back of my neck. I had seen our cat do that to her kittens when they needed a bath. This was different though._

"_Katwie" No Lily! Don't talk underneath the water. I heard her call my name and I looked over, seeing her eyes plead with me for help. All I could do was fling my hand out to grab hers and squeeze. She grasped mine back, but only for a second. Then I felt her grip slacken, so I screamed and kicked. It didn't matter now, all I needed to do was get away so that I could get her out. Mom had taught me CPR when I was ten, I knew what to do. If only I could get away. If only I could get out of his hands I could save her, but it was getting harder to move and my chest hurt. Mommy! Mommy it hurts!_

"Kate. Aw, hell. Kate!" I was shaken awake by Kurt. I didn't even remember getting in bed at all. I just remembered sitting on the floor in his arms. I was still in his arms, my head on his arm and the rest of my body falling between his legs. His eyes were bloodshot, as if he had stayed up all night watching over me. I could feel fresh tears start running down my face. Fuck this. I really thought I had cried out half my body weight in water by this point.

I sat up and wiped the trace of water from my face, turning around and forcing a smile, "I'm fine. Just a bad dream."

"Kate. Don't lie to me." Kurt had gotten up and turned me to face him, the same way he did the night before. I turned and walked away from him, going towards the drawers and pulling out a pair of socks, heading back to the bed to put them on.

"Do you know if Mom is up?"

"Kate."

"Would you mind running to the grocery store to pick up a few things for breakfast? Mom's keys should be on the table by the door. You remember how to get there right?"

"Kathrin Joy Ame…"

"We only have bread in the house for breakfast. Man cannot live by carbohydrates alone, complex or otherwise." I shook my finger at him. Kurt glared at me for a few seconds before grabbing his wallet and walking out the door. I heard the keys scrape the table out in the hall and the outside door open. With a sigh I hung my head between my knees, placing my head in my hands. Heaving another gigantic sigh I stood up and walked to Mom's room and knocked on the road.

"Well it's about time, Kathrin." I couldn't help but feel relieved when I heard her voice and saw her face as I opened the door. She didn't look good. Her normal pink skin was tinted gray, and her eyes didn't seem to focus well enough on me, cloudy as they were, "Darlin' you look like you slept on a pincushion all night. I thought that Jap was gonna take care of my lil girl. He promised me so early this morning."

"You talked to Kurt this morning?" I moved a chair over by her bed and sat in it. She reached out and set her hand on top of mine, stroking it with her fingers.

"I only tol' him 'e needed to watch o'er my lil, Kathrin, and that if you two are sleepin' together that he should make an honest woman out uh ya. Even in the afterlife I ain't gonna be ready for a grandchil' out uh wedlock."

"Mom!" I turned my face, trying to hide a blush. She closed one of her eyes, leaving the other one open with the eyebrow lifted. It was her 'I caught someun in the cookie jar again, didn't I?' look, and I never liked it, even now.

"Now, be honest with your momma. You 'ad one of those nasty dreams last night, about your father? You 'ave one every time we see one another. Truly, it makes me a bit depressed." Mom took her hand off of mine and crossed her arms in front of her chest, breaking eye contact with my face, raising her nose to the ceiling as if she were a Parisian walking her poodle.

"He's _not_ my father."

"Bull-crap. 'E's as much your father as 'e is my ex-husband." That was pretty much as close as my mother got to uttering a single curse word, but it carried its weight when she said it, "I went to that prison last week and talked to your father. Now don't you scowl at me like that, Kathrin. I needed to make peace with him. You need to do it too. Once you forgive him, you can start workin' on forgivin' yourself. Now I toll you not to scowl at me like that."

"Why should I forgive him?" There was no reason too. I just needed to live and let live. He was on death row; he wouldn't be alive much longer; he didn't deserve it.

"I let go years ago. This was jus; the last step for me so that I can move on with no anger in my heart and no regrets. Thas's all. Ya need to do it too. Y'are one of the most intelligent people that I know, but sometimes that just makes you more thick-headed. Dagnabit, can we get me off of these here machines; they are drivin' me crazy"

"Mom, they need the machines to monitor how you're doing. Stop being so stubborn."

"Kathrin, please, let me spend my last day with my daughter in peace, without the annoyin' beep beep beep soundin' off like a ticking clock. Clock's already tickin,' and I don' need no darn reminder." She gave me the 'cookie-jar' look again, so I got up and turned off the machines. I could immediately tell that the machine was helping her do more than stay away. He breathing slowed, and at every exhale there was a small wheeze. Granted there had always been a wheeze because she had grown up in the south, but this was different.

"Darlin', do y'all remember the day ya came home from school so frustrated because ya couldn't use a semicolon." I chuckled as I sat back down. I did remember that day. It was in middle school, probably when I was about thirteen or fourteen, and my teacher had spent the entire afternoon re-teaching the class grammar because no one knew the correct way to use a comma or a semicolon.

"I was heartbroken because I loved English so much, and I had always been taught that you put commas when you breathe."

"But you had never experienced a semicolon in anythin' other than the book you'd read."

"And you said, 'Kathrin, just think of it this way. A semicolon is as strong as a period, but it never signifies the end, only a new beginning. Like the calm before the storm, or the breath before a sigh. Then you carried the metaphor too far."

"We'll, I'm your mother, ain't I? I 'ave to teach you life principles and it's never easy to just sit a chil' down and tell them the ways of the world. It stuck though, didn't it."

Of course it stuck. I'm a linguist now, you can't just forget everything you learn about semicolons when your career goal is based on language. I remembered what she said to me then. She said 'you can have semicolon joys, semicolon fears, and even semicolon blues, but all those things just lead up to a finish because there is no end to life's semicolons, just like there isn't an end to life's beginnings. You may put a period on the end, but that just means you're ready to start another sentence'

"I didn't understand that then." I sighed, brushing a strand of blondish gray hair out of her sweat laden face.

"Do ya now, Kathrin?"

"I…I don't know." The truth is that I did. It was the same idea as the metaphor of life being a book and all the chapters' different parts. You might end the chapter, but the book keeps going until there is nothing more to write, until death took you away.

"Well, I'm sure you'll figure it out someday. I want you to promise me two things, Kathrin. Hush-up and listen while I'm talkin' to you," She uttered her preemptive strike at my interruptions. I never liked her promises. They were difficult to follow through with and always taught some profound lesson. It was more tiring than fulfilling.

"Alright. But only those two, you got it?" I pointed my finger at her, making her smile as she reached next to her on the bed and pulled out what looked like a CD or DVD. I tilted my head a bit and narrowed my eyes. Mom was horrible with technology, so I wasn't sure whether to be frightened or excited as I took the disk in my hand.

"I wan' ya ta play this at my funeral. It's a movie I had the computer guy next-door make for me. Don't watch it beforehand. The next one is that I wan' ya to call your Father. I gave your man the phone numbuh of the prison so that ya don' tear it up or anything.' If ya don' call 'im I promise to haunt you until ya do." Mom reached out a shaking hand and dotted me on the nose with one of her fingers. It was cold, almost like ice. I nodded. I wasn't going to promise out loud, and by her smile she seemed to think I was good for my word. I usually was, but calling that monster was not on my top ten list of things to do, "Kathrin, come up here with your momma for a little bit. I wanna hear ya sing our song. Ya still remember it, don' ya?"

"How could I forget?" I faked a smile as I climbed into bed with her and laid my head on her chest. It was even easier to feel how frail she had become when I was holding onto her. Her heart was barely pumping, and I could hear gurgling in her lungs. No! It was too soon.

"Well, get on with it then." I felt her weakly kiss the top of my head, and I forced back tears. It's nearly impossible to sing when you're crying.

"'You are my sunshine, my only sunshine. You make me happy when skies are gray. You'll never know, dear, how much I love you. Please don't take my sunshine away." The tears started now, and I heard a breath catch in Mom's throat. I wanted to look up at her face, but as soon as I tried I felt her grasp around me tighten.

"Kathrin. I love you so much, lil girl. I am so proud of you." I clutched onto her tighter, my hands creating star-shaped wrinkles in the fabric of her nightdress, as the dam holding back my tears collapsed.

"You'll," _beat beat beat_ "never know, dear," _beat….beat….beat…_"how much I" _beat…beat…_"love you" _beat_…."please don't take my sunshine" _beat…_ "away." Silence. I looked over at the heart meter, the straight line glaring back at me viciously, I buried my head into her, trying to find any warmth that I could "I love you, Mommy."

And she was gone.


	23. Our Job is to Make Every Girl Happy

Our Responsibility is to Make Every Girl Happy

It was all too sudden. I had barely been home for more than thirty-six hours, and Mom was already gone. Right after that everything just seemed to move without me really paying attention, just like one of those dreams where you're both an actor in the dream as well as some omniscient being who is watching the entire scene unfold. I don't know what I would have done without Kurt. Even now he was off at the mortuary setting up a date for the funeral while we would still be in town. He was off doing the things that I should be doing. Instead, I was lying in the middle of the living room on the floor, staring up at the ceiling fan. I wasn't wallowing in self pity. Mom was gone, and she was most assuredly in that heaven that she always talked about with the Jesus who she could see so clearly, but who I really could rationalize into my own existence, let alone my heart.

Mom wanted to be cremated and mixed into the soil of her rose garden. As much as I understood the sentimentality of it, I didn't really like the idea of having to till my mom into the soil in the backyard. At least I was finally able to shut off the water works and shut of my emotions for a little while. I'm not heartless; I just don't like the liability of having a heart that was too fleshy. I could accept her actual death more than I could accept her dying. Really I am just selfish. I couldn't protect her while she was alive, and now that she was dead there was no reason to dwell on it. Maybe that makes me insensitive. Maybe it makes me a horrible person.

Hell, who am I kidding? I feel tore up from the floor up, pardon the expression. It was just easier to be cynical and apathetic about it, force a smile and keep on moving. That's who I was. That emotional me of the past day was a me that rarely came up, and I didn't like her so much. She was weak. She couldn't do anything but wail and get confused over what her heart said and what her head said. Now me, the me that is around ninety-eight percent of the time knew that her allegiance lay with the mind. The tangible and proven logic of life. The part that says a semicolon is just a punctuation point that links two independent clauses without the need of a coordinating conjunction. Mom, well, she was the heart, the part that had to make everything in life matter in some profound way. I missed her already, so much I missed her. Part of the reason I sent Kurt to do everything was because I needed to compartmentalize everything that had happened.

_Tell me that you're alright_

_Yeah everything is alright_

Who was calling my phone? Nobody had this number, and sure has hell no one was going to pay international roaming rates for calling me during the daytime. Then again, there were a few people I know who could afford the call as if they bought the calling card from the 99cent store.

By the way, I was going to have to smack Kurt for choosing this song for my ringtone. It was bad taste then, even worse taste now.

_Oh please tell me that you're alright_

_Yeah everything is alri…_

"Kyoya? What are you doing calling my phone? It's only nine in the morning there. Shouldn't you be asl…?"

"Ame-san! I'm so sorry. When you come back I'll let you hold Usa-chan and get you your favorite cake!"

"Honey?" Why was Honey called me from Kyoya's phone? Why was he calling me at all? Why did he already know about what had happened only just this morning?

"Miss Amendier, you may be wondering why we've called. Currently we are on speaker phone. I put a notification trace on all death certificates filed in San Diego during this week, when I saw that your Mother had passed we decided to call. Well, Haruhi said we should call." Kyoya had put a ping on…death certificates? There was no end to his evilness or the lengths that he would go to in order to invade someone's privacy.

"Kyoya-sempai, that's not entirely the truth," Haruhi's voice rebuked the older teen over the phone, earning somewhat of a chuckle from the Shadow King, "Are you okay Kate-sensei? Hisugawa-sensei called my house early this morning to tell us what happened. I'm sorry. Losing your Mom is one of the worst feelings in the world."

"Thank you, Haruhi. That means a lot coming from you." How could it not mean a lot? Her Mother had died ten years ago. To be honest, it wasn't much different since mine should have died fifteen years ago. I appreciated the way her voice conveyed her compassion. It wasn't very different from her normal tone, though you could tell that there was such sincerity behind it. That was Haruhi though, I guess.

"Miss Amendier. My condolences go to you as well."

"Thank you, Kyoya. Honey as well. I'll be sure to take up your offer about the cake once I get back to Japan." I heard Honey verbally smile, a small giggle escaping his lips. It was nice to talk to them, to hear the voices of the people who had come to matter so much to me. For a moment I forgot about mortality and emptiness. Maybe it was speaking Japanese, the language that felt far more familiar to me than my own, especially after spending so much time speaking it. I didn't really understand why it felt so good to hear their voices, even Kyoya's. Maybe it all goes back to the fact that I had been expecting this for so long, and now that it had happened I wanted it to just be done with.

"Amendier. Kishi Kaisei." Mori's deep voice interrupted my thoughts. He had said Kishi Kaisei. Literally it meant 'wake from death into life' or 'resuscitation,' but it was used more as an idiom to mean 'revival from a poor situation'.

"Thank you, Mori." It was very stoic of him to use an idiom, a spiritual proverb if you will. I guess that that is why people love Mori, because when he did say something he meant it, "You guys have no idea what it means to me that you called me. Is it just the four of you there?" I thought for sure that the twins should have been back in Japan by now, not to mention I couldn't really believe that Tamaki wasn't wherever the rest of his club was.

"Tama-chan's not ther…" Honey was interrupted by Haruhi and Mori saying "Honey-sempai!" and "Mitsukuni" at the same time. It was easy enough to finish Honey's thoughts. Tamaki is not there. He probably meant to say 'here' instead of 'there.' He didn't have a great track record for linguistic errors, like saying hellfish shunting instead of shellfish hunting.

"Tamaki's not here right now, but I assure you that you will hear from him soon." Kyoya's silky smooth voice covered over my thoughts. Now I _was_ suspicious, "At any rate, we should let you get back to grieving in peace."

I heard someone, most likely Haruhi, grumble "It's not going to be peaceful for very long" in the background as all of them said their goodbyes. I hung up the phone with a mix of pleasure at meaning so much to them that they would stalk death certificates and confusion at Honey's quick shut-down and Haruhi's grumble. Haruhi grumbled about a lot of things when it came to these boys, and I couldn't really blame her, but it made me wary. Tamaki always took advantage of the opportunity to be with Haruhi and the rest of the Host club. Even in Karuizawa he had tracked her down.

"Ow. Headache." All of this thinking was giving me a headache. I didn't need this right now. I got up and moved into the kitchen, pulling open the medicine drawer, shaking my head when I saw how full it was. Liver medicine. Back medicine. Kidney medicine. Heart medicine. The list would go on and on if there actually was a list. I sighed as I grabbed the Costco-sized Advil bottle and popped four of them. What? It was a massive headache.

_Ding dong_

"Who the hell?" No one was supposed to be coming over. Mom didn't have many friends because she couldn't go out anywhere, but I had called the two women whom she had in her phonebook to let them know. It being summer they were on vacation with their families and told me that they would pay their respects at her gravesite when they returned. Besides, I wouldn't know who to invite to a funeral until Kurt came back with her will. Yes, I sent Kurt to deal with that too. I just wanted to stay as distant from everything as possible.

_Ding dong, ding dong, ding dong_.

"Hold on a second! I'm coming. I'm coming." I downed the rest of the water in the cup and walked towards the front door. When I opened the door, I fought the urge to shut the door.

"Ame-sempai!"

"Tamaki?" He leapt into the room and pulled me into a hug, my face squished into his chest and my arms flailing. So that was what Kyoya meant when he said _Tamaki's not here now, but I assure you that you will hear from him soon_. Damn rat-bastard.

"Haruhi would have come if she had a passport. She was worried about you," He pulled himself away from me and moved back to the door, grabbing his bags and moving back into the room, "So I decided that I would come instead!" He dropped his bags and brandished his hands in the air dramatically, giving me a priceless smile as he took my hand and looked at me with those violet-blue eyes, "It is a remorseful time for you, Ame-sempai, and I am incredibly sorry for your loss. It's hard to lose someone who you love so much, and sorry doesn't do the sadness much justice, does it?" There were the usually Host club king tears pouring down his face for me. It was hard to think of those tears as sincere since they were shed so much and in the most normal moments of life, but I guess that's what made him the king.

"It's okay. I don't know if you can understand this, but my mother was sick for a very long time. It came to a point where even twenty-four hour care wasn't enough to stop her pain. In the end it was really her decision, not mine. I couldn't accept her choice, but I understand why she chose it. It was logical." I moved back to where I was laying on the floor before and lay down again, "There's a spare room upstairs with three beds the previous owner left. It hasn't been lived in since my Mom moved in, so there may be dust, but I'll clean it up and make the bed later if you don't mind sleeping in there. I don't have any tea in the house but there are probably sodas and a pitcher of water in the fridge. I'm planning on making dinner when Kurt get's back."

"You are quite the talented hostess, Ame-sempai. I've never been to America before, my father used to tell me about it here when he would come visit my Mother and me in France." I heard Tamaki's voice drift behind me and upstairs. I could hear the clop of his footsteps above me, then a loud thump as he set his luggage down, the footsteps beginning again. Closing my eyes I tried to picture my mother's face. I missed her, but the other day was probably the first time I had seen her in over a year. Before that I was in Europe for a year. Before that I was writing a master's thesis. Before that I was away at college. It was hard to explain exactly how I felt without feeling like a completely apathetic psychopath.

"You came here because Haruhi was worried about me?" I asked when Tamaki sat next to me, wrapping his arms around his legs as he curled them up to his chest, setting his chin on his knee, his eyes wide.

"We all were worried about you. You were surprised when you got the call from your mother, and I know what that face looks like."

"What face?" I had forgotten that Tamaki was in the room when Mom had called me, when I had let those few tears drop from my face. I had known all of this was going to happen, even then.

"The face that people make when they knew they were going to lose someone precious to them. The face where they knew that they were never going to see someone they loved again, and they couldn't do anything about it and knew that it was something that needed to happen for the person they treasured to be relieved of their pain." Where were these words coming from? How could he see through me? There were so many moments like these between the two of us; they almost equaled the moments where he was being insanely idiotic and flirtatious. Tamaki was a surprising person.

"How did you…"

"Sounds like someone's home." Tamaki looked up from where he was sitting and at the door. I sat up too. It was about time Kurt was home. I had had enough surprises for one day. Mom dying, Tamaki arriving; it's been a long ass day.

Shit. It just got longer.

"Kate-sempai!"

"Look who I found roaming the streets like two stray cats." Kurt alleged as he opened the door, the twins running towards me and grabbing me on opposite sides, rubbing my head with theirs.

"What are you two doing here again?" I grumbled, trying to ignore the "oh you poor dear" coming from their mouths. I looked up to Kurt in order to give him a "help me" look, but then I saw how bone tired he looked. He had spend all last night watching me sleep after I had my breakdown, and then he had been doing everything for me today that he could do. Poor man.

"Our mother was delayed and once Kyoya-sempai told us about what happened we decided to come back." One of them said, most likely Kaoru.

"And we knew that Tono was going to be here, though he was supposed to be here before anything happened to your mom." The one who was most likely Kaoru said, both of them sitting next to Tamaki, mirroring his position.

"Why are you all doing this for me? It doesn't make sense." What didn't make sense was how relieved I was that they were here. Tamaki, Hikaru, and Kaoru, despite how unbelievably aggravated they could make me, were brilliant and kindhearted boys.

"You're family, Kate-sempai, like the big sister that we've never had." I was pretty sure it was Hikaru, especially since his voice was a bit lower than the other twin.

"We know that you would do anything you could for us, and we would do anything for you." Kaoru echoed. I suddenly remembered our conversation about the carriage. If you thought about it that way, them being here was just another way our lives were intermingling inside of the carriage.

"Besides, Ame-sempai, It's the responsibility of the Ouran Host Club to make every girl happy," I followed his face as he proudly stood, running his hands through his feathery blond hair and looking off into the far distance, "Nothing can every replace your mother, but you can take comfort in the fact that you aren't alone, like I have." Tamaki nodded at me and left, moving towards the kitchen before collapsing.

"The boss must be tired." Both of the twins said together, looking at one another and shrugging. Well, that was incredibly sudden. Kurt moved over to Tamaki and lifted him up of the floor. It was a good thing Kurt was strong and he was a giant compared to more Japanese men, other than Mori who was a tree even compared to Kurt. He set Tamaki gently on the couch, and the twins covered him with a blanket, the two of them shaking their heads.

"I thought you two would take this as an opportunity to pounce on him or do something devilish to him." I crossed my arms and glared at the two miscreants.

"Usually we would, but today is different." Kaoru crossed his arms and glared back at me, clearly mocking me and obviously offended.

"We care about Tono a lot, and he probably found today incredibly difficult. Not to cover over anything you're feeling, but the loss of anyone losing their mother hurts him more than normal." Hikaru said bluntly, standing up and leaning on his brother, giving me a look of both sadness and contemplation, both things a rarity in Hikaru.

I looked over at the napping Host king and smiled. Despite everything I was feeling or not feeling, I felt like a weight had been lifted off of my shoulders for the moment. Mom was gone, nothing was going to change that, but what Tamaki had said was true. I had people who cared about me and weren't going to leave me. Mom wouldn't have wanted me to show an epic display of grief for her, she would want me to move on. I knew that. It was going to be difficult, but with all of these wonderful people around me it would be okay.

"Well, I guess it's convenient that the old owners left three beds upstairs. I think that I have three sets of twin sheets from when I went to college." I went to the linen cottage, my steps a bit lighter as I walked. That was a good sign. I did find three sheets. Now it seemed to have been a good thing that I was lazy in college and would rather buy a third set of sheets rather than wash my soiled ones.

"Hikaru, Kaoru, would you mind waiting down here while Kate and I make the beds? I think there is a stew pot in the fridge, can you guys get it on the stove so that we can eat soon. It'll be good for everyone to get something to eat." Kurt nodded towards the twins who both saluted him and ran off to the kitchen. I wasn't entirely sure I trusted those two in the kitchen, but burnt food was better than no food. I followed Kurt up the steps, holding the sheets compressed between my arms.

"It's not horrible in here, but definitely not five star hotel standards." I opened the window and grabbed one of the quilts off of the three beds, shaking it outside to get all of the dust out of it while Kurt grabbed the vacuumed. We continued cleaning the room in silence until it was pretty much dust free. I grabbed one set of sheets and began making a bed, and Kurt did the same with another bed.

"So, what happened today?" I broke the silence as I moved to the third bed at the same time Kurt did, the both of us looking at one another as we attached the bottom sheet snuggly around the corners of the bed and I secured the second sheet by tucking it under the bed.

"You're Mother will be cremated and ready to come home tomorrow, so we will have to go pick her up from the mortuary. In her will she said that she only wanted a headstone to go in the cemetery next to where you both buried your sister, she said to put her favorite quote on it as an epitaph." Kurt secured the quilt over the bed and sat down on it. It was an ugly pink flowered quilt that Jaime gave me as a gag gift when I went to college, knowing full well that I hated pink with the fiery passion of a malfunctioning incinerator.

"Her favorite quote is one by Leonardo daVinci. 'As a well spent day brings happy sleep, so a life well spent brings happy death.'" I felt Kurt wrap his arm around me and pull me to himself. He was so warm and so strong. This was where I needed to be, right here in his arms. Mom knew that too, wherever she was.

"It's appropriate." Kurt kissed the top of my head and tightened his grip on me a little bit, "Your mom's will also said that everything was yours, the house and everything in it. Also, it said that she didn't want a funeral at all, that giving you the DVD was a test of will power and that you should watch it when you felt ready." I chuckled into his chest, putting my arms around him and squeezing him.

"Let's go back to Japan as soon as we can. I think Mom would want me to get back to my life. Besides, the break is almost over, and I need to do some stuff for the Choir club before school officially starts. Plus, we need to get those students back to their parents." I unhooked myself from his grasp and pulled myself up from the bed, smoothing over the space on the quilt I had just vacated, "Tamaki's Mother will be worried about him. If this is how he reacts whenever he leaves her in Japan then…"

"My Mother isn't in Japan." I swirled around from my straightening as Tamaki came into the room, the blanket the twins had given him around his shoulders.

"I'll let you two talk. Someone should go make sure those twins don't burn the kitchen down." Kurt got up and left while Tamaki came over to me and sat down on the spot Kurt had just vacated. Without having to be asked I sat down.

"What do you mean? I thought for sure that you just missed her, that she had been sick or something. The way you were talking about all of this earlier made it seem like you had some experience with loss, either that or you're a good shrink." I tried to make him laugh with my small joke, but he only smiled. Damn, it was kind of depressing to see him act like this, act so unlike his normal princely self.

"I know how you feel because I lost my mother a few years ago. I grew up with her in France because I am my father's illegitimate son, so my paternal Grandmother doesn't like me. All of the details make for a long story, but because the Suoh family needed a successor, my Grandmother had no choice than to figure out a way for me to come to Japan. Mom had always been sick, for as long as I could remember, and I would play the piano for her to make her smile, but my Grandmother had other plans and said that the Suoh family would pay for my Mom's health expenses if I came to live in Japan and never saw my mother again."

"Tamaki. That's awful. I'm sorry, I didn't know…"

"Don't worry Ame-sempai. It was my decision. I want to see her; it's true, but I have an obligation to protect her and keep her healthy, which is what I am doing now. Besides, now I have the Host club and Haruhi around. They are family, and Ame-sempai," Tamaki grabbed my hand softly, clasping it in between his two warm hands and looking at me from the side, "You're family too." I nodded my understanding and was about to say something back when Kaoru yelled from downstairs that the food was finished, "Ame-sempai?"

"I think that I'm going to stay up here for a little while. You guys eat and call me down when you want to watch Mom's funeral DVD. You don't have to watch it with me, but I would like it if you shared the moment with me." I curled my lips into as much of a smile as I could muster as Tamaki smiled and ran downstairs yelling, "You shady twins better not put any chrysanthemum in my stew pot!"

Such a quick turnaround. Dead serious then spastic, but that was Tamaki. I couldn't have even hazarded a guess about his family background, but now that I knew the only thought that could fill my mind was that one thing Kurt had told me when we were in the car back after we had just met: _Someone once said that suffering was like a gas and humans were like tubes, no matter how big the tube or how much gas, the gas always would fill it up equally. It doesn't matter what we've been through in life, each human being has experiences pain in the same way._ I told him then that I didn't believe it, but the compassion I wanted to extend to Tamaki outweighed any sort of grief that I felt. As much as I had now set off my emotions from this moment, I couldn't be completely apathetic to that sixteen year old boy. Maybe because, even though he was a teenager, he was still a boy at heart, and it was such a pure heart.

I leaned back on the bed and closed my eyes, drifting off somewhere I didn't have to think about anything.

IIIII

_You say that my love is all you need to see you through _

_But I know these words are not quite true_

_(So) here is the path you're looking for, an open door_

_Leading to worlds you long to explore_

I woke up to the DVD that had to have been playing all night long on a repeat cycle. I yawned and tried to stretch my arms but they were weighed down by something. Tamaki and Kurt. I grinned despite myself as I slowly slipped my arms from underneath them, both of their heads falling softly on my lap. Looking at the screen, memories flashed by for the second time outside of their actual memory making. Pictures of Lily, Mom, and me baking cookies and then a picture of me completely covered in flour because I accidently tipped over the bowl. They were good memories.

_Go if you must move on alone_

_I'm gonna make it on my own_

I felt a short pain shoot up my leg, so I looked down. Against each knee lay an orange head tilted in a symmetrical direction with the other one, a set of arms wrapped around each leg. Hikaru and Kaoru were there too. All of us were sitting in one big heap on the couch, my memories flashing upon the screen.

_Kiss me good-bye, love's memory _

_Follow your heart and find your destiny_

_Won't shed a tear for love's mortality_

_For you put the dream in my reality_

This is exactly how Mom would want it. Small tears stung my eyes, ones that I hadn't shed last night because I was in front of people. I reached down and stroked Kurt's hair, kissing him on the head before moving to each of the teenagers and stroking their hair softly. They had endured so much because of me, and yet they stayed, sharing this will me as if they were brothers or sons. And I knew that, somewhere, Haruhi, Kyoya, Honey, and Mori were offering up their prayers to something out there on my behalf. Mom, you would be so proud of all of these people.

_As time goes by I know you'll see this of me_

_I loved you enough to let you go free_

_Go, I will give you wings to fly_

_Cast all your fears into the sky_

Pictures flashed upon the screen of me graduating from high school, packing and leaving for college, graduating college, working all night long on a master thesis, packing and leaving for Europe, and finally packing and leaving for Japan. In fact, this song, a song by Angela Aki, was one of my Mom's favorites when I had first started learning Japanese as a hobby towards the end of my junior year of my undergraduate days.

"Ame-sempai, did we sleep out here all night?" Tamaki yawned, as barely woke up before flopping back towards the other side of the couch and beginning to snore again.

"Come on, all of you, UP!" I yelled. Kurt sprang up quickly, overdoing it and falling off the couch and uttering a pained "ouch" as he tried to stand up. Obviously everyone was sore this morning, but not as sore as I was going to be since I turned into a human size pillow, "Alright, if you won't wake up when I say it, then I'll wake you up myself!" Hikaru and Kaoru had remained completely oblivious to all of the flopping and falling going on in the world of the living, so I decided to stand up.

_Kiss me good-bye, love's mystery_

_All of my life I'll hold you close to me_

"Kate-sempai, we're sleeping, please don't move around" Kaoru growled groggily, clutching onto my leg even tighter as I took a step forward, dragging the almost dead-weight of the twin with me.

"Yeah, these flannel pajamas are comfortable, but I can feel your leg stubble through them. You need to shave. Do it after you drag us to the plane though, okay?" Hikaru grumbled as he snuggled his face even further into my leg.

_Won't shed a tear for love's mortality_

_For you put the dream in my reality_

"Ha. Haha. HAHAHAHAHAHA!" I doubled over, falling backwards onto the floor. I dunno why but the position the twins were in made me laugh for the first time in what seemed like an eternity. Kurt joined in the laughing as he stood up and stretched his back, cracking each vertebra in the most disgusting fashion possible. The twins had finally woken up and let go of my legs, rubbed their eyes simultaneously and then grinned.

"Come on you guys, get packed," Kurt said as he turned off the DVD and began to shake Tamaki awake, "It's time to get back to Japan."

IIIII

Once everyone was awake (it took nearly an entire half canister of 'commoners coffee' to do so), and we had picked up my Mom at the mortuary and brought her home, we were all in a taxi on the way to the Suoh's private jet. I was looking out of the passenger's side window, my hand firmly clutched by Kurt's, his other hand stroking my hair. I was ready to go back to Japan, ready to start back up where I left off.

Mom would understand and she would want me to move on. Just like the song she had picked for her farewell DVD, it was time to move on and live life. She would have wanted that for me, and having Hikaru, Kaoru, Tamaki, and Kurt with me just reaffirmed that I could do this. I was still upset. She was my Mother, and I would never get her back, but because she was my Mother I couldn't stop my life. She wouldn't have wanted that. Granted she wouldn't want me to do all of this by attempting complete apathy, but hey, that was my coping mechanism. Either way, she would have wanted me to do this, to grab my ticket and get back on a plane to where I belonged for the moment, and that place was Japan.

Wait a second? Ticket…for a private jet? I looked down at my slip of paper with a hand written number on it as we boarded the modest plane. Who am I calling modest? It might not be a 747 but owning a private jet sure wasn't modest. Anyways, I walked to the seat that my ticket was pointing me to. On each side of the jet there was a row of three seats, a large wooden table between them. At least we could play cards or something. I set my purse down on the table as everyone else found their seats. Kurt smiled at me across from the table, Tamaki sitting down next to him.

Wait. Aw, fuck me sideways!

"Wait, why am I the one stuck in between these two devils? Shouldn't I be sitting with you two and these two be the ones sitting alone." I cried as Hikaru and Kaoru sat on either side of me, the two leaning their elbows on their table and setting their cheeks on their fists.

"We played a penalty game for the right to sit next to you." One of them, I think Hikaru though again I can't ever be sure, said from my left. I was sure it was Hikaru though because he said it rather bluntly.

"And what, pray tell, was this game" I asked, shifting my gaze towards Kurt who was pretending to ignore me and continuing to talk to Tamaki about whether certain Japanese prefectures soba noodles were better than others.

"We were the first ones to make you laugh." The two twins said together. So everything this morning was planned? No way in hell they could have know that that would make me laugh, let alone even happen. They slept their all night in order to make me laugh? While that was kind of sweet, it was also very devious and underhanded. Now I was going to have to spend the entire flight to Japan in between these idiotic foxes. Hells no!

"Kurt, Tamaki, a little help here?" Tamaki and Kurt both put their hands out and shook them at me. Yeah of course, sitting next to the twins was probably more of a house of horrors rather than a house of laughs.

"Kate, if they get on your nerves then just bang some heads," Kurt said very cavalierly as he brushed his hand at me, brushing me off. I cannot believe it. In my frustration I opened my purse and grabbed out some of my antibacterial hand cleaner and rubbed it on my hands, nearly rubbing them draw. Wait a second, that chemical smell. Ha. Hahahaha. Oh hell, it was worth a try, maybe it would freak them out a bit. Great idea, Kate.

"Naw. I'll just use the chloroform I carry around in my purse. Chloroform doesn't make as much of a mess and works one hundred percent of the time. Banging heads can lead to much more crying and blood, not to mention the work involved in rendering them unconscious. Too much effort and too much evidence." I poured a little bit more antibacterial soap onto my hands, and put my arms around the twins, making sure that they smelled the chemicals on my hands.

"Tono. We changed our minds! We forfeit, just get us out of here!"

Tamaki just shook his head, never taking his eyes off me. He approved. Who wouldn't? I looked from side to side, the twins amber eyes looking up at me with what, rare for them I am sure, was the emotion of fear, so I smirked demonically. What was it Tamaki said again? When in Rome do as the Roman's do? Well, that was the plan. Maybe the flight home wouldn't be so bad after all. Hell, at least I was smiling, and that was what was important, right Mom?

IIIII

A/N – well that is it for the adventures in America. Sorry for the three depressing chapters in a row. There isn't much to this story left, most likely only three or four more chapters at the most.

I'd like to give a shout out to KageNoNeko who has been an extremely faithful reviewer.

I hope that if any of you have comments, questions, or criticisms that you let me know in a review or a message. Hope you are all having a great summer.


	24. Why Does Everything Have to be so Compli

Disclaimer: I do not own Ouran, and I use some of the dialogue from the dubbed version of the show in this chapter and want to make sure that y'all know that I don't own it.

Why Does Everything Have To Be So Complicated!

"Kate, do you really think that eating three of those is good for you?" Kurt's eyes were wide as he watched my unwrap a hamburger and take a bite. I ignored him. We had only been back in Japan for a week, and it felt so good to be back. Kurt and I hadn't spent much time out of the house, both of us fighting jet lag in the beginning and then having no motivation to leave. The first night we were back he slept over twenty-four hours, probably catching up on all the sleep that he had missed while we were in the States. As soon as he woke up and relaxed by watching every season of the most annoying show in the world, South Park (even more annoying since it was on television so it was Japanese dubbed), he decided that we should go to the mall center's commoners' swap-meet thing, since today was the day before the second trimester of Ouran would begin. So now we were sitting at a McDonalds.

"I am hungry. Besides, I bought three burgers because they are tiny and on the Yen version of the dollar menu." Sticking out my tongue at him, I grabbed a few fries and dunked them into some ketchup before shoving them in my mouth.

"You forget that the calorie and fat content in one of those burgers is twice as much as two burgers you would make at home. Not to mention you are eating fries and one of those super sweet milkshake things. You're going to have a heart attack at forty if you keep this up."

"Psssshhhh. You only have arteries once, why not clog them?" I shrugged, taking another large bite out of my hamburger, making sure that I masticated it nice and slowly. Masticate is a good verb, so is pontificate, which was what Kurt was doing.

"You know, you should treat your body better."

"Are you saying there's something wrong with my body?" I raised one eyebrow up at him. He quickly shoved a chicken nugget into his mouth, looking down at the table as he did so. Yeah, that's right. I won this argument my friend. I opened up the second hamburger and began to much away at it while looking around the fast food restaurant. I stopped my gaze on a couple of people that looked rather familiar to me, narrowing my eyes. No freaking way! "Uh, Kurt, is that Haruhi and Kyoya?" I pointed towards the couple that I was watching, the two of them sitting together, Kyoya looking completely relaxed (actually like a teenager) and Haruhi sitting erect as if she was on guard for something.

"Hmn. Maybe they're on a date." Kurt shrugged and ate another nugget, keeping his eyes transfixed on the couple.

"Shut. Up! I thought she was dating Hikaru!" I panicked, about ready to get up and ask Haruhi what the hell she was doing. I know that being with a bunch of guys all the time could lead to a romantic relationship forming, but not with two different guys at the same time. And what about Tamaki! Tamaki was so sweet, innocent, and idiotic that if Haruhi was dating two guys his daddy-instincts would kick in, and he would go mad. Not to mention I still thought that Haruhi and Tamaki were going to end up together; it would be perfect if those two ended up together. If she was dating Kyoya, or Hikaru for that matter, it would ruin my perfect matchmaking prowess.

"Kate, it's obvious that Hikaru likes Haruhi. It's also pretty obvious that Kaoru likes Haruhi as well, but I am pretty sure that keeping his relationship with his brother intact is more important to him. Who is to say that Kyoya doesn't have a thing for her as well? Then there is Tamaki, but I am too confused about his idiocy that I just don't want to hazard a guess." Kurt waved his hands in dismissal when he reached the bit about Tamaki.

To be honest, Tamaki had grown in my esteem pretty quickly, especially since the conversation we had had about his mother back in the States. While he was a bit too much to handle, and a complete moron, he was sweet. Again, to be honest, he was like Kurt in a lot of ways, especially the way he made someone feel loved. Then again, all of the Host club members had the ability to do that. Perhaps it was sincere, perhaps it was an occupational hazard, but I believed that with them it may have been both, and may be why they are so good at winning the hearts of the girls at Ouran.

"Kate," Kurt woke me up from my little thought provoked trance, looking at me with his eyes. I knew what those eyes meant, and I didn't like it, "Let's follow them once they get up."

"Really? Again? Why do you enjoy stalking our students?" He shrugged as I scolded him through my teeth, crossing my arms and looking away so that he would know that I was _not_ interested in being a crazy stalker. The last time we did that I ended up giving a heart-filled lesson to Hikaru and then got sick as my payment. Not again, thank you.

"Can we at least move closer so we can hear their conversation?" Kurt threw up the puppy dog eyes. Now, he wasn't as good at it as Tamaki was, but my abounding love for him made him hard to resist in general. So, against my better judgment, I followed him as we picked up our food, threw away the garbage, and ended up sitting in the booth next to theirs. To my chagrin, I was sitting right behind Kyoya. Even though there was a planter between us, I didn't even want to be this close to him. I wanted to berate Kurt for making me do this, but doing that would probably alert Kyoya to the fact that we were right behind them. Knowing him he already knew this. I swear, he didn't have a soul.

"This food doesn't appeal to me in the slightest. No doubt you'll say that I'm callous for admitting it since you bought this tripe." Yeah, no soul. How dare he talk to Haruhi like this. How dare he make her pay for it? In my understanding his family basically owned Japan, why make a normal girl like Haruhi pay for it, especially since she already owed them money. He should take what she bought him off her Host club tab, which would be fair.

"There's an understanding between makers of food like this and those that eat it. Quality takes a backseat to convenience. Refinement isn't part of the equation. It's meant to be eaten quickly. Besides, there isn't anyone of consequence to witness my momentary lapse of manners." Why did everyone have to dis my fast food? Did everyone have something against a greasy hamburger that probably contained only three percent of actual meat?

"Hey, for the record, I'm saying it benefits me nothing to keep up appearances in a place like this, and that includes any special treatment I may give you here." Was he actually continuing this little demon spiel? Oh, and no one of consequence, oh we will see about that. Damn, if I was still teaching I would flunk him for this. I looked over at Kurt who was trying to stifle a laugh. I shook my head at him, grabbing a pen from my bag and writing "Stop laughing, he is being a jerkwad" and sliding the napkin and its message across the table, waiting as I saw him write a bit and shove the napkin back at me.

"It's amusing to me how him and Tamaki can be as close of friends as they are." I read. I looked up at Kurt and nodded. How were they friends? It was like Kyoya was the demon to Tamaki's angel, the Iago to Othello, the Sebastian to Ariel. How the hell did they complement each other?

"You're probably wondering how Tamaki and I complement each other so well." I cringed in my seat. He was fucking telepathic. Wonderful, just wonderful. "The answer is simple: I have something to gain. There is no better motivator than self interest. I have to look out for number one, you know." The dark and cold nature of his voice was frightening.

"Tamaki-sempai would be heartbroken if he heard you say that." Haruhi chimed in. What a brilliant girl. Poor Tamaki though. All he ever tried to do was make people happy, that included Kyoya. Granted Kyoya was the one who keeps the club running, but still, poor Tamaki.

"On the contrary, he's understood our arrangement from the very beginning. Same goes for all of them: Hikaru, Kaoru, Honey-sempai, Mori-sempai. The glue that holds the Host club together is our mutual egocentricity. It's the principle that drives the alliance between our families and insures each of our futures. Althogh Tamaki is a fool, and self sacrifice does come naturally to him, the point of this would be that we are very different creatures. Are you going to clean this up?" I heard Haruhi sigh (poor girl) as they both got up and walked away, thankfully walking the opposite direction.

Damn that rat-bastard. What was he talking about egocentricity for? Yeah, all of them were rather vain and somewhat egocentric, but they weren't so self obsessed that they didn't do anything for anyone else. Tamaki was a fool because he was an idiot, not because he liked to help people by sacrificing some of himself. Even Kyoya couldn't convince me that he hadn't done things to be nice, like fix my computer or let the Host club call me long distance on his cell phone after putting a trace on my mother's death certificate. Though it was easier to accept that he was a soulless Satan than a nice guy, I still thought that he was more one of those intrinsically evil people who fought for the side of good.

"Shoot. What Kyoya said just reminded me that I have a meeting with Kyoya's father, Yoshio, today. Would you mind leaving here early and stopping on our way home?"

"Yeah, I don't mind. What is it about anyways?" I stood up when Kurt did, sliding my arm through his as we exited the McDonalds to do what we came for, looking at the products expo.

"I can't believe I didn't tell you this earlier. I guess I figured that most everyone at Ouran knows everything about one another's business life, that I forgot you are just an ignorant American." He kissed me on the cheek. Yeah, way to make me not be angry at you for calling me ignorant. Then again, he was forgiven since anything pertaining to business made me squeamish.

"I'm a fast learner." He chuckled, kissing me again. Hehehe, I could keep this up.

"If you insist. For starters, my father's fortune, the Tanaka group, is in food service management. In fact, the refectory at Ouran is one of my father's business deals. Today I am signing off on a deal with the Ootori group for a lifetime commitment with the Tanaka group for managing the Café's in all of the Ootori hospitals. It's probably one of the biggest deals that my Father has made. The Tanaka group also trains personal chefs. Coincidently, the Haninozuka, Morinozuka, Suoh, and Hitachiin families all have personal chefs that trained with the Tanaka group."

"Oh what a tangled web we weave." I said, trying to be funny as I attempted processing the information. Everything was way too complicated in business. This was why I stuck to languages and grammar.

"It's more tangled than you could ever imagine."

"How so?"

"Well, let's take all the boys from the Host club, for example." We stopped at the elevator and got in, Kurt pausing his speech to let people out of the elevator so we could get in, "All of the members of the Host club should be, in a way, enemies based on the competition between their families. The Hitachiin family designs and supplies uniforms and other fashion merchandise. They do this for the Suoh group's schools, including the uniforms at Ouran Academy, the Ootori group's hospital staff, as well as the Morinozuka and Haninozuka family's dojo and training facilities Judo training outfits."

"Damn, those twins are rich bastards."

"And that is only the contracts within the Host club itself. There are many other families and groups, including my family, that make use of the Hitachiin designs. It doesn't stop there either. The Morinozuka and Haninozuka families provide protection through the men they train at their dojos. The Tanaka, Suoh, and Hitachiin families all have personal security details that come from the Morinozuka and Haninozuka training facilities, and that isn't including the one hundred men making up the Ootori family police force who also come from the same martial arts background. The Ootori group not only manages hospitals for the general public, but they are also the supplier of private doctors to all of the Host club members' families. Then there is the Suoh group. They have their hands in everything, sustaining all of the different families with their wealth and keen business management. The Chairman proves a friend to all of them, but any one of them, Hitachiin, Ootori, Morinozuka, Haninozuka, Tanaka, could all be squashed if the chairman's mother wanted to be incredibly shrewd in her dealings."

I began to rub my temples because my head was hurting too much. Who would have thought that all of those teenagers were so inexorably linked, not to mention how much competition there would be once they all group up to inherit their families fortunes. I'm glad I'm a Linguist and actually have no real monetary value.

"Kaoru and Hikaru are lucky because they have one another. They will be able to share their duties, and hopefully it doesn't drive them apart." Kurt started again, stopping in front of a vender and looking at a bunch of watches, "Honey and Mori have one another as well, so they will have no problem. Tamaki, on the other hand, may not inherit, so he may be spared all of it."

I picked up a small beaded bracelet from the table next to where Kurt was standing. That's right, Tamaki's grandmother didn't like him and, if what Kurt said was true, she would probably hold power of her grandson until the day she died. Poor Tamaki. Wait a second…

"What about Kyoya? If anyone is suited for this, it's him." He was such a Scrooge that I doubt he would have any problem running a company.

"Well, Kyoya won't get to run one of the companies. He's the third son, which means his eldest brother will inherit everything and his middle brother will be there to help the eldest. Kyoya may get placed in charge of a small company, but ultimately he won't be able to have much impact in the Ootori group's future. It's quite sad, actually, because his father expects even more out of him than his elder brothers." I stopped looking at the jewelry and looked up at Kurt. Could that really be true? Kyoya was evil, I would give him that, but if I theoretically had to choose anyone of the Host club to carry on my legacy, I would choose Kyoya regardless of age. Then again, I'd probably let them duke it out for who wants what position or make them share it equally. Then again, that could be the American in me.

"Are all Japanese families so harsh?" I asked, grabbing Kurt's hand as we started walking back to the elevator.

"Most are. Mine isn't, thankfully. Technically I am the oldest, but I never wanted the Tanaka group because of the scandal it would cause, considering I'm not my father's biological son and the fact that I wanted to become some type of scientist. Hotaru is the head of the company and will take over all of my father's responsibilities when he retires, but I consult for him once in a while because I am the only other male child. Ruuya though, she has her hands in the company. She keeps Hotaru grounded." I watched him chuckle, glad that he was able to do what he wanted to do with his own life, and glad that Ruuya was finding a way to break the glass ceiling in Japan. Right on girl!

"You went on to work for NASA then, right?"

"I was contracted right after I received my B.S. in Physics and Engineering. I got tired of working there and being so far from home, so I moved back here when a teaching position at Ouran opened up, and I've been here ever since." I enjoyed it when I met super smart people that decided to ultimately be teachers because passing on that knowledge was more important than making a name for yourself. My man had such integrity! "I've been so secure in my job that I haven't even gone back to get my masters. I probably won't. School never appealed to me."

"Wait a second. You don't have your Masters degree and you worked at NASA and have a job? I have a Masters and I wasn't able to find a job in the States and lost my job at Ouran. Sucks to be me." Kurt pulled me towards him, acting like he was going to comfort me by kissing the top of my head or something like that.

"Well, I didn't need a graduate degree to prove myself. I got in purely on talent." I glared up at him, now receiving the kiss on the head. Now it wasn't comforting. Now it was patronizing.

"Touché Hisugawa, Touché."

IIIII

Well, this was uncomfortable. Not only was I sitting in the home of one of my students, but I was sitting in the living room with two men who wouldn't look up at me or acknowledge my existence even though both Kurt and Mr. Ootori introduced me. I was still brooding over the fact that I was unemployed with a Masters and Kurt was Mr. Teacher of the Year. Not to mention he was out there signing those papers. Probably making his family gobs of money while I sat here feeling like I was behind a glass wall.

"Spare me my life!" I heard a very familiar kingly voice scream in the hall behind me as a door opened and closed, a slight breeze blowing by as I turned and saw a blurred Tamaki run past the opening. Seconds later a calm Kyoya walked through the door, his hands in his pockets and his eyeglasses glinting at the boy who had just run into the house as he followed him. They must be back from the Expo.

I looked around at the two dunces that were still ignoring me and had obviously not heard anything that had just happened. Follow and idiot and a demon, or stay here and stare into the abyss? It was one of those monumental life questions that measures your worth as a human being. To be, or not to be? I choose excitement!

"I'm going to use the facilities. It was nice meeting you gentlemen," I bowed myself out of the room, the two of them looking above what they were working on to nod at me. Thank God they wouldn't wonder where I was headed to. I saw a light on at the end of the hallway, and it was a long ass hallway. I'm with you Haruhi; damn these rich people.

"Don't kill me, Kyoya!" Tamaki gasped as I reached the end of the hallway, pressing myself against the wall and turning my neck so that I could see in the room without anyone noticing. I wanted to laugh at what I was seeing, but I also wanted to bang my head against the wall in confusion at what I was seeing. Tamaki was on the floor, pinned down by Kyoya. It looked like they were wrestling. Like Tamaki did with the twins a long time ago. Did Kyoya even know how to wrestle like a normal teenager?

"I'm not going to kill you; I'm going to destroy you." Kyoya said in his normal satanic voice as he grabbed Tamaki by the ankle when the blond teen managed to wiggle away. Tamaki was laughing incredibly hard as Kyoya tried to pull Tamaki towards him. It was like they were brothers. This was giving me the creeps.

"But Kyoya!" Puppy dog eyes. Kyoya stopped immediately after the puppy dog eyes and sat back on the floor. Tamaki sat up, breathing heavily before bursting out into laugher. I watched as a smile slowly (and I mean slowly) crept up Kyoya's face, culminating in a honest and sincere chuckle. I couldn't help but smile because I had never seen this come out of Kyoya. He looked happy, and there was no touch of sinister demon lord in his face, which was basically a miracle.

"Just promise me you won't do anything like that again." Kyoya fisted his hand and bopped Tamaki on the head before standing up and walking up stairs at the opposite side of the room, Tamaki quickly following him. I could hear that there was a conversation going on, so I decided to sneak into the room. Look, I was bored. I am not like Kurt and his gossipyness. I was going to make my presence known…eventually.

DAAAAMN! This bedroom was the size of my entire house. I was pretty sure it was. There was a gigantic flat screen television, a whole row of dressers, and a huge white couch. Damn, it was bigger than my house. I sat down on the couch and picked a book up off of the coffee table. _It's a Hermaphrodite: A Study of Androgyny built into Language._ What a horrible title! Hey, wait a second, this was my Thesis. How the hell? Uh, never mind about the title thing.

"Haruhi mentioned something that intrigued me today. She said that being a nice guy comes 'naturally' to me, as if I had personality traits that were similar to yours. I don't think I have that much of a capacity to be a moron." Kyoya said above me. I could hear his footsteps. It sounded like pacing. Was that something he did a lot, I wonder?

"I know, Kyoya, my generosity is wondrous to behold. I am so blessed and cursed by what God has gifted me with." Tamaki said passionately. I heard something flop onto a bed, and I figured that it was Tamaki since the pacing was still going on.

"Moron." True sentiment Kyoya. Tamaki was a moron, but a very cute moron.

"But you know, Kyoya, I know you better than anyone. You excel at everything you try. You could touch the sky if you wanted to. I guess that means that when it comes to being a nice guy, you can do that too." I heard the footsteps stop, and I heard the bed squeak a little bit, "My littler girl was right." I heard the bed squeak again, the pacing beginning afresh.

"Tamaki, how long are you going to refer to Haruhi as your daughter? Are you really that oblivious to your own emotions? You need to be as honest with yourself as you are with everyone else. Moron." So, Kyoya and I were on the same brainwave on that point. That's a scary thought. Clearly, Tamaki had feelings for Haruhi. I knew it, and if Kyoya suspected it, it meant that I was right. Go me. I'm da bomb.

"What does it matter how I view her? She's my little girl because I want to protect her and spend my time with her, just like any father would." Tamaki responded back in his normal light voice, though it sounded a bit less boisterous than before. I wonder if Tamaki was ever going to understand his feelings like it seemed everyone did. Even Hikaru wasn't that dense.

I smiled as they continued to talk about miscellaneous things. They talked about the Host club, about books, about what classes they would be taking, about the Ouran fair that would take place two weeks after the start of the trimester, and even about what shapes the stucco in the ceiling made. They were having a good time, so I decided that I would vacate the room as silently as I could.

As I walked down the hallway I chortled to myself. Kyoya lied to Haruhi when he told her that he was only a friend to Tamaki because he had something to gain. I mean, he really did care about Tamaki. They were best friends. There was no reason that they could talk about random shapes in the ceiling without being best friends. That kind of inane conversation can only take place between people who were insanely close. If he cared that much for someone so opposite himself, he had to have cared about everyone. He was just piss poor at showing it. I let out a sigh of relief. At least Kyoya did actually have a soul.

_Tell me that you're alright_

Hmn, it was probably Kurt trying to find me in this huge ass house.

"Hello?"

"Kate-Kantoku, I'm so glad that I was finally able to contact you. I stood outside of your house nearly all day today and then your neighbor said that you had gone to the Products Expo so I went there and tried to page you over the intercom but then I ran into the Haruhi Fujioka and he gave me your cell phone number, and I'm so glad that I caught you!" Kazukiyo, the president of the Choir club, practically screamed into the phone. He was panicky in general, but this was more insane than usual.

"What's wrong Kazukiyo? Couldn't this have waited till tomorrow when school starts again?" I felt something softly touch my lower back. I turned quickly, a bit frightened when I saw Kurt standing right next to me. He mouthed an apology as he opened the door for me, leading me outside.

"You know how the Choir club has been having regular rehearsals this summer for _Grease_. Well, yesterday the guy playing Danny Zuko was pushed off of the stage by the Grease Lightning car because someone didn't put the emergency brakes on and, well, he broke his leg."

"Are you telling me that we have no Danny Zuko!" I screamed into the phone. It was probably a good thing that we were in the car by now, because this was horrible news! There can be no _Grease_ without a Danny Zuko; there just can't be! "Isn't there an understudy?"

"Well, I'm the understudy, but since I'm the Class 1A Student Council representative I have to spend most of the practice sessions before the Ouran fair getting for our Class event."

"You're the president for goodness sakes. Take one for the team man!"

"You don't understand Kate-Kantoku. I can't play someone like Danny Zuko, that's why I sent a mass e-mail out to the student body to hold a summer auditioning session for the part."

"Good." I sighed, a little bit relieved. At least he was a smart kid, "Who is the new Danny?" There was silence on the other line. All that I could hear was the wary breath of Kurt and the sound of the tired moving across the pavement, "Kazukiyo. Answer me."

"No one auditioned."

"What?"

"I'm sorry Kantoku. I'm going to try and find someone, but we only have a week until the performance." That's right. I moved the performance up a week so that Tamaki could play the piano in the orchestra and so that the rest of the students could participate in their Class events and their other club events. Besides, the students had decided to do a more classical concert during the actual festival, going to each Classes event and singing songs that matched whatever theme the specific class event was. How could I forget that! "Kantoku. This is why we have you. This is the same thing that happened last year to the Choir club, but because they didn't have a director that wasn't busy with other preparations they had to cancel. I know you'll save us." And he hung up.

"Kate, you look like death." I looked over at Kurt, my face contorted into the sourest and angriest expression I could muster. I had to find a lead male vocalist for _Grease_ in one week. One fucking week!

IIIII

A/N – So, sad last few chapters' right? I'm sorry, but plot needed to happen. There should only be two more chapters left after this one. Sad day. For this chapter I really wanted to give some airtime to Kyoya. For this I used the anime timeline. Yes, I know, poetic license. I chose to do a Kyoya centric chapter because Kyoya is my favorite Host, and Kate kind of treats him like he is Satan. I mean, he is quite evil, but I feel like he needs a bit of redemption…in this story at least. I hope that I don't take him OOC, and I don't think that I do much, but I really wanted to write a scene showcasing the friendship between Tamaki and Kyoya when they are behind closed doors and not with the rest of the host club.

I have a question for y'all though. How the next chapter is structured/begins kind of depends on how many people respond to this question and what the majority votes. I would appreciate it if you would either review the answer to the question or message me about the answer because it isn't simple enough to make a poll out of.

The question is….Who should play Danny Zuko? The reason this isn't simple enough to make a poll out of is that it isn't limited to just the Host club characters. It can be anyone in the Ouran Manga.

Thanks guys! I can't believe it's almost the end!


	25. And So It Goes

A/N – Okay, so I got a few people who responded to the Danny Zuko thing, but everyone said someone different. I decided to write down names and stick them in a cup and decide that way since there was no majority vote (except for Haruhi, but Haruhi can't sing in the anime/manga so using her would be taking too much poetic license). I hope you enjoy the choice. Once I picked it from the hat, I found that it worked incredibly well as far as personality type for the two characters.

Thank you to KageNoNeko for being an extremely consistent reviewer, your reviews have helped a lot.

This is the second to last chapter. The next one is it. There also may be a short epilogue, but I am not sure about that yet. I may actually post the last chapter tomorrow night because it is the chapter that I have had in my mind since the story begun having plot. Thanks to all of you for your support so far, and I hope that you continue to give me your input.

The music in this chapter is Don't Stop Believing by Journey and Heaven's Not Enough, performed by Steve Conte, written by Yoko Kanno, and from the anime Wolf's Rain (if you're looking for a good anime series I would recommend it.

Don't forget to review!

IIIII

And So It Goes

"I know it's the first day of the new semester so I'm not going to give you any homework, but I'd like all of you to make sure you know all of the basic formulas because when come back tomorrow we are going to move right on to Pre-calc. Don't forget that if you're in Physics after lunch I want your angular momentum summer projects handed in before class starts. It's even better if you drop them off now."

"Kurt, you're harsh to your students. This is why I don't teach science or math; there's no room for creativity. No mome raths outgrabeing, no velar nasals, no misplaced modifiers. Just numbers and numbers scare me; there are too many of them." I leaned back in the chair I was sitting in and placed my legs on top of the desk. It was the first day of classes and, being the intelligent person I am, I decided to come with Kurt and sit through his morning lectures. The school was already buzzing with people figuring out what they were doing for the Ouran fair. Insane people. Rich people are insane people.

"Uh, sensei. Can I stay in here for lunch?" A student with red hair asked Kurt. The kid was freaky looking, not going to lie.

"Sure Casanoda-kun, just keep it down today?" Kurt told the student, coming over to the desk I was at and shoving my legs off so that he could sit down. He was wearing these really awkward red corduroy pants with an untucked pink shirt and white tie.

"You know, just because we're back at school doesn't mean that you have to look like a complete geek." I grabbed his shirttail and flipped it up, giving him the stink eye before laughing at myself, "Then again, you're pretty damn sexy anyways." I shifted a look back at the student behind me before grabbing the hideous tie and pulling him down into a kiss.

"You're only being romantic because you're upset that no one in the Host club can be Danny Zuko. Even Tamaki turned you down."

"Tamaki has to play the piano; we have no one else to do that. Besides, can you really picture Honey as Danny Zuko? He's shorter than Momoka for heaven's sake!" I was still screwed on the whole lack of a male lead for the Choir club's production of _Grease_. I was already banking on the fact that I would have to step in and try and act like a man. It was a good thing Momoka was around my height, because I was already going to make a fool of myself. Today was going to be a horrible day, and not just because of the mysterious case of a missing greaser. Tonight I was cashing in on the promise I made my mom. I was going to talk to my father for the first time in fifteen years. All of the paperwork and logistics were worked out as far as the prison system went, and tonight was the night. Needless to say, I was _not_ looking forward to that phone call.

"Don't worry about it, Kate. Something will turn up, it always does. Besides, shouldn't you be focusing more on what you are going to say tonight? I would be more worried about that if I was in your shoes." Kurt was getting good at guessing what I was thinking about. That was kind of creepy, not going to lie.

"I am going to worry about it now. I have to try and do all I can for these students while I am here at Ouran and…"

"Don't stop believing. Hold on to that feeling. Streetlight people, oh oh OH!" I flopped my head backwards over the chair as a voice interrupted my words. Through my upside-down vision I saw the scary kid rocking out, in English, to probably one of the greatest hits of all time. A sickeningly sinister grin that would rival even Kaoru and Hikaru's etched its way onto my face as I slithered out of the chair, casually walking towards the student in the back.

"Kate. Don't hurt him; He's a student. No prowling in my classroom." I heard Kurt say behind me as he followed me, but I ignored him.

"Just a small-town girl, living in a lonely world." He sang again. He must have restarted the song. He had good taste. He had a good voice. He was mine. I sat down in the desk next to him, Kurt sitting next to me as I grabbed the headphones and pulled them out of the crimson haired boy's ears.

"Hello, Casanoda-kun. I'm sorry to interrupt, but I have a proposition for you." I grinned at him narrowing my eyes. He widened his gaze. Was I intimidating him? You bet.

"Uh. I, uh."

"My name is Kate Amendier, and I used to teach at this school until recently. What would you say to joining me on a quest to save the Choir club from complete and utter humiliation?" My voice was like butter as I extended my hand and placed it on the desk, very close to his. This was the oldest trick in the book. If you are physically closer to anyone, male or female, it makes them let their guard down a bit, and he already looked as nervous as Tamaki did when the twins were spreading their mischief around.

"I don't think that would be such a good idea. Most people stay away from me so I doubt that I could do anything about it." Casanoda said, trying to stand up. Not going to happen. You aren't escaping from me. I grabbed him by the shoulder and pulled him back into the chair, giving him a small glare as I raised my eyebrow at him.

"Casanoda-kun." He looked over to Kurt, probably trying to get some support. Obviously I was frightening the poor student. Deep inside of my heart I wanted to hug this boy and ask him why he didn't have any friends, but that was so deep down that it would take an insurmountable wave of energy to drag it up to the surface. I would be concerned about him later, "The school musical is this Friday evening, and I am in the precarious situation of not having a male lead. If I do not find a male lead then the entire production will be shut down and the Choir club will be the disgrace of this year's Ouran Fair." So it wasn't completely true because I was planning on jumping in if I couldn't find anyone, but telling him that everything rested on his shoulders would be rather effective in getting what I wanted.

"I'm sure they would rather have that happen then me apart of something." Damn this kid's depression was making it difficult to reason with him. Again, I probably should be telling him that people do like him and that he isn't a complete loaner, but I really just needed him to be my Danny Zuko, regardless of his insecurities.

"Look, Casanoda-kun, you have two choices," I heard Kurt whisper my name under his breath, trying to berate me for the sudden shift of tone that I was exhibiting, but it didn't matter. Something had to go my way, and I would make it happen, "Choice number one, choose to learn the music and lines by Friday and perform in the musical, saving the Choir club and becoming the school idol for being a supreme vocalist. Choice number two, do none of those things and someday, somehow, I will find you and beat you with a stick after telling everyone at Ouran that you don't hang out with people because you are gay. I would choose wisely if I were you."

For dramatic emphasis I stood up and walked out of the room, making sure that I fluffed my hair behind my back, making an exit. Once I got out of the room I turned and stood against the wall.

3

2

1

"Kate-san!" Casanoda came out of the room, almost knocking into me. Yahtzee!

"Oh, Casanoda-kun. You made a decision already?" I flipped back to the sultry smooth voice, uncrossing my arms and linking them behind my back, trying to look innocent.

"I'll do it. I've been meaning to try and improve my character lately and maybe this will help me. If it doesn't I'll probably have to still go see Morinozuka, but I'll do it." I smirked, patting Casanoda on the shoulder. I didn't really care what he was planning on talking to Mori about, but I did care that I now had a Danny Zuko. Besides, since he was so frightening looking he could definitely play a greaser, though, we would have to use a lot of stage make up so that he didn't scare away the audience. Oh well, that's the price we pay for being one hundred percent amazing.

IIIII

Heaving an exhausted but proud sigh I plopped down on the couch once I had gotten home. Kurt locked the door and set his messenger back down, joining me on the couch, lifting up my head and setting it on his lap.

"You know, you probably should have treated Casanoda-kun a bit nicer this morning." Kurt admonished me as he began to stroke my cheek.

"He'll be fine. He's a tough guy. Besides, once everyone stopped staring at him during rehearsal and actually had to get close to him, he seemed to be enjoying himself. I knew what I was doing." I reached up and patted his cheek with my hand, nuzzling my nose into his belly, "He learns things pretty fast, so he should have it down by Thursday's dress rehearsal. I gave him a copy of the entire musical, and I expect that he will have most of it memorized by tomorrow's rehearsal. I even spend an extra half hour helping him run lines today while you were teaching physics. Things will work out."

"It's nice to see you so happy and boisterous, especially after everything that's happened." He kissed the top of my head before standing up slowly so that my head didn't slam onto the cushion, "What are we having for dinner?" I sighed, sitting up and glaring at the man who was looking into the refrigerator so intently that I thought his eyes would get freezer burn. Shaking my head I got up and squeezed into the space left between his arms and the refrigerator doors, grabbing a bag of marinating chicken and vegetables. I moved to a drawer and pulled out a few skewers, making sure that I poked Kurt with one of them.

"It's been a month since Mom died; I'm going to talk to my father and finally put all of that behind me. I'm moving on up and heading on out. It's going to feel fucking fantastic."

"Language." Kurt placed his chin on my shoulder as he watched me stick the meat and veggies onto the skewers, placing the completed kabobs on a platter.

"Now, grill-master, you go slow grill these things outside while I make my phone call." I handed the plate to Kurt and washed my hands, leaning over for a kiss before watching him walk outside. After drying off my hands I walked into the bedroom and shut the door, picking up my cell phone and waiting. I didn't want to do this. I hadn't had contact with this man for over fifteen years, and I didn't want to start now. I wonder if getting the call, saying hello, and then hanging up would be considered keeping a promise.

_Tell me that you're alright_

_Yeah everything is…_

"Hello, this is Kathrin." I said hesitantly, my voice cracking a bit. Calm down, Kathrin. Just breathe.

"Kathrin Amendier," A computer voice answered. Stupid legal crap. Let me just say hi and bye and hang up already, "If you would like to accept a call from inmate Charles Mitchell Damien press one, if you would like to talk to someone else please stay on the line…"

_Beep_

"Greetings, Kathrin. It's been a long time." His voice was like poison in my ears. I squinted and tried to pretend it was a bad dream, but when I opened my eyes I was in the same place, holding the phone to my ears.

"Hi. Da..da.."

"Don't worry, Kathrin. You don't have to call me that. I wouldn't expect you to ever call me that again. Just call me 'Mitch,' it's what everyone else calls me." How the hell could he be so cavalier about this conversation? He had killed my sister. He had fucking killed my mother. He had tried to kill me. What was his problem? I should just hang up.

"Kathrin. I know you probably want to hang up the phone right now, and I know that you are only doing this because your mother told you to. She came to see me you know. She showed me some pictures of you, including ones from Japan. I have to say, I like the one of you standing underneath the cherry blossom trees. It was always my dream to go to Japan and see them. I guess that's one thing that you and I have in common: our mutual love of Japanese culture. Not to mention your mother told me that you recently received your masters in Linguistics like I did. I knew you were a smart one."

"I'm nothing like you." I spat. I wanted him to yell at me, or curse at me, or tell me I was worthless. Having a normal conversation was one of those things that I hoped would happen, but now that it was happening, it made me feel as if I was the criminal for wanting to completely debase this man I was talking to.

"I used to think I was nothing like my father. He was a horrible man. Came after me with a butcher knife when I was thirteen. You never knew this but he took my arm off that day. The arm you grew up seeing was a prosthetic. I was a young man then though, so I was able to fight back, unlike you or Lily."

"Don't you dare talk about her." It seemed like he was trying to rationalize his behavior by telling me about his troubled past. I didn't believe him.

"Kathrin. I can't tell you that I am sorry about what I did. I can't even tell you that I regret what I did. It was such a sudden decision. I loved you, your mother, and your sister more than anything. Then, one day, all of you suddenly made me realize that I hated emotion, any emotion. So I got angry. Then I became apathetic, and once that happened all of you were liabilities. A psychiatrist the brought to the trial said that I suffered a type of sociopathic break. He said that my father most likely suffered from it as well."

"Do you think I give a flying fuck?" Shut-up. Shut-up. Shut-up! How could anyone be so remorseless within a conversation.

"You're a curser too. I kicked the habit. In prison having a filthy mouth doesn't prove that you're an alpha dog like it does on the outside. Let me ask you a question, Kathrin. Do you have hard time showing emotion and tend to distance yourself from people when you feel too strongly for them?"

I didn't answer. Mostly I didn't answer because I didn't want to answer that in the affirmative. I cared about the people I loved. I had even gotten a lot better at outwardly expressing my emotions while in Japan. I cried in front of people here, which had never happened before.

"When your mother passed away did you weep and grieve all day or did you rationalize what happened and choose to distance yourself from it? Do you use humor to compensate when something is bothering you? Do people who are flamboyant and incredibly positive make you think that they are mentally ill? When you're with the person you love the most do you both always seem to speak in playful banter, not really diving into deep conversations unless it is about someone else?"

"Who do you think you are? You don't even know me!" How can you see through me? The last two questions he asked. It was Tamaki and Kurt that went through my head. That first day when I met Tamaki and bluntly said _It must be hell inside your head_. And Kurt, how many deep and profound conversations did we have? We must have had a few, but most of them were broken up by me trying to be funny.

"Kathrin. I know you because you are so much like me. When your mother came to see me, I asked her about you. She even told me herself that you reminded her so much of the man she fell in love with."

"You're lying. I don't believe you." I did though. There was no way he could have affected me this much with his words, words that rang too true, to be able to make it all up. He couldn't be this good of a judge of character after fifteen years of never seeing me.

"Your mom showed me pictures of those boys that you've been teaching, and that man you've been with. Kathrin, don't let what happened to you happen to them. My father snapped; I snapped; who's to say that you won't."

"I'm _nothing_ like you!" I spat, ignoring the tears that were streaming down my face. Everything he had said this far was me. In some way or another they were things that I had said to myself. I didn't want to accept it, but…

"Remember that day when you were seven and came home from school and a boy on the playground pushed you off of the slide and you hurt yourself. When you got home your mother and I tried to figure out what had happened during your day because you had a bruise all up your arm, but you just forced a smile and said that nothing happened. Once the principal called us we finally figured out what happened. Your mom was so upset that you didn't tell us what happened and she grumbled 'you're ya fathes chil' alright.'"

"Shut-up." I didn't know what bothered me more: him talking about a time when we were still a family or the fact that I knew that that wasn't a false memory because I remembered her words very clearly. She had even said them to me in college, though then she qualified them with the words, 'before all o' that mess happen.'

"Kathrin, get out before you snap. Get out while they're still safe. Just get…"

"Your time with this inmate has reached its close. If you would like to petition California State Prison systems for further time with this inmate then press the pound symbol on the keypad. If you…"

I hung up, slamming the phone down on the bedside table. I grabbed my waist and sunk off the bed, towards the ground, pulling my knees up to my chin. I wanted to say that nothing he said was true, but that would be a lie.

Hearing the screen door open and close, I quickly got up and ran to the bathroom, wiping away all trace of tears from my face, splashing some cold water on my face and taking a large breath before walking into the kitchen.

"Damn! That smells so good." I said, sitting down at the barstool next to Kurt as he slid some of the grilled food onto my plate.

"Of course it smells good. I made it." He flashed me a grin before sitting down, slipping me a kiss on the cheek before slipping his food off of the skewer.

"Touché Hisugawa, Touché." I smiled, forcing back the voice of my father talking about playful banter.

"How did your conversation go with your father?" Kurt took a bite of a large pepper, turning to me with his cheeks full of food.

"It wasn't very long. I just told him about Mom's death and that I forgave him, just like Mom wanted me too." I grinned falsely before sticking my own food into my mouth. Lies. We at the rest of our dinner in silence and then I went to bed shortly after, putting my headphones in and putting on some music to try and help me fall asleep and forget about everything that man had said, to try and banish his words from my mind and slip into my unconscious.

_And heaven does enough_

_You think you know it and it uses you_

"_Ranka! Ranka what happened?" I ran towards the man who was lying on the ground, his limbs splayed in awkward directions, deep cuts all through his body. He was trying to whisper something, so I moved his red hair from his face and bent down._

"_Ha…Haru…hi." He breathed out as he pointed towards a large lake. No! No! She couldn't be. I sprinted towards the body of water, diving in, feeling the cold water stab my skin like small toothpicks._

_I saw so many things_

_But like a dream always losing me in a cloud_

_Haruhi! I found her, she was floating under the water, suspended. As I reached her I choked back tears. Her big eyes were lifeless, tiny bubbles escaping her mouth. I tried to grab her when I felt something grab me by ankle._

"_Kate-sempai, don't leave us!" Hikaru and Kaoru pleaded together, the two of them trying to reach out their hands to mine. I extended my arm, reaching with all my might, but they seemed to drift further and further away from me. The more I tried the more life flowed from their eyes until there was nothing left and they floated down._

_Cause I couldn't cry_

_Cause I turned away_

_Couldn't see the score_

_I swam downwards into the depths, trying to find the twins. Trying to find something. Anything._

"_I'm scared, Takashi." Honey. Oh God, where's Honey? I looked around only to see Mori cut in front of me, cradling the smaller teenager. They looked like they were heading towards the surface, but all of a sudden the sound of rushing water surged around me as the three of us were caught in a whirlpool. I screamed, trying to swim out of the current, panting when I was finally safe._

_Didn't know the pain_

_Of leaving yesterday really far behind_

"_Honey! Mori!" I yelled across the still waters of the lake, but no one answered. Shit. No, no, no this isn't happening! I dipped my head underneath the water, only to see the two young men clutching one another stiffly, their eyes closed._

_In another life_

_In another dream_

_By a different name_

"_Ame-sempai!" _

"_Tamaki! Thank God." I hugged the blond boy that had just swum up to me. Thank goodness._

"_Follow me. Quickly. We have to save momma!" As quickly as Tamaki came he dove underneath the water. I followed him, swimming down to the depths of the lake._

_Gave it all away_

_For a memory_

_And a quiet lie_

"_Kyoya! Kutano!" The two of them were on the bottom of the lake. I yelled, rushing towards the two of them. Kyoya's leg was attached to a solid ball and chain, "Tamaki, try and get him unlatched from that. I'll get Kurt."_

_And I felt the face_

_Of a cold tonight_

_Still don't know the score_

_I swam over to Kurt whose torso was being crushed by a boulder. He tried to open his mouth but I covered it with my hand, forcing him to keep holding his breath as I maneuvered the rock off. I grabbed Kurt's body and shot him up into the lake above me, hoping that he floated all the way to the top as I turned towards Tamaki._

_But I know the pain_

_Of leaving everything really far behind_

"_Ame-sempai, just leave. Go on. I'm going to stay with him." Tamaki told me as I shook my head in refusal of the fact. Kyoya wasn't moving and Tamaki had not been able to take off the ball and chain. I watched as Tamaki grabbed Kyoya by the hand, his body convulsing as the water filled his lungs. I couldn't watch anymore, so I swam upwards, trying not to sob underneath the water as I felt the weight of the water crush around me._

_And if I could cry_

_And if I could live what truth I did _

_Then take me there_

"_Kurt! No. Please no!" I grabbed his shoulder and dragged him towards the shore. The warmth was leaving his body; I could feel it escaping my grasp as I pulled his body towards me, laying his head on my lap, "Who did this? Who did this to you?" I watched fresh tears fall upon his blanching cheek as I leaned over for him to whisper in my ear._

"_You. You. You."_

_Heaven goodbye_

"Holy shit!" I whispered, jolting myself up in bed, placing my hand on my heart. I opened my eyes and looked over at Kurt who was still sound asleep. With my hand, as softly as I could, I brushed a stray hair from his face. Getting up I took out my headphones and turned off my iPod, heading upstairs to the study.

Sitting down, I took a huge breath while waiting for my laptop to turn on, holding my breath in for a while before letting it out slowly.

_Get out before you snap_. _Get out while they're still safe_.

Who was I fooling? I didn't belong here with these people. Everything my father said was so logical, so rational. How could it not be true? I knew it was. I knew it was, and I had made up my mind.

I opened the internet browser and typed in the URL for United airlines, booking a flight for Saturday morning at five a.m. Friday night was the performance, and the Host club would be coming over after the musical for dinner. It would be suspicious if I canceled. If they all left by midnight, that would give me enough time to make sure Kurt fell asleep and to hail a cab at three a.m. so that I made it to the Narita airport on time for my flight. It was perfect.

I closed my eyes, letting a stray tear fall down my cheek. I had to do this. I just had to.


	26. I'm Leavin' On a Jet Plane

A/N – Awwww…last chapter! There will be a longer author's note on the epilogue since I am posting them at the same time. The song in this chapter is Bruised by Jack's Mannequin.

Don't forget to review!

IIIII

I'm Leavin' On a Jet Plane

"We'll always be together. We'll always be together!" Kurt was bopping his head along with the club members in the tail of the pick-up who were singing the last song from _Grease_. It was a wonderful performance. Though I couldn't see the audience because I was behind a curtain directing the orchestra, I could tell that they were interested in the play. Even Kyoya, Mori, and Haruhi, through they were not singing along, were grinning as all of them bounced in the back. This was the best farewell gift that I could receive.

My plans were still set. As soon as the Host club left for the night I would slip a Tylenol PM in Kurt's tea that he always drank before bed. Once I knew he was asleep I would move my duffel bag full of clothes out from where it was stuffed under the bed, and call the cab company to come pick me up.

The more and more I interacted with the boys, Haruhi, or Kurt, the more paranoid I became. This was no way for me to live, and it wasn't fair to them. Despite the fact that my father was a wretch lower than fleas, he was right, and I couldn't afford to stay and figure out just how like him I was.

"Congratulations on a wonderful performance, Kate." Kurt yelled over the merriment going on in the backseat, grabbing my hand and lifting it to his lips, sending a sideways glance my way. I closed my eyes and took a heavy breath inward, trying to slow the pounding of my heart. This wasn't going to be easy, but once I was on the plane in the early hours of the morning, I would force all of this out of my mind. To just forget all about it.

"I'm starving. What's for dinner?" I heard Hikaru say behind me as Kurt parked the car in front of the house. I remembered that he was the one who had gotten into the truck bed first, and the bluntness with which he proclaimed his hunger was quite a giveaway as well.

"Taquitos. It is a traditional Mexican dish consisting of a meat and cheese filling wrapped in a shell made of corn called a tortilla. In Mexico they are sometimes referred to as flautas, which means 'flute' in Spanish." Kyoya skillfully, and gracefully I might add, jumped out of the truck while writing something in his black notebook. Did this kid know absolutely everything there was to know? I rolled my eyes before looking down at the pavement and smiling. Though Kyoya was incredibly evil, he was a wonderful young man. And no, the irony and contradiction does not escape me.

I unlocked the door and right before opening it two bodies flew by me, entering the house and running into the kitchen. One of them opened the refrigerator door while the other one lobbed his arm around his twin, the two of them reaching down into the fridge and producing a tray filled with uncooked taquitos, setting them on the stove and turning it on.

"You two are going to burn my house down if you think you can put all of them in the oven at once!" I ran towards the two twins, pulling out a sheet of foil and unshackling the food, "Shit that's cold!" Devil fox twins! They had put an ice cube down my shirt.

"Kate, language." They shoved ice down my back and I'm the one who needed to keep myself in check? Typical. So incredibly typical. I shook the cube from its place underneath my shirt, turning around to walk back into the living room when I felt myself fly forward. Damn those twins. Damn that stupid ice cube!

"Amendier, be more careful." Mori's gruff voice spoke down to me as I felt my body being lifted up midair so that I was on my feet once again.

"Thanks. I'll take that into consideration." I turned around and bent down to pick up what was left of the deadly ice cube, watching Hikaru put the tray that I had gotten ready into the oven, a grin etching on my face as the two of them bent over to watch the food cook. As quietly as I could, I took two ice cubes out of the freezer and walked behind the twins, letting the ice drop into the back of their pants.

"Kate-sempai!" The two of them screamed, running in tandem out of the kitchen and towards the bathroom. I am supreme. I placed my elbow on the counter, leaning my chin on a closed fist.

"Haruhi, wasn't tonight just spectacular! Could you hear me play the piano? Wasn't I great?" Tamaki was practically jumping up and down in front of Haruhi, his eyes sparkling. He did do a surprising job at tonight's performance and in all of the rehearsals when he took charge of the orchestra while I worked with the actors and singers.

"Tamaki-sempai, everyone did a good job." Haruhi meant it as a complement, but as Tamaki rushed into the corner of the room, curling up in the fetal position on a recliner; he probably took it to mean 'you did nothing extraordinary.' "Uh, what I mean was…uh."

"No need to explain it to him Haruhi, Tamaki knows that everyone played an equal part in tonight's production. He just wants to be recognized for his own inane efforts." Kyoya said harshly, earning an even larger pout from Tamaki, and a roll of the eyes from Haruhi.

"Tamaki-sempai, just because I said everyone did a good job doesn't mean that I couldn't hear the piano."

"Really Haruhi? Are you impressed with your daddy?" And there goes the rebound. I chuckled as the oven behind me beeped. As I turned around I was suddenly chest to chest with Kurt. We, it was more chest to diaphragm, but who pays attention to those things.

"Uh, I'll get it." He smiled, turning around and lifting the food out of the oven and placing it on the counter. I blushed. This was definitely going to be harder than I wanted it to be, "Come on boys! Food time!" Kurt yelled, reaching up into the cabinet and pulling down some paper plates. All of a sudden I felt two arms attach themselves to my shoulders, both of the Hitachiin's leaning on me with their full body weight. I mentally shrugged since I couldn't lift my shoulders.

"Ahhh! It's hot!" Honey yelled, curling his little lips, his eyes watering.

"Mitsukuni, let it cool off first." Yes, this was going to be harder than I thought it would be. I looked from face to face. Kyoya's deadpan curiosity as he twirled the taquito between his fingers. He probably thought that eating finger food was above him, like I had overheard him tell Haruhi at the Expo. The twins had moved over so that they were right in front of the food. Each of them had a taquito in their hands, blowing on the steaming food. Honey was warily looking down at the food warily, while Mori was looking down at Honey, ready to jump in if needed.

"Hmn. These are really good." Haruhi said with a little bit of a lift in her voice, her eyes growing wider. I watched as Tamaki sneakily shifted one of his onto her plate, taking a bite of the one he had in his hand.

"I bet we could serve these at the Host club, especially if we did a Latin theme. Imagine everyone dressed up in sombreros! Haruhi, you would look so cute in a salsa dress!" Tamaki cried into the air, blushing when he mentioned Haruhi. She would look cute in a salsa dress, but it was obvious his fantasy went beyond just cosplay.

"If you served them at the Host club you could always called Tamakitos. The girls would probably really love that." Kurt laughed at his own joke, everyone else following suit. It was a chorus of laughs: Haruhi's soft tinkling bells, Kurt's rushing river, Tamaki's crushing waves, all of them were there. This was how it was supposed to be.

IIIII

"Kate, is there something wrong?" Kurt asked as he came up behind me and wrapped his arms around me, kissing my neck. Of course there was, or there would be. It was right for me. He would think that it was wrong, but in time he would forget all about me and move on with his life. That was my hope for him.

"No. I am just really tired. You're probably pretty tired yourself." I turned towards him, but I couldn't look him in the eyes. All of a sudden his body began to droop on top of me. Those sleeping pills were starting to kick in. I can't believe that I am a horrible enough person that I would drug him, but you do what you have to do I guess.

"Wow, I just got lightheaded all of a sud…" And he was gone. Shit, I didn't really think about this ahead of time. Maybe I should have only used two. Oh well, at least he was completely comatose. I forced his body onto the bed. I could feel his soft breath on the nape of my neck, and I tried to ignore the heat that was coming to my cheeks.

Once I had gotten him secured on the bed I sat down and pulled his hair out of the pony tail, brushing my fingers through it.

"You don't know how much I love you, Kutano Hisugawa. You deserve so much better." I brushed my lips against his, forcing back the tears that were already stinging my eyes. Quickly I got off of the bed and pulled out my duffle back, going to the closet to check if there was anything in there that I had missed. When I opened the door, a silky green dress greeted me. With a shaky hand I reached forward to touch the beautiful gown, a flood of memories rushing back to me.

_"It's nice to finally meet you Kathrin Amendier, or can I call you Kate?" _

_"I know who the hell I am, but who the hell are you!" _

_"I'm not particularly the most mannered person. My name is Kutano Hisugawa, and in the eventuality that I get to call you Kate, you can call me Kurt." _

Those smoky eyes that I had met that fateful night when the twins had changed my entire wardrobe out for this beautiful satin dress. Who would have thought that he would have come to mean so much to me? The fact that he meant so much to me was why I had to leave. The fact that all of them had wormed their way into my heart was why I had to leave. I had to make sure that I protected them at all costs, even if it was from myself. So, I quickly shut the closet door, putting the dress out of my sight, out of my mind, and grabbed my duffle bag.

It was just about 2:30am, just about time to get in the taxi and head off to the airport. Standing before the door I reached out my hand to touch the wood. I remembered being dragged to this house against my will; I also remembered that stupid Alice and Wonderland cosplay. So many memories I would be leaving behind. Sighing I grabbed the doorknob and opened the door.

"Where are you going?" The twins suddenly appeared before me, linking their arms and stopping me from walking away. What the hell were they doing here? I quickly pulled my arms behind my back, trying to conceal the fact that I was holding a duffle bag ticket. My mind had been made up, and they were not going to change my plans because they had some type of prank up their sleeves. Sorry boys, not this time.

"Excuse me." I walked forward, pushing through their arms.

"Kate," It was Kaoru. To my surprise, I knew it was him now, after so long guessing and paying particular attention to their hair and their voice. Ironic that it was only now that I knew him, "You promised." He grabbed my arm and I turned my neck back to look at him. His yellow eyes were pleading, but amidst that plea there was anger. Good, now you know how I feel, Kaoru.

"Promises are meant to be broken." I wrenched my hand from his grasp. Hikaru was looking from me to his brother, a look of confusion on his face. Kaoru just stared downward, his hair falling down to hide his eyes. I fought the urge to go back, to make a joke out of this situation, but it wasn't going to happen. My mind was made up. Besides, they, all of them, had so much life to live. They didn't need a cynic who was probably going to become a complete sociopath in the future.

"This isn't fair, Kate-sempai! You were like our sister!" So Hikaru had finally figured it out. Good for him. Sorry twins, but I was getting out of this carriage. I slammed the door on the both of them still standing on the porch. They could go in and tell Kurt (if he even woke up) but it wouldn't change anything, so I stopped looking at them and concentrated on the pavement in front of the car.

The taxi wove its way through traffic the same way I wove through the airport security. It all seemed as if it had taken only a few seconds. I felt like the walking dead as I walked through the airport. A part of me kept saying that I was making a mistake. I knew which part too, it was my heart. My heart was here. My heart was laying in bed next to a drugged up physics teacher. But, as I said before, the heart wasn't to be trusted. I was doing the right thing because it was the logical thing.

"Flight number 2631, nonstop from Tokyo to San Diego, is now boarding at gate 37." An extremely high and squeaky voice said first in Japanese, then again in English. I stood up and walked through the gate and into the plane, finding my window seat and stuffing my duffel in the overhead compartment. I watched as people began to file in. This morning's flight wasn't full, and I had made sure that I booked a seat where other people were not going to sit.

It was horrible, waiting like this. I just wanted them to get this plane started and drive on off. Sighing, I got up and pulled my iPod out of my bag and stuck the earbuds in my ears. Oh consummate friend. My music, you have been with me since day one, always giving me something to think about.

_I've got my things, I'm good to go_

_You met me at the terminal_

_Just one more plane ride and it's done_

Hmn. How fucking appropriate. It never failed that when you put the iPod on shuffle you were either going to get a song that was super random or one that fit whatever was happening perfectly. It was true though, after this plane ride it would be done, all over with.

_We stood like statues at the gate_

_Vacation's come and gone too late_

_There's so much sun where I'm from_

_I had to give it away, had to give you away_

I looked out the window. It looked like it was raining outside. Wouldn't that just be horribly cliché? I looked around, noticing a guy with a power washer. Well, at least he was washing something over my window; it might as well be raining.

_And we spent four days on an_

_Island at your family's old hotel_

_Sometimes perfection can be_

_It can be perfect hell, perfect...hell_

I remembered that day we were at the beach, suddenly it all came back to me. I remembered getting horribly pissed off at all of them for digging around in my past where they didn't belong. They had all made my life a living hell at times, but it was a type of perfect hell. It was just like the hell in Tamaki's head. So beyond a normal humans capacity to be upbeat and idealistic, but it was sweet and endearing.

_Hours pass, and she still counts the minutes_

_That I am not there, I swear I didn't mean_

_For it to feel like this_

_Like every inch of me is bruised, bruised_

_And don't fly fast. Oh, pilot can you help me?_

_Can you make this last? This plane is all I got_

_So keep it steady, now_

_Cause every inch you see is bruised_

I wiped away a small tear from my cheek. How dare that happen now? I knew that this was the right thing to do; I knew it! Stupid emotions, stupid weakness!

_I lace my Chucks, I walk the aisle_

_I take my pills, the babies cry_

_All I hear is what's playing through_

_The in-flight radio_

The stewardess looked at me as she walked back, her eyes lingering on mine. I quickly turned my head back to the window, hiding the fact that I just could not stop the tears. What was wrong? This was the right thing to do. It made the most logical sense. If I was going to end up like my father it was best to do it alone, away from everyone I ever cared about. I was so emotionally and mentally scarred. There was no way that I wasn't going to turn out like him. Was I so much like him? No, I wasn't. I was running away. He never had the courage to run away.

_Now every word of every song_

_I ever heard that made me wanna stay_

_Is what's playing through the in-flight radio, _

_and I, and I am, finally waking up_

But was running away courageous? I wasn't like him. I loved so strongly. Even though I never showed my emotions it didn't mean that I never expressed them. I was subtle in the way I expressed my own feelings, but I was also very blunt when it came to surprise or joy. Around these people I let down my guard more than I had with anyone else. Didn't that count as something?

_Hours pass, and she still counts the minutes_

_That I am not there, I swear I didn't mean_

_For it to feel like this_

_Like every inch of me is bruised, bruised_

And yeah, I was a cynic, but I wasn't a pessimist. I could laugh. I could cry. I could find joy in teaching the International Phonetic Alphabet and creating a game about phrases. I could make fun of people who were idiots, hold my own when it came to tricky twins, and engage in a battle of wits with a teenager who should work for the CIA. I could make awesome ass taquitos!

_Don't fly fast. Oh, pilot can you help me?_

_Can you make this last? This plane is all I got_

I was smart. What was I doing here? What the hell was I thinking, letting him get to me? Yeah, I _was_ everything he said, but I was _so_ much more than that. I was a kick ass, take no prisoners, Linguist! I was Kathrin Amendier, and I was a complete idiot!

_So keep it steady, now_

_Cause every inch you see is…_

Honey, Mori, Kyoya, Hikaru, Kaoru, Haruhi, Tamaki….I'm a bigger idiot than all of you put together!

Kurt, oh God, I am so stupid. I quickly took the earphones out of my ears and stood up, earning the glares of everyone around me. I didn't care. They could shove it.

"Ma'am, please sit down." The stewardess who had caught me tearing up was now in front of me, smiling and kindly pointing towards my seat.

"No. I need to get off of this plane. Now!" I tried to push past her but she just stood there, blocking my way. For a tiny Japanese lady, she was surprisingly strong. Did she not understand that I had just had an mental breakthrough as monumental as the Theory of Relativity. Well, maybe not, but it was pretty damn big.

For one last pause to look back at everything. Yes, this was a quick turn around, and even I was surprised a bit, but most of my mind was made up. I was an inexorable ass. How the hell could I even have thought I was doing the right thing? I was so sure this morning, so fucking sure. Hey, that's life though. Decisions are made on the razors edge.

"Ma'am, I'm sorry but we are already moving. We cannot stop the plane while we are taxing on the runway unless it is a life or death emergency. Please, kindly move back to your seat." That's it? I finally see the light and I am stuck. I guess that's what I get for being a complete imbecile. If I flew home I could always just call Kurt when I arrived in San Diego, tell him that I was a complete asshole, ask him to forgive me for drugging his tea, and then find the next flight out back to Japan. Frustrated with myself and with the stupid stewardess who was just doing her job, I sat down and crossed my arms, looking out the window, pouting. I guess two fifteen hours right would teach me my lesson. I am such a fucking moron! Even greater idiocy was mine than was Tamaki's.

"This is your captain speaking. It seems as if we are going to have to stop the plane. A suspect in a criminal case is stowing away on this plane. Do not panic. Some members of a private police force will be on shortly to apprehend the suspected criminal." How lucky am I? While the cops were on the plane, all I had to do was run out the hatch and back to the airport, hail a taxi, and hope I make it home before Kurt comes out of his coma. I bided my time and waited while everyone around me panicked. Sure, a criminal on the plane was a big deal, but I needed to get off and get as far away from my incredibly asinine mistake as possible.

" Where is Miss Kathrin Amendier?" I jarred away from the window when I heard my name. Uh oh, "The suspect has been apprehended. I repeat, the suspect has been apprehended." I heard a huge man in a black armor body suit say as he grabbed my arm. Another large man dressed the same way grabbed my other arm.

No fucking way! Karma is a bitch, isn't it?

"What the hell? I didn't do anything! Let me go. Get your hands off the goods, mister!" I screamed a flailed, trying to get away. Everyone in the plane was staring at me, including the stewardess who I had previously been pleading with to let me off the plane. Ah, no wonder she looked frightened, she probably put two and two together incorrectly and thought that I was a criminal and wanted to get off of the plane to run from the cops. Damnit.

At least I was off of the plane now. The two men dragged me across the runway and into the terminal. I was getting strange looks from everyone. Ha, this was far different than how it was when I came to Japan. Then I was freaking out because I was lost, now I was freaking out because I was apparently a suspected felon. How the hell do I manage to get myself in these situations?

"Sir," We finally stopped moving. Shit, I felt like my legs were going to fall off. It was a good thing they set me on the ground, "We've apprehended Kathrin Amendier at your request."

"Very good, gentleman. Miss Amendier, I would think that you of all people would know that it is illegal to travel without a passport; however, it is even worse to travel with a passport that has been placed on a hold list." Wait…I knew that voice.

"All travel for you has been suspended for the next six months." Two voices harmonized together. A smile crept to my face. So they _had_ figured it out.

"This is pretty serious, isn't it Takashi?"

"Yeah."

"Now Miss Amendier, you can run but you can't hide, and now you can't leave Japan for another half of a year." I finally looked up, seeing Kyoya's glasses glinting in the light as his pen scratched on his black notebook. Honey was atop Mori's shoulders, Usa-chan hanging from his arms by a pink ear. Hikaru was leaning on Kaoru, both of them with devilish grins.

How long did it take for them to plan all of this after seeing me walk away from the house? Knowing Kyoya, not long at all.

"Ha. Hahahaha. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" I opened my mouth and made the only sound that I could make.

I stayed in my sitting position on the ground and laughed for probably a good three of four minutes. Kyoya, Honey, Mori, Hikaru, and Kaoru's faces looked down at me in utter curiosity and perplexity. At that moment it all hit me harder than it had on the plane, and when I say it hit me I mean that a load of bricks came off of my shoulders. I was under some delusion that I needed to leave, that I needed to run away from the few things that ever made me truly happy. It took me this fucking long to realize this? Good grief Charlie Brown! Living so many years as a cynic just made me misinterpret my own feelings and run away from them like I had run away from everything. I knew who I was, and the moment I wanted to eradicate them from my life would be the time when I signed myself up for psychotherapy, not drown them in a pool. My father was right, but I was the manager of my destiny; I had free will; and I wouldn't become him. Now that I was being forced to stay (how did Kyoya manage all of this by the way?), I finally realized that this was where I belonged. So much for intelligence.

"Thank you. Thank you for making me realize how much of an idiot I really am," I leaned backwards on my hand and propped myself up, pulling each one of them into a hug separately. Boys, boys, boys, "I am serious, you just saved me from becoming the world's biggest asshole."

"Language, Kathrin." Kurt? I turned quickly to see Kutano Hisugawa walking towards me, flanked by Haruhi and Tamaki. So that was how it was? A complete Host club intervention with the King bringing the most important piece of the puzzle. Despite how cheesy and cliché it was to the onlookers, I ran to him, flinging my arms around his neck and bursting into tears.

"I'm sorry Kurt. I can't believe that I am so stupid." Stupid, moron, asshole, jerkface, those words didn't even begin to describe how completely idiotic I felt at the moment. I don't even think that I could express to myself how idiotic I felt or all of the thoughts that came rushing into my mind. If I tried to it would be as long as a novel.

"Kate, I love you because you are so stupid." He kissed my forehead and then leaned his lips into my ear, "Besides, if you want to talk about utter idiocy, look around you." I pulled myself back and looked into his eyes. I saw Tamaki and Haurhi behind him and the rest of the Host club in the reflection of his eyes. It was true, we were surrounded by dummies.

"Touché, Hisugawa. Touché." I pulled him into a tight hug and whispered "I love you so incredibly much," before grabbing his hand and walking past where the androgynous one and the King were standing, "By the way, I'm sorry for drugging you."

"You can pay me back when we get home." He grinned at me, wrapping his arm around my waist and kissing the top of my head. I chuckled, beginning to laugh again. Ha, I finally figured out what my laugh sounded like. It was like popping bubbles. Go figure.

"Well then, let's go home!" I clutched Kurt around the waist, waving goodbye at the Host club. But it really wasn't goodbye now, was it. Oh no, it was just a new hello.


	27. Epilogue:  All's Well That Ends Well

All's Well That Ends Well

"Kate, are you sure you want to do this?" Kurt grabbed me seriously by the shoulders, stopping my procession down Ouran Academy's hallway.

"Of course I want to do this. I have to do this. Don't worry about me, Kurt; I am going to be perfectly fine." It had been about a week and a half since my lame ass attempt at fleeing the country. How could I have gone through with that? Now, I honestly didn't know how I could have come up with that insane idea on my own. My life was here, and whatever happened would happen. I would take life as it came and try to live it on my own terms, not based on my past or my own neurosis.

"This is a really big step, Kate. I just want to make sure that you are sure. You know that I'll support you in whatever decision you make, just don't kill them alright?" I gave Kurt the stink eye. Really? Was 'don't kill them' the best choice of words after what I had done? Bad taste. Serious bad taste.

"Hey, they are now my guinea pigs. As they have become my linguistic experiment, I don't have to worry about caring for what they do; I just have to study it and record my observations. Besides, you were the one who said that I should go to Reitaku U and get my doctorate. Besides, the chairman says that I may have my job back if I show signs of getting a higher education. Can't compete with a Dr. in front of your name, can you?" I poked him in the chest before placing my hand on the brass handle of the incredibly large pink door.

"I know I said that, but do you think that _this_ is really the best topic for your dissertation in linguistics? Surely you could do something more sane." Kurt placed a hand on the door, smirking down at me.

"Both of us know that I am nothing but sane. Besides, why waste a perfectly linguistically relevant research atmosphere. What's more, I already have a working title picked out." I held out my notepad towards him, rocking my head forward so that he would get the hint to read what I had on the paper. It was a stroke of brilliance really. Though I am probably the most brilliant person I know, this dissertation already tasted like victory.

"'High School Never Ends: A Linguistic Study of Archetypes in their Language Specific Roles and in Their Effectiveness amongst Others.'" Kurt read aloud, his eyes narrowing as he glared at me, "You know, weren't you the one who first told Tamaki that it was hell inside of his head? You're just fanning the flames by basing your dissertation on them and their archetype role play."

"Exactly. That's what makes it so wonderful." I gave him a sly grin before pushing down on the handle. When I opened the door, there was the host club. As I walked inside I said hello to all the girls, deciding to start out with the easiest archetype to figure out.

"Welcome princess. I am so moved by your choice to study this club. It's embarrassing to think that my beauty and charm will be forever captured in your scholarly publication. I humbly bow before you as your slave, my goddess of language and humbly offer my beauty for your pen to feast upon."

"Tamaki," I addressed the King, locking my green eyes with his violet ones. The girls around us looked as if they were all about to explode in expectation. This was where I belonged. These people were family.

"Yes, princess?"

"It really is hell inside your head." I crossed my arms and sat back in the couch as Tamaki crawled away into his corner. Yep, this was where I was meant to be.

IIIII

A/N – So it is officially over. Thank you to all of my wonderful reviewers, anonymous and signed. All of you kind of sustained me through this story and I hope that it ended well enough for you. Just so you know, there may be bonus chapters because I love my OC's so much, and I am re-reading the manga and there is some awesome stuff in there. I am not entirely sure about the bonus chapters though. Anyways, I hope that you enjoyed the ride. I surely did! Thanks a bazillions again! Have a wonderful rest of the summer, and I hope to catch you again.


	28. Bonus 1: Why Can't We All Just Get Along

A/N – So here we are at bonus chapter number one. I actually have a few of these planned out, especially since there is kind of a plot, but kind of not. I thought about making it a sequel but decided against it in the long run because I don't think there will be enough to make a sequel. Besides, since classes are starting up again it's not going to be a regular upload at all. Well, I hope that you enjoy this bonus chapter. Don't forget to review, review, review!

Why Can't We All Just Get Along?

"Please tell me why we are doing this. It feels like this is all we've done together and it makes me feel like a nanny from a brainless sitcom." I crossed my arms while swinging a leg over the other one, tearing my gaze away from Kurt. This was _my_ Sunday. This was _my_ day off from classes and Microsoft word. The day that I could sit around in my pajamas, eat chicken noodle soup, and watch hours upon hours of whatever pleases me at the moment. I had planned to watch a season of Buffy the Vampire Slayer (don't judge me!). Goodbye Buffy, hello Hell.

"Quit being so dramatic. We aren't spying _this_ time. They needed someone to bring them so we came with them. It's not my fault that they're fourteen." Kurt put his arm around my shoulders and pulled me to him. Growl. Why does he have to get physical when we argue? It makes me let down my guard, and it isn't even subconsciously anymore. I knew that he was taming the raging beast inside. Damn that sexy asian.

"Exactly my point! At fourteen I was living in Spain. They could at least go to mall together alone!"

"Yeah, well you're a weird person to begin with." One of the middle school miscreants we were babysitting (Kurt was not going to make me concede on that point) said as he sat down with his tray full of food. This is why I didn't teach middle school miscreants, especially four eyed brats with a saucy attitude.

"Yasuchika! You should be nicer to the people who are giving you a ride or they might make you walk home, and if you have to walk home I have to come with you and that would be really rude of you to make the both of us lose our ride home." The jabberwocky is back! I swear, he took breaths in between words less than Misuzu back at the pension. Not to mention his face was either in a disgustingly bright smile or contorted in some type of warrior expression. These two were wearing me out.

"Satoshi-kun, Chi-kun, shut-up!" Stephanie scolded as she sat down in between the two boys. Here was one girl who had one heck of an attitude, but she held a special place in my heart. It wasn't just that she Kurt's younger sister, it was the fact that she had the ability to put these two boys in their place. Granted the jabberwocky was only annoying because he talked incessantly, while the four-eyed brat was just…a brat. That's pretty much the only word that I can think of to describe him, and I'm a linguist!

"Stephy, don't you think that Yasuchika should be nicer to the people who brought us here and are treating us to lunch?" Satoshi asked, his glare as focused on Yasuchika as his chopstic. He looked like he was about to go grand theft auto on Yasuchika's eyeball. Really I wouldn't complain. It would be entertaining at least. I would be getting some kick-butt action that I was missing in my Buffy marathon. Too bad Yasuchika wasn't a vampire, or this would be like Buffy on Broadway.

"Yes, but I think that you should be nicer to Chi-kun." Well done Stephanie. BURN!

"Did you realize that when you say his name like that it sounds like you are saying the English word for Chicken? I find it amusing." I broke out into my witch cackle, ignoring the fact that the two boys and Kurt were staring at me with bored looks on their faces, "Look, I am here against my will; don't expect me to entertain you too." I blinked at them a few times before letting my head fall forward onto the table and closing my eyes. EHHHHHHH!

"You'll have to excuse, Kate. She is currently working on a dissertation with research focused on high school students. To quote her, 'It's my own personal brand of the passionate fiery flames of death in the lowest circle of hell.' Just leave her alone and she won't bite." I reached over and patted Kurt's leg underneath the table. It was my own personal brand of the passionate fiery flames of death in the lowest circle of hell. Now, those of us who have read Dante's _Inferno_ know that the lowest circle of hell is all ice, which is why I've used it previously to refer to Kyoya's bat-cave, but that is why it makes my hell even more astounding because it only exists for me.

By the way, he should have taken his own advice and left me alone AT HOME! Was it really so hard to give a girl a break? No, no it wasn't. Just because karma was a bitch didn't mean that Kurt had to be one too. Damn, I should have said that out loud.

"How is that going, by the way? You're doing most of the research using that Host club at the high school, right?" Stephanie was the only one on my side here, the only sane one here other than me. I bet she would stay home and watch Buffy the Vampire Slayer with me.

"Speak of the devils." Kurt announced, getting me to lift up my head. Of course, no day or rest would be complete without first being dragged to the mall and second a reunion with a few members of the Host club, including the twins. FML. FML. F. M. L.

"Kate-sempai!" Hikaru and Kaoru slid over to me, the latter of the two squeezing in between Kurt and me. The two of them leaning on the table and looking up at me with those fox faces and demon smiles. Yep. FML.

I watched as Mori and Honey walked to one of the fast food restaurants in the food court and sighed, looking over to where Satoshi and Yasuchika had begun to argue, Stephanie yelling at both of them. I sighed leaning my head on my hands.

"How are classes going you two? I haven't really had the chance to talk to you two." Yes, it was just polite conversation, but that was better than death by twins.

"Hikaru's failing his foreign language class. I told him to take conversational German instead of another year of French." Kaoru sighed, reaching in front of me and grabbing a piece of sushi from my plate.

"Well, Kaoru's failing his math class again." Hikaru responded, reaching around me and smacking his brother on the shoulder. Somehow I thought that I had heard all of this stuff before.

"Neither of us is passing this semester of English Grammar and Usage, though. We basically have to learn everything ourselves. Even Haruhi, Tono, and Kyoya-sempai aren't making A's." The two of them said together, both of them pouting as they wrapped their arms around my waist, leaning their chin's on each of my shoulders.

"Sounds like your new teacher's an idiot." The twins laughed, Kaoru turning towards Kurt whose face was turning purple, "Uh, did I say something?"

"Who would of thought that she would be so out of the loop as this?" Hikaru laughed, slamming his fist on the table, his eyes watering. Out of the loop? Me? What the hell was the damn fox going off about?

"Looks like you're a big idiot, Hisu-sempai!" Hikaru chucled, poking Kurt's cheek with his finger. Ah…so that's what they meant. HAHAHAHAHAHA!

"Why the hell are you teaching English?" I pointed, joining Hikaru and Kaoru in their laughter, throwing my head back and grabbing my gut. Oh that was priceless. Just because someone knew how to speak English and also knew how to teach didn't mean that they could teach English, especially with advanced grammar concepts.

"It's not my fault. You would think that Ouran would be able to hire someone else to teach, but oh no. Hiring new people is way out of an extremely wealthy and dignified school's capability. Really, how hard would it be for a school with the reputation of Ouran Academy to find a new teacher?" Kurt said as he was waving his hands in the air almost as flambouyantly as Tamaki did.

"Yeah, especially since they hired part time teachers to cover all of the other periods during the day." Kaoru said, leaning into me, grinning sadistically at Kurt.

"I'm sorry, Kurt." He just glared at me, obviously not buying my apology. That was smart of him, because as much as I wanted to pity him, I felt worse for the students, "It's not that you are incompetent. You're an awesome teacher, but your grammar sucks like someone trying to drink an extra thick milkshake." I reached around Hikaru and pulled at Kurt's ponytail, earning myself a smoky eyed glare. All I had to do was bat my eyes and that frown would turn upside down.

It was times like these where I enjoyed being in a relationship. Granted the companionship and friendship that we shared was awesome, but it was really nice to be able to pout and get whatever I wanted, or to pout and see the most illuminating smile I had ever seen. It was a good feeling to get what I wanted.

"Chika-chan!" I quickly looked up as I heard Honey's excited voice exclaim. Oh yeah, that's right, Yasuchika was Honey's younger brother. From what Haruhi said when she told me about them, they would probably leap towards one another and try to start a fight in the middle of the busy food court.

"I told you to leave me alone, Mitsukuni. Prepare yourself!" Yasuchika leapt out of his seat and towards the little loli-boy. Yup, totally called it.

"Not in public." Mori's stern voice said, an ankle from each of the Haninozuka brother's in his hand. Honey giggling and smiling stupidly as he swung by the jolly green giant's hand; Yasuchika glaring strait forward and crossing his arms.

"Brother! You are so strong and brave! Yasuchika! You know that you aren't supposed to fight with this many people around, it creates a scene. Yeah the family rule is supposed to come immediately, but you know Uncle wants you and Honey to wait until there are minimal strangers around. Think about what it would do to the Morinozuka and Haninozuka pride if you…"

"Satoshi." Mori had let go of Honey so that the little teenager could climb onto his shoulders again, allowing his free hand to ruffle his brothers, and coincidently shutting him up. Satoshi really was a jabbermouth. I think that his random rants made Mori's silence less annoying and more endearing.

To be honest, all of this should probably surprise me, but after everything that has happened so far it wasn't worth the mental, emotional, and even physical energy to be surprised.

"So what brings you four here?" Stephanie asked, grinning up at Mori and Honey, Honey leaping off of Mori's shoulders to sit next to Stephanie, and Mori moving aside to softly pat Stephanie's shoulder.

"Hika-chan and Kao-chan needed to get a new game so we told them that we would let them ride with us, but we actually came to pick up Chika-chan and Satoshi-chan." Honey grinned from ear to ear as Stephanie threw her arms around him, gathering the loli-boy and Usa-chan into a large hug. Though Kurt's little sister was petite, she was rather tall for someone her age, especially someone Japanese (no offence).

"Hold on a second. Does that mean that we are no longer chaperones and that all we really ever had to do was pick them up and drop them back off?" I growled, turning my head towards Kurt. Hikaru let out a small 'eep' as he ducked underneath my death glare and out from between the two of us.

"Well, uh, technically yes. But it was good for you to get out and away from the house. You needed a day off." Kurt shrugged innocently, his eyes growing wide in his innocence.

"Jerk." I punched him, hard, in the shoulder, grinding my teeth. Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Buffy. I could have been home instead of at the mall. Damn that man. Damn him to hell.

"I guess it's time for us to go get the game. Bye!" Hikaru and Kaoru ran off into the mall. Well done boys, escape while you still can.

"It's time for us to go as well." Mori was saying a lot today, and doing a lot today. I swear that this is a record. It has to be.

"Ah, parting is such sweet sorrow." Kurt sighed, getting up while grabbing my hand and helping me up as well.

"No soup for you, buddy. Just because you use a Shakespeare reference doesn't mean I am going to forgive you from ripping my day of teenagers and vampires away from me." I tore my hand out of his and crossed my arms. I was never going to forgive him for this. This was MY day!

"Technically we have been surrounded by teenagers all day, and if you want me too I could take a little nibble of your neck and show you how much of a vampire I can be." Kurt made his voice as sugary as possible as he leaned his mouth close to my neck.

"Ew. Please get me away from these people." Yasuchika really had such a bratty mouth! Kurt, on the other hand, had a warm and spearminty mouth. Alright, fine, all was forgiven. God I really needed to stop giving into him like this.

"Oh Chi-kun, live and let live. I'll see you Monday in class!" Stephanie grabbed one of Yasuchika's hands and squeezed it, leaning forward and pecking him on the cheek. She turned around and grabbed Satoshi around the middle, squeezing him so hard that if he were a normal person he would have snapped in half.

Both Satoshi and Yasuchika were blushing, and they both turned away with one quick goodbye and began walking out of the food court. Hmn, so that's how it was, was it? I looked up at Mori and Honey, locking eyes with the tall stoic one. So he saw it too. That figures.

See, Kurt really liked invading peoples business from afar, just trying to watch whatever is going on between people. I liked invading peoples business up close and when I know that I've figured something out. I grinned as I followed Stephanie and Kurt to the pick-up truck.

"So, Stephanie, which one do you like?" I said right as the middle school girl was taking a sip from a cup, the contents spewing out all over Kurt's window. I stifled a laugh as I pulled some Kleenex out of the glove compartment and handed it to Stephanie so she could wipe off her coke spit.

"I…umn…I don't know what you're talking about Miss. Kathrin." Stephanie not only stuttered, but she also called me Miss Kathrin instead of Kate.

"Yeah and I don't even want to know what you're talking about."

"This is an A and B conversation so C your way out of it." I reached around Stephanie and flicked Kurt's ear, recoiling my hand slowly and placing it on the teenager's shoulder, turning her towards me slightly, "So, is it Satoshi or Yasuchika? Come on, we're as good as sisters. You can tell me. All I want to do is help."

"Pssht. Yeah right." Stupid man. I smacked him on the shoulder. Why do men always have to think that girl's conversations include manipulation? I swear, Kyoya was _way_ more manipulative than I was, and this was not manipulation…it was bonding.

"Ugh! It's so confusing. The two of them are cousins and best friends, and ever since I met them I tried to tell myself that I wasn't going to fall for one of them." Stephanie's tone was frustrated but an embarrassed kind of frustrated, which clearly meant that she had fallen for one of them.

"Whoa. Can we please not talk about this anymore? You are way too young to…"

"Shut up!" Stephanie and I screamed, both of us smacking Kurt. Really? Now was not the time to play protective older brother.

"It was earlier this year that both of them started showing signs that they liked me. Yasuchika and Satoshi began asking me to go placed alone with them. I had never been alone with either one of them before, and I know for a fact that they barely ever spend time apart. It wasn't until the other week that I found out Yasuchika never knew about the times I went out with Satoshi, and Satoshi never knew about the times I went out with Yasuchika."

"La, la, la, la, la, la!" Kurt got slapped again by the both of us.

"Kurt would you just keep your focus on the road instead of us. Geez, men are horrible when it comes to this stuff." I rolled my eyes in tandem with Stephanie as she shook her head.

"So, anyways," Stephanie continued, smacking Kurt on the leg when he went to make another noise, "I didn't know that they were trying test dates. When I figured it out I made sure that I always invited the other guy along. I was so confused, and then one night we went to the movies and while I was sitting there the two of them tried to hold my hand."

"If you say one word I am going to rip out your tongue. Just drive!" I warned Kurt before he opened his mouth, "So they both had their arms on the arm rest, their palms facing up?" She nodded, "Oldest trick in the book. Either your date consciously puts her hand on yours to hold it, or she doesn't see your open hand and wants to use the arm rest and you get to hold her hand. It's a win-win situation unless your girl is smart enough to realize how male you really are."

"Kate, that's not fair. You can't just judge people like that."

"Kurt, don't even try and debate the point. You did it the first movie we went out to together. You were just lucky that I liked you enough to hold your hand." Stephanie chuckled when Kurt made a show of repositioning his rearview mirror.

"Sorry, Stephanie, that must have been really difficult for you. Being caught between two best friends, and then developing feelings for one of them. In the end you can't deny your heart. If Yasuchika and Satoshi are anything like their brothers, a girl isn't going to come between them."

"I know. I'm pretty sure Satoshi knows how I feel too. He doesn't treat me any differently though, so I know that things between us will be okay." Stephanie flushed.

"So it's Satoshi?" Kurt and I asked at the same time. I looked over at him.

"No, no, no!" Stephanie screamed and waved her hands in front of her, a look of mild repulsion on her face, "I mean that I'm pretty sure that Satoshi knows that I like Yasuchika, and he hasn't stopped being my friend yet. I guess that's a good thing right?"

"You like that little brat?" I was surprised. Stephanie was sweet. Yeah she had the normal attitude of a fourteen year old girl, but she was way less annoying as Yasuchika, and she was not that much of a spoiled brat.

"He may seem like a brat on the outside, but he is really a sweet guy. He always asks me how I am feeling, and he's the only person other than Kurt that I can cry in front of. Chi-kun listens to me and gives really great advice. He's so charming and engaging when we're together." She was smiling that smile, wringing her hands together and looking down at them with those eyes, "I just don't know if I want to say anything yet. Everything is so perfect the way it is. Even if Satoshi suspects that I like Chi-kun, it'll be hard for Satoshi-kun to let go of his feelings for me."

"Stephanie, you shouldn't let worrying about things changing hurt your chance with Yasuchika, even if he is a brat. I think that you should tell him how you feel and go from there. You already know that he has feelings for you; the worst that could happen is that he turns you down. Though, I don't really see that happening." I grabbed her around the shoulders and hugged her to myself, closing my eyes. I never got to have this talk with any of my female friends, and it was the same kind of talk that I would like to have had with my Lily. This felt good.

"No comment from the peanut gallery?" Stephanie asked as she pulled away from me, looking wearily at Kurt.

"I guess my power as your old brother fails when compared with love. So I guess the only thing I have to say is this: Stephanie and Yasuchika kissing in a tree. K. I. S. S. I. N. G. First…"

_Smack. Smack. Smack. Smack._

Stephanie got him good. I laughed aloud as Stephanie crossed her arms and blushed profusely. We pulled into the driveway of Kurt's parent's house and let the teenager go, but not before each of us gave her a hug.

"Do what makes you happy Steph," Kurt said as he kissed his sister on the top of her head, "Just remember that even though Yasuchika has better martial arts skills than me, I will not hesitate to drop kick him if he hurts you."

I chuckled, looking down at the ground and shaking my head. He was such a sweetheart. Annoying and a gossip, but a sweetie.

"You better take Kate's advice to heart too, Kutano Hisugawa." Stephanie poked him in the chest as he leaned over and whispered something in her ear, making her giggle as she waved goodbye and running up the steps and through the door.

"What the hell was that about?" I asked. What did she mean about him taking my advice? He already made his profession of undying affection to me. Meh. It wasn't worth worrying about it anyways.

"Language. Oh, don't forget that I made dinner reservations for tomorrow night at that really nice Hibachi Steakhouse you love so much"

"Shit…take mushrooms. You drag me out today and you expect me to go out with you tomorrow too? You expect too much of me." I cocked my head to the side and looked at him as if I was bored.

"I promise you that we will watch Buffy all day tomorrow until dinner. Besides, you can get the teriyaki shrimp there." I leaned over and kissed him. Hmn. I knew there was a reason why I loved him.

IIIII

Fuck. Remember that story about the princess and the pea. Yeah, well, that princess was me. I hated always being able to tell when something was wrong with my bed, and there was something incredibly wrong with the bed. Kurt was snoring like a foghorn, which was something I had not gotten used to since I was usually asleep when he was dead enough to snore. Fuck trying to sleep when I knew something was wrong with the mattress.

"Where are you you little bugger?" I whispered as I slipped my hand underneath my side of the mattress, feeling around for something out of place. It's a good thing Kurt slept deeper than I did because this movement would wake me up in a heartbeat. I ran my hand underneath the length of my side of the bed, then along the bottom of the bed. Hmn…nothing there.

Shrugging I slipped my hand under the mattress at Kurt's feet and ran my hand alongside the bed.

"Curiouser and curiouser." I whispered, raising my eyebrow at the sleeping man as I grabbed something from underneath where his chest was positioned. Having something hidden under the bed like that would piss me off to no end. I bit my lip…perhaps he was hiding it for a reason? It felt like a box of some sort. I recognized this feeling. I sunk my teeth even further into my lip. Oh look at that, my finger accidently wedged it open. Silly Kathrin.

I moved closer to the window, the moonlight illuminating the….holy shit! Crap. Fuck!

I shoved a finger into my mouth and ran out of the room and into the kitchen, setting the mattress hiding box on the counter and stomping the floor with my feet like a little girl having a temper tantrum. After I had calmed down a little bit I slowly walked to the counter and knelt down so that my eyes were the only thing above the countertop, the green orbs glaring at the shining silver ring with a diamond cut emerald on the top of it.

Without even thinking I reached out and plucked the ring out of the box, placing it on my left hand in its proper place. Holy shit. Holy shit. Holy fucking shit!

I held my hand out. I am sure that if someone saw me right now they would see panic written in my eyes. Okay, calm down Kathrin, calm down. It's just a ring, that's all it is. You can't assume anything, like, engagement ring or anything like that. It's just silly. Stupid. It was only hidden under the side of the bed that your boyfriend sleeps on. It could be anything. Maybe it's for one of his sisters, yeah, that's it. You should take it off now and put it back.

"….SHIT!" I screamed, before covering my mouth with my wrist and biting down, staying still until I knew that I hadn't woken anyone up.

"Language." _Snore_.

"How the hell does he do that? Shut-up, Kate. That's not what's important right now." I reached down to grab the ring off, pulling it off. Pulling it off. Pulling and pulling it off.

"Try running it under some water, idiot."

Right. Good idea. I turned on the faucet and let my fingers run under the cold water for a few seconds before pulling it again. Shit. It's not coming OFF!

"Try some of the Crisco."

Brilliant deduction Watson. Haha, I'm talking to myself even worse than usual. Fuck me sideways. I grabbed the tub of Crisco and pulled some of it out with a spoon, rubbing it on my finger.

"This will work for sure this time! Ready. Set. Pull!" It still wasn't coming off! Kurt was going to kill me! Well, not if he doesn't realize anything. I resigned myself to the fact that I was sooo stupid, and that there was no way out of this pickle I was in as I rinsed off my grease laden fingers, grabbed the case and walked back into the bedroom, moving towards Kurt's side of the bed and stuffing the box underneath the mattress.

I laid my hand on the pillow so that I could look at the ring. It really was beautiful. He was really an amazing guy. How the hell could he love a complete doofus like me? It just was not logical.


	29. Bonus 2: I'm Going to Disneyland

A/N – So after moving back to college and being busy unpacking and hanging out with my roomies, I have brought you all the second bonus chapter. I know everyone was anxious to figure out what is going to happen to Kurt and Kate, and I hope that this chapter does everything justice. Thanks for reading and don't forget to review, review, review!

I'm Going to Disneyland!

_She's a brick – house_

_She's mighty mighty, just lettin' it all hang out_

_Oh She's a brick – house_

_The lady's stack'd, and that's a fact_

_Ain't holding nothing back_

"What is this song?" Kurt grumbled in his half dead, yet extremely sexy, grumble as he reached over me and slammed off my Ipod. Warmth flooded my lips as my Kurt shaped blanket kissed me.

"Your breath tastes horrible, but I love you anyways." I mumbled, deciding that it really wasn't worth it to try and move because I knew that Kurt wouldn't let me out of his grasp now that he had me pinned down.

"Believe me, Kate; your breath doesn't taste like roses either." He leaned down for another kiss. Apparently morning breath had no effect on him. I opened my eyes, only to stare into two lucid pools of gray.

"Good Morning," I was growing soft in my old age, especially since after I gave him that morning greeting I giggled, and was still giggling. Something had obviously come over me. Could it be the way his long black hair feathered down past his shoulders and lighted upon my neck, could it be the fact that his eyes were like smoke, could it be the fact that we were completely in love with one another and silly things like reeking breath weren't going to bother us, or could it be the fact that I was such a girl and was completely taken with the fact that I had a ring on my finger. Probably the latter. I twisted the ring with my thumb, keeping it hidden under the covers.

I wasn't going to tell him my find. He would have to figure it out on his own. Besides, the damn ring was not coming off, both literally and figuratively. I am such a girl!

"I have to take care of some business for Hotaru and Dad today. I'll be back to pick you up for dinner." Ooof. Why did he think it was okay to roll over me in order to get off the bed on my side? Yeah it was closer to the closet but, shit, he was in shape enough to walk around.

"Yeah. Haruhi is coming over this afternoon anyway. I told her that we would plan the inevitable doom of the Host club." Kurt just laughed at me, knowing that I would never plot the demise of the Host club because 1) those boys meant a lot to me, oddly enough, and 2) I needed them for my dissertation. What was it that Kyoya said to Haruhi at the mall? _There's no better motivator than self interest_.

"Kate, could you, uh, maybe…"

"You don't need to ask me twice." I rolled my eyes and got out of bed, walking over to Kurt and lacing up his tie for him, receiving a peck on the forehead as payment. He would be completely lost without me, "Do you want me to make you a sandwich or something before you leave? It's already eleven."

"Don't worry about it. I'll pick something up on my way to pick up Hotaru." I followed him from the bedroom into the living room, standing on my tiptoes to give him a farewell kiss before watching him leave.

This morning was just the beginning. I looked down at the ring, which he was too much in a hurry to notice. It wasn't as if the ring changed anything because this is how we acted with one another all the time, but it was kind of like a contract. Like the song.

"Signed, sealed, delivered, I'm yours!" I sang, doing the conga back to the bedroom and slipping some pajama pants over my shorts and throwing on my Stanford sweatshirt, bopping my way back into the kitchen and pulling open the refrigerator, leaving it in the open position as I stared at my left hand a sit curled around the door handle. I am SUCH a fucking girl!

"Kate-sensei! Help me!" Haruhi's stifled yell came from outside the door. I quickly ran and opened the door, Haruhi shooting past me. I raised an eyebrow and looking outside of the door, forcing back laughter as I saw Tamaki and the Twins running at full speed towards my house, "Shut the door!" I obeyed and slammed the door shut, locking both the door and the bolt.

"What the hell is going on? It's like the great Haruhi inquisition or something." I turned to the panting teenage girl. She looked so cute even when she was practically dying of asphyxiation. Why couldn't I look that cute?

"I don't know. One minute I was walking over here and the next I heart Tamaki-sempai screaming at me. I don't even know what I was thinking; I just ran." Haruhi walked into the kitchen and got herself a glass, moving to the sink and filling it up with water.

"You don't have to explain anything. If I was being chased by those three I would have run from them too. In fact, I'm pretty sure that I would have sprayed them with mace." I looked out of the peep hole on the door and saw the three boys congregated at the edge of the driveway, the twins listening to Tamaki intently, nodding every so often.

"You're not going to be able to keep them out long, Kate-sensei. I was just looking for a nice, quiet day at home, but then Dad said that I was coming over here, and once I left my house I was followed by those three. It's not even noon yet and I'm exhausted." Haruhi's Dad was the one who asked if I would spend time with her today while he was at work. I really didn't understand his reasoning for this, but I wasn't going to complain. Besides, Haruhi had texted me yesterday to ask me to help her with some Grammar work.

"Are you hungry? I was planning on making some chicken pesto pasta for myself. It would be easy for me to make a double portion." Haruhi nodded, setting the glass down on the counter and walking towards the window.

"Ahhhh!"

"Is that supposed to be a ye…AHHHH!" Stupid, creepy, insane twins! Shit. Haruhi backed up into me, slamming me into the armrest of the couch and vaulting me over it, "Ooofff" The teenager was now on top of me, her nose poking me awkwardly in the belly button. Awkwardly.

"I'm sorry, Kate-sensei," Her voice was garbled by my shirt. I could hear a twin chorus of snickers from outside the window. I had obviously seen the same thing that Haruhi had seen when she went to the window: two identical pairs of amber eyes just peaking over the windowsill, their fox-like hair sticking up menacingly. The surprise obviously freaked us out enough to lead us to where we were now.

Good grief! Just when you think the day was going so well it was if you were walking on a cloud, something (these boys, always these boys) drags you back down to earth.

_Knock, knock, knock._

"Haruhi, please let us in. Daddy just wants to talk to you about something! I promise that these doppelgangers won't hurt you." Tamaki's muffled princely voice traveled through the doorway. I felt the pressure on my torso lift as Haruhi sat up, sighing and glaring down at the floor. She looked like she was going to castrated something, something named Tamaki. I sighed, standing up and walking towards the door, opening it and shutting it before any of the boys could weasel their way inside.

"You've got to be kidding me? Couldn't you just call her like a normal friend would and talk to her there? Why did you have to chase her here?" I flicked Tamaki in the nose, ignoring the 'Ame-sempai's so violent!' and walking over to the twins, placing my hands on my hips, tapping my foot on the concrete. Shit, I felt like such a mom right now. No joke.

"Don't ask us Kate-sempai," Kaoru said, crossing his arms and leaning into his brother.

"Tono had something to tell Haruhi, and we decided that we wanted to see Haruhi too," Hikaru crossed his arms and leaned back into Kaoru. I gave them a lingering dirty look.

"Why the hell did you guys have to follow me here?" Haruhi slammed the door open, her shoulders heaving in frustration. I snickered as Tamaki whispered, 'she's so angry she cursed at us!' and crossed my arms, waiting for the response.

"We have something to tell you too!" Both of the twins leapt forward and each one wrapped a hand around one of Haruhi's wrists, dragging her a few feet away from me. Tamaki looked around like a confused puppy for a few seconds before running away to join them. Eh, clearly I was not awesometastic enough to gain such information as they wanted to bestow. Pssssht. Fine, see if I fucking care.

I began to busy myself in the kitchen making lunch, trying to ignore the fact that, knowing the three boys outside, they were going to kidnap Haruhi or something like that. If that happened, Ranka would have my head on a silver platter, and Haruhi would be in deep shit. No one likes being kidnapped by the Host club. It's frightening even being in the same room with them at times.

"Kate-sensei, I have to leave. Tamaki-sempai got Dad and me tickets to a Kabuki performance tonight." Haruhi came inside, her voice attempting to stay calm and collected, "Mom and Dad used to go to Kabuki when Mom won a big case." Her small smile betrayed her emotions. Well done, Tamaki, well done.

"Come on, hurry up! We have to get you ready for tonight!" The fox voices yelled, a hand reaching through the door and pulling Haruhi out of it. Really…really? I sighed and turned, shaking my head. These boys were so demanding! I really did feel sorrier for Haruhi than myself. At least I had someone sane like Kurt in my life. Hmmm…scratch that bit about sanity.

"At least I'm alone though." I reached into the fridge and pulled out some leftover white rice from the night before, plopping it in the microwave and pulling out a fork. Don't judge me. Just because I can use chopsticks and I live in Japan doesn't mean I needed to use them. In fact, I preferred using a fork. Call me an ignorant American; I don't give a crap.

The hum of the microwave was giving me a headache. A lot of things were giving me headaches these past few days. I looked down at the ring on my finger. Knowing my luck it was a gift for his mother or one of his sisters, or he was holding it for a friend who he had that I didn't know about. Kurt had to have friends, right? Besides Hotaru that is. Shaking my head and turning on the first episode of Buffy where it had left off yesterday before I was dragged, kicking and screaming, to the mall. My friends were all teenagers. How pathetic.

"_Very suave. Very not pathetic._" Thank you Xander Harris, thank you for echoing all of my sentiments of patheticness. I stuck my tongue out at the TV and grabbed my bowl of rice from the microwave, slamming the door of the appliance closed in more of a show of frustration than needed to be publicized.

"But really, what harm would it hurt if this really was a ring for me? Honestly, I deserve something pretty from the man that I want to spend my entire life with." Shittastic shiitake mushrooms! Did I really just say that out loud? I loved Kurt, it was true, but I…I…

"I'm so confused!" I screamed to the ceiling, setting my bowl of rice on the floor and curling up on the couch, pulling down the blanket from the back of the couch and snuggling into it, pouting.

IIIII

"Kate, wake up before your drool permanently stains the couch." Soft hands brushed hair from my face and I opened my eyes to see Kurt looking down at me with his sweet smile.

"I wasn't drooling, pervert." I leaned up to kiss him on the cheek before swinging my legs off the couch and propelling myself into a sitting position, stretching my back out once I was standing.

"Pervert? What about that makes me a pervert?" Ahh! Bear hug attack from behind! I was turned around in his arms, forced to gaze into his eyes as he pulled up my chin with his hand.

"What about watching me sleep _doesn't _make you a pervert or, at the very least, a creepy stalker?"

"You knew I was a creepy stalker the first time we met. Remember?" As if for emphasis he grabbed my hand and began twirling me around in circles. Dancing in the middle of the living room with him was so horribly cliché. Too cliché, "Ouch! Don't pinch me!"

"You deserved it. Shut-up or next time I'll slap you on the ass."

"Language." I looped my arms around his neck. This man was infuriating sometimes. 'Ass' was not that bad of a word. Seriously."

"Honestly, can't you just accept that my vocabulary contains cursing?" I grabbed his ties and pulled his face towards mine.

"'Foul words are but foul wind, and foul wind is but foul breath, and foul breath is noisome; therefore I will depart unkissed." Kurt turned away from my lips and turned towards the bathroom, loosening the tie on his neck as he left. He was not going to get away with that. Hell to the no!

"You did NOT just use Shakespeare against me. Me!" _Much Ado About Nothing_ was not my favorite play, but it was my favorite of the comedies. How dare he use my beloved Bard against me! I pushed him away from the dresser and shoved him onto the bed, launching myself on top of him like a panther, "Never use Shakespeare against me Kutano Hisugawa unless you want to die prematurely."

"Doesn't sound too bad if it's the literary definition of death you told me about before." Kurt was being saucy today. He slipped his hands up my back and under my shirt. I just leaned down to give him a kiss and leapt of the bed. Yup. Total cock block right now. Mwahahaha. I'm so evil.

"Come on Kurt, we need to get ready for dinner. Food. Food! FOOD!" I looked through my clothes, trying to find something perfect to wear tonight, running my hand along the satin green dress I had worn the night Kurt and I met. If we were going to a dance I would have worn this, but as we were not, the other, shorter, green dress that matched my eyes (and the ring cough cough) perfectly would have to do.

"You are such a shameless glutton." Kurt stood next to me near the closet, taking off the white business shirt that he had been wearing and replacing it with a mild rose colored long sleeve shirt and a black vest. I turned him towards me and helped him button up the vest, "But I wouldn't have you any other way."

Awww…so fucking cliché, but so fucking amazing! Bwahahaha! Was this how every girl felt when she was with the man of her dreams on probably one of the best days of her life? Okay, so what, I am a girl. I have needs, and I've always dreamed about living together happily. I have dreamed about the day of an engagement, and I have dreamed about a wedding dress. Did I ever think it was going to have any of these things…no. Was I excited that I was going to be able to be a complete girl…fuck yea!

"Kate, I have to drop off some papers before dinner. Are you okay with that? You can drive if you want." Kurt threw me the keys as we were on our way out of the door. Hold up…I could drive the precious beat up pick-up truck? Me? Woohoo! I grabbed the keys and dangled them in his face, grinning as I hopped outside and skipped to the car. Dude, little kid much? "You may need to stop and get gas, Kate."

"Fill me up partner!" I snickered as I got behind the wheel and moved up the seat because I am 5'1 and have short legs. Kurt chuckled at the fact that I needed to move his seat all the way up. I smacked him. Stupid tall people that think they can rule the world, "Fill this truck up good and full."

"That's what she said."

"Touché, Hisugawa, Touché." How the hell did he always come up with the good ones? Every single time I said something mildly funny he was able to make it into one of the most satisfying and sensical that's what she said jokes ever. "Those jokes are so highly overdone, but every time you do it tickles my funny place."

"Ha. That's what she said!"

"Touché, Hisugawa, Touché…again." I was dying of laughter, smacking the steering wheel over and over again as I parked, continuing to die while Kurt got out of the car to fill up his tank. Dear God, Baby Jesus I love this man!

IIIII

"I didn't think, when you asked me to come with you to drop off the papers, that we would get stuck in the elevator. Talk about a cruel twist of fate." Yes, exactly, there go our dinner reservations. There goes our nice time together. The clichéness of the moment was now beginning to outweigh the clicheness of the fact that it was possible I was going to be proposed to.

"Don't get mad at me. How was I supposed to know that someone was going to pull the fire alarm and stop the elevators right as we were getting into them? How was I supposed to know that no one would be in the building because it's after hours? How was I supposed to know that I don't get signal in this elevator, and how was I supposed to know that the stupid security guard would be away from his or her desk and not see the blinking red light alerting them to call for help?" Kurt had his hand on his neck. Clearly he was angry, so I just slipped my hand into his in order to stop him from leaving a mark and snuggled into his left side.

"I'm not mad; I just think it's funny. Believe me, there is no one else I'd rather be stuck in an elevator with. Hey, do you think it would be fun to have sex in an elevator?" He looked over at me and gave me the 'did you really just go that far?' glance before smiling and kissing my nose.

"I'm just mad because I was planning something special tonight." Kurt curled his bottom lip into a pout and looked at the ground, drawing circles on the cold linoleum with his finger. He kind of reminded me of the way Tamaki looks when he is sulking in his corner, except it was way more pathetic when the Host club king did it, meaning that I actually did feel bad for Kurt instead of laughing at how pathetic the sulking really was.

"Well, we are here together. Just because we're stuck in an elevator that smells like nasty gym socks doesn't mean that the time we are spending together isn't special," Gag. I must be really desperate to figure out Kurt's true intentions with the ring that was conveniently placed underneath my thigh so that he wouldn't see it. Speaking of the ring, it had been on my hands all day and no one had noticed…how thick could you get?

"I kind of getting the feeling that you are in a rare happy-go-lucky mood right now, because normally you would be freaking out and cursing up a storm." Kurt was mocking me. It was okay because that was really how I wanted to act; however, this situation just seemed way too priceless to let slip by in anger or frustration

Kurt pulled his hand from mind and dipped both hands into his vest pockets, concealing something in each of his hands, which he place behind his back, "Pick a hand."

He was so cute! I grinned and pointed towards his right hand. He pulled it out and revealed two thin pieces of paper. Damn it…not what I was expecting.

"Disneyland Tokyo. I am sure that you are missing home, and you've been watching more of your American movies and TV shows lately, so I figured that I would take you to the happiest place on earth."

"What's in your other hand?" Come on, Kate. Give it up already. It was just stupid Disneyland tickets, and not even Disneyland in California tickets, Disneyland Tokyo tickets. How was a Japanified Disneyland going to make me not miss home even more? Actually…that was pretty damn awesome. I loved Disneyland and going to the happiest place on earth in the place that made me feel the happiest I've ever felt would be like heaven on earth. Kurt was still cute.

"I'm glad you asked. I want us to have the best time we possibly can at that amusement part because it will be nice for you to have a break from everything, but I also don't think I could have a good time unless I was already incredibly happy before going. So, in order to make me the most incredibly happy man alive, I would love it if you, Kathrin Joy Amendier," He grabbed my hand and pulled it to the left side of his chest. I could feel his heart pumping rapidly beneath his chest, BAHHHHHH! I knew it! I totally fucking new it! , "would consent to becoming my wife, making this heart the happiest place on earth."

"Absitively Posolutely." I grinned, pushing myself onto my knees and launching myself towards Kurt, kissing him. I knew the ring was for me. Ah…the ring. Crap.

"Good, you can have this now." Kurt pulled his other hand from behind his back and opened the empty case, his face falling when he noticed that the case was actually empty, "What the fuck…uh…I mean…crap."

"Language, Kutano Hisugawa, language please." I giggled as he blushed a very deep crimson, the empty ring box falling to the floor so that he could slam his mouth closed with both of his hands, "By the way, I think you're looking for this." I flashed my left hand, watching his grey eyes widen when he saw the ring on my finger, "You're a poor judge of ring sizes because I tried everything to get this off and it still wouldn't budge."

"Ha…hahaha…HAHAHA," His river-like laugh blasted in the elevator as he grabbed my hand and squeezed, brushing through my hair with his other hand that was shaking so badly because he was laughing so hard. I would not have had this moment any other way. This was perfect, simply perfect.

"So, Kutano Hisugawa," I leaned over and kissed his still chortling lips, "Now that you're engaged to the most amazing woman in the world, what are you going to do next?" I said, baiting the hook well and, if I knew the fantastic man before me as well as I thought I did, he would bite.

"Well, Kathrin soon-to-be-Hisugawa, I'm going to Disneyland!"


	30. Bonus 3: One, Two, Three, Four, I

One, Two, Three, Four, I Declare a Thumb War

"MOMMA! Do something! She's stealing all of our customers!"

"Tamaki, shouldn't you be enjoying the fact that the hosts get a break today. Besides, the club is still earning money while she is here. Just enjoy it."

Tamaki had been going at it since the beginning of the Host clubs meeting today. I actually was getting some good data today, especially since all of the girls were surrounding me with their expectant eyes instead of the Host club boys. Well, the girls, Haruhi, the twins, and Honey, all looking at me with their expectant eyes. This would do wonders for my dissertation as I could explore how certain circumstances will make certain archetypes less fascinating when compared to them. Besides, girls will be girls.

"So then what did he say?" Renge asked, her huge pink bow seemingly twisting into horns, "This is getting a spot in Moe Moe Ouran Diaries!"

"So I said, 'Well, Kutano Hisugawa, now that you're engaged to the most amazing woman in the world, what are you going to do next?' and he said…"

"I'm going to Disneyland!" The girls and various Host club members screamed, finishing my story for me. This was probably the fifteenth time I'd told this story to these girls, always starting over again when a new guest came to the Host club. Of course all of the girls didn't mind hearing it over again, even Haruhi seemed completely enthralled with the story.

"Oh that's so romantic!" One of the twincest fangirls with short black hair said, her eyes longingly gazing up at the ceiling, her hands clasped in front of her, "I wish it would happen to me!" I grinned, all of the girls turning around and chattering.

"That's such a beautiful story. I'm touched." Hikaru and Kaoru were blowing their noses simultaneous as the spoke, their eyes glistening with tears.

"I just don't understand it Kyoya," Tamaki began again. I could hear him whine from the spot he was in behind me, "How can she comes in and steal away our customers like this. She's here all the time!"

"Moron." Kyoya replied tartly. I watched him walk from where he had been standing behind me with Tamaki and over to his laptop, irritated clicking the keys of the keyboard. Sometimes I wondered how he could deal with Tamaki at all.

"Tamaki-sempai, girls like hearing stories about how people get engaged, especially when it's someone they know. I though you would be right up front with Hika…"

"Ame-sempai's engaged!" He was such an idiot, "Ame-sempai, please tell me the story! Please!" The princely amethyst eyes were now in front of me, begging. I looked up, making eye contact with Kyoya and Haruhi who had walked over to join the shadow king. Both of their eyes saying, "I can't believe he really is this stupid."

So, I told the story again. The girls all chimed in at parts, the twins began crying afresh, and Honey had somehow wormed up onto the couch next to me.

"Ame-san, can I ask you a question." Honey's sweet voice asked from beside me. He looked just like a little kid who was going to ask for something he knew he wasn't supposed to have, but those big brown eyes were rather hard to resist, "Can we come to Disneyland with you?"

IIIII

"You said, 'yes'!" Kurt slapped his hands onto the counter while I washed the dishes from dinner. I was expecting this.

"Look, I couldn't resist! Honey's eyes were just so expectant, and he was holding Usa-chan all cutely. Before I knew it everyone was coming with us! Well, everyone except Haruhi. Even Kyoya's coming. He got the group rate if they bought six tickets, so he had to come along too to get the discount." I kept my eyes down at the sink, not wanting to look up at the smoldering eyes of Kurt. If I did look at him I was sure that it would be akin to looking into the eyes of medusa. I would turn into stone, and then I would fall against the tile floor and shatter into a bazillion pieces.

"Since when can you not resist Mitsukuni? You're usually the first one to roll your eyes at his boyishness." Kurt had somehow moved behind me and seized me around the waist, forcing me to look up at least, his hot breath on my neck. I turned around and let my eyes growl at him for me until he backed off.

"Look. I am a woman. I do have _some_ maternal instinct. It was like my own little boy was asking me to take him to the park or something." I stuck out my tongue and reached forward, wiping off my wet hands on Kurt's shirt, taking off at a sprint before he caught me, and running up the stairs to my library.

"Kate. I have no problem with the fact that you invited them. I love my students, but I'm just worried about your mental health. Are you sure you can deal with them?" He asked as I heard his feet thunk up the stairs, situating myself on the other side of the papasan chair, making the piece of furniture the barrier between us.

"I'll be fine. At least Kyoya is semi-sane." I tensed, ready to make a break for it. Kurt may be a sexy Asian, and he may have ninja like qualities, but I would not let him catch me.

"True." Kurt bolted around the furniture and tried to grab my arm, but I had put my own ninja skills to the test and knew his moves before he made them. Wax on, wax off!

"Everybody was kung-fu fighting. Hyyyya! Those cats were fast as lightning. Hyyyya!" I sang, running around the papasan chair, dodging Kurt's attempts to grab at me, "Ha! Little white girls can move, beeyatch!"

"Language." I turned around, Kurt had suddenly disappeared. Fucking ninja man. How does one person disappear in a small room surrounded by bookcases?

"I can't say beeyatch? That's not even a real…" I was attacked from the back, forced to the ground by a huge Japanese man, my body smashed into the carpet.

"Uh…oh…" Automatically we were on mind meld as I started sliding down the stairs as if it were a slip-n-slide, Kurt practically on top of me as if I were a sled. If seemed like an eternity before we reached the bottom floor, "An object in motion will stay in motion." Kurt groaned, getting off of me and uttering his own painful gasps.

"Now's not the time to apply physics to it. I think I got a rug burn on my boobs." My chest seemed like it was on fire. I didn't even know that that could happen. I flipped over, spreading out my arms as if I were dead, "I'm never playing crouching tiger, hidden dragon with you again, Kutano Hisugawa." I groaned, when he plopped down on the floor, his hands on either side of my head and his legs straddling my waist. Damn, I had a bad feeling about this.

"Well you know Kate, you're pretty good at being a crouching tiger, and I do have a hidden dragon." What the hell was he talking about? Crouching tiger…hidden dragon…

"Ewwww! You nasty pervert!" I pushed him off of me and got up, running into the bedroom and slamming the door. I heard his roarous laughter from outside of the room.

IIIII

"Disneyland! Disneyland! Woohoo, Disneyland!" Hikaru and Kaoru sang as they galloped in step with one another off of the tram and towards the entrance to Disneyland Tokyo.

"Buraahhahahha!" Honey screamed as he took off running after the twins, Mori slowly walking after him, his single steps almost equaling Honey's at running speed.

The tram ride itself was already an adventure in itself. The twins, Honey, and Tamaki had sat there, practically holding their breath on the tram while Mori said nothing, though he seemed a bit more excited than he normally seemed. Then again, was Mori ever excited? It was amusing watching the four happy teenagers nearly turn blue, and now we were here, and currently being ditched by those five teenagers already going through the gates and waving absurdly at us. I think I saw a few people stare through the entrance gate at us with annoyed and confused glances.

"Can't we sell this ticket to someone else?" Kyoya asked me, holding his Disneyland ticket between his pointer and middle fingers in front of my eyes. I just shrugged my shoulders, about to say something when Kurt burst through the two of us, quickly getting in line, going through the gate, and joining the still waving teenagers on the other side of the entrance.

"Miss Amendier, if we make a run for it now the idiots may not notice." I linked my arm through Kyoya's and practically dragged his near dead weight towards the gate with me, ignoring his uncharacteristically uncool grumbles. I was so going to tell every Kyoya fangirl about this when I got that chance.

"Now that everyone is here it's time to come up with a plan of attack men!" Tamaki yelled, pumping his fist into the air before leaning over and setting his hands on his knees. All I could see was a Quarterback trying to make a play when it was 4th at the goal line at the end of the fourth quarter. I stood back, my arms crossed, looking at the planning boys superiorly. By boys, I also mean Kurt because upon arriving at the Disneyland grounds he had regressed to a ten year old level of excitement and intelligence.

"Boys, boys, boys, I don't think I can listen to this squabbling any longer." I interrupted in my smoothest voice as I grabbed the park map that I grabbed on my way in from my back pocket, opening it to reveal arrows leading from the park entrance towards Tomorrowland, "You are all wondering how I could have mapped our entire day in only a few minutes. Well, this is the fool-proof Amendier plan for Disneyland. Though it has only been tested in Disneyland back in the states; I am certain that my plan there will work just as fluidly as it does in the U.S. of A. for it is most assuredly fool-proof."

Yes boys, bow at my amusement park prowess. I was so damn fantastic that even Kyoya was leaning towards the map (Hikaru and Kaoru had ripped it out of my hands) and was eyeing the plan.

"Well, Miss Amendier," He righted himself and pushed up his glasses, "It had better be fool-proof because we sure have enough fools to test it on." I grinned, rubbing my hands together sinisterly. If Kyoya was down with the plan, then it was time to get it on!

"So, boys of the Ouran High School Host Club, your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to make your way to Space Mountain. Who's with me?" I borrowed Tamaki's fist pump, much to Kyoya's dismay, a grin on my face as everyone cheered.

"I knew there was a reason I asked you to marry me." Kurt grabbed my hand, pecked me on the cheek, and we were off, speed walking in our mob of gorgeousness towards the land where Tomorrow lives! We weaseled our way through the crowds, Kyoya tailing the group, his arms still crossed in boredom.

"Does Tamaki look like he has had one too many shots of coffee this morning?" I asked Kurt as I watched the blond prince practically jitter his way to the line in his excitement. The twins were about as jumpy. It surprised me that no conversation between the boys was going on, but they all looked like they were suffering from heroin withdrawal, possibly prompting the lack of vocalization.

"I have no idea what you're talking about." Kurt looked down at me. Damn, Disneyland had taken over my fiancé. AHHH! Fiancé! Ahhh! Sorry. Had to get that out of the way.

"Why is everyone here truly impossible?" Kyoya grumbled as he passed me, getting in line and whacking Tamaki on the head with a closed fist when the blond prince nearly ran into a metal railing in his exuberance.

"Tama-chan just gets excited about these things Kyo-chan, right Takashi?" Honey said sweetly.

"Yeah." Mori's grunted reply came as expected, and Honey climbed upon the giant's back. It must be nice to look and act so much like a kid that you can get away with stuff like that. If I desired to climb onto Kurt's back people would look at me like I was an immature teenager. As I am a mature and sophisticated woman, that would be beyond my status. Bahaha. I kill me sometimes.

"Honey, I actually am curious about something. Are you sure you'll be able to ride these rides? You're tall enough right." I asked, just posing the observation. Well…he _was_ incredibly short for a 17yr old.

"You have no room to talk." Mori said, looking down at me with a smile before laying his overly large hand on my head. Did I catch a note of emotion? I chuckled out loud, leaning back into Kurt's arms, feeling his chest pulse in laughter beneath my head.

"This line is taking forever. We're bored." Well that didn't take too long. Hikaru and Kaoru were each leaning on the metal railing next to them, their legs crossed, and extremely bored looks on their faces. Not changing their position and walking backwards when the line moved forward.

"We've only been in line five minutes. Chill your roll." I said, unlatching myself from Kurt's arms and moving over to the twins, poking them both in the stomach, making them collapse around their middles, "Do something to entertain yourself."

"Hey Tono, let's play a game." I rolled my eyes towards the sky, folding myself back into Kurt's arms as I watched Hikaru and Kaoru enclose around Tamaki whose childlike grin had begun fade into an expression of curiosity. I can't believe that idiot fell for it every single time.

"Kyoya! You be the referee!" Tamaki squealed once the twins declared their plan to him.

"If I must." Kyoya sighed, leaning back on the railing, his arms still crossed. Talk about Mr. Grumpy Gills. I swear, if Medusa had a twin brother it would be Kyoya Ootori. Yeah he was a nice guy. I remembered going with Kurt to the Ootori's home and watching Kyoya act like a normal sixteen year old boy around his best friend, but I was beginning to think twice about my Kyoya equals biscuit theory.

"Go Hika-chan and Kao-chan." Honey yelled, drawing way too much attention to us. Damn these heathens!

"Hey! Honey-sempai!" Tamaki's voice revealed complete and utter betrayal as the twins counted off, "No fair!" That's cheating." Tamaki was slow to react as the twins made their attack. If this were any other time in my life I would probably try and stop them from making complete imbeciles of themselves, but there was a point where you just couldn't attempt stopping that from happening. Once an idiot, always an idiot.

"I'm pretty sure that this is the most epic thumb-war I've ever witnessed in my life. I'm surprised you aren't stopping them; I'm surprised you aren't embarrassed." Kurt pushed me off of him so that he could wrap his arm around my waist and look down at me at the same time, one eyebrow raised.

"Look. I feel strangely calm for some reason. Perhaps this place is really magical." I looked over at the twins, both of whom had somehow twisted Tamaki around so that he was pressed up against a wall and his arms were tweaked in a very awkward and possibly painful position. Tamaki was managing to keep his thumbs away from Hikaru and Kaoru's before he kicked off of the wall, twirling his trunk around, and forcing both of the twins into the position he was in before, "Or it could be the fact that this is one kick ass thumb-war."

Kurt shrugged and nodded, averting his attention to the dueling trio as Tamaki laughed in victory.

"WOW, Tama-chan! That was amazing!" Honey yelled as the twins both grabbed one another's wrists, dramatic tears streaming down their faces as they both yelled, "Honey-sempai! I thought you were on our side!" towards the loli-boy who just smiled and hugged Usa-chan even tighter. The twins turned a homicidal glance towards Tamaki who let out a yelp of fear.

"The line's moving. Let's go." Mori said, grabbing each of the twins in their own separate headlock and, with them in tow, closed the gap that had formed in front of us in line. I stifled a giggle since the twins still looked murderous, and I didn't want to be their victim.

"Shoot me now," Kyoya whispered close to my ear as we moved. He had moved his hands from their guarded position across his chest and placed them in his back pockets. His face was nearly undistinguishable from the normal shadowed expression, but I could tell that there was _something_ different. Not like he would say shit about what he was really feeling. I really shouldn't talk though since I kind of had the same problem.

"But I want to sit by Ame-san!" Honey's childlike voice said, the large brown eyes tearing up as he looked at Kurt who, unbeknownst to me, had sidled up to the side Kyoya wasn't occupying, lacing his fingers in mine.

"Honey-sempai! That's not fair!" Hikaru and Kaoru rounded on Honey, both of them coming up to me and latching themselves around my waist, pushing Kurt and Kyoya away. I didn't know that I was so damn awesometastic. I figured that the seating arrangements for all of the rides would be fairly self explanatory. Mori and Honey were always together, so were Hikaru and Kaoru. Kyoya and Tamaki were best friends (the logistics for that still escaped me), and Kurt and I were engaged. Wow, that still feels weird to think about. Why the hell was I so popular?

"Kurt," I whispered, "Say something dammit."

"Language, Kathrin." I slapped him in the stomach. Good. I hope you bit your tongue you fucking idiot. Ha. I will curse just as much as I want, when I want, and how I want!

"I have an idea! Why don't we fight for the privilege?" Tamaki pounded a fist into his palm while winking.

"And you made me come with these morons why?" The Shadow King was by my side again as the rest of the Host club and Kurt circled up, all of them beginning to chant 'one, two, three four, I declare a thumb war'…even Mori. E-ven-Mo-ri!

"Kyoya, I made you come with these morons to keep me company so that I don't take a trip down imbecile lane." We both let out an exasperated breath as we continued to inch forward in line. The twins were out first. Then Tamaki and Mori. Then Kurt. I was disappointed in the fact that my fiancé was not man enough to win a thumb war on my behalf. Whatever happened to being able to protect the woman you love? Honestly. If we were living in some tribal or Viking culture some other extremely hairy, burly, smelly man would have been able to legally throw me over his shoulder and take me home. Then again, since it was Honey who won, I don't think that any of those things actually apply, and being thrown over the shoulder of someone who resembled a ten year old would not be on my bucket list for sure.

"Kyo-chan! It looks like the battle's between us!" Honey jumped in front of Kyoya who released another sigh.

"Must I?" Kyoya looked down at the loli-boy who was practically dancing in wait, glaring up at the Shadow King with his large brown eyes and a quivering lip, "Oh, alright." Kyoya was putting absolutely no effort in the match, and I knew that Honey would probably win considering he was a martial arts master.

"Ouuuuuchhhhhhiiiii!" Honey's shrill yell made everyone around us direct their eyes towards the small boy and Kyoya, "Takashi!" Honey leapt up onto Mori's back, holding out his thumb which was completely red.

"It's just a cramp. It'll be better soon." Mori's flat voice explained as he took Honey's hand in his own and began rolling the wounded thumb between his fore and middle fingers despite Honey's protests.

"I guess this means that Kyoya-sempai" Kaoru began.

"Gets to sit with Kate-sempai." Hikaru finished, both of them creating one Siamese twin shrug and turning around, inching further and further to the boarding platform. Speaking of the boarding platform…I completely missed that we were so close to actually being on the first ride of the day.

"If I must." Kyoya was completely apathetic about this. Hell, he better be pleased to sit his stuck up ass next to my amazingness. Then again, I wasn't exactly thrilled to be sitting with anyone other than Kurt, especially when that 'anyone' happened to be Kyoya Ootori.

The next few minutes were awkward. Really awkward. Incredibly awkward. I kept glancing at Kyoya who seemed to be as cool as possible. The two of us were in the back of the group. At least I was half right in the pairings that I had foreseen for today's foray into the happiest place on earth. The twins were sitting together, and so were Honey and Mori. Kurt was in deep conversation with Tamaki about the best way to ride a roller coaster: raise your hands in the air the entire way, scream obnoxiously, or do both simultaneously.

"Row One." The ride technician told Kyoya and me when we got to the front of the line, meaning that we were going to be in the front row with the rest of the Host club behind us.

"Don't forget to take off your glasses." I reminded Kyoya who rolled his eyes at me, I think, as he took off his glasses and placed them in his pocket, gripping onto the safety bar tightly.

Like all good rides it was over before it began. With complete darkness while the ride was going, I could barely make out anything, and I couldn't even really hear the music over the shrill screams coming from Tamaki, Hikaru, and Kaoru, the loud roars coming from Kurt and, surprisingly, Mori., and the gleeful laughing scream coming from Honey. Kyoya didn't make a sound. Cool even when riding a ride at Disneyland. What a killjoy!

"WOOOOHOOOO!" Four of the Host club boys…three guesses who, leapt out of the car and began running out the exit as soon as the safety bars released, followed closely by Kurt and Mori who both ended up talking about G-forces. Yeah, I know, Mori was actually carrying on a full conversation. Disneyland really was a magical world.

I began following them, attempting to catch up when I saw Kyoya pause by the wall for a second and lean against it.

"Hey, Kyoya, are you alright? You aren't afraid of roller coasters are you?" I stopped and looked up into his eyes. The black haired teenager remained silent, standing up on his own, grabbing his glasses out of his pocket, and following the mob off people exiting the ride. Shaking my head I jogged to catch up to Kyoya, placing my hand on his shoulder once I caught up, "Hey. I asked you a question."

"I am not afraid of them; I just do not particularly like them." I noticed a small quiver in his voice, but decided not to ignore it, thinking that he was probably lying in order to keep up his abnormally nonchalant disposition intact, "Damn. Where did those idiots go?" Kyoya and I looked around. The next ride on the list was Star Tours, but there was a sign saying that it had been closed down because of technical difficulties. After that the ride would have been the tea cups.

The two of us walked towards the teacups. Though I never usually worried about complete jackasses who were incredibly pricks (I guess I really have thrown out the whole 'Kyoya=biscuit' idea), Kyoya seemed a bit off, like his mind was contemplating how to solve world hunger using a ballpoint pen.

"Looks like they beat us here." I acknowledges, noticing the head of Mori stick out about halfway through the line for the teacups. Kyoya automatically went to sit next to a bench, and I ignored him, thinking that it would be fun to people watch for a while.

Fuck. I should have taken into account how I was feeling. My head felt like someone was beating it against a brick wall, and all of a sudden my stomach began to grow extremely queasy. I turned too quickly, making my head feel like my brain was doing doughnuts on an Indy-500 track in my cranium. I launched myself towards a trashcan conveniently settled right next to the Shadow King and let loose the yogurt and granola bar I had eaten for breakfast. Damn.

"Miss Amendier. Are you alright?" Kyoya, instead of being completely repulsed like I thought he would be, walked over to me, pulling me by the arm so that I was sitting on the bench, "Do you feel feverish at all?" Was he actually being genuinely nice to me? Was he actually doing this right now?

I shook my head to answer his question. Mildly creeped out.

"Have you felt nauseous recently?" Oh that's right! His family owned hospitals. Duh! That's why he was asking questions. It had absolutely no bearing on him actually caring about the fact that I just vomited half of my stomach lining with my breakfast.

"Not really." I blinked my eyes a few times and shook my head, receiving a piece of gum from Kyoya and popping it in my mouth. Huh, who would have known that Kyoya would have liked fruity gum. He seemed so much more like an original peppermint kind of guy.

"Hmn. Interesting."

"Ame-sempai. Kyoya. There you are, we were so worried!" Tamaki ran up to us, a very paternal look on his face. Apparently they weren't so worried as to not go on the ride and come find us, but who really expected that of these guys?

"Kate, are you alright? You look kind of pale." Kurt squeezed his way past Tamaki and sat down on the bench next to me, grabbing my hand, and looking me directly in the eyes. Aww, he was super concerned for me, how sweet. Not! I saw him spinning around, and around, and, good grief Charlie Brown, even thinking about it made me dizzy. Aw hell.

"Couldn't you have tried to make it into a bathroom or something instead of doing that in public." I had to utilize every inch of my will power to not swing my arm back at Hikaru and flip him off, so instead I finished expelling the few contents of my stomach and ran into the nearest restroom. Great Kathrin, just fucking fantastic. We'd only been at Disneyland for a few hours; it didn't make sense that I was already feeling nauseated. Then again, rides have _never_ made me feel nauseated. I walked outside of the restroom where Tamaki and Kurt were pacing. You would have thought that I was having major surgery or something.

"Kate, are you sure that you're okay?" Kurt saw me first and walked up to me, looking at me with complete seriousness and concern.

"Yeah, I think it's this heat. I haven't really been drinking much water anyways."

"Here Ame-san! You can have some of my water!" Honey graciously squeaked, opening the backpack that was on his back and handing me a metal water bottle with pink bunnies painted on it. I am pretty sure that anyone watching us right now would think that all of us are the strangest people on the face of the planet, and that Honey was a ten year old child.

"Well then, if it's the heat and lack of water that is bothering you, we should go on Splash Mountain!" Tamaki cried, pointing dramatically towards the place in the park where Critter Country was located. Hikaru and Kaoru cheered, both of them grabbing me by the arms and pulling me with them. Great guys, let's just jostle around the woman who just left her stomach in the ladies room. Real smooth guys, really smooth.

It wasn't if hurrying did any good. Just like in the States, Splash Mountain had a wait time of over an hour, but unlike the States there was no fast pass. Lameface! Either way, I wasn't going to get out of this.

"Kate, are you sure you're alright. You don't have to go on the ride if you don't want to. We can even go home if you want to." Kurt wasn't showing me fake concern; I knew that, but he looked like a little boy about to be told that his puppy was run over by a garbage truck, and I knew it was because he was possibly even more excited about Disneyland than I was. Men really didn't mature past the age of fifteen. Then again, that was probably one of the best things about their sex.

"Don't worry about me. I'm perfectly fine. Go have fun with the boys." He kissed me on the forehead, and my love for him completely overwhelmed me at that moment when I watched him join the group of men, Honey jumping from Mori's shoulders to Kurt's and the twins trying to mess with Tamaki.

"Dehydration, huh?" Kyoya had sauntered up behind me, nearly giving me a heart attack. I turned and leaned my back against the stucco cave wall that we were now under. His eyes made me want to leap out of this line and run for cover; they were so piercing.

"Look. I really haven't been drinking a lot of water today, and it is a hot day outside. Stop trying to pry into my life." He held up his hands as if to say 'fine, have it your way' as the line inched forward. I couldn't help it. I rolled my eyes and went to go join the more jolly and entertaining teenagers, who were all engaged in a conversation about what color dress Haruhi would look the best in. It wasn't much better of a conversation, but at least I didn't feel like Kyoya was trying to pry open my soul with a jackhammer.

"Kyoya. Hey, Kyoya, the line's moving and we're almost there!" Tamaki said after our long hour of waiting in line was almost up, walking over to Kyoya, placing his hands on the Shadow King's shoulders and shaking slightly. Kyoya blinked rapidly and nodded, folding his arms across his chest and sighing, finally closing the gap that had formed in the line.

Maybe I did have some disease that had made me throw up and was now making Kyoya zone out. I hung back in line a little bit, just to make sure that he would be alright. Tamaki was nearly bouncing off of the wall as we neared the front of the line.

"I want to sit in the front!" Tamaki yelled, dancing in place as he pointed to one of the hallow logs that the group in front of ours had just gotten on.

"That's not fair!" Hikaru and Kaoru screamed back at him, trying to squish past him in line so that they could get in front of him. The woman telling people which spot to go to was looking at them with an awkward smile that both highlighted her delight at having so many beautiful boys in line alongside her confusion at their idiocy.

"I think that, as your King, I deserve to sit…"

_Thud_

"Kyoya!" I whirled around after feeling a surge of air behind me and knelt, "Kyoya, hey, wake up." I should have known that something would happen! He didn't look well this morning and now he was splayed on the floor in the middle of the line.

"Kyo-chan!" Honey ran next to me, poking the completely unconscious Kyoya in the face. Everyone was crowding around now, yelling various things, including Tamaki yelling 'momma!' and 'is he going to survive?' in his spastic voice.

"Everyone, get back!" I looked at Kurt and asked him to tell someone to call the nurse as I grabbed Usa-chan from Honey's arms and placed him underneath Kyoya's hand, whispering my promise to have the pink bunny dry-cleaned. How the hell was this happening? I thought that I was the one sick today. Dammit, Kyoya. If I knew you like I knew I did then you, rat bastard, knew that this would happen.

Good grief, Kate. Cussing at the unconscious teenager was going to do a lot of good.

"Please tell that moron to stop yelling." Kyoya mumbled nearly incomprehensibly, his words incredibly slurred as he tried to sit up. His whole upper body was swaying. I had never seen Kyoya this agitated, and I figured that I never would again.

"Kyoya, are you alright? You probably shouldn't be trying to sit up right now." Kurt said, grabbing the teenager underneath the shoulders while I grabbed his feet, both of us dragging him as gently as possible out of the line and laying him down, Usa-chan tucked neatly underneath his head. Kurt took off his jacket and wrapped it up, laying it under Kyoya's feet.

"What's that for?" Hikaru and Kaoru asked as they bent over the Shadow King, both of them with small sadistic smirks on their faces. The two of them clearly wanted to burst out laughing.

"He has hypotension. If someone with low blood pressure faints you need to get their blood flow going to the right place." Kurt answered. I just knelt on the floor next to the semi-conscious teen. It felt like tears were stinging the back of my eyes as I saw my sexy Asian take charge.

"I'm fine. Go on the ride and leave me alone." Kyoya, while lying down, lifted his arm to prop up his glasses. Surprise, surprise. Kyoya is Kyoya after all. All of the boys tried to protest until Kurt wrangled them all up like a herd of cattle and got them to give Kyoya some space. It took reining in Tamaki a little bit longer, but Mori's behemothness came in handy as he linked the panicking Tamaki's hands behind his back and forced him into a log, "Miss Amendier."

I caught Kurt smile and nod at me as he stepped into the back of the log, the ride manager quickly letting the ride continue before anyone could jump out, something that Tamaki would have done had Mori not been holding him down in his seat.

"Kyoya, let me help you." I stood as soon as Kyoya tried to get up. He successfully got to his feet, but his side quickly gravitated towards the wall. He sighed as I picked linked my arm around his waist.

"This isn't an optimal position, Miss Amendier." No fucking duh genius. I was 5'1, he was 5'11…my arm was not really doing anything to hold him up. It was more the fact that he was using the shoulder the one crushed against his side as an armrest.

"Well you're fatter than I thought you'd be, so shut it with the short jokes."

"Did I say anything about shortness in that statement?" Kyoya must be feeling badly; he was acting sassy, not just being his normal smart ass self. I poked him in the side, almost making him actually collapse on his already buckling knees. Did I feel bad? Hell no. Well…maybe…just a little. Of anyone of the Host club for this to happen to…for Kyoya it would probably be incredibly humiliating.

"Look, you drink this bottle of water, and I'm going to go find you some food." I helped him sit down at a table in the shade, engaging in a hunt for food. Bwahahaha. So, I shouldn't try and torture him when he was feeling like a Mack truck hit him in the stomach, but it wasn't my fault that the only food around was turkey legs. This was sure to appease his upper class palate and manners. Ha. Haha. Ha.

Aw…I shouldn't have tried to pick on him in my mind. He looked so helpless. The bottle of water was completely gone and blowing into the umbrella pole, and Kyoya's arms were laying limply along the length of the table. His head lay on the table, his classes askew. Poor Kyoya. I'm sure those words will never _ever_ be thought by me again. Seriously. Pity…for Kyoya…something must clearly be wrong with me.

"Here. You need to eat this. It's protein. It'll be good for you." I handed him the turkey leg and watched him munch into it like a hyena, "Are you doing alright?"

"I'll be fine." He stopped talking in order to chew. I let him eat, knowing that it was more important for him to get his energy back, almost zoning out until he picked up the conversation, "Thank you, Miss Amendier. It's been a while since that's happened to me."

"Well, I'm just glad we were able to do something about it. Everyone was worried about you. I dunno if you remember, but Mori practically had to pry Tamaki off of you." I chuckled just thinking about it. These two guys were almost polar opposites.

"You're laughing because you know Tamaki and I are polar opposites." Shit, I'd forgotten he was borderline clairvoyant, "It's fine. The first time my hypotension got the best of me was when Tamaki and I were sightseeing in Kyoto after we graduated middle school. He had been dragging me everywhere, and I hadn't gotten much sleep or eaten much all day. I passed out in the middle of traffic while crossing a street. Apparently, according to those observing, Tamaki ran back out in the middle of traffic in order to dissuade anything from running me over. What a moron."

His tone didn't change, and neither did his face until the end when he looked down, lacing his fingers together and propping his chin on top of them, a thoughtful expression on his face.

"Miss Amendier. Is that really necessary?" I didn't realize what he was talking about until I felt a small droplet of water fall onto my forearm. What the fuck? I was crying? Since when did I cry in public? Since when did I cry in front of Kyoya? Since when the hell did anyone cry at Disneyland of all places? It's not like the story was a tearjerker, and I wasn't like the twins and Tamaki who cried at the slightest thing.

"I'm sorry. No. It's not. I don't even know what came over me. I…"

"No need to explain Miss Amendier. Though, I do have a question." I looked at him out of burred eyes. I really didn't want to answer any questions. I had enough of my own to answer already.

"I'll answer you if, and only if, you win." I held out my thumb, trying to stop the leaky faucet of my eyes, "One, two, three, four, I declare a…HEY! You went too early! You cheated!" Kyoya won. Already. Damn you, Ootori!

"Miss Amendier," He placed his hands underneath his chin. Uh oh. I had a feeling I really wasn't going to like this. "It is possible that my theory has no merit, though we both know how often that happens but, Miss Amendier, is it possible that you might be pregnant?"

IIIII

A/N - Dun, Dun, Dun. I'd love to thank the lovely young women I live with and I went to Disneyland with who inspired this chapter. I'm sorry it's taken a while, but college is beginning to run my life again, not me. Lame sauce. It'd be nice to get some feedback on this chapter. Just to warn you, it may be a while till the next one. Thanks guys!


	31. Bonus 4: Give It Away, Give It Away, Gi

A/N – so this is probably going to be the last bonus chapter for a while, at least until I A) get time in my life to do some more writing and B) actually get an idea. Thanks for bearing with me in this, especially since school sucks away most of my free time. The song featured in this chapter is "Give it Away" by the Red Hot Chili Peppers. Enjoy and don't forget to review, review, review.

IIIII

Give it Away, Give it Away Now

I can't believe that three little words could make me feel like such a fucking slut. I mean, honestly, did Kyoya really have to ask _that_? It wasn't as if there weren't a plethora of other things that my feeling sick to my stomach could be a symptom of. Shittastic. That's what this was. It would be so much easier if I was one of those good girls that wait until they were married to engage in the consummation of love. As if anything else could happen in my life that would make it even more of a cliché. Let us run through it, shall we.

Girl moves to Japan.

Girl meets guy.

Guy tricks (yes, Kutano Hisugawa, I stand by this statement) girl into sleeping with him.

Girl is too overwhelmed by sexy Asian to resist.

Guy asks girl to marry him.

Girl might be knocked up.

Damn the cliché and predictableness of my sad existence! I mean…really? Like, really?

_Pssssshhhhh_

The kettle on the stove whistled, so I poured the warm water into a coffee mug. It was going to be time to check the pee-stick of doom.

"Haruhi, the tea is ready!" I yelled upstairs, hearing some movement above me, followed by small thumps as she came down the stairs. I had dragged her to the drug store with me this morning.

"Can I borrow this?" Haruhi asked as I set a mug down in front of her as she sat down on one of the barstools, holding a book out at me. _Twelfth Night_. For some reason the irony was not lost on me.

"Sure, no problem. You do know what it's about right?" Haruhi nodded, uncharacteristically blushing slightly. I raised my eyebrow at her. She gave me a quick smile and a quick shrug before heading over to the couch and sitting down, opening the play. I guess I could see how the androgynous female character who is forced to dress as a boy and ends up meeting the handsomely sappy Duke Orsino would appeal to Haruhi. Ding, Ding, Ding, we have a winner. I wonder if anyone other than me saw that Haruhi and Tamaki needed to be together in some eventual future. Haruhi knew it subtly, she had to. She was smarter than that.

Why the hell am I worried about _her_ love life? I should be worried about the fucking pee-stick

in the bathroom. With a sigh I looked down at my mug filled with tea, taking in a deep breath. Come on Kate, work up your nerve to go in there. You can do it! Git ur done!

"I'm home! Haruhi, good thing that you're here! Can you hold up the door for us?" Kurt yelled as he flung open the door, holding a box in his hands. Haruhi put down the book, practically jamming it between the cushions of the couch.

"You're home early." I glared at the grinning Asian that entered through the door. Moving over to him, I looked into the box that was filled to breaking point with chords, "What is all of this?"

"I figured that since we were engaged I should finish moving in all of my stuff." He leaned over and kissed me on the cheek before walking to the television and plopping the box of chords down next to it, flashing me a grin before running outside.

"Kate-sensei, you haven't told him yet, have you?" Oh Haruhi, why do you have to be an intellectual? Why do you have to always say the things that I don't want to hear?

"No wonder you get along so well with Kyoya." She just cocked her head and looked at me with a puzzled look, "Nevermi…what the hell is going on?" That's it. Men. Are. Evil.

"Language." Kurt reprimanded me, popping me in the nose with one of his fingers as he set what looked like an Xbox 360, as well as two guitars and a box with a drum-set on the front next to the box of chords.

"Door." Mori's deep voice said as he walked through the door, a Playstation 2 and Playstation 3 tucked under each arm.

"Thanks for helping Haru-chan!" Honey was now walking through the door, a Wii and packages of attachments, including foam golf clubs, bats, and tennis rackets.

"Is this all of your stuff?" Kurt just nodded his head at me, taking the gaming systems from Mori and Honey, setting them on the ground and heading out the door again.

This was the worst morning of my life! I turned around and went back to my mug, downing the rest of the hot tea and exhaling steam out of my mouth. It looked like I was smoking. Smoking actually seemed like a good outlet right now, not going to lie. Actually, a whole pile of carrots with Tabasco sauce sounded incredibly good right now. Oh shit! No, no, no. Gah!

"Kate, hun, where do you think I should put Goldie?" I watched Kurt walk in with a huge tank in his hands. How unoriginal was her? You just don't name a goldfish Goldie. It's stupid. It's lame. It's unintelligent.

"That's the most disgusting thing I've ever seen! Get it out of my kitchen! Get it out of my house!" Uggghhh! It's not a goldfish! Ewwwwwww.

"Oh come on, Kathrin. She's cute. She's just a golden dwarf eel. Look at her swim; she's adorable!"

"Get it out of my kitchen!" The thing was almost a foot long and it was swiveling around in the water, underneath this arched black rock. It had this soft golden color, and it made me want to puke my guts out.

"Fine, fine. I'm gonna put her in the bathtub so that Mushi doesn't try and eat her."

"I don't care if you wash it down the drain; just get it out of m site!" I was holding my stomach, trying not to vomit my tea into the sink. Okay Kathrin Joy, just breathe. There wasn't anything wrong with him owning a slimy water creature, was there? Hell yes there was. It was slimy and smooth and moved like a snake. It was a fucking water snake! Ewwww.

"Ame-san, why don't you like Goldie? I think she's super cute!" Honey bounced up to the top of the counter, sitting on top of the marble and looking at me with his huge brown eyes. Well, at least with him there it would deter me from reaching up my stomach.

"Uh…Kate…" Kurt walked out of the bathroom a little shakily.

"What's wrong?" I walked over to Kurt and looked him in the eyes, grabbing one of his hands in mine. I bet it was that stupid eel.

"Well, nothing's wrong…I just…uh…here" He held up the hand that was not in me. In front of my eyes was the evil pee-stick of doom, a little pink plus clearly visible. I quickly looked away from his eyes, pushing my lips out into a fish face. Fuck.

"Kurt, it looks like I'm pregnant. Imagine that." I shrugged, trying to laugh it off. If I know him like I think I know him, he would be cool with this, possibly even excited.

_Thud_.

Huh. I couldn't help it; I kicked the unconscious body that had just thudded to the floor. So I guess I didn't know him as well as I thought, and not my life had become even more cliché because not only did my baby-daddy faint when he heard the news (like in some awkward romantic comedy) but this was basically what happened the night we met. Kate in deep shit and Kurt in deep sleep. Huh.

"Can you guy's help me get him into bed, please?" I asked as Mori practically lifted Kurt up by himself and drug him into the bedroom, plopping him down on the bed.

"Ame-san, shouldn't we get Hisu-san to the doctors or something." Honey was looking up at me with a pout on his face.

"Naw." I lay myself on the bed next to him, grabbing his hand in mine and squeezing.

"Mitsukuni." Mori made a nod towards my direction as Honey leapt onto his shoulders as if by command. Without either of them saying another word they both exited the room. I heard the door close behind them, heard the other person in the room latch the door, and then heard soft footsteps on the floor.

"I'm going to go upstairs and read, Kate-sempai. Good luck," I nodded my thanks at her dry and very blunt wish for my luck. I needed it right now.

So. I was preggers. Shit, that meant that I was going to look like Yuri in a few months time. I'm going to be freaking Moby Dick, but since I'm actually white it'll be way easier to make fun of me. My ass is gonna sag too I bet, not to mention my boobs will probably grow even bigger than they already are. This is going to suck so bad. Just being honest. I'm pretty sure I've had this conversation with Kurt before. The conversation where I told him that I like kids but didn't particularly want any of my own, meaning ones that actually have my DNA.

Dear God, Baby Jesus…my spawn is going to either be the most boring child on the planet or the best friend of the spawn of Satan. Not to mention the fact that half of its DNA is going to come from Kurt. I looked over at the still unconscious man. Maybe that means that it'll be pretty and have mad ninja skills. Probably not, with my luck.

"Kate." Ah. It's alive!

"Good morning starshine, the earth says hello!" I rumbled off the random _Charlie and the Chocolate Factory_ quotation as I brushed a lock of hair from Kurt's forehead, smiling at him.

"I had the most interesting dream. I dreamt that I came home and you said that you were pregnant, and then I woke up." He pushed himself up into a sitting position, his hand automatically moving to his forehead which probably felt like it had been rolled over by a steam-roller and then trampled by a mob of wild elephants.

"Sorry to burst your bubble, but the only part of that dream that isn't real is the part where you wake up after you hear the news. You actually fainted when you heard it. I said 'I'm knocked up' and you hit the floor like a drunken prom queen." I heard him suck in a deep breath. Did every woman feel this kind of anticipation when she told her significant other that he had infected her with his seed? Probably. It sucked. It sucked a whole lot.

"So…I'm going to be a father?" He questioned me, flipping out of the Japanese and into the English when he said the word "father." Oh crap…this is so fucking linguistically relevant! He flipped out of his native language to convey a point. There is the meaning behind this! Gah! Why the hell am I not so calm about this? Fucktastic female hormones.

"Yes. That's usually what having impregnated someone means. You don't have to say any…WAAAAHHHH!" Talk about acrobatics in the morning! Kurt flipped over on top of me and then grabbed my arms and flipped onto his back then rolled on top of me again, becoming my cushion as we both slid off the bed and onto the floor, "Ooofff…Kurt…you okay?" He had knocked the wind out of me.

"To quote my favorite person in the world: 'this is fucking fantastic!'" He lifted his head off the ground and kissed me, propping himself up on his elbows, then kissing me again.

"Language, Kutano Hisugawa, language, please…waaaaaahhhhh!" Again with the rolling and the kissing, sheesh, "If you keep doing that you might make it dizzy." I pushed him off of me, and he flopped to the floor like a rag doll while I sat up cross-legged, placing my hands on my stomach for the first time.

"I don't think that, under the circumstances, my joy could be contained in any other conglomeration of words. Because I cussed this time—and this time only—I am going to allow it." Kurt let out a slow breath, a huge grin creeping onto his face.

"Well if you think it's fucking fantastic then so do I!" I fist pumped the air. Unorthodox, yes. Look, despite the fact that I really don't feel like being pregnant, the fact that he was okay with it made it okay to be knocked up. "Kutano Hisugawa, I love you so damn much." He sat up so that he was facing me, our knees touching each others. I bent over and kissed him again…and again…and again.

"Tamaki-sempai! What the hell do you think you're doing?" Haruhi's voice screamed from out in the living room.

"Haruhi's cursed at us!" A loud whine came also from the living room. Kurt's eyes looked directly at mine. I could tell exactly what he was thinking: "Really? Now? Really?" What did he mean by _us_?

"You shouldn't be surprised Haruhi." Ah…it must be thing one which means…

"Tono knew that you were here today because you're dad is working a double shift. He wanted to see you." Which means that thing two is right behind him.

"Besides, Hisu-sempai told us that we could come over to play Rockband." Thing one and thing two gleefully pronounced together.

"Ugh…fine…come in." Haruhi admitted defeat. I could just see her eyes losing their color as he shoulders slumped.

"Really, Kurt, really?" I whispered, trying to make as little noise as possible. Why did the Host club have to ruin everything? I'm sure that Haruhi was thinking the same thing right about now, but why do they think that both Ouran Academy and my house are their playgrounds. Sheesh. They could have picked a better time at least.

"Look, when I invited them over this morning they had me pinned to a corner. You know the twins. They look at you with those big eyes and twist your words and make it seem like you owe them that much or else they will find some way to make your life a living hell." Kurt whispered back, stretching his neck up so that he could try and see over the bed, through the door, and into the living room, trying to spy on the teenagers.

"Dear God, baby Jesus man, grow a backbone. What happens if our spawn becomes a teenager and you just let it push you around like that? What if it's a girl and you can't resist giving her everything she wants?"

"If it's a girl I'll give her everything she wants, but I'm not letting her leave the house."

"Typical." I stood up, pushing myself up with Kurt's legs, "Come on, genius. It's time to deal with your own disasters." He just glared up at me, pouting. Ay, ay, ay, men! I reached my hand down and helped him up.

"Ame-sempai, you are looking beautiful today if I may say so. It's as if there is something about you that glows so brightly that when combined with my own brilliance the sun cannot even compare." I chuckled as Tamaki held out his hand to me and tilted his head to the side, grinning.

"Tamaki, get the hell inside your head out of the living room and come give me a hug." At first he looked confused, but then a small blush worked its way across his cheeks as he ran up to me and grabbed me into a hug.

"Well that was incredibly uncharacteristic. It's like your mom hormones are already…oooffff!" Kurt started talking when he was interrupted by a swift elbow to the guy by yours truly.

"Don't worry about shutting him up, Kate-sempai." Hikaru said as he sat on the back of the couch, reading _Twelfth Night_ over Haruhi's shoulder, looking incredibly board.

"Yeah, Kyoya told us yesterday." Kaoru was already setting up Kurt's Xbox 360.

"Am I aloud to have any secrets that that four-eyed idiot doesn't know about?"

"You forgot to add evil and sadistic jackass to that as well." Tamaki sat on one of the barstools and sighed, his face contorting into a glare. Probably one of the first glares that I had ever seen him have.

"How come Kyoya-sempai never tells me anything?" Haruhi grumbled, not looking up from the play as she flipped the page.

"Probably because he knew that you were going to go to the drugstore with her and that you're smart enough to figure it out for yourself. Hisu-sempai, log into your account so we can start playing." Kurt shrugged, patted me on the back, and walked over to help Kaoru set up the game while I stood there, looking up at the ceiling and asking God why.

"Anyone want cookies?" I shook my head to get out of the stupor induced by the fact Kyoya is a massive prick, only to be greeted by everyone in the living room only responding by raising their hands as they continued to do whatever the hell they wanted to, "Thanks guys."

"Don't worry Ame-sempai, I'll help you." Tamaki grinned and cocked his head to the side. I grinned at him and watched him hop of the stool, but as my glance followed him around the counter I caught Haruhi also following the Host club king with her eyes. That is, she was following his movements until she crossed gazes with me, my glance causing her to blush and look quickly back down at the play. I couldn't help but grinning. So, I was right, something was going on between those two, "Gaaahhhh!"

"What happened?" I whirled around, only to see that Tamaki's face had disappeared underneath a large metal mixing bowl, "Ha. Hahaha. Hahahaha." I curled my hands around my torso as Tamaki sheepishly lifted the mixing bowl off of his head and joined my laughing. It kind of figured that everyone else had tuned us out, everyone except for Haruhi who had moved off of the couch and moved to the barstool.

"The baking ingredients are in the cupboard above the refrigerator, could you get them down for me?" I asked the blond teenager as I rinsed the hat-bowl out and dried it off.

"So, Kate-sensei, the test came back positive right? Does that mean that you and Hisugawa-sensei are going to move up the wedding?" Haruhi asked, reaching over the countertop and filling up a glass of water for herself, taking a small drink.

"You might want to do something like that so that people don't think the kid is a bastard." Hikaru said in his very blunt and callous way. Leave it to Hikaru, right?

"I don't think we should, Kate." Kurt looked up at me, flicking his eyes from mine to where I knew that Tamaki was standing. I glanced and saw that Tamaki was pretending to be incredibly interested in mixing the ingredients for cookies. I looked back up at Kurt and gave him a nod.

"I agree. Who cares what people say? Besides, welcome to the 21st century!" Hikaru could be callous sometimes, especially considering Tamaki was illegitimate and his grandmother made no effort to hide or overlook that fact. I never want this child to feel like that, like Tamaki must feel like every day.

"To me, the baby isn't illegitimate. It's my kid. I'm its father. What people say isn't going to change that. Right Tamaki?" Touché, Hisugawa, Touché. I nudged Tamaki in the side, getting him to grin.

"Since it's the 21st century you should name it something really fantastic, like seaweed."

"Tamaki-sempai, I don't think they want to name their baby seaweed." Haruhi shook her head, but I caught her eyes and knew that she had realized what Kurt and I had done for Tamaki in that moment.

"But Haruhi, it would be original and flashy. Think about it!" The blond prince brandished his hand in the air; regrettably the spoon he had been mixing the cookie batter with was in his hand.

"Well, at least now we know that the batter tastes good," I wiped the goopy batter that had landed on my cheek off and tasted it. Tamaki had turned bright red with embarrassment and only smiled once Haruhi began to laugh at both him and me, his and my laughter joining up with her little tinkling bells.

_What I've got you've got to give it to your mamma_

_What I've got you've got to give it to your pappa_

_What I've got you've got to give it to your daughter_

_You do a little dance and then you drink a little water_

"What…the…hell…?" I dried my hands on a towel and walked out into the living room to see the TV better and wonder why it sounded like a hissing possum was in my house.

"Oh good, Kate, here, sing." Kurt quickly pushed a microphone stand towards me, continuing to move his fingers along the colored keys on the fake guitar. I heart Tamaki put a tray of cookies in the oven and saw him sit next to Haruhi on one of the barstools, both of them looking at the TV.

"'What I've got you've got to get it put it in you. What I've got you've got to get it put it in you. What I've got you've got to get it put it in you. Reeling with the feeling don't stop continue.' What the fuck is this song?" Why were we even singing this? This was so awkward.

"Kate-sempai! Don't talk or we'll lose!" Hikaru and Kaoru yelled at me, neither one of them looking up from the guitar and drums that they were playing; Hikaru on the guitar and Kaoru on the drums.

"'Realize I don't want to be a miser. Confide with sly you'll be the wiser. Young blood is the lovin' upriser. How come everybody wanna keep it like the Kaiser?'" I sang, confused, and getting laughed at by both Tamaki and Haruhi, "I don't know what I'm singing!"

"Kate! Sing, now, or we will all fail miserably!" Kurt growled as he bit his tongue between his teeth in concentration. I saw that the space where I was reading the words was glowing red. I guess that meant I was missing a lot of words. It wasn't my fault; it was the fucking crazy song's fault!

" 'Give it away, give it away, give it away now. I can't tell if I'm a kingpin or a pauper.' What the fuck?"

"Language! Now sing!"

"Bob Marley poet and a prophet. Bob Marley taught me how to off it…what is this song?"

"Kate-sempai!" The twins whined. I sang more of the song, thankful when the chorus came again. This song was scaring me.

"'Lucky me swimmin' in my ability. Dancin' down on life with agility. Come and drink it up from my fertility'….I don't wanna do this anymore!" I cried to them as I let go of the microphone and walked into the kitchen. I saw the screen flash red and then the game was gone, back to the main page. Good riddance.

"Kate! You made us fail!" Kurt hung his head flinging himself dramatically onto the chair behind him.

"Yeah, Kate-sempai, the song wasn't that bad." Hikaru and Kaoru both leapt onto the couch across from the kitchen, their chins laying on the backboard of the loveseat and their arms hanging down the back.

"That music was freaking song-porn. 'What I got you got to get it put it in you…come and drink it up from my fertility' What the hell _are_ those lyrics? It's song-porn!" Tamaki and Haruhi were practically rolling on the floor laughing their heads off. I was laughing too, "That song was just horrible."

"Oh come on Ame-sempai, I'm sure it wasn't that hard." Tamaki wiped tears from his eyes, stopping his laughter enough to speak to me.

"You are wrong! It was so awkward. Its awkwardness made it hard. I don't like doing things that are too hard."

"That's what she said." Kurt jumped at the chance to say that. I didn't even realize what had come out of my mouth until it was too late.

"Considering the fact that you're pregnant, Kate-sensei, I don't think that you really have a problem with 'doing things that are too hard.'" Haruhi said in her normal blunt fashion. The room went completely silent for about ten seconds before everyone burst out into outrageously loud laughter. I reached forward and ruffled Haruhi's hair. That's my girl.

"Touché, Fujioka, touché."


	32. Bonus 5: Eye of the Tiger

Eye of the Tiger

_4 Months Later_

"KURT! KURT! KURT! KURT!" I leapt off of my laptop and practically ran into the living room, which was incredibly difficult since I had gained over ten pounds and had a balloon protruding from my gut. Damnit! He wasn't in the living room so I ran into the bedroom. No Kurt.

"KUUUUUURRRRRRT!" I ran…well…wobbled at a high velocity, up the stairs only to not find Mr. Hisugawa there either.

"KUTANO HISSSSSSUUUUUGAAAAAWAAAAA!" I ran downstairs again only to knock into some hard and immovable force.

"Kate, I could hear you three blocks away. Calm down." Kurt said as he looked up at me from the ground, a bag of groceries in between his legs. I must have knocked him down. Ooops.

"Hehehe. Sorry. Hehehe." I giggled, unable to control myself. I held out my hand and helped pull him up off of the floor. He just grinned and kissed me on the nose before picking up the groceries and heading into the kitchen, "Ooo! Did you get what I asked for? Didya, didya, didya?" Fuck. My hormones are going insane. I feel so fucking happy all the time. So bubbly! Ever since I stopped puking out what felt like inch by inch of my intestines, I suddenly get so happy about everything. I don't understand it. It's weird but fun!

"I still don't understand the draw you have towards this awkwardness, but I guess the fact that you're pregnant has something to do with it," Kurt chuckled as he pulled out the three most beautiful snack ingredients of all time from the bag.

An excited shiver went up my back as I grabbed the three packages, popping them open. First I grabbed an Oreo cookie and twisted it open, setting the two halves on the counter. Next I opened the container of new peanut butter and stuck in my finger, pulling out some of the sticky, beige, smashed legume and splitting it among the two halves of Oreo cookie. Then, for the grand finale, I opened the package of precut zucchini and smashed one small disk of the beautiful raw vegetable on one of the peanuty Oreo cookie halves, taking the un-zucchinified half and smashing it down on top of the zucchinied half.

"Behold the awesomeness! I bequeath thee the Zucchreonutter sammich!" I held out the concoction toward Kurt and then stuffed the whole thing in my mouth. It was like Nirvana. Crunchy and savory and sweet at the same time.

"I used to think that pickles and ice cream was the worst pregnant woman food ever, but I think you've just redefined 'worst' for me." Kurt just shook his head at me and began putting the rest of the food he had bought where it belonged. I just shrugged and hopped onto a barstool, making myself another zucchreonutter sammich.

"Kurt, don't knock it till you try it. You have no idea how fantasmic this creation is. Besides, everytime I eat one the little bugger inside of me begins kicking. I think it likes the combination. How was your daaayyy?" I cooed, swaying back and forth on the stool in my excitement and I shoved a whole zucchreonutter sammich in my mouth. Damn, I feel so cheerful I could just burst!

"It was fine. No one was able to understand the difference between centrifugal and centripetal force today in any of my classes, so I had to spend extra time defining it. Then they didn't get that when I was talking about angular motion I was talking about centripetal motion, so it put me a day behind in my lesson plans."

"Zucchreonutter sammich? I swear; it helps with the crazies, and you, my love, have the crazies!"

"If I'm going crazy it's because I not only have the joy of teaching pubescents, but I also have an insanely hyper pregnant fiancé in my life. Not to mention, the pregnant fiancé is you, which is probably the largest revelation in trying to understand my neurosis," I held out my hand with a zucchreonutter sammich in it, wagging the beautiful yet strange combination in Kurt's face, looking up at him with big green eyes.

"It'll make you feel all better inside!" Damn! What the hell was this child doing to me? I can distinguish the difference in my personality within my own mind, but as soon as I open my mouth I can't articulate anything except for some extremely bright and loud and blissful insanity.

"I don't trust it, but this is the same type of thing that men have done for ages in the name of love." I grinned expectantly as he took the sammich from my hand and held it to his mouth, biting my lower lip in anticipation, "How the hell can you eat something like this?"

"Don't be mean to the zucchreonutter sammich; it has feelings!" I cradled one of the small sammiches in my arms form emphasis as Kurt spewed the small, tiny, insignificant piece of my snacky vice into the sink, "Hey! Don't through it out. Give me! Give me! Give me!"

"Take it." Kurt shoved the zucchreonutter at me, walking out of the kitchen and into the bedroom. I cocked my head to the side and stuffed the nibbled sammich into my mouth. I guess it was kind of a weird combination when you thought about it, but it was just so damn good.

"Kurt." I slid off of the chair and walked a few steps closer to the bedroom, but not completely inside of it yet.

"Mhmm." The muffled reply came.

"Spontaneous trust-fall!" I crossed my arms and closed my eyes, giving him a second's time before beginning to fall backwards.

"Shit. Kate. Not funny." I could feel his frustrated breath expelled on my face from above as he pushed me into a standing position.

"Language, Kutano Hisugawa. Language. Hehehe!" I allowed him his sigh, shaking my head and sitting on the couch. He wasn't able to resist me when I was like this. Already the ADD was wearing off; I could feel the PMS-on-steroids (my nickname for the hormonal subtleties of being preggers) winding down.

"So, what is it that you wanted to tell me? I could hear you screaming my name when I parked on the street." Kurt lifted up my legs and sat in the spot they had occupied before that, running his hands up one of my calves and beginning to massage the tense muscle. Dude, if there was nothing else to love about Kurt, the massages would be enough to keep me with him. Haha, did I just think that? Haha.

"Hmn…let's see…I feel like there was something important." Damn.

"Well, before I left you were sitting at your desk working on your dissertation. Then you told me that you were going to die if I didn't go out and get exactly everything you had on your list. When I was walking up the driveway I heard you screaming my name, and you know the rest."

"Uh…" I wrinkled my nose, thinking. Let's see. I was sitting at my desk working on my dissertation and…and…"Dear God, Baby Jesus how could I forget! I finished it!"

"Finished what?"

"My dissertation!" I screamed a little bit too shrilly. It hurt my own ears. That's right! That must really be why I am in such a good mood today. After months of hard work I finally finished writing my dissertation, "I am such a fucking awesome person! Hoo-rah!"

"Language, Kate." I smacked him. Really? I just tell him that I finished my dissertation and he scolds me for cursing because I am so excited and proud of myself. He is such a jerk. What an idiot! I got up, yanking my legs from his grasp and waddled into the bedroom, slamming the door and laying down on the bed.

"Idiot." I whispered into my pillow, tasting a tiny bit of saltwater. Oh great. Just fucking fantastic. The water works started.

"Kate, I'm sorry. I'm really proud of…are you crying?" I felt the bed sink a few inches and a warm hand laid itself on my side. Kurt was looking down at me, so I turned around and scooted closer to the middle of the bed. I was really crying right now. Damn pregnant lady emotions. I hate them.

"You were being mean to me. I told you something really exciting, and you just ignored me." Did I really just pout like that? Seriously? Why can I only be me in my head but not out loud? I DON'T cry for no reason. I NEVER cry for no reason. It's this shittastick hormones.

"I'm sorry, Kate. I'm so proud of you. You've been working on that paper for so long, and you've kept up on it even though you're pregnant. That's why I love you. You are just so amazing that I can never come up with a response fit for praising the gloriousness that is Kathrin Amendier." I felt Kurt lay down behind me, the breath expelled as he spoke warming my neck. He reached his arm over me and laid it softly on my stomach.

"That was all complete bull." I stopped crying and turned onto my back so that I look him in the face.

"Partially. Though I am proud of you, and I really don't know what to say to you that would even remotely describe how I feel. Especially considering everything you've done." Damnit! I wish I knew what he was thinking sometimes.

"We'll I still need to edit it and then translate it into Japanese and then edit it again. It's not as if it is completely finished yet. Though I appreciate…whoa!" I jerked upwards, so did Kurt.

"Did you just feel that?"

"Of course _I_ felt it. It's in _my_ body. This is the first time it's happened." I rolled my eyes at Kurt then placed my hand on my stomach next to where Kurt's rested. It happened again. I could feel a small peck from the inside of my abdomen and my hand felt it on the outside only milliseconds after. Nothing could stop the smile from creeping onto my face. I knew that something was inside of me, growing, making me act insane from time to time, but this was the first time I could really tell, without any doubt, that something was _alive_, "Kurt…hey…are you okay?"

"Kate. It kicked. Kate. It…" The rest of his words were choked out, and I could feel both of his hands shake on my stomach. He was crying. I had never seen him cry before. It was so adorable! I don't think I could describe how much love I have for this man at this moment. I watched him, his bangs hanging down past his crisp grey eyes, glossed by his own tears. It wasn't weeping; it was like the soft tears that fall slowly down someone's cheeks in one of those sappy chick-flicks when everything seems too good to be true. So fucking adorable!

"Well, it's a good thing I booked a sonogram for the end of this week because I think it's about time we stop calling the baby an 'it,' especially since our spawn seems to like kicking me." He chuckled. I reached out my hand and wiped a tear streak off of his face, leaning forward and kissing him before laying back down on the bed. Kurt lay back down too, keeping his right hand fixed on my stomach, the other's bicep serving as a prop for his head, his fingers brushing my hair softly.

"The baby may keep kicking you because you call it 'spawn.'"

"Touché, Hisugawa. Touché."

IIIII

No. Don't want to wake up. Too comfortable in the bed to wake up. Damn it. Fuck the television. Why does the television have to be on? I turned my head to see what time it was and could barely see the red 4:23pm out of the haze my eyes were experiencing. Why was the television on without the door being closed? Kurt should know better. The spawn and I need our sleep!

"Growl," I got up and decided to change into a pair of boxer shorts with flames running vertical on them and a black top. I stole the boxers and tank top from Kurt. They were so comfy! It's not fair that men's clothing has a higher grade of cotton in them. Beauty should not be painful!

Ahhhh…infinitely more comfy than elastic-band jeans. Actually, the elastic-band jeans meant for pregnant women are not that uncomfortable physically; it's the psychological discomfort of them. Kurt and I saw Kaoru and Hikaru at the mall the other weekend and the first think they did when they saw me was point and my jeans and saying "Mom-jeans. Kate-sempai's in mom-jeans," while laughing themselves to death. Needless to say, the pants make me feel like a soccer mom, which is crazy since the spawn isn't even born yet.

I folded the elastic-band jeans and made my way out into the living room, eyes still blurred from my supersized nap. The light coming from the television was dark and I could see Kurt sitting cross-legged on the couch. I honestly couldn't help myself. I smiled, remembering what happened before I fell asleep.

"So have you figured out something to call out love-child other than 'spawn'?" I sat on the couch and glomped Kurt, grabbing his hand, caressing it with my thumb as I snuggled my head into his shoulder.

"Miss Amendier, please remain calm, but I am sure that this is illegal in most industrialized countries."

Shit! Fuck! Shit, Shit, Shit. FUCK!

"KYOYA! WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE?" I screamed bloody murder, suddenly 100% awake, as I let go of the teenagers hand (more like disconnected it at the wrist and threw it across the room) and stood up, whirling myself around so that I was propping myself up with my arms, my nails digging into the armrest of the couch.

"I'm spending the evening tonight and possibly the next few evenings as well. Mr. Hisugawa ran out to grab some take-out for dinner and he said he left a note for you on your bedside table." Kyoya was completely calm and collected, as if that wasn't normal, but I was completely freaked and embarrassed. I totally just cuddled with Kyoya. I felt impure, like I had cuddled with Satan.

I ran-wobbled into the bedroom and looked down at the bedside table, picking up a post-it note.

_Kate,_

_I ran to the store and then I am going to grab some sushi. I didn't wake you up because both of you need sleep. I hope that's okay with you. I'll probably be gone for an hour or hour and a half. Hopefully I'll be home before you wake up, but if you do wake up and I'm not home then DON'T FREAK OUT. Something is probably bothering him if he is choosing to humble himself enough to stay with us. Don't kill him._

_I love you._

_Kurt_

_P.S. – He told me that one of the reasons he is staying here is because Tamaki keeps trying to break into his room._

I tiptoed away from the desk and toward the door as stealthily as possible. Note: being stealthy while pregnant really doesn't work unless you have mad ninja-skills, which I am sadly lacking. Craning my neck out, I saw that Kyoya had turned off the television and was no longer in the living room. The light in the study was on. Well, that _is_ where he would sleep if her were staying with us tonight…which I am not admitting to yet.

Ewww…I snuggled with Kyoya! Ah! Unclean, unclean, unclean! I wobbled to the sink out in the kitchen and washed my hands, getting rid of the teenage demon germs. How could I _ever_ mistake Kyoya Ootori for Kutano Hisugawa, even when dead asleep? So wrong.

"Tell no one of what just transpired here, got it." I poked my head into the study to warn the Shadow King that, one of my eyebrows raised.

"Don't worry, Miss Amendier, I won't." Did I perchance see a smirk? I pursed my lips and watched the teenager attempt to make the air-bed Kurt had probably set up before he left. It wasn't going very well.

"Kyoya, here, let me do it. You have the wrong sheet anyways." I pushed the teen to the side and grabbed the actual bottom sheet, spreading it out on the bed and placing the elastic edges over the corners.

"I've never really excelled at domestic matters," Kyoya said, helping me straighten out the top sheet over the bed, "then again I've never really excelled at much outside of business."

"Don't even go there. You are a fucking genius. Oops, uh, freaking genius." I looked around. Damn Hisugawa. He's begun to socially program me to either not curse or correct my cursing. Damn you Kutano Hisugawa.

"I'm not going to argue with you because in most things I know exactly the right things to do and say. I'm top of my class, the class representative, vice president of the Host Club, and a myriad of other titles people have given me for being one of the Ootori's. It's just…"

"Just what, Kyoya?" I'd really never seen him like this before. I mean, he acted like this when we went to Disneyland and he fainted in line, but there was an excuse to him actually acting like this then. Kyoya sat down on the bed and rifled through a duffle bag, handing me the black notebook I saw him writing in all of the time. I flipped through the pages a little before looking up to ask what exactly he had in mind, but the Shadow king had fallen asleep on the bed.

"Hmmmm," I sighed, grabbing the quilt I hadn't placed on the bed yet and draping it over the teenager, making sure that it covered him. I grasped his glasses, softly pulling them off of his face. He looked SO much more peaceful when he was asleep. Oh it's so tempting. I can't even stand it! Slowly I sucked in my breath and reached forward, brushing some of Kyoya's hair out of his face, clinching my teeth so that he didn't catch my random desire to show maternal affection. He nuzzled his nose into his forearm and unexpectedly grabbed my wrist with his hand. After a few seconds he let go and his hand fell back towards the pillow.

After clicking the light off and shutting the door, I moved into the living room and sat on the couch with the black notebook. Okay, so did he want me to read this or did he want me to do something else. He _never_ lets anyone read this so why is he giving it to me to read. Maybe it's a trap. That would be just like that little demon.

It's a trap, or a test. I know it is. I will _not_ give into temptation. I set the notebook on the couch where it would be safely out of reach and turned on the television. Do, de, do, de, do…dammit. My hand reached out independently of my brain and lifted up the cover of the notebook. I smacked my own hand. Bad hand, resist the temptation.

Who the hell am I kidding? I can't _ever_ resist temptation. I sighed and grabbed the notebook, looking stealthily over my shoulder at the closed door just to make sure that Kyoya wasn't watching me invade his privacy. I began flipping through the notebook, stopping at things that looked interesting.

_The twins made us all believe that they were feuding today. I didn't even notice. Make sure to laugh about it later._

Later? I placed my hand over my heart and flipped forward a few more pages.

_45 guests at 100,000 yen cost per guest._

_5 of Tamaki's teddy bear pencils the twins "borrowed" auctioned off at 40,000 yen each_

_Profit = 100,000 yen to use for Halloween cosplay_

Next to this there was a note that must have been scribbled quickly: _Twins and Haruhi will not be participating in Halloween cosplay = 35,892 yen savings_

All through the notebook it looked like there were notes to remember to laugh at something funny or new observations about the other hosts mixed with calculations. It was part diary, part accountant's ledger. My mind could NOT think like this. My mind couldn't be this emotionally shut off from everything. It was true that I rarely showed emotion until my mom's death, followed by the airport intervention, and now the hormonal overload, but Kyoya's notebooks were littered with reminders for him to do something as simple as laugh at a joke. I'd feel so trapped.

I flipped to the last few pages, only to reach a long paragraph at the back that had been made today. There were a few long passages throughout the notebook when something had bothered him. I began to read.

_That bastard! He is a moron, an utter idiot, to think that I would want to participate in something as childish as a sports festival. Did he honestly think that some bond of friendship would be formed with Kuze? Kuze, who has always tried to outwit me since elementary school and failed every time. Does Tamaki think that Kuze will ever care? And Kuze—I am NOT Suoh's purse, lackey, whatever you want to call it. I don't fail so that Tamaki will succeed. If I did then he would be at the top of the class, not me. Right? Besides, what would there be for me to gain by letting Tamaki win other than a gracious view in my father's eye for aiding the Suoh companies heir to greatness. Bastard. I'm not Kuze's friend. I'm not Tamaki's purse, I don't WANT to exist only in order to make him look better because that's what I've been told, and I'll prove it to them both. I'll win. I will pound the red team into dust. Honey-sempai and Kaoru are ready and willing to help me, so the white team will have victory. Try your best Tamaki, but even if it destroys me, I will not let you win this one, and I will not talk to you until I've beaten you._

So they were fighting, over a game. Though, to Kyoya it seemed like a little bit more than just a game; it was his life. A little later down the page I read a small note.

_You planned this all. You know that I would challenge you in these pathetic and childish games and not let you win. Damn you, Tamaki, how can you STILL see through me?_

So was that the answer to the way they complement one another? Kyoya constantly pushing Tamaki ahead of himself, and Tamaki subtly knowing exactly what Kyoya was doing and making him act for himself. Act like the sixteen year old he was.

I got up and walked back into the room Kyoya was occupying and placed the black notebook softly on the open duffle bag. He was still sleeping peacefully. It was hard to think of Kyoya as the teenager he was. I called him a teen and a boy, but it's hard to not forget that inside he is just a hormonal and angst-filled teenager.

I looked at my watch and realized that he had been asleep for over thirty minutes. Kurt would be back in probably another half an hour.

"WAKE UP! Time for training!" Kyoya bolted upright in the bed, a dark gleam almost surrounding him. I ignored it, grabbing him by the wrist and dragging the still half-sleeping (and rather uncoordinated) teen into the living room. Looking around frantically for my iPod, I nearly jumped for joy when I found it. My finger slid across the touch screen until I found exactly what I was looking for.

"Miss Amendier. I will have you know that I was up until…" The beat began. A familiar song to anyone who had watched _Rocky III_.

"Shut-up and start walking to the beat of the damn music!" He just looked at me, glared at me through those glasses.

_Risin' up, back on the street  
Did my time, took my chances_

"Don't give me the evil demon glare. My pregnant glare can out-glare your demon glare." I stared at him. We stared at one another for a few seconds until I overpowered his gaze. Yes, I, Kathrin Amendier, overpowered the Shadow King.

_Went the distance, now I'm back on my feet  
Just a man and his will to survive_

"I'm still not doing this," There was attitude in his words. This was good. If I could just get him to show at least a small part of the passion he showed in his words, it was a good thing.

_So many times, it happens too fast  
You change your passion for glory _

"You gave me the damn notebook for a reason. Tamaki put you in the position to fight, and now you've got to give it everything you've got. I thought you were just an overly intelligent, cocky, arrogant, deceitful, and sadistic bastard, but you have a passionate heart Kyoya Ootori, and you've got to do whatever it takes to go for what you want."

_Don't lose your grip on the dreams of the past  
You must fight just to keep them alive _

"It's not that simple, Miss Amendier. Tamaki is…"__

It's the eye of the tiger, it's the thrill of the fight  
Risin' up to the challenge of our rival 

"Tamaki is your best friend. You owe him this fight. You owe yourself this fight. So…get walking…no…running, double time! Go. Go. Go. Go"

_And the last known survivor stalks his prey in the night  
And he's watchin' us all in the eye of the tiger_

"I…" I pointed my finger at him, giving him my glare. Reluctantly, and I _mean_ reluctantly, the Shadow King began to run in place along with the music. I bet he hadn't move this fast since he was a little kid. I bet he hadn't done anything for himself since he was a child as well. This would be good for him, and I was going to make sure that I would work him to the bone.

IIIII

A/N – So we are heading into the definitive manga bits. This section starts around chapter 46 in the manga. I really don't understand the timeline in the manga so much, but I know that it is still Haruhi's first year and it is the second summer break, basically meaning that I really have no idea what time this is taking place at. If anyone has any clues I would be happy to hear them.

I'm glad I was able to post this. It's been so insane, and I appreciate everyone hanging in there with me. Someone had sent me a message asking me to take Kyoya OOC, which I didn't want to do at all because I don't like doing that. Yet, I do think that Kyoya does actually have a 16yr old side to him, and immature side, because we see it come out sometimes in the manga, though not much. In private though I think that he act more like the teenager he is. If you disagree, that makes sense to me, but I tried not to take him OOC, just try and represent the part of him that he isn't around people other than himself and maybe Tamaki on occasion.

I also had another request to do a chapter in Kurt's perspective. Let me know what you think? I may work it into this fic, but that would break the narrative style, so I was also thinking of doing a one-shot that could stand as a separate fic. There will probably be one or two more dealing with the Ouran Olympics in the manga that are in chapter 46-49. I am also planning on using some of the more profound moments in the manga in the bonus chapters, which may become not bonus chapters if I write many more of them, haha.

Anyways, long authors note. Thanks all of you and don't forget to review, review, review!


	33. Bonus 6: Let the Bodies Hit the Floor

Let the Bodies Hit the Floor

"Please tell me that he isn't going to stay with us for an _entire_ week." Kurt thought that I didn't actually catch him roll his eyes as he pulled off his shirt, but I don't get distracted by abs _that_ easily.

"Oh come on Kutano Hisugawa, _you_ were the one who told _me_ not to freak out. Not to mention, you enjoy having some testosterone here." I poked him in the stomach, earning a guttural growl for my efforts. Yes, it was true that Kyoya "Shadow King" Ootori was still hiding out at our house, but it wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. He really didn't talk or do much. He was incredibly interested in my library, and I actually got him to read _Moby Dick_. Kyoya actually really enjoyed the part where the first mate Starbuck contemplates killing Captain Ahab so that he can take control of the ship and take everyone home to safety. He said it was something about the contemplation of rising against authority.

Unlike Kurt, Kyoya actually cleans up after himself. He helps with the dishes, though when he tried to help me boil noodles and they burnt to the pan. Seriously? Who the fuck burns noodles when they're trying to boil them? Because of that incident, I decided that if I let him help cook he would poison us all.

"I know, but I didn't think he was going to be here _until_ the Ouran competition. It's just, you know, different having…someone…else…around…you know…I"

"You're not jealous, are you?" I pursed my lips, crossed my arms, and narrowed my eyes to slits. Kurt just awkwardly rubbed his neck, his cheeks turning a slight shade of red.

"Well, no, not…exactly. I just like having you…you know…to myself."

"So, you're jealous." Rolling my eyes at him, I just got into bed and pulled the covers up over my shoulder, "Typical."

"It's not that…hey…it's not…I'm thirsty; I'm gonna go grab some water. Goodnight, Kate."

"Goodnight, Kutano Hisugawa." I nuzzled into the pillow, shaking my head and chucking to myself. Kurt was completely jealous of the fact that Kyoya was spending the time at our house. He had only been here for two days. The school week was starting tomorrow, which meant that both of them would probably be dead tired by the time they got home. Kurt would stop his bitching eventually, but in a way it was kind of cute; I love that idiot.

IIIII

Having to piss like a freaking racehorse in the middle of the night is one of the _worst_ things about being a pregnant whale. Seriously, it's like my bladder shrunk to the size of cashew. There are a few things that I really don't mind about being pregnant; most of them have to do with the fact that I have an excuse to eat copious amounts of food and can take as many naps as I want to. The downside is the need to pee every half hour and that I feel incapable of being my own grouchy bitter self and always react so…happily…to everything.

"Ready to give up old man?" Someone was still awake? Sneaking over to the door I flattened myself against the wall and began to move silently against the wall towards the open door. Huh. I could just make out a small light coming into the room and could hear faint rapid clicking noises.

"You wish. Youth is wasted in the young, you naïve brat."

"Ha! I just destroyed you. Don't think that you can hide from me that easily."

"I will blow you sky high. Game over, Kyoya, game over. It's just down to us, boy, just you and me."

"You know, you get so much respect for giving blood. Come here. I'll make you bleed."

"What the hell is going on out here?" I burst out from behind the door, expecting to find the two of them going at one another with knives, or pitchforks, or something sharp and pointy. Instead…

"Sorry, Miss Amendier. Did we wake you up?" Kyoya turned around, light from the television lighting up his glasses. Kurt, who was sitting next to the teenager, turned around and grinned sheepishly at me.

"It's three in the morning and you both think that it would be the best time in the world to play Halo?" Both of them just sat there staring at me, blinking every so often. I crossed my arms. They blinked, both expressionless. I began to tap my foot. More blinking, "That's it!"

"Owwww! Kate! Owwww!"

"Miss Amend….ouch…ow"

"You two whine like babies!" Seriously? I had only grabbed them both by the ears, hauling their asses off of the couch. Men are such children! "You! Get in your room and go to sleep."

"But, Miss Amendier we were…" I threw Kyoya in by the ear and slammed the door on him. Maybe this was a bit of overkill, but I didn't care.

"Kate, we were in the middle of the game. I don't understand what the…Ouch!" Yeah, that's right Kutano Hisugawa, not so tough talking when I twist your ear in my hands. I walked into our room and practically threw Kurt on the bed, though that doesn't really work so well since he is probably three times as strong as I am.

"You thought that it was going to be a good idea to keep Kyoya up until three in the morning? He has school tomorrow morning. Not to mention _you_ have school tomorrow too. How the hell do you think you could teach students when you're half dead from…"

"Kate, are you jealous?" What just happened? I was now lying on the bed, facing upward, Kurt's face inches away from mine.

"Jealous? Hell no. I was just trying to get to sleep and you two were making noise. Not to mention that both of you are up on a school night and neither of you function well on…" Words stopped with the kiss of life. Damn it, Kutano Hisugawa. How many times has he been able to do this to me? Been able to completely shut down my Kate-awesomeness and make me weak in his hands. So lame. Lame. Lame. Lame. Lame! "I'm going to bed, goodnight." I dismissed him and turned over in bed, pulling my pillow over my head.

"Kate. You're a hypocrite, but I love you." I felt Kurt run his hand up my back and kiss the pillow on top of my head before turning off the light and crawling into bed next to me.

Hypocrite? Who the fuck was he calling a hypocrite? He was the one that was complaining about me spending time with Kyoya because he was jealous and here he was playing Halo with Kyoya until ungodly hours of the morning. Oh…right…he thought I was jealous because he was playing Halo with Kyoya. Who the hell would be jealous of two stupid men play a stupid game? I was just pissed that they were up so late on a school night. It's not my fault that I was carrying a fetus and that made me more maternal. I was just worried about their well being. It's not like I wanted to play that stupid game with those stupid jerks.

Dear God, Baby Jesus! Am I crying? What the fuck? I hate being pregnant. I hate, hate, hate, hate, hate it!

IIIII

"Hey, Miss Amendier, how was your day?" Kyoya asked as he walked through the door, throwing his bag on the couch and walking towards the refrigerator, grabbing out some rice balls that I had made this morning, pulling out a bottle of wasabi paste and squeezing some onto the rice ball.

"Are you sure putting that much wasabi paste on that is such a good idea?"

"While I'm not a fan of sweets, I enjoy spicy food. So, Miss Amendier, you never answered my question." Kyoya pulled out a stool and sat down, munching on his rice ball.

"It was pretty good. I went out grocery shopping and watched some television. Oh, I also read that book that you recommended to me, the one by Murakami. Interesting stories. Very surreal." Was this really happening? Was I honestly having a normal conversation with Kyoya? This kid was honestly surprising me. He had an appetite like a normal teenager; he played games like a normal teenager, and he was capable of having a normal conversation with someone. I think my world just detached from its axis and was rolling through space, "How was yours?"

"Boring as always. Well, except for English with Mr. Hisugawa, mainly because he absolutely has no idea what he is talking about."

"You know you're talking about my fiancé, right?" I began to tap my fingernails on the counter. Kyoya just shrugged and pushed up his glasses. I heard keys jingle and the deadbolt on the door unlock, "Speak of the devil."

"Teenagers are frightening," Kurt panted as he opened the door as quickly as he could, shutting it behind him and locking it.

"What the fuck is going on? You look scared shitless." I asked, rushing over to Kurt who had a crazed look on his face as he lifted his messenger bag over his head and placed it on the floor.

"Language. Hello, Kate." He kissed me on the forehead and walked towards the kitchen, waving to Kyoya and filling up a glass of water, downing it quickly.

_Knock Knock_

"Who's…?" I went to ask when Kurt ran over to me and placed his large hand over my mouth.

"Shh, He'll go away if we're quiet"

"I hear you Hisu-sensei."

"Great job genius" I rolled by eyes and licked Kurt's hand so that he would let me talk before unlocking the door and opening it.

"Ame-sensei, it's been such a long time since I have looked upon your radiance, and you are even more radiant because of the life that you are carrying." Tamaki entered the room and grabbed my hands in his, leaning his face down so that his purple eyes were staring into mine before looking around the room.

"So, what brings you here Tamaki? I think you nearly scared Kurt half to death."

"Well, I actually came by to see Kyoya. You see, we haven't really been talking. I overheard you tell someone else that Kyoya was staying with you. I've gone over to his house every single day, but his father is away on business with his brothers, and Fuyumi couldn't tell me where he was. I really need to talk to him." I looked backwards and noticed that Kyoya had mysteriously disappeared from the counter and was nowhere in sight. Sneaky bastard.

"I'm not going to lie to you. Kyoya is staying with us, but I don't think that he wants to talk to you." Tamaki flew into the corner, crumpling up as low as he possibly could.

"I just don't understand! He's my best friend, and I didn't think that I made a mistake. I don't know why he's acting the way he is. I don't know what I did wrong!"

"Tamaki, stop your blubbering. It's unsightly." Kyoya's smooth and psudo-sadistic voice came from the spare bedroom door. He was leaning against the doorframe, his glasses glinting down at Tamaki.

"Kyoya! Mon Ami! There you are!" Tamaki jumped up and practically leaped over the couch, arms outstretched towards Kyoya. Yeah, cause that was going to work. Of course not. Kyoya balled his fist and smashed it down on Tamaki's head, and Tamaki flew to the floor, letting out a painful grunt when he hit the floor, clearly getting the wind knocked out of him.

"Why are you here, Tamaki? I told you that I didn't want to talk to you. I told you that I didn't like how you were handling things, and I told you that I was going to pound you and the rest of the red team into dust. Is there something about that that you in all your wisdom cannot understand?" Kyoya looked furious enough to punch Tamaki in the face, but he also looked as if he was about to break down and give Tamaki a huge hug.

Tamaki was way too fragile for this kind of talk. Look at how he reacted when Kyoya told him to stop sniveling in the corner. This wasn't going to end well. Maybe I should do something.

"Kyoya, how could you…"

"It's alright, Ame-sensei" Tamaki interrupted me, standing up and brushing off some dirt from the floor, "Kyoya, mon ami, I understand. I just want you to concentrate on pounding the red team to dust, and I'm going to concentrate on pounding you into dust. I'm still going to try and talk to you because you're my best friend, and I miss spending time with you, but I don't expect you to talk with me. I'll see you around. Thank you for letting me in, Ame-sensei," Tamaki bowed towards me and head towards the door, "Oh, and I'm sorry for scaring you Hisu-sensei. I got a little overzealous."

"No worries. Just try not to chase me from the field to my pickup and then follow me in your limo and practically chase me into my own house next time you want to ask a question." Kurt walked over to Tamaki and ruffled his blond hair with his large hand. He opened the door and let the blond out, shutting it and locking it soon after, "Man, today's been weird. I'm going to go take a shower and a nap. Wake me up when dinner's ready."

I watched Kurt walk into our bedroom and close the door behind him. I could totally understand his frustration, though it was fucking hilarious to imagine him running from Tamaki across the Ouran field and the Ouran parking lot.

"That bastard." I heard a bang from the side of the room that Kyoya was on and turned around to see him with his fist upon the wall and his hand over his face.

"Kyoya, are you…" I was going to ask if he was okay, but as soon as I began to talk he let his hand down and burst into outrageous laughter, moving his hands to grip around his abdomen. What the hell just happened? Complete mood shift. I'm the one who's pregnant and supposed to be going insanely hormonal.

I'm so over this shit.

"Sorry, Miss Amendier, I assume you may be slightly confused at my momentary lapse of manners." Seriously this kid was telepathic, "Oh, and do you mind if I do my homework on your coffee table? I'm used to that at home; it just helps me get things done."

I nodded and watched Kyoya walk into the study and back out into the living room carrying a bunch of school books, sitting down and getting started.

I walked into the kitchen and began cleaning the dishes in the sink, watching Kyoya intensely. He had something planned. I know he does; I just have no idea what. This must be exactly how everyone feels around him, just as confused and annoyed. All he does is just sit there making notes in his notebook or doing some homework. The only time I've ever seen him be peaceful is when he is sleeping, and even today I was surprised at his playing Halo with Kurt and having a normal conversation with me.

Kyoya acting like a normal teenager was still surprising to me. Insanely surprising. There he was, sitting on the floor and writing in a black notebook and listening to his iPod. Hmn…Kate just had a brilliant fucking idea in order to test her "Kyoya might actually be a real teenager and not the spawn of Satan" theory.

"Hey, Kyoya, you know that I have an iHome. Don't worry about bothering me. You can put your iPod on there." I gave him a sweet smile when he peered over the couch towards me. With a shrug the Shadow King got up and connected his music player into the speaker system.

_Let the bodies hit the floor_

_Let the bodies hit the floor_

_Let the bodies hit the…_

_FLOOR!_

"What the hell is this?" I heard the three lines of whispering and then the scream in English.

"It's American Metal. Drowning Pool is the band." Kyoya quickly answered, pushing up his glasses with a finger and returning to his homework. Without even thinking I walked over to Kyoya's iPod and began to sift through his music. Half of the songs were either classical or jazz music; the other half was a wealth of metal from not only Japan but also Germany, Russia, and America.

_Beaten why for? Why for?  
Can't take much more_

_Here we go!  
Here we go!  
Here we go!_

"To be honest, Kyoya, the only things on here that don't surprise me is the classical and jazz music. I never pictured you as a death metal type of person." Truth be told, I never really expected him to listen to anything. My whole view of Kyoya began to change when I witnessed him and Tamaki wrestling on the floor, but that was one isolated incident. It changed again at Disneyland, and now I found out that he listened to music that not only I listened to, but that made him seem like he should have earrings and a studded belt. I needed to sit down.

"Miss Amendier,"

"Kyoya, just call me Kate. You've stayed here over three days, and I no longer work at Ouran, so it's fine if you just call me Kate." I wobbled over and sat down on the floor next to the glasses wearing evil genius of a teenager, looking down at the table.

_One - Nothing wrong with me  
Two - Nothing wrong with me _

"Okay. Kate, then. Please don't think I am being too forward, and I don't mean to put you in an awkward position, but I feel like I can talk with you. It's the same with Mr. Hisugawa…uh…Kurt, I mean. I don't feel like that with anyone other than Tamaki. Prior to meeting him I thought that only I had the ability to see through everyone's façades while they could never see through mine. And, well, Tamaki's such a moron. Even with this whole school sports competition he is acting like a complete idiot. I can't help but think that he's backed me into a corner."

_Three - Nothing wrong with me  
Four - Nothing wrong with me_

"I think that he has, Kyoya," I said, and despite my better judgment I put my arm around the teenager and pulled him close to me, "He forced you to act. I know that you have something planned, but I think that this time, and as hard as it is for me to believe, Tamaki's plans have finally beaten one of yours."

_One - Something's got to give  
Two - Something's got to give  
Three - Something's got to give_

"You're right, Kate, except that even in this I will not let him win. I will not only pound him into dust, but I will figure out exactly what he is planning and find a way to upset it. I will completely annihilate that idiot."

_Now  
Let the bodies hit the floor  
Let the bodies hit the floor  
Let the bodies hit the FLOOOOR_

"That's my boy." I pat his shoulder and we both laughed.

"I can't believe what I am seeing. I can't believe what I am hearing. It's like one happy family with Kate as a compassionate soccer mom coaching an angsty Kyoya on how to make the best play and beat the other kids…is this a dream? If it is then I want to wake up right now before both of you turn into demons and cut me up into little pieces" I turned around and saw Kurt rubbing his eyes with a palm and staring at us with an expression that I could only describe as awestruck yet frightened. Fucking priceless.

"I was actually thinking Chinese paper cut torture myself. What about you, Kyoya?"

"Well, I've heard that bamboo under the fingernails is a particularly good way to make someone suffer, though it would be easier to hide the body if we just went with his original idea." Kyoya wrote something in his notebook and then turned back to Kurt, pushing up his glasses so that the lenses sparked in the lamplight.

_Let the bodies hit the floor  
Let the bodies hit the floor  
Let the bodies hit the FLOOOOR_

"Fuck this shit," Kurt flew around and back into the bedroom, shutting the door. There was an audible thump which meant that he belly-flopped onto the bed or he tripped over something and landed on the floor.

"Language, Kutano Hisugawa, language." I yelled towards the closed door, laughing to myself, "Sorry about the language, Kyoya. He's not particularly lucid when he wakes up from a nap" I laughed again to myself, shaking my head and closing my eyes.

"At least he has an excuse. You curse without even consciously thinking about it." I laughed, leaning over and playfully knocking teenagers shoulder with my own.

"Hey. Well, I guess that's true. Touché, Ootori, Touché."

IIIII

A/N – Merry Christmas! I was trying to get this chapter up on Christmas, but that didn't work out so well. I'm sorry it's taken so long to update but with finals and then just having a week to just relax meant that I went from having no time to update to having too much time to do other things than write, which meant that every time I sat down to write it didn't work. The song in this chapter is "Bodies" by Drowning Pool. I hope you enjoyed it, and if you did review, review, review.

Thanks for being patient with me!


	34. Bonus 7: Let the Games Begin

A/N – So, I know, it has been forever. Technically I have had this chapter partially started since three weeks ago. I just wasn't feeling it. Mostly I wasn't feeling funny when I started it so the beginning may be a bit dry. This chapter ends the Ouran Sports Competition chapters in the manga. Since I started out this whole fic following the anime storyline and not the manga storyline, this chapter has a lot of direct quotes from the manga. The announcing is in italics and comes from the manga; the speech in this chapter is quoted and formatted like it is in the original work; the ellipses denote lines missing, and the last two lines are original to Bisco Hatori. Also, Kyoya says something in the end to Kate that is just his internal monologue in the Manga, so the last line in that is my own. I put the single quotes ('hi') in when I was quoting from the actual text. Yay MLA format. I hope you all enjoy it. I dunno when another one will be up. Could be a while.

Anyways, review, review, review!

Let the Game's Begin

"Good Morning, prince of my heart! I'm making breakfast! Eggs, ham, hash browns, homemade and freshly squeezed orange juice, and I even was up early enough to walk down to the supermarket and pick up some sourdough bread. It's still warm!" I greeted Kurt as he walked out of the bedroom, stretching and giving off a bearish yawn before walking over towards me.

"Kyoya isn't hiding around here somewhere with a knife, is he?" Kurt looked me in the eyes as I nodded in the negative, "Good." He grabbed me around the waist and kissed me passionately. Om nom nom.

"You know that we were just playing with you last night, right? I mean, you mean more to me than a mangled corpse." I turned around and flipped the ham and eggs, only to be grabbed again softly from behind, Kurt's arms wrapping around my sternum and above the baby bump, his chin on my shoulder.

"I knew in my head that you both were just playing, but you both have this insanely evil gaze in your eyes. Most times I'm able to ignore it, but when you're saying evil things then I can't help concentrate on your devil eyes. It's crazy, but you two are similar enough that it's frightening. Though you're not as calculating, which is a good thing."

"I guess that's true. I'm just glad that we could help. It's just weird to see him acting like an actual sixteen year old."

"I forget sometimes that he is one. Even in the classes that he is in with me, I forget. It's more like he's another teacher observing me, not a student learning physics for the first time. You did get to talk to him about this whole sports competition and why he's really here?" I nodded and Kurt pulled me in closer.

"I don't know what he's planning to do. I know that he's planning to win, but I looked at some of the plans he's drawn out and he's planning to win by psychological tactics. You should use what you have at your disposal in a fight, but some of these seem a little low brow. I just don't want any of the students to get hurt, and the way it's going, it looks like Tamaki might be a bit unprepared for what's going to happen."

"You're so adorable when you're maternal. Have I told you that before?" Kurt kissed my neck and let me finish getting breakfast on the table.

"No, you haven't. I get sexy and sensual often, but never adorable. It's only because of my fragile condition. I actually feel kind of normal this morning. Oh, by the way, could you go wake up Kyoya. He has to be at the stadium soon; Kaoru and Honey will be by soon to pick him up." I turned around from the stove only to meet the glaring and petrified gaze of Kurt.

"Kate. He's even more of a demon when he just wakes up than he is when is normally awake. It's frightening. I haven't even woken him up yet myself; I've heard horror stories though; don't make me do it, Kate." I just crossed my arms and glared back at him. Evil eye powers activate!

"Do you think half dead sixteen year old Kyoya is more terrifying than hormonal pregnant Kate?" I put my hands on my hips and raised an eyebrow at the man in front of me. Kurt looked intimidated by the question.

"Did I mention that you are adorable?" Kurt just grinned and shrugged innocently.

"Fine, I'll do it. Watch the food. If you burn _anything_ I will sic half-dead Kyoya on you." Kurt saluted me as I bequeathed the spatula to him. Stupid man. He should have just done what I asked him to do. It would have been so entertaining to see a 31 year old man shake and quiver at the gaze of a 16 year old boy. Alas, twas not meant to be.

I walked into the guest bedroom. The sound of an extremely loud and annoying alarm greeted me. Kyoya's cell phone was buzzing on the table and omitting a nauseating sound. It was like half beeping half foghorn. Awooooga, awooooga. How was he not awake?

"Kyoya, wake up, Kaoru and Honey will be here to pick you up in an hour. I made breakfast. Kyoya." I walked over to his cell phone and picked it up off the table. It had been going off for over an hour and a half. Seriously…how the hell was he not awake? "Kyoya, you need to wake up." I poked the shoulder of the sleeping teen and he let out a low growl before flipping over onto his stomach, his arm hanging limply off of the bed.

Hmn…

I snuck over to his school bag and pulled out a black pen, walking back to the bed and sitting down as carefully as I could. Hehehe. Being as careful as I could, I uncapped the pen and brushed the hair up on the back of Kyoya's neck, writing "momma Ootori" on the back. Kyoya twitched slightly and turned back over.

"Kyoya, wake up!" I shook the teen's shoulders only to be met with two devilish dark purple slits.

"No. Get out. Most people value their lives, and I suggest that since you are caring for not only your life but your mutant spawns as well, you should get out. If you wake me up then you will become prey to natural selection. What awaits you at the end of the evolutionary chain is death. Now run along and don't let the door hit you on the way out."

Did he just…I knew he could be uncharacteristically cruel when he was just waking up, but I didn't know he could be so brutal. Dear God, Baby Jesus.

"You threaten my life while in your semiconscious state, it's totally fine, but when you threaten the life of my unborn mutant spawn, then let the games begin. Bitch, there is no evolution, just a bunch of animals that I decided not to kill." I screamed before thrusting out a leg and kicking that Shadow Bastard out of the bed and onto the floor, "That's what you…ahhhh!"

One would think that being engaged to a Physics teacher would have its perks in being able to avoid certain everyday occurrences…like gravity. I'm pregnant; therefore, my center of gravity has changed; therefore, I should have realized that, if I kicked instead of pushed, I would have ended up on my ass.

"Kate! Are you alright?" Kurt's voice got closer as he entered into the room. Kyoya had gotten up onto his knees and was rubbing his head, which much have hit the ground worse.

"I'm sorry, Miss Amendier. Ouch. I'm awake now…barely." Kyoya said, tottering onto his feet and blinking rapidly, "Miss Amendier, Kate?"

I dunno why, and I tried the rational and non-hormonal recesses of my mind to not, but I started to cry. The hot tears and snot were dripping down my face as I sat spread-eagled on the floor like a five year old. What the hell is wrong with me?

"I…I…" Kyoya stammered with as much concern as Kyoya Ootori could ever show, holding out his hand and slowly moving towards me. The fact that he was actually showing any concern, compassion, emotion (take your pick) for me just made me cry harder.

"You so mean, you fucking rich bastard." I just cussed at Kyoya. After all that he opened up to me this week, I cursed at him. I'm a horrible person and these fucking ugly and unwanted tears won't stop flowing. I mean, he knew that I wasn't being serious, right? He looked kind of hurt…maybe…I dunno. I hate me. Blaaaaaaahhhhh!

"Kate, I can't believe you would say that! I'm pretty sure he said something harsh, but he was half asleep still. Give him a break." Kurt was defending Kyoya. It was probably good that he was. I rubbed my face free of the water and other goop, but despite my best efforts, my rational mind wouldn't overcome the hormones.

"How can you be on his side? I'm your baby mama!"

"Oh come on, everyone does and says stupid things when they wake up." Kurt bent over and grabbed me from behind, pulling me up so that I was held in his arms. I buried my face in his chest and forced the tears to stay back.

"But what he said was really really mean!"

"You say things like that to people on a daily basis when fully aware, suck it up." What? Did that really just happen? Did _that_ really just get said to me? _Really?_

"Suck this up, buddy!" I yelled and used my palm to slap like I had never slapped before. I humphed and held my head high as I walked into the kitchen to finish making breakfast. I turned off the pans on the stove and began to plate the food on three separate plates.

What the fuck is wrong with me? I ran back into the bedroom where both Kyoya and Kurt were just staring at one another half confused half frightened looks on their faces. Breathing heavily, nearly hyperventilating, I grabbed Kyoya's hand and then grabbed Kurt's, pulling them both into a group hug.

"I'm such a horrible person; I'm sorry!" And the tears came rushing back like a like a politician after getting out of jail for embezzlement.

IIIII

"'I'm so excited, and I just can't hide it. I know, I know, I know, I know, I know I want you, I want you!'" I sang as Kurt and I walked hand in hand to the Ouran stadium. After the tumultuous start to my day, I was ready to see a competition. I was also ready to see what Kyoya and Tamaki had planned for one another.

"Katie!" My name was being screamed from behind me, and as I turned around I was met by the gaze of a gorgeous woman. No, wait…

"Ranka? It's been forever since I've seen you! How are you?" I wobbled forward and grabbed Ranka into a big hug, "Have you cut your hair? Those earrings are spectacular, and that scarf is just wonderfully accenting your top. You are such a beautiful person!" Dear God, baby Jesus, I feel way too happy right now. I hate emotional roller coaster days. I hate that this probably won't be the end of them. Damn.

"Doing great! Oh, Kurt, thank you so much for letting me know about this competition. I wouldn't have known about it had you not informed me. You know how Haruhi is…"

"Don't mention it. Well, we should probably head to our seats. They saved seats in the front rows for the staff, so we need to head down to the field. Do you want to sit with us? I'm sure we could squeeze you in." Kurt leaned forward and shook Ranka's hand while grinning his kind smile. Sigh…his sexiness is acting as a sedative. That's good to know for future reference.

"Actually I am meeting Misuzu and his daughter here, so I'll catch you after the completion! Go Red Team!"

"Hehehehe, yep!" I lifted my hand into the token anime peace sign and tilted my head, bidding Ranka a fond farewell. Kurt turned me around by the waist and we made our way down the ungodly amount of stairs to our seats in the first row. Good, we had made it just in time, especially since it took an inordinate amount of time to go down the stairs due to the fact that I had to go down one step at a time or else I felt as if I was going to roll down the stairs.

"So, I thought you said that you weren't going to be rooting for either team. I quote 'they are all my former students and so it would be unwise for me to choose sides, especially since Kyoya was our guest this week.' Well, what do you have to say for yourself, Kathrin Joy?" Kurt put his arm around me as I leaned into him.

"Of course. It's not like I would pick Kyoya over Tamaki or vice versa. I just…"

"Kate-sempai! It's good to see you again! Thanks for getting Kyoya-sempai up this morning when you did or we would have never made it here. It's good to know that you're supporting the White team! Wish us luck!" Kaoru yelled at me from the field as he was jogging to the sidelines to grab a water bottle. I nodded to him as he jogged off, rushing over to talk to the rest of the White team.

"So…back to what you were saying…'it's not like you would pick Kyoya over Tamaki', yet Kaoru is obviously under the impression that you are rooting for his team, which is definitely not a stretch considering that you are wearing all white. So, tell me, Kathrin Joy Amendier, whose side are you really on?"

"Hmn, quite the intuitive man, aren't we Kutano Hisugawa. However, if you intend to judge my choices then I suggest you not be hypocritical enough to make my mistakes your own. I notice that you don't hesitate to broadcast my flaws and my team preference, but I also notice that you are wearing all red. Supporting the Red Team are we?"

"It seems as if our observational prowess has brought us to an impasse my dear Kathrin. It is times like these where what is right is to accept the differences and grin until one of us beats the crap out of the other. What do you say?"

"Indeed. Your insight astounds me as it is so much like my own. Fine, since we have chosen to represent two sides of this battle, at the foreseeable end of Kyoya's triumph you owe me an entire day of watching Buffy the Vampire Slayer, including an endless supply of zucchreonutter sammiches."

"You are matched, Kate. At the foreseeable end of Tamaki's triumph you will not only make me all of the food that I desire whenever I desire it, you will also stop making me go out on zucchini and oreo runs in the middle of the morning."

"But…" I am a pregnant woman and he is betting me so that he wins he doesn't have to take care of me and his unborn child. Okay, that may be a little bit of a stretch, but not getting me a steady supply of zucchini and Oreos make me go insane. Kyoya, don't fail me now! "You're on Kutano Hisugawa, you're on."

We shook on our deal and then looked out across the field.

"_The day has arrived, what wonderful autumn weather. Here, ladies and gentlemen, begins the first ever Ouran High School Sports Festival!_"

The announcer's voice echoed over the crowd as everyone cheered. The Red and White teams were in the respective corners. This was the moment that all of my hard work this week had come to. Kyoya, Honey, and Kaoru had worked incredibly hard training for this. They couldn't let me down. If they did then _they_ would be the one's buying me zucchini and Oreos in order to feed me.

"_The first event is the ladies' bread tasting contest…The Red Team forfeits! The White Team wins!"_

"_Next up is the men's 100 meter dash…the White Team wins!_"

"_Another victory for the White Team_"

"_Next up is the co-ed beanbag toss_."

"Does there seem to be a pattern here? Those zucchreonutter sammiches are mine. Mwahahahahaha! Mwahahahaha!"

"Don't count on winning just yet! The competition isn't half over yet. I'm sure that Tamaki and Kuze will find a way to catch back up to the White Team."

"Do I detect a hint of nervousness? Your voice is quaking like San Francisco. You're going down Kutano Hisugawa, and there is nothing that you can do about it!"

"_The White Team Wins!...The White Team wins the next race!_"

"These races are rigged! No way that distracting the competition like that is legal! Come on! Where are the penalties? Where are the referees? Damn it! Something has to be done about these low brow attacks!" Kurt was screaming beside me, standing over and leaning over the railing as if getting those few inches closer to the track would actually do something.

"Nothing illegal is going on." I crossed my arms and my legs, smirking as another member of the white team won a race, "Yes, the techniques may be a little bit…skewed…but there is nothing illegal about them. If the members of the Red Team didn't allow themselves to be distracted then they would be winning. It was their choice not to arm themselves against this type of psychological tactic. Especially with Kyoya running the White Team."

"You mean with your help in helping Kyoya figure out how he was going to run the White Team. How can you be so heartless?" Kurt looked down on me with eyes filled with contempt before ignoring me. Haha, competitive much?

"_The score is now 63 points for the Red Team, 183 for the White Team. The White Team Leads by an amazing 120 points! The second half will begin momentarily after both teams have prepared themselves for the cheerleading competition."_

"Since we have a break, I am going to use the restroom. Can you be a darling and get me a soda and a pretzel from the snack shack thingy? The Red Team is already losing, so you may want to start practicing at being my slave. I love you!" I turned and attempted to move quickly up the stairs so that I could avoid whatever glare I was getting from Kurt. I also moved quickly because my bladder was about to explode. It's amazing how much more a pregnant woman has to pee when compared to a normal woman. Sometimes I just don't understand the human female body, and I really don't desire too.

Sigh. These games were exciting, but they were training. Kyoya's tactics were exhausting; though, I still would never admit that he was cheating. He wasn't; he was exploiting. They are very different things.

"Miss Amendier, how are you doing this fine day?"

"Oh! Chairman Suoh! How are you? Did you come to watch Tamaki?" I practically ran into the Chairman of Ouran Academy as I came out of the ladies room. That's kind of embarrassing.

"Of course! My son is so incredibly talented and adorable! Did you see that cute candy bear he made for the candy crafting competition? It was so wonderful. How talented a boy! Though, by the looks of it, I'd say that you aren't quite rooting for the Red Team."

"You would be right, sir. Though I agree with you 100% with what you said about Tamaki. He is a wonderful boy; I just think that Kyoya deserves to win this one, despite his techniques." I clasped my hands in front of me and looked down at the ground, trying to avoid the piercing gaze of the chairman.

"I think you're right. Kyoya's father puts a lot of pressure on him, and I believe that if his father were here then the score would be much closer, and the winning team would most definitely be the Red Team. Not saying that I don't believe in my sons ability to win; I do. I know if Kyoya were trying to impress his father he would let Tamaki take the crown in the end. My son has a wonderful friend; though, I wonder if Kyoya being such a 'wonderful' friend hurts Tamaki just a little bit. My son isn't as much of an idiot as he acts."

"Sir?"

"Oh my dear! Let's make a bet, shall we? If the White Team wins then it would be my pleasure to give you back your position at Ouran Academy. Granted you would have to be married to Mr. Hisugawa before you began teaching; can't have any scandal at my school you know."

"Sir?"

"And if the Red Team wins, well, I will think about that and get back to you. Enjoy the rest of the games. I've been told the Red Team's cheer is very…inspiring." The chairman saluted me and walked off. I blinked in rapid succession before walking back down to my seat.

"Kate, are you okay? You look like you just won the lottery."

"Chairman Suoh said that if the White Team wins I can have my job back at Ouran. That would mean that I would have a job and would mean that they could stop having your incompetence ruin any chance these students had at being successful speakers of English."

"Hey. I take offense to that. Though, having you back at Ouran may not be a bad thing. I'd get to see you more often during the day and could keep more of an eye on you and the fetus."

"_The Red Team is preparing for their cheer. They moved from the center of the field to the Red Team bleachers at the last minute!"_

"It's starting again. I guess, for the sake of your wellbeing, Kate, there is only one thing for me to do…BOO Red Team! Go White Team!" Kurt took off the red button up shirt he was wearing, leaving only his white undershirt. I knew that I loved this man for a reason!

"'O for a muse of fire…" Hikaru began as he walked out in overtly flamboyant 15th century garb.

"No. No, no, no, no, no…not good!" I chanted over and over again. I know that prologue. I know it oh so well. This was horrible. I was immediately torn: torn between my desire for the White Team to win and my surprise and wonder of having witnessing this moment. The moment when cheerleading becomes something actually interesting, no offense.

"We're just going to lose anyway, so let's get this over with and go…" I heard someone on the Red Team mumble over the hushing of the crowd.

"'What's he that wishes so?

…

Rather proclaim it…

That he which hath no stomach to this fight,

Let him depart; his passport shall be made,

…

We would not die in that man's company

That fears his fellowship to die with us.

….

He that outlives this day, and comes safe home,

Will stand a tip-toe when the day is named,

…

Old men forget: yet all shall be forgot,

But he'll remember, with advantages,

What feats he did that day. Then shall our names,

…

We few, we happy few, we band of brothers;

For he to-day that sheds his blood with me

Shall be my brother!'

Now soldiers, march away.

And how thou pleasest, God, dispose the day"

I couldn't help it. I stood up and applauded! _Henry V_! With much edited out and with a last rhymed couplet added…it was still wonderfully embracing, heroic, and inspiring. This was not good. My heart was overflowing with passion for the words of the Bard that I almost forgot that I was cheering for the Red Team. This speech, the inspiring speech that has been quoted to men on the battlefield since the immortal Shakespeare wrote them down. Damn that Tamaki Suoh.

"_Next up is the obstacle race! The much anticipated battle between cousins Haninozuka and Morinozuka is now starting! On your mark…get set…go!_"

Honey had trained so hard for this. He knew that he would be facing Mori, so the innocent act was meant to catch the larger teen off guard. Kyoya and Honey had mapped out how this entire obstacle race would go. Honey would succeed; he had to.

"_The Red team wins! The point goes to Morinozuka for landing on the mat first! A rare first place for the Red team!"_

"What?" I screamed, standing up and slamming my hands on the metal bars, "How did that happen!"

"_The Red team wins the second race…it's the red team again…their leader's comeback has invigorated the red team even more; who will win the three legged race? And it's the Red team again! The Red team takes the Tug-of-war. They've also won the tightrope walk and balance-ball race. The Red team earns more points in the men's 1000 meter race!"_

"No, no, no, no, no! This is not happening! I'm all for the revitalizing genius of Shakespeare, but right now it's not helping my cause. No, it's not Shakespeare fantasmic genius that is the fault, it's _yours_!" I turned and pointed at Kurt, grinding my teeth.

"Hey, don't blame me that Tamaki's speech helped reunite and rejuvenate his team."

"I am going to. We started losing when _you_ joined _our_ side. It's your fault! Change back now, change back, change back, change…"

"_The team who wins this relay will win the sports festival!_"

"Kate, look, look at that! The Red team switched its anchor for the race to Tamaki. Tamaki and Kyoya are going to go head to head to win the competition." Kurt was tapping my shoulder neurotically. He just kept tapping, tapping, tapping. I grabbed his hand and squeezed. This moment was so tense. You could feel the entire stadium leaning forward in anticipation as the gun sounded.

Dear God, baby Jesus. It's a good think that I am only four months pregnant because the suspense of this race could push me into premature labor. The Red and White teams were neck and neck. This was so fucking intense. Who was going to win? Could Kyoya even run? Did he ever do anything physical? They both received the baton at the same time. Two best friends competing head to head. Wow, Kyoya actually could run. Who knew. Anyways, two best friends competing. This was like the epic battle between Othello and Iago, between King Arthur and Lancelot, between the Fox and the Hound.

"_It's…OOTORI! KYOYA OOTORI IS THE WINNER!_"

"WOOOOHOOOOO! That's my boy! Yes! Hahahahaha. Suck that, Red Team!"

"Kate, calm down! Let's go congratulate them!"

We walked onto the turf and up to where the entire Host club was standing, congratulating one another. I was so glad that Kyoya had won. Kyoya and Tamaki were still talking. I wanted to hear what they were talking about! I walked around the group and around Kurt who was now ruffling the hair for the twins and shaking hands with the other members of both teams. Stealthily I eavesdropped.

Look, this, again, was different than Kurt's eavesdropping. I had been invested in their drama since the beginning of this whole Ouran Olympics thing. I deserved to know if anything had been solved.

"'Wasn't it fun, Kyoya? Isn't it nice having a youthful battle once in a while, without regard to how it could benefit you?" Aha! So that's what this was all about. Tamaki, such a wonderfully bright and beautiful human being. He just wanted Kyoya to do something for himself. Awww. It almost makes me want to cry again.

"'I already know that otherwise I wouldn't hang out with you guys." Tamaki sighed and then smiled, pivoting around and joining his teammates.

"Well done Kyoya. I'm proud of you." I walked up behind the teenager and laid a gentle hand on his shoulder. He turned to me and smiled.

"'Even though I won, I feel more like the loser. Probably because of how I won. Still…I've always thought of school as a simulation ground to practice the manipulation of people. But…if I find even one person I consider a true friend here...that is more than enough for me.'" Kyoya smiled up at me. An honest smile from the Shadow King. Does that even happen in civilized society. I couldn't help it…he was so adorable that I just had to…I pulled him into a hug, and to my surprise, he actually hugged me back and whispered into my ear, "Thank you for everything, Kate."

I stood there, stunned as I watched him run back to his team; the members of the White team lifting him into the air and the twins both laugh at him as Kyoya mumbled that this was 'undignified' under his breath.

It was adorable. So adorable that I could…no. No…no crying. What the hell? This is _not_ a fucking heart wrenching high school comedic drama!


	35. Bonus 8: Gonna Miss You When You're Gone

A/N – So…while thinking about writing this chapter I went through the Manga and made a timeline, realizing that It's almost an entire two and a half years that they are in the same year because it's spring and summer like two times. The part where the Ouran Sports Festival takes place is at the end of the summer, so, after that, it's probably September or October, which means that the chapters in volume 12 takes place in November (Mostly the France arc) and half of Volume 13 in December, which also means that it's technically Kate's birthday again and 2ish more months added onto her pregnancy. I am just going to go with the Manga timeline for this since that is what I have been doing for the bonus chapters (remember that the main storyline took place during the anime timeline while the bonus chapters have been following the manga). Since none of the characters actually age in this twoish year insanity that happens in the first 11 volumes, and I can't, in good writing conscious, not have Kate age…I am taking some poetic license and aging Kate as well as the rest of the Host club members. For instance, Kyoya's birthday is in November as well, so he will be turning 17. Make sense? Since Volume 13 is most definitely in December, then I am situating the France Arch towards the end of November since they spend 10 days in France and Volume 13 picks up immediately when they get back. Make sense? Sorry if this frustrates any of the purists. I'm kind of a purist myself, but it's hard to be when the timeline in a work isn't consistent.

Long authors note…hope you enjoy the chapter. I'm SOOOOO incredibly sorry that this has gone so long without being finished. I suck. I've been graduating from college, attempting to make a little money, applying/beginning my credentialing program, dealing with my parent's divorce, etc. etc. etc. Anyways, I dunno when my next update will be. It's kind of lame. Anyways, if you enjoy the chapter review!

Gonna Miss You When You're Gone

_7 months pregnant_

It's been two months of complete bliss. No work, no dissertation, a more regulated peeing regimen and, best of all, no Kyoya Ootori or the rest of the Host club. All is right with the world. It's not as if getting to know the demon teenager on a deeper level was a bad thing, and seeing all of the boys compete was fun, but it was nice for it to just go back to being me, Kurt, and the fetus.

"Good morning, Kate." Kurt brushed the back of his hand against my cheek. The warmth of him made me want to snuggle back under the covers, keep my eyes closed, and go back to sleep. My fiancé is so smumfy. These days I felt more and more like a beached whale, especially since the little bugger in my belly liked to move around during the most inconvenient times of the day. Either way, come back to the light Kathrin; it's time to wake up and greet the morning.

"Good morning to you too, Kutano Hisugawa." I grabbed his hand in mine and kissed the back of his fingers while looking into his deep gray eyes.

"You are so gorgeous in the morning"

"I know. I'm so attractive that even my bacteria are cute." He laughed and the fetus began to kick. Kurt pulled up my shirt and kissed my belly, eventually using it as a pillow. Kurt always seemed to be able to tell when the spawn was moving; it was like they already had this father-child bond.

"Well, I don't know about bacteria being cute, but if you think so, then go ahead. Oh, by the way, Kathrin, Happy Birthday." Kurt brought his hand to my cheek and caressed it.

Hap…py…birth…day…? Holy Mary, Mother of baby Jesus!

"Kate, did you forget your own birthday?"

"No…what…what makes you say that?" Shit…I forgot my birthday and just lied about it.

"Then, of course, you didn't forget that we're going to an ultrasound today and that I'm taking you out to dinner at that Karaoke bar?"

_Do you ever feel already buried deep_

_Six feet under scream_

_But no one seems to hear a thing_

Thank you Katy Perry, way to rub it in. Buried deep would be an exaggeration. At least being pregnant was kind of the reason that my mind had suddenly gone to hell. Then again, I was able to finish a dissertation while under the influence of hormone enriched placenta, yet I can't even remember my own day of birth. Wow.

_Do you know that there's still a chance for you_

_Cause there's a spark in you_

"You did forget. I can tell because your eyebrows are doing this weird thing where they move up and down at uneven increments as if they're having a conversation with the rest of your face."

_You just gotta ignite the light_

_And let it shine_

_Just own the night_

_Like the Fourth of July_

"How do you know me so well?"

"Maybe the DNA mixing bowl in your uterus has made a link between our brains and made it possible for me to understand you. Well, understand you a little bit more than previously." I chuckled and he joined me, kissing me on the forehead before getting up and pulling jeans and a t-shirt outside of the closet.

_Cause baby you're a firework  
Come on show 'em what you're worth  
_

"Kurt. You wanna know the reason why I really fell in love with you? The real reason."

"Oh yeah? What is that? My charming wit? My engaging personality?"

_Make 'em go "Oh, oh, oh!"  
As you shoot across the sky_

"Well, all of those things were factors. That's certain. The real thing was your tight, tight, ass." I grinned while ducking the dress he threw at my head.

"You're glad you're pregnant, or I would destroy you. Now, would you hurry up and get ready. I don't want to be late to check on my child's progress."

"Cause baby you're a firework. Come on show 'em what you're worth." I stood up and threw off my pajamas, wiggling my way into the dress Kurt had carelessly thrown at me while singing and attempting to dance around. Multitasking is one of my strong points.

"Kate."

"Make 'em go 'oh, oh, oh!' as you shoot across the sky, ay, ay."

"You're so weird. Brush your teeth and meet me in the car." Kurt saluted me and walked out of the room.

"Flaunt that tight ass! Woof! Woof!" Well done, Kathrin. You are the classiest individual ever. I shrugged my shoulders and walked into the bathroom, running a brush through my hot mess of hair and brushing my teeth. I could hear Kurt grab his keys off of the counter, walk to the front door, and exit the house, "He's so adorable. Hehehe."

"Took you long enough. How long does it take to brush teeth?"

"I'm going to pretend that you didn't ask your pregnant fiancé why it takes me a long time to get ready in the morning. Now, drive bitch, drive!"

"Language, Kathrin. Language."

IIIII

"Ma'am. I know that many couples decide to wait to know the sex of the baby, but I also know that many change their minds. Since this will most likely be your last ultrasound before you give birth, do you wish you change your minds?"

"Boy, girl, it doesn't really matter so much to me. For all I know, if it's a boy, he will end up being a complete pig, and if it's a girl, she will probably be super girly, a total cheerleader type. It's just better off not to know because then I won't actually dwell on all of the potential possibilities for my spawn to be so unlike me that I'd learn way too much about everything I'd never wanted to know."

"Well, that was quite an answer. I don't think I've ever heard something like it." The nurse just smiled at me, folded her clipboard into her chest, and bowed. It was the same thing she did every time she saw me.

"That's just my Kate." Kurt bent over the hospital bed and kissed my forehead, eliciting a giggle out of the nurse. That was something she also did.

"Well, Miss. Amendier and Mr. Hisugawa, your child is doing just as well as can be. Quite lively actually."

"Good. That means I can hop off these stirrups and get to dinner. I'm starving!"

"Yes, ma'am, that's exactly what that means; however, I do think that hopping would serve you well right now."

I gave the still giggling nurse a wink and moved my body as if I was about to jump off of the bed._  
_

"Don't you dare" Kurt stepped in front of me, pushing back on my arms so I couldn't jump off the hospital bed. He was so predictable. I tried doing something to overreact or say something that made him think twice every time we came to one of these. The nurse was already captivated by my American charm, and the fact that Kurt was 1) incredibly predictable, 2) always trying too hard not to be embarrassed or 3) trying too hard to not laugh at me.

"You're too easy" I laughed and slid slowly off of the bed, kissing Kurt on the lips on the way before reaching up my arm to ruffle his hair.

"Look at the one who's pregnant before you call someone else easy."

"Touché, Hisugawa. Touché."

IIIII

"Happy"

"Birthday"

"Happy, Happy"

"Birthday, Birthday"

"Thanks guys. Now stop circling me if you don't want me to throw up on you both." I tried to glare at Hikaru and Kaoru, but I couldn't stop the smile from warming its way onto my face. I was waiting for Kurt to get done meeting with Chairman Suoh, planning on taking a nap for a few hours before dinner, when Hikaru and Kaoru basically broke down the door to the house. I don't really know why they came. They said that they were in the neighborhood trying to bother Haruhi, but she wasn't at home and they didn't want to go home.

"Sooooo….Hisu-sempai is taking you to dinner tonight," Kaoru asked, sitting on the couch next to me.

"Yup."

"Why aren't you taking us with you?" Hikaru carelessly commented as he sat on my other side, grabbing the remote from my hand and changing the channel.

"Because…Hey! I don't need to justify what my fiancé and I do in our spare time."

"Are you sure about that?" The two of them questioned, leaning forward and looking at me with their devilish gazes. What was it about me that made me get in the middle of these two? All the time! I swear it's a curse.

"Ugh, you two need to leave. Now." I ignored the groans and growls coming from the two of them as I grabbed them by their collars and dragged them to the door. It took all of my strength to push them outside and lock the door behind them.

Maybe now I could get a nap in before going to dinner with Kurt. I was going to need all of my strength tonight to be able to sing. I hadn't been karaokeing in a while, and I knew that since Hotaru and Yuri were coming tonight, Yuri and I would want to do a duet or something. Just because I was pregnant didn't mean I couldn't jam.

"Katie!" Come on! I _just_ sat back down!

"Hello, Ranka. How's it going? Just hold on a little bit. I'll get to the door when I can." I hadn't expected anyone to come. Kurt was gone for an hour at least—at least!—and I was _so_ expecting, wanting, wishing, to get some rest.

"Take your time, Katie. I'm doing wonderful; Haruhi and I've just finished shopping. She was going to come over but she said that she had to do some homework. I think she's doing something with those Host club boys. I worry about her all the time. Kyoya Ootori, those Hitachiin twins, Honey-kun and Mori-kun are wonderful boys, but I'm not sure about that degenerate idiot Tamaki Suoh."

"Ranka, can I be one hundred percent honest with you?" Okay, Kate, breathe. It's a good thing Ranka won't mind talking through the doorway at me because getting my ass to move anywhere takes a great deal of effort, "Come in" I opened the door, let the tranny inside, and leaned back against the wall to catch my breath.

"You wanted to be honest with me about letting me in your love nest?" Ranka sat on one of the barstools, crossing his legs underneath the black pencil skirt he was wearing.

"Okay, I need to be honest with you about two things. One is much less serious than the other."

"Fine." I wobbled around and sat down on the couch so that I could look up at Ranka, "First of all, it isn't fair that my legs look like this when your legs look like that. I know that I'm basically a walking greenhouse for my seedling, but if my legs don't go back to the way they were and yours end up looking sexier than mine, I'm going to sue you for psychological damage." Ranka just smiled and re-crossed his legs. Spiteful transvestite. Rub it in.

"Second. Of all the Host club members, I would rather have my daughter hang out with Tamaki or Honey and Mori. The twins are demons and Kyoya is evil incarnate. Tamaki has at least some redeeming features. He might be an idiot, but he really isn't _that_ much of an idiot. Also, you should give him a little bit more credit. He takes care of Haruhi. I mean, they all take care of her, but no one so much as Tamaki. Give him a break, Ranka."

"You're gonna make a good mother, Katie. I know he's a good guy. I'm not as blind as Haruhi thinks I am. I know she likes him even though she hasn't realized it herself yet. He'd be too much of an idiot to not fall in love with my little girl. But it's all so fast. He's going to tear my little girl away from my eventually, so now I'm going to hate him before I have to like him."

So typical.

"Dear God, baby Jesus. Men like you are the reason I hope my spawn isn't a girl. I can just imagine Kurt going noble and protective over her. He already does that to his sisters"

Ranka hopped off of the stool and came over to me, placing his hands on my shoulders.

"Men like us are the reason you're happy." He leaned over and pecked me on the top of the head, "Oh, I got you some Niboshi. You both need your calcium." He looked down towards my extremely convex belly, "I'll let myself out; don't worry about getting up"

Somehow that last statement made me feel more like a fucking whale than I already do.

IIIII

"Surprise!" No. No. No. No. What a huge ass clusterfuck. I mean, I'm flattered, really I am, but is there something wrong with having a _normal_ birthday. A _quiet_ birthday.

"Ame-sempai, though you are now twenty-seven, you are more youthful and radiant than ever before. The light of life shines through your eyes like a delicate sunbeam."

"That could be because she's pregnant and so, literally, she is the vessel of life."

"Wonderful observation, Hikaru. Just brilliant. Who would have ever thought that I was pregnant. My life has taken on a whole new meaning." I crossed my arms and leaned further back into the seat, glaring at Kurt. This was all his fault, and when I say all, I mean all.

"Look, Kate, I didn't so much as invite them as they showed up. You know how they are, and once the twins told everyone else in the Host club that it was your birthday they all ambushed me outside of the Chairman's office and basically threatened me. I _had_ to tell them our plans. I had no other choice."

_Shot through the heart and you're to blame_

_Darling, you give love a bad name_

"Kurt, I want you to listen to this song very carefully. It's Bon Jovi's _Bad Name_. Listen and weep." Jerkface. I hate me. Yes, this could be the hormones talking, but I just wanted to spend the night with Yuri, Hotaru, and Kurt. I _needed_, nay _deserved_ my solace, my karaoke, and my hamburger…minus pubescents.

_I play my part and you play your game_

_You give love a bad name_

"Ame-san, I don't think that's very nice. Hisu-san is just trying his best to make you happy because he loves you." Honey, sweet, adorable, innocent, Honey. Your cuteness isn't helping Mr. Hisugawa's case.

"Besides, we like being with you. You haven't been at Ouran much since you were forced to leave, and it has been almost two months since we've seen you." Kaoru pulled me towards him and leaned his head on my shoulder. This would seem affectionate and kind if the two demons hadn't been at my house previously today, hadn't actually threatened my fiancé if he didn't let them come tonight (which I do believe, though Kurt doesn't need to know that), and hadn't they been born little fox devils.

"Kaoru's right. We see Hisu-sensei every day. It's easy to get bored with someone you see every day"

I put my hand over my mouth to keep from laughing, but all that did was make the laugh come out of my nose with and awkward choking sound.

"Haruhi, was that really necessary? Your science grade doesn't only depend on your work you know." Kurt's cheeks were turning red, and he was nervously tapping his fingers on the table. Haruhi just shrugged and went back to her food. I guess the one redeeming feature of having to put up with this group of crazies is that I get to see Haruhi, one of the only sane people in my life.

"Oh, don't take this out on Haruhi's grade. She'd still ace the class even with you trying to conspire against her grade." I leaned over the table, kissing Kurt on the nose. Surprisingly, my large belly missed my water by mere centimeters.

"He wouldn't have time to take it out on her anyways since he will be in France with class 2A one week from today"

"Kyoya, you mind running that by me one more time?" I folded my hands and set my chin on them, grinning and looking at Kurt with the most sickeningly sweet expression I could.

"Mr. Hisugawa is class 2A's faculty chaperone on our trip to France, which we will be leaving for in a week's time. Actually, Mr. Hisugawa petitioned to move the trip back a week because he wanted to be here for your birthday." Kyoya pushed up his glasses, his evil smirk on his face. Yes, I should be angry with the Shadow King for knowing more than I did as well as probably purposefully exposing this information at the most inappropriate time, but no, I was not mad at Kyoya Ootori.

"Kate, I was going to tell you tomorrow. I swear on the life of my unborn child that I was."

"Bad move, Hisu-sempai" Hikaru and Kaoru said together, both of them placing their hands on my arms as if to hold me back from throwing a right hook at my fiancé.

"The life of your unborn child. The life of your unborn child! I'm seven months pregnant! What happens if I go into premature labor and you're in France!"

"Actually, Kate, it is highly unlikely that you'll go into premature labor at seven months. Maybe eight months but not seven." That's what he was going with. Oh, ho, ho, ho, was he in trouble.

"Shut-up! For all I know, Hotaru would call you while you're sight-seeing on the Eiffel Tower and you'll try to rush down to the ground floor but the elevators won't be working, and you won't be thinking straight, so you'll decide to take the stairs to get to me and then trip over your own two feet and fall down 20 flights of stairs, ending up in a coma, and all your baby will know about his or her father is that he snores even when he is unconscious!"

"Kate"

"What if some radioactive substance makes its way into the IV keeping you alive, and it not only kills you but revives you into some dead ninja zombie and you come after me and our child and we have the be on the run and then I'll have to shoot you in the head to save our little girl and the rest of the world!"

"Really, Kate? Really?"

"Yes. Really. I'm going to go karaoke to let off some steam. I have the perfect song too!" I stood up and stomp-wobbled over to the stage to get the microphone. I knew exactly what song would encompass all of my feelings. This was a song in English, so the fact that I knew most people here wouldn't understand a goddamn word I said worked in my favor.

I started singing, and I could see Kurt let his head fall onto the table…over and over and over again.

"I can't decide  
Whether you should live or die  
Oh, you'll probably go to heaven  
Please don't hang your head and cry  
No wonder why"

Tamaki and Yuri were simultaneously rubbing his back while the twins and Hotaru laughed their asses off, and rightfully so.

"My heart feels dead inside  
It's cold and hard and petrified  
Lock the doors and close the blinds  
We're going for a ride"

Kyoya just grinned and began writing in his little black book while Mori watched Honey bop his head from side to side, clearly unaware of what song this was, but Kurt knew. Kurt knew oh so well.

"Oh I could throw you in the lake  
Or feed you poisoned birthday cake  
I won't deny I'm gonna miss you when you're gone"

I watched as Kurt lifted up his head, his forehead red from where he smashed it down on the table one too many times and mouthed the words, "Touché, Amendier. Touché."

Victory is mine.

IIIII

Hope you enjoyed. If you did, then review, review, review. I'm gonna try and get the next chapter up before August, but we will see if that happens and I have time. Thanks!


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